Mixed reviews about Caps and Cancers?

Hello everyone 🙂 This is my very first post. I will keep it simple. I realize that Caps and Cancers are at the polar opposites, but how come there are some sites that rave about the two together and some sites say Cancers are the most irritating people to Caps. I am female Cancer, my crush is a Cap. He's gone disappeared on me. I will follow up with the situation later, but for now, I'd like to know what a match between Cancer female and Capricorn male is really all about? ---Thank You for reading.

I think if they are both evolved, then it is a great pairing. Cancer is more emotional; Cap is not outwardly emotional. On the negative side: Cancer may not get what they want from Cap and Cap might think they are needy. On the positive side: They both need to be willing to recognize and accept the other - Once they do, they balance each other out. I have dated four Cancers in my life - 3 were really awesome relationships. And my BFF and college roomies are both cancers and we get along superbly!

To be honest I really think it depends on the individual. I wouldn't base your relationship soley on astrology. caps and cancers can be great together but with alot of compromise. I had a bad experience with a cap man but not all cappy men are the same. I have alot of friends that are caps and I love to hang around with them always a good time. I agree with truecap you may not always get what you want and TRUST me its gonna be work to get a cappy to open up and commit to you. About the disappearing acts they are known for doing that. Give him his space but not too much space. I say if its more than a week..hunt his butt down and find out what is going on. Don't let him play games. I have a cousin who is a cap and she dissppears for weeks and i always have to call her and ask her if she is alive..lol

Posted by crabcakesandmayo
If you ignore them (no txt, no calls, no NOTHING) they will eventually come out and play again.

If I make an effort and get ignored, I'm not making another one. Yes, it will intrigue me and get under my skin, but ultimately it will piss me off and I'll write you off as not worth the effort. Be careful with that advice. On the other hand, we do like a challenge, so don't be easy. Best to be yourself, don't play a game to get our attention - we see through it. Then we won't come back to play. If we do, it will be ONLY to play.

Of course, I think the men might be different.

Yeah, I think the men like the be ignored just a little bit. The women, not at all. Well, not me.

Thanks for the perspective everyone. I've only known him a month and it started out with him coming on too strong (for anyone else but I'm a traditional girl so I enjoyed it) with compliments and some references to a future me and him, marriage and etc... Then after I did a mental assessment of that night, I realized perhaps I may have come off as distant/ambiguous so I sent him an email "for the sake of sincerity and clarity" and i basically wrote that I was interested and just needed a little bit of time to avoid the unwanted rebound effect and to work on myself a bit bc I want to give the next guy "only the very best version of myself bc the next guy i will choose will be the very best." I even turned things around on him and implied the future me and him as well. He knew he didn't have to respond but he did anyways. All he said was, "Super cute. feelings are mutual," Then he was suddenly just busy at work. He didn't even acknowledge an invite for a Friday event that I texted him on Monday (whereas the previous week, he had replied the same Tuesday morning that i sent him a text invite!) .....Finally I said to him: —I am inspired by and really admire you being life/career goal-oriented. I just can't tell whether I should be turned on by your ambition or turned off by your unavailability. But I certainly do not want to bother you while you are busy at work so have a good day~ xo?? ...To which he just replied, "You do the same xo" .....We are both on a rebound so next day I asked him if he was the dumper or the dumped and how long the relationship was. I was the dumper, 3 years. He was the dumped, 2 years, she lived with him for a year and moved out 3 months ago. He is "transitioning back into the dating scene." I apologized for not realizing that was the case (that he got dumped) so I asked if he believed the rebound effect exists whether you are the dumper or the dumped. He answered, "I believe that the ego of both parties is vulnerable. The need to get into relationship to redeem ones esteem is especially a precarious situation for the dumped party." ....I don't know why, but his response just made me feel discouraged and uneasy. So finally 8 hours or so later, this is what I said to him.....

