How to handle this CAP women?HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello, I need help from a Cap women on this. Please!
I met this young lady over 5 years ago. She was roommates with 2 of my friends. We had a huge crush on each other instantly. Physically is she everything I want. Her traits and flaws I adore. She had a BF at the time and I had an off and on GF. We would flirt with each other and that was it. She is a Dec 23th CAP (28 years old) and I am a Nov 16th Scorp (32 years old). Well, she ended up moving away with her BF at the soon. It ended badly after 4 years. She said it was her first true love. She moved back to my city. She carries a ton of relationship baggage and wonders if she will ever find another best friend like that again. Being a typical CAP is has tons of regrets from the past and worries about the future. She is also very busy with work and life took a huge shit on her recently. She is in the dumps a lot. Her living situation is bad, got in a car accident, feels like she hasn't accomplished what she's set out to do since she moved back and left her EX. She even recently told me she has been thinking about the good times they had and ETC and thinking about it a lot. ACCCKKKKKKK!!!! We??ll she works at the gym I go to and we went on a few dates and were dating in a very short time. The chemistry, things we had in common, sexuality & connection were out of this world!! We dated for about 3 months and she cut it off because she felt like we moved to fast and really didn't know each other that well. She told me she needs time to figure out what she wants. There was no lying or cheating. Everything was perfect. We had a crush on each other in the past and were getting involved to fast. I haven't had that connection with someone in a very long time. Mutually, we talked about a lot, dreams, wishes what we want in a relationship, etc. When we were dating she told me I could be the next love of her life, I totally do it for her and I felt the exact same. Everything was magical. I can't grasp they fact if those words hold true with her still or if it's all changed. Being a Scorpio I need some sort of idea wants going on in the others head. I need some info about if she feels the same or if she even thinks we could ever feel the way we did when we first started dating. We were both stressed out about life and needed to be apart. We remain friends; we stated maybe we can try to start over. She is SOOOOooo confusing and sends mixed signals. I??ll get booty calls and booty texts when she??_

I posted my response on the other thread.

I copied it here:

"when I express a lot to her she seems to fade"

Don't make her feel pressured. Back off a little bit, but keep being her friend. She will need to heal over her previuos relationship before she can continue to move forward with you. Give her time to figure things out. She will need to be sure of what she wants. It wouldn't hurt to let her miss you, but don't screw up. She needs to learn she can trust you. She needs to realize you're stable. But, don't push and don't pressure. Be fun. Be sweet, but don't be a wimp either. Make her laugh - we can't resist that!

I think she likes you, but she is a little confused. She might not be over the ex fully. You'd rather her be certain, I'm sure.

Good luck!

Thank you all!, I will back off a little like a lot of my friends have told me as well...
So, I should not confess how I am here for her anymore—. I should let her come to me when she's ready— Like I said she's not far I can see her everyday at the gym if I want to. But, I am currently choosing too avoid her there to see if she comes around.

@ sumrays
Ok thank you Soo much. I will change my angle. given you are a cap women. Do you like surprizes or is that considered stalking? is flowers at work too much or just enough. Being a Scorpio i love showering women with gifts I know she needs. My ex cap has told me her feelings are still there but she has to think about stuff. should I give a few days or go in with the romance?..?

@ Metoo. Very good points. When we were dating, yea she was my ride or die chick. That has faded. She has said multiple times life is tough for her she could use a homie to talk to, cause I make her smile and make her feel better. But, the affections seem to be on her terms and times and its confusing. Were both goin to this concert at this small venue on Monday, not together but we planned it months ago and both love the artist. So this meeting with alcohol and the whole seen very interesting. So, I will let her be for a bit and gauge her body language. She can't go more than 2-3 days without texting me, but one day she's flying high the next its like I barley exist. I need to input that I can be trusted and to take a chance before she misses a chance. Not at this moment. But, eventually. Right?

Yes, now I am confused..Sigh*

That means she has a venus in scorpio. It may take her a while to completely get over her ex.

To answer your question though, you handle a Cap woman by literally handling her. I have the same placements she does. I dont know about other Cap ladies, but if a guy is waiting for me to take the lead or lead the relationship then its f#@ked. Im a flip floppy hot/cold Cap with EVERYBODY...I dont discriminate. I want and desire to be claimed. That is the only way Im going to get got at this point. Your Cappy might be similar.

