Cap Women!—

This question is to the Cap women - when a date/boyfriend/significant other always wants to pay for everything, every time, how does it make you feel?

I think its great to have a man who wants to pay for everything, but sometimes, I feel guilty about it. I want to pitch in and pick up the tab sometimes, too. But Aqua won't let me. (We've had probably 12-15 dates).

He has a Cap venus, so I know he's old fashioned in his thinking. Don't get me wrong! I do appreciate it, but I don't want him to feel he always has to pay. I suppose he likes to.

Am I crazy? Does anyone else feel this way.

I've never had that, but I would be bothered a bit too.

I don't like too much of anything. Not saying that I'd appreciate picking up the tab either, but every blue moon wouldn't hurt.

I was watching a youtube video of Kyle Richards on The View, she's a Cappy, and she feels a woman should NEVER pick up the tab.

I've just learned to invite him over for dinner a lot. So, then I feel as if I'm reciprocating.

Posted by truecap
I've just learned to invite him over for dinner a lot. So, then I feel as if I'm reciprocating.

See that's nice, but I was reading on another forum the other day where guys were saying women need to stop making it easier for them, especially if they want to do things for you. A girl had posted about her situation where she offered to take the train to this guy house instead of him driving all the way out to pick her up, and he told her the walk from the train station to his house was 20 minutes, with no offer to get her. Of course she canceled, then ignored him, and he called her a bad name. It just went south, but the guys posting were saying she just should have let him make the drive and that we have to stop being so eager to meet men half way. I'm not sure if your situation would apply, especially not after 12-15 dates, but if he hasn't suggested cooking, then I'm wondering if you should let him continue to take you out?

He has cooked for me, too. One day, he did some manual household labor for me (that I couldn't have done on my own) and then when I offered to pay for dinner that night (to pay him back), he wouldn't let me. I'm sure he appreciated the guesture, though.

I think he just likes for me to let him be a man. Thats probably the key to what the men on that forum were trying to get across. Some of them feel emasculated by today's women. They are right, we should go back to traditional roles, if thats what they were meaning.

He is very traditional. Its sweet and refreshing! I've had to learn to just let him take care of me, do things for me, pay my way, etc. I'M NOT COMPLAINING BY NO MEANS!!!!! Its nice for a man to be that way! I like him a lot and its a natural, easy relationship. He's a great guy!

I just wondered if anyone else felt the way I do about wanting to reciprocate.

Thanks yall!! I feel better about it. And I'm a good cook and have forgotten that I really enjoy cooking for people who appreciate it! This afternoon, I spent three hours cooking from scratch. Last night he took my me, my son and his son to the movies. So I guess that makes us even! Fair trade.

And, cowpuncher, if you weren't so far away, I'd bake you something! 🙂

Thanks! I believe he does appreciate it.

And I'm in rural BFE too! Us "country folk" gotta stick together!

Posted by truecap
He has cooked for me, too. One day, he did some manual household labor for me (that I couldn't have done on my own) and then when I offered to pay for dinner that night (to pay him back), he wouldn't let me. I'm sure he appreciated the guesture, though.

I think he just likes for me to let him be a man. Thats probably the key to what the men on that forum were trying to get across. Some of them feel emasculated by today's women. They are right, we should go back to traditional roles, if thats what they were meaning.

He is very traditional. Its sweet and refreshing! I've had to learn to just let him take care of me, do things for me, pay my way, etc. I'M NOT COMPLAINING BY NO MEANS!!!!! Its nice for a man to be that way! I like him a lot and its a natural, easy relationship. He's a great guy!

I just wondered if anyone else felt the way I do about wanting to reciprocate.

When we go out on dates, my bf loves being the man...and paying up. At the beginning we would pay for our own meals...but after we began to really feel like we're together,it feels right to take turns.