...eight or so hours later, I responded, "Well put,I agree..by definition, u came on too strong that night but im not intimidated by a man who knows what he wants & u were adorable. But i still warned myself bc i know that the quicker the fall for-the quicker the fall out of. I could tell u were on a rebound. I've only met rebound [name withheld]. I don't know who u really are. I just know that u are unavailable & so was my ex which is why i couldnt take it anymore. I was very unhappy & it took strength to walk away. Friday night it all came crashing down when your version of unavailability brought back similar feelings & i cried before passing out. I thought taking things slow meant not having sex or placing a label too soon no pressure no expectations. I was so naive & failed to factor in FEELINGS. it just quietly crept up from behind!?!?! This is really bittersweet. I think u are such an amazing person and thats not rebound me talking. we seem to want the same things in life. ..Its my nature to rescue take care nurture your self-esteem be by your side but i have to resist bc i know it will not turn out well for me and I'll only get hurt. Sometimes my strengths also act as my weakness. You do not threaten my stability but i am vulnerable to getting hurt if i stick around. We know nothing about each other enough that u would catch me if i fall. Believing it based only on the fact that i know id be there to catch u would otherwise be very foolish of me to rely on. Take care xoxo" .........And from there began my silent treatment. Then next day I was so sad over it. I texted him, "Is there any way for u to admit that u misjudged the kind of girl I am, that u thought i'd be gullible, have sex with u, then u could keep moving onto the next conquest, until ur recent breakup finally feels like it happened decades ago. This whole thing would just make a lot more sense to me, since it's not something I can just google so I have to go to the actual source--You." .........And that just about solidified my silent treatment. Anyone care to point out every single mistake I made? Because why do I have a feeling those two paragraphs are SPRINKLED WITH MISTAKES. .....Now what— 😢

Wtf with these men talking about the future, marriage, kids, white picket fenced houses so darn soon? Red flag numero uno. Make sure its not the rehearsed intro showing glimpses of a "possible" finale that has you hooked. Disregard everything he initially said and see if theres anything else there making any of this worth it.

That's a lot of pouring out of emotions and feelings in a text message...
IMO, this should have been a face to face conversation. If this cappy has "good" intentions, he will contact you AFTER he digests everything in your messages and analyzes it forwards, backwards and makes sense of it in his mind. Timing will not be to your liking. He is on his own timetable, which will undoubtedly irritate the begeeseezes out of you.

If you really like the guy, hang in there.

Oh and to answer your original posting...Caps and Cancers can work (its a fine mixture of irrational and rational behaviors). It's just a matter of how much effort is willing to be expended by both parties.

I love my Cappy 😉

Maybe he felt you were falsely judging him? Do you know for sure that he wanted to have something with you just for sex? He sounded really mature in the conversations you laid out, and you did too, until that long text about how you felt.
Do you think he might have thought you were willing to be something with him, and then suddenly, with that text, seemed like you weren't? From what I read, I wasn't expecting you to be the one to pull out of this. He probably doesn't know how to respond/confused and may feel hurt. You also let a lot of your insecurities be known with that text, and what he interprets that that means for him may also make him stand offish.

*1 of 3* UPDATE: I've been doing 1 text OR email (not both)...I figure by Sunday (making it a week since silent treatment began), I will just delete his number (and keep it written on a postit and stick it under my bed lol) and just move on considering it will be his lose bc I'm seriously an all out package deal inside and out. He said I was "Special and always will be" as I am the first & only asian girl he's ever danced with & kissed and he had always wanted to meet and asian girl but thought they would not like him. (But I like him, I kissed him first! hehe) He has complimented me for being intelligent he says I am an over-achiever, witty, good dancer (I guess his ex hated to dance), beautiful/gorgeous, perceptive, he called me a pistol one time lol, sensual, sexy he did call me "kinky" and "freak" once while sexting as in, "You lill freak. I want to reach places inside you didn't even know existed," >WHOA! effing hottie.< And the part I love the most is that I'm in school to become a social worker and turns out he is a social worker for the state! past few years now since graduating college. I told him if nothing else, i want him to be my mentor bc I was inspired by his ambitions for the field. He told me his vision for it and it's intense. I was captivated the whole time he delivered his passionate speech about his plans about it! ::sigh::

