confusedpiscesgirl
@confusedpiscesgirl
7 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 26 · Topics: 2
my cap man admitted to keeping me at a distance, said he cared for me, but is focusing on him...
i'll add that he also said he's not seeing or dating anyone else...
I will keep an eye on your thread because I had the same dilemma(I am still curious though).What I did was to cut the sex, be just friends and then cut him off totally, because he wasn't happy with us being just friends (without benefits).
If I have to give you an advice I would say to cut him off .I lost a year (and 2 months) in a situation exactly like yours (and adding another 6 months being just friends).
There are 80% chances things aren't going to change (no matter what you'll do), so you better save yourself some time by stopping things now.
Sorry if I am a bit harsh and pessimistic, but it's your heart and your time in game, so you don't need a sugar-coated answer.
If I have to give you an advice I would say to cut him off .I lost a year (and 2 months) in a situation exactly like yours (and adding another 6 months being just friends).
There are 80% chances things aren't going to change (no matter what you'll do), so you better save yourself some time by stopping things now.
Sorry if I am a bit harsh and pessimistic, but it's your heart and your time in game, so you don't need a sugar-coated answer.
She doesn't have to be patient.She has already invested emotionally in this relationship.She has been honest with him and he has made his intensions clear.
It depends on how emotionally mature is a cap,but one thing is sure with them, if you allow them to treat you bad they will (not intentionally).You have to show them that you have a strong character with solid life principles, that you have integrity and you don't put up with his bullshit.
First thing you need from a cap is respect, if you ,after you confessed your feelings, will stay around waiting for him to know you better, to decide what he wants etc he will see you as a weak person (sweet yes,but mostly weak).
If you don't want to walk away forever you have to think of a smart strategy (as childish as it sounds),but even that presents some risks.
It depends on how emotionally mature is a cap,but one thing is sure with them, if you allow them to treat you bad they will (not intentionally).You have to show them that you have a strong character with solid life principles, that you have integrity and you don't put up with his bullshit.
First thing you need from a cap is respect, if you ,after you confessed your feelings, will stay around waiting for him to know you better, to decide what he wants etc he will see you as a weak person (sweet yes,but mostly weak).
If you don't want to walk away forever you have to think of a smart strategy (as childish as it sounds),but even that presents some risks.
He’s not invested/not interested. Do you want a man who kinda likes you or someone who adores you? After 9 months? He knows whether he likes you or not. End this and wait for the guy who says he wants to be with you. Sooner the better.
Posted by KoniuchaaAbsolutely unless maybe in 1 out of 100 he just wants to see her face expression.Posted by LeowwwwwYes. Anyone that tells you they’re fine with you seeing other people, definitely is not that in to you
Posted by confusedpiscesgirl
He then proceeded to say how much he cares for me and how he respects if I see other guys but he doesn't want what he have to end because he still needs to explore how he feels but also needs to work on his achievements.
Kiss of death.
click to expand
My husband told me I can duck people as long as he doesn’t know. But if he only knew - he wouldn’t be as bratty and whatever...he would DIE!
Posted by confusedpiscesgirlHe doesn't care enough. He likes you in a way, he spends time with you but doesn't really see you as a potential partner yet. He is being honest with you. We, capricorn are ambitious and our first priority is not a matter of heart. He is telling you the truth, he's not ready yet..but it doesn't mean that there is no possibility. With Capricorns, you really need to be patient..When people rush us, we tend to pull away and distance ourselves..We really need time to think before making a decision..
Ok so I need advice.
I have been dating a cap man with a moon in taurus and venus in cap for 9 months now. We met as he was my yoga student for two years prior to us starting anything I noticed he would slowly open up more and more and eventually we hung out outside of yoga. We took it slow at first... and then we started sleeping together.
He has always shown respect for me and seemed interested asking me about work ( I own my own business aside from teaching yoga) and asking me about things going on in my life and giving me his own personal suggestions and help in regards to work and day to day things.
I always made sure to compliment him to make it known how much I think the things he's insecure about are great and little things like that. He would open up to me about his stresses and I listened intently. Everything has been amazing and things have been going well- all of the signs that a capricorn man is interested have been there so I have stuck around because I really like the guy and I see us being more than what we are at the moment which I guess is dating or hooking up without any specific label...
Here's the thing- I finally was able to admit my feelings to him. He listened intently with eye contact the whole time and was so shocked that I liked him and kept saying that I shouldn't like him and that it hasn't been long enough yet for him to decide what he feels for me and for him to truly even know me. That concept is crazy to me bc i feel like I know everything about him!
He even admitted to keeping me at a distance (not talking for days, texting and making plans on his time...etc,.) because he is "being selfish and still working on his goals".
He then proceeded to say how much he cares for me and how he respects if I see other guys but he doesn't want what he have to end because he still needs to explore how he feels but also needs to work on his achievements.
Any capricorn men have any advice on what I should do next?
cut him off, see other people, ignore him on his next attempt to see me or actually keep it going with him and give him a chance to get to know me more.....? help!
