how to figure out a capricorn...

l know capricorns and leos may not be the best match, but i pursued my relationship w my cap nonetheless. at first we were extremely happy, i think after that i may have been a little suffocating on him, but he still showed me a lot of love and attention constantly reassuring me etc. recently though we haven't been extremely happy in this relationship and it's experienced quite a few highs and lows. recently he told me that he lied about not really being interested in meeting his ex when she phoned him and asked to meet (she was in town, and then the day after she phoned him and asked him), then he went to visit her and hung out with her for a good 4 hours - i had no idea where he was since he didn't tell me that he was doing/where he was going. when he came home i was in a good mood since i was trying not to let all the negativity around me affect me and i asked him how he was etc, he lied and he said he went to the plaza with a few friends when in fact it was just his ex - he told me this later on in the night when he had a break down and said that he was unhappy with many things in his life including him worrying/caring too much about other people (me, his mother etc) and i took this personally in thinking that i wasn't making him happy. he then confessed he had no reason to lie to me, no real reason to get angry at me the way he did over silly things recently and i started crying when he confessed about lying about his ex. he told me that he desires her sexually but he knows he wants to be with me emotionally because he loves me and cares for me a whole lot, i don't know if he's done anything with her sexually yet because i asked but he could be lying. we've been dating for 10 months and i don't know what to do, i need some insight from another capricorn as to why he's behaving like this.

i care for him alot and i want to know if there is anything else i can do before i give up all hope and leave him, recently i've been feeling too hopeless and although i know i love him i'm scared he'll act upon his sexual urges.

i really don't know, i need some help with this.

Posted by RooSagicorn
It’s not good. He doesn’t know what he wants, and you can’t change that. I would walk away. He needs to figure out what he wants & you don’t need to be caught in the middle of that.

Do you live with him? I wasn’t sure based on what you said.

i don't actually live with him, this relationship is purely long distance so it makes the trust factor harder to handle. he was coming to visit me in two months and now this happens, honestly it's torn me in two and im not sure i can handle more since the relationship was turning destructive recently (him nitpicking things that i do and getting angry at them when i repeat that i only ever want to make him happy and not angry), i agree with the general line of what you're saying. he's emotionally inexperienced, never really had proper relationships before me but that isn't an excuse i guess.

Capricorns are fairly straightforward and aren't difficult to understand. Knowing that, you can take his actions at face value. Here are the facts:

This Cap lied to you about spending time with his ex and has even expressed sexual desire for her. That's a problem because he is coming (or came) dangerously close to infidelity. Lying to spend time with another woman that he's attracted to , especially an ex, is a big RED FLAG. Likewise he practically implied that he isn't interested in you sexually. Being in a relationship with a man who does not desire you sexually will not end well.

The Cap also expressed that he isn't happy in his life (which honestly has nothing to do with you). This is a big deal because men must be happy in our lives to have healthy romantic relationships. We must feel personally fulfilled in our lives. That being said, it's not your job to make him happy or to give him purpose. While partners can provide comfort, they can not provide a person with true inner joy.

Also what about YOUR happiness? This Cap seems to only be focused only on his happiness and not on how his actions affect your relationship. He has been acting selfishly and should not be rewarded with your continued presence or time. It's time to walk.

One reason I probably will never date a Cap again is how quickly they take those closest to them for granted. If they aren't happy in their own lives, they can become extremely negative and take it out on those around them.

Posted by Chuckcem
Capricorns are fairly straightforward and aren't difficult to understand. Knowing that, you can take his actions at face value. Here are the facts:

This Cap lied to you about spending time with his ex and has even expressed sexual desire for her. That's a problem because he is coming (or came) dangerously close to infidelity. Lying to spend time with another woman that he's attracted to , especially an ex, is a big RED FLAG. Likewise he practically implied that he isn't interested in you sexually. Being in a relationship with a man who does not desire you sexually will not end well.

The Cap also expressed that he isn't happy in his life (which honestly has nothing to do with you). This is a big deal because men must be happy in our lives to have healthy romantic relationships. We must feel personally fulfilled in our lives. That being said, it's not your job to make him happy or to give him purpose. While partners can provide comfort, they can not provide a person with true inner joy.

Also what about YOUR happiness? This Cap seems to only be focused only on his happiness and not on how his actions affect your relationship. He has been acting selfishly and should not be rewarded with your continued presence or time. It's time to walk.