*2 of 3* UPDATE: I admit, that super long emotional text was an emo-trainwreck, but I've since sent him an email that STARTed with: "The only thing I wish to express my most sincere apology for is when I inappropriately questioned your integrity and intentions. I did not mean to offend you. Its unfortunate that the rebound effect finally got me and I did not expect it to manifest in the form of doubt and mistrust. I regret that I allowed it to get the best of me, but at least I've discovered what it is I need to work on in order to dissolve any residual effects that would negatively affect my future relationships." ...ENDing with: "This is a heavy letter and I know it's a lot for you to take in right now. It will probably make you feel very intense inside and you will be so freaking scared and uncomfortable. (It's going to be okay.) Just run fast, [name withheld]. Run as fast as you can and as far away as you want to go until you no longer feel scared or confused inside. Then turn around when you are ready. I believe that we started something that had the potential for something absolutely magnificent and we owe it to ourselves to finish it to the end."

If he comes back I don't even know what I will do anymore, but I can't keep putting myself out there. I would keep going if I knew that he would be there to catch me if I fall, but he knew me one month, says all that stuff, then just disappears without saying anything. How is anybody supposed to feel encouraged by that? Who would put themselves out on the line for THAT kind of ambivalence?? I've never met a guy like this before. Who does that but guys who just wants to get in your pants then disappear, but he never even got in my pants! Even a "you suck..have a good life"-type of text would be better than a silent getaway. I thought Caps are supposed to be honest and direct, so why don't I know where I stand right now— I even gave him a way out when I sent the text that said, "Is there any way you can just admit that you misjudged the kinda girl I am..[see previous post]" And Nothing. There are guys who wouldn't have the balls to say bye in person but would happily take the way out through text especially if u serve it to them and all they had to do was respond with a Yeah. But this guy is just pure silence. It's a bit rude and disrespectful. I am a lady and his behavior is far from that of a gentleman right now.

*3 of 3* UPDATE: If he doesn't actually think I'm amazing then whatever bc I think I'm amazing and so does lots of other people. And if he DOES think I'm amazing, then he is a little pussycat for being intimidated and doing a silent bailout and I don't care for weaklings. ----So which one is it? Is this silent pussycat planning on ever handing me the courtesy of an explanation or at least a proper goodbye——? YOU DARN CAPPIES!!!!

Anyways, here is our natal chart...mine is the first one, followed by his: We are both 26-years-old.

--ME--
SunCancer
MoonVirgo
MercuryLeo
VenusGemini
MarsCancer
JupiterAquarius
SaturnScorpio
UranusSagittarius
NeptuneCapricorn
PlutoScorpio
LilithTaurus
Asc node Taurus

--HIM--
SunCapricorn
MoonCancer
MercurySagittarius
VenusCapricorn
MarsScorpio
JupiterAquarius
SaturnSagittarius
UranusSagittarius
NeptuneCapricorn
PlutoScorpio
LilithTaurus
Asc node Taurus

THANK YOU AGAIN EVERYONE FOR HELPING ME THROUGH THIS. I DON'T DISLIKE CAPPIES BY THE WAY, YOU'RE JUST A PAINFUL ENIGMA.

oh btw, he also asked how tall I was and i said it then he goes, "awesome. that fits my criteria." --criteria?? what you got a mental checklist up there?? I was tempted to ask him what this criteria entailed but I didn't want to seem nosey nor did I want to know his expectations bc I was already smitten by him and didn't want to find myself tailoring me to fit his stupid criteria. I'm gonna blindly just be me and if that fits his criteria, whatever the heck is on that list, then AWESOME FOR ME. ...now if only he would just get his butt back in the picture so we can finish checking off the boxes from each other's checklist of criteria.......................grr

I think he'll eventually get back to you. Sounds like he was "on" that first month or so, now he's "off" and it can have nothing to do with you btw.

I doubt this is your last time hearing from him.