Posted by confusedpiscesgirlAlso, do not give him sex..Capricorns are picky, if you want him to see you as a potential partner if you are willing to be patient. You need to show him that you are not easy. If you keep on giving him sex without being committed, he won't respect you and just do a FWB thing with you..
Ok so I need advice.
I have been dating a cap man with a moon in taurus and venus in cap for 9 months now. We met as he was my yoga student for two years prior to us starting anything I noticed he would slowly open up more and more and eventually we hung out outside of yoga. We took it slow at first... and then we started sleeping together.
He has always shown respect for me and seemed interested asking me about work ( I own my own business aside from teaching yoga) and asking me about things going on in my life and giving me his own personal suggestions and help in regards to work and day to day things.
I always made sure to compliment him to make it known how much I think the things he's insecure about are great and little things like that. He would open up to me about his stresses and I listened intently. Everything has been amazing and things have been going well- all of the signs that a capricorn man is interested have been there so I have stuck around because I really like the guy and I see us being more than what we are at the moment which I guess is dating or hooking up without any specific label...
Here's the thing- I finally was able to admit my feelings to him. He listened intently with eye contact the whole time and was so shocked that I liked him and kept saying that I shouldn't like him and that it hasn't been long enough yet for him to decide what he feels for me and for him to truly even know me. That concept is crazy to me bc i feel like I know everything about him!
He even admitted to keeping me at a distance (not talking for days, texting and making plans on his time...etc,.) because he is "being selfish and still working on his goals".
He then proceeded to say how much he cares for me and how he respects if I see other guys but he doesn't want what he have to end because he still needs to explore how he feels but also needs to work on his achievements.
Any capricorn men have any advice on what I should do next?
cut him off, see other people, ignore him on his next attempt to see me or actually keep it going with him and give him a chance to get to know me more.....? help!
Posted by Cvurkoo
With caps you gotta be pretty patient (Taurus moon too).
Given that you are really into the guy, seeing other men wont help you and is pointless. I see the benefit of you being patient with and showing him that you are there to stay. Be very conscious about how you feel though. If at certain point this incertitude starts to take a toll on you, you should do whatever is needed to stay in a good mental and emotional state.
My advice is to give him time but don't invest yourself too much at this point.
I am definitely taking time and my space- I told him I couldn't do our dating/sleeping together thing anymore. I know he will be back and once he does sex will be off the table and I will keep him around as a friend (if I can) and I will stay patient and let him know I am here to stay. Do you think I will still have a chance doing all of that?
Posted by CapricornWoman13sex is definitely off the table at this pointPosted by confusedpiscesgirlAlso, do not give him sex..Capricorns are picky, if you want him to see you as a potential partner if you are willing to be patient. You need to show him that you are not easy. If you keep on giving him sex without being committed, he won't respect you and just do a FWB thing with you..
Ok so I need advice.
I have been dating a cap man with a moon in taurus and venus in cap for 9 months now. We met as he was my yoga student for two years prior to us starting anything I noticed he would slowly open up more and more and eventually we hung out outside of yoga. We took it slow at first... and then we started sleeping together.
He has always shown respect for me and seemed interested asking me about work ( I own my own business aside from teaching yoga) and asking me about things going on in my life and giving me his own personal suggestions and help in regards to work and day to day things.
I always made sure to compliment him to make it known how much I think the things he's insecure about are great and little things like that. He would open up to me about his stresses and I listened intently. Everything has been amazing and things have been going well- all of the signs that a capricorn man is interested have been there so I have stuck around because I really like the guy and I see us being more than what we are at the moment which I guess is dating or hooking up without any specific label...
Here's the thing- I finally was able to admit my feelings to him. He listened intently with eye contact the whole time and was so shocked that I liked him and kept saying that I shouldn't like him and that it hasn't been long enough yet for him to decide what he feels for me and for him to truly even know me. That concept is crazy to me bc i feel like I know everything about him!
He even admitted to keeping me at a distance (not talking for days, texting and making plans on his time...etc,.) because he is "being selfish and still working on his goals".
He then proceeded to say how much he cares for me and how he respects if I see other guys but he doesn't want what he have to end because he still needs to explore how he feels but also needs to work on his achievements.
Any capricorn men have any advice on what I should do next?
cut him off, see other people, ignore him on his next attempt to see me or actually keep it going with him and give him a chance to get to know me more.....? help!
click to expand
Low-key rejecting you
also is it best that next time he reaches out to me i ignore him or ?
he is a cap with very low self esteem
he is a cap with very low self esteem
Posted by Cvurkoo
With caps you gotta be pretty patient (Taurus moon too).
Given that you are really into the guy, seeing other men wont help you and is pointless. I see the benefit of you being patient with and showing him that you are there to stay. Be very conscious about how you feel though. If at certain point this incertitude starts to take a toll on you, you should do whatever is needed to stay in a good mental and emotional state.