One reason I probably will never date a Cap again is how quickly they take those closest to them for granted. If they aren't happy in their own lives, they can become extremely negative and take it out on those around them.

as for the whole sexual desire thing, our sex life has actually been really good - it's one of the only things in our relationship that would please me nowadays and i felt happy fulfilling his needs. however recently i don't think he's been able to make me happy because of our small fights, we have periods where in our relationship we do really well and get along excellently but this (him meeting his ex) is honestly too much for me. i agree with what everyone above here has said and i just needed a little bit more reasoning to reach my ultimatum. i appreciate you taking the time to reply, and i am rather selfless so i put his needs way before my own and now i have finally realised that it really isn't healthy to stay with him in this scenario.

Posted by UnicornSag
I would suggest same as others to leave him for now...he needs to figure himself. And considering he was gone for 4h and was perfectly fine with lying about it to you at first...I wouldn't be so sure he didn't do more than just talking. Maybe he has certain problems in life that are too much to handle for him and that's making him to be that way?

I'll just share my experience with my ex Cap but please don't take it as an example that Caps are like this and that he might have done same thing cause they aren't and I know Caps who are really great people and never done such things! So long story short, he broke up with me right after I had car accident which I told him about...I was shocked by such action simply cause it made no sense, how can you do something to someone who was still in a shock from such an event?! Regardless, I wasn't too affected cause truth to be told I wasn't head over hills about him so we actually stayed talking to each other for quite some time later. Soon after that he started dating another girl which I knew about. It was winter time and he gave her for whatever reason his car to drive and I literally told him-"what, you want to kill her so soon?" It was because car was on racing tires that are completely useless in winter. So, just few days after that, she had terrible car accident, car completely destroyed and she ended up in hospital with serious head and lungs injuries! He wanted to meet to talk to someone about it all and I accepted, we met, talked...but it was actually all about sex in the end. So, girlfriend in hospital, he calls his ex for talk and sex as well...Idk what to say, I was just in shock from all that, I cut out every contact with him soon after that.

But this one had serious issues in life overall, including his mother died when we started dating by doctor's mistake, so all this was just few months after...

his dad died a few years ago and he used coping mechanisms such as going out partying and having sex with women supposedly to make him feel better. in this relationship i took on a role where i cared and nurtured for him but honestly i don't think he's emotionally ready for something as serious as i want yet. he told me i was his first real committed relationship and he loves me alot however he doesn't know what he wants as countless people above have pointed out so i think i know what to do now. thank you for your input, i hope things are going well in your love life now.

Posted by LuckyLioness

Posted by Chuckcem
Capricorns are fairly straightforward and aren't difficult to understand. Knowing that, you can take his actions at face value. Here are the facts:

This Cap lied to you about spending time with his ex and has even expressed sexual desire for her. That's a problem because he is coming (or came) dangerously close to infidelity. Lying to spend time with another woman that he's attracted to , especially an ex, is a big RED FLAG. Likewise he practically implied that he isn't interested in you sexually. Being in a relationship with a man who does not desire you sexually will not end well.

The Cap also expressed that he isn't happy in his life (which honestly has nothing to do with you). This is a big deal because men must be happy in our lives to have healthy romantic relationships. We must feel personally fulfilled in our lives. That being said, it's not your job to make him happy or to give him purpose. While partners can provide comfort, they can not provide a person with true inner joy.

Also what about YOUR happiness? This Cap seems to only be focused only on his happiness and not on how his actions affect your relationship. He has been acting selfishly and should not be rewarded with your continued presence or time. It's time to walk.

One reason I probably will never date a Cap again is how quickly they take those closest to them for granted. If they aren't happy in their own lives, they can become extremely negative and take it out on those around them.

as for the whole sexual desire thing, our sex life has actually been really good - it's one of the only things in our relationship that would please me nowadays and i felt happy fulfilling his needs. however recently i don't think he's been able to make me happy because of our small fights, we have periods where in our relationship we do really well and get along excellently but this (him meeting his ex) is honestly too much for me. i agree with what everyone above here has said and i just needed a little bit more reasoning to reach my ultimatum. i appreciate you taking the time to reply, and i am rather selfless so i put his needs way before my own and now i have finally realised that it really isn't healthy to stay with him in this scenario.

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Well that's my point. Even if you feel that your sex life has been great, he may not be on the same page. That's a big problem for the relationship. Physical relationships are very important to men (even to those who won't admit it). It's the same way emotional relationships are very important to women. It's just how we're wired. So for the Cap to say that he wants his ex sexually and wants you emotionally, is a BIG red flag.

Glad to help. Honestly from an outsider's perspective this seems extremely unfair to you. If you are giving in the relationship, the Cap should be happy with you. He clearly has other issues he needs to sort out, but not on your time. I'm pretty sure you can replace this guy with someone who will adore you.

Leo and cap= roller coaster to heaven and hell