Be you, and be confident in be being you. I dont think its best to sit back and let her run the show by making these late night calls, or allowing her to do things on her terms. She doesnt know what shes doing, and Its leaving you frustrated and its getting you further from where you want to be. Dont accept that. Make your desires known and make her respect you, your terms, and your time....in a nice way lol. Its just as valuable. Really, I think you would have a better chance if you removed all fear. I cant get into a guy thats afraid to show himself or gets hurt by rejection, only because that makes me feel he'll always keep part of himself protected, which means theres no real trust. If you dont trust pouring out your feelings to her, then work on building trust first. That way, If you open up you will get it in return.

But first and foremost, give her time to get over her ex, which means stop making yourself available to her.

@metoo
good question. If you said you've played guys before in this position then that's all I need to hear. I really dont know what she's thinking half of the time. That's why all of this sucks. All I need to know is if she feels like we can get back to how we both felt when we were first dating ever again? Yes or No. There should be no maybe! My boy who was her roommate back in the day said the same thing. She's playing me. Were not together, but shes told me she was goin home to pass out after work when I asked if she wanted to hang out. Then she goes out. Not a big deal. Just when I ask say your goin out, don't say your tired and your gunna go home and pass the f' out. That kinda rubbed me the wrong way.! That was Halloween night.

Very true@ Beta. benefit of the doubt

We ran into each other at the dog park the day after Halloween And she says, Do you wanna see what I wore last night and shows me pics on her phone. Soo...
Then this same day. We kiss and hug when we part ways. This girl is taking my Scorpio heart on an emotional rollercoaster.

She just came out of a deep relationship that ended badly. And it was with her first bf u said?

She is not ready at all. She might have feelings for you, but to really be in a committed relationship again, feels like its too soon. She is not ready. You guys could get together, but over time, all her baggage and stuff will resurface, but this time it will be projected onto you. You will end up having to literally lose your dignity in getting her to really trust you again. Even if you did nothing wrong, if it feels like you did something wrong to her, you did something wrong.

She likes you, but the fact that she's hesitant tells you a lot! Don't push, don't be worried about some guy getting her first, cz she's not ready.
The best thing to do would be to really talk about this with her...

What you both want, and take your time getting there...
She needs to work onherself and nourish her soul for a while, and you deserve a woman who is able to be there for you wholeheartedly without always looking out the back door because she hasn't dealt with her past.
She's still really hurting. And she needs to focus on self-growth. As a man, you could be there for her in a healthy way, don't take anything from her, I mean emotionally, because she has almost nothing to give.

She just came out of a deep relationship that ended badly. And it was with her first bf u said?

She is not ready at all. She might have feelings for you, but to really be in a committed relationship again, feels like its too soon. She is not ready. You guys could get together, but over time, all her baggage and stuff will resurface, but this time it will be projected onto you. You will end up having to literally lose your dignity in getting her to really trust you again. Even if you did nothing wrong, if it feels like you did something wrong to her, you did something wrong.

She likes you, but the fact that she's hesitant tells you a lot! Don't push, don't be worried about some guy getting her first, cz she's not ready.
The best thing to do would be to really talk about this with her...

What you both want, and take your time getting there...
She needs to work onherself and nourish her soul for a while, and you deserve a woman who is able to be there for you wholeheartedly without always looking out the back door because she hasn't dealt with her past.
She's still really hurting. And she needs to focus on self-growth. As a man, you could be there for her in a healthy way, don't take anything from her, I mean emotionally, because she has almost nothing to give.

Her Ex lives in AZ and we live in CA by the way.

@ @metoo. You couldn't be anymore right. Iove the Chase and feel like what ever little stuff she thinks I did will blow over in time. But, your most likey also right about the other guys or she is reaching out to her ex too. Cause the other day I walked into her office at work to say hi. She was on her phone she looked up and said I scared her. WTF! Never a response I get from her. Then no smile she says hey what's up? So, I do feel the She's just not that into you phrase fits her now. But, the chemistry and how heavy we were can't be forgotten easy. Women can say one things and over time forget why they were even mad. I want to get some for the record info b4 I move on but what do you Cap women think?....

I hope and wait for some sign but from what I hear. that sign ain't coming!

Is it safe to text her? When her soul is nourished and she has healed, I'm here for her. Something along those lines. Word it different maybe... Or is that too needy and straight up wack?

Damn, Metro seems like you know me to well. I am most def trying to duplicate the feelings and fireworks from the start of our relationship. Having that go to person all the time. I'm going to try and disappear for a while and see what happens next. I never thought about how all of these experiences in her life have changed her. Interesting angle. But, again your right again! It's crazy how I try to avoid her and go to the park when I know she's at work and she shows up saying she took the day off. I go to the gym hours after she off and she's there workin out. She's never seen my crazy Scorpio side. I keep in down low. And come on here and type all the time....