My advice is to give him time but don't invest yourself too much at this point.
i've been very patient. i'll continue to do so from afar- I am not going to reach out. waiting for him to do so but also I will continue to date and see whats out there
Posted by RooSagicornim not necessarily trying to stay friends... last thing I need is more friendsPosted by confusedpiscesgirlHow can you stay friends if you ignore him?
also is it best that next time he reaches out to me i ignore him or ?
he is a cap with very low self esteemclick to expand
Posted by CapricornWoman13what do you suggest I do at this point in that case?Posted by confusedpiscesgirlHe doesn't care enough. He likes you in a way, he spends time with you but doesn't really see you as a potential partner yet. He is being honest with you. We, capricorn are ambitious and our first priority is not a matter of heart. He is telling you the truth, he's not ready yet..but it doesn't mean that there is no possibility. With Capricorns, you really need to be patient..When people rush us, we tend to pull away and distance ourselves..We really need time to think before making a decision..
Ok so I need advice.
I have been dating a cap man with a moon in taurus and venus in cap for 9 months now. We met as he was my yoga student for two years prior to us starting anything I noticed he would slowly open up more and more and eventually we hung out outside of yoga. We took it slow at first... and then we started sleeping together.
He has always shown respect for me and seemed interested asking me about work ( I own my own business aside from teaching yoga) and asking me about things going on in my life and giving me his own personal suggestions and help in regards to work and day to day things.
I always made sure to compliment him to make it known how much I think the things he's insecure about are great and little things like that. He would open up to me about his stresses and I listened intently. Everything has been amazing and things have been going well- all of the signs that a capricorn man is interested have been there so I have stuck around because I really like the guy and I see us being more than what we are at the moment which I guess is dating or hooking up without any specific label...
Here's the thing- I finally was able to admit my feelings to him. He listened intently with eye contact the whole time and was so shocked that I liked him and kept saying that I shouldn't like him and that it hasn't been long enough yet for him to decide what he feels for me and for him to truly even know me. That concept is crazy to me bc i feel like I know everything about him!
He even admitted to keeping me at a distance (not talking for days, texting and making plans on his time...etc,.) because he is "being selfish and still working on his goals".
He then proceeded to say how much he cares for me and how he respects if I see other guys but he doesn't want what he have to end because he still needs to explore how he feels but also needs to work on his achievements.
Any capricorn men have any advice on what I should do next?
cut him off, see other people, ignore him on his next attempt to see me or actually keep it going with him and give him a chance to get to know me more.....? help!
click to expand
Posted by RooSagicorndon't think i said thatPosted by confusedpiscesgirlPosted by RooSagicornim not necessarily trying to stay friends... last thing I need is more friendsPosted by confusedpiscesgirlHow can you stay friends if you ignore him?
also is it best that next time he reaches out to me i ignore him or ?
he is a cap with very low self esteem
Um I thought you just said you’d keep him as a friend.
click to expand
Posted by crazysiouxWell fuckung said!!!
Enough.
Gordon Ramsey time: Kick his sorry smoke blowing player ass to the god damned curb without a second thought. Motherfucker couldn't decide to shit or get off the pot for 9 months into a 2 year FWB (and it was a FWB relationship in his eyes; he was getting the benefits while you got the shaft) and has the gall to be shocked at you confessing your feelings?!? Look, it's as plain as day: when he tells you that you shouldn't like him, believe him. When he treats you as if you don't matter, believe him. When he treats you as an option instead of a priority, believe him. If he acts like he can live his life without you, make it fucking easier for him to do just that.
His low-esteem is just that: HIS!
Not your problem - you ain't Dr. Phil ...
Purge the prick. With or without a text message consisting of, "youaretheweakestlink, g'bye" ...
Anything less that that is being a glutton for further punishment than you already are!click to expand
Posted by RooSagicornThis 👆
He doesn’t care enough. If he did, he wouldn’t want you to see others. So basically he just wants a casual thing because you’ve allowed it. He keeps limits to not allow you too close..
So question is what do you want? A casual thing or a relationship? Casual - well you’ve got it & continue on. If more, act like you want more and walk away. Leave the door open if you want in case your absence all of a sudden makes him realize what he really wants. It happens sometimes with Caps.
When i don’t care if a guy I am dating is seeing other people, I really don’t want him. I may like him, just not seriously. Everyone already gave good advice. This guy just does not deserve your attention or time. If he’s still attending your yoga classes, you should politely ask him to not do so and cut him out of your life.
hey guys sorry didn't mean to hide the post. don't know if it's still hidden or not?
Anyways a little update:
This whole situation went down last week. Exactly one week later to date he texted me nonchalantly saying "hey happy tuesday" Hours later I still hadn't answered so with that he then proceeded with a "how are you" I finally responded " I'm doing well, and you?" He said "I'm stressed" I didn't answer. A few hours later he showed up at my yoga class- naturally I was caught off guard but I definitely acted very off towards him and didn't go out of my way to make any conversation. After class he grabbed my wrist as I was talking with another guy and he said "hey thanks for class *insert my name*" and then was that.
what the fuck...
Anyways a little update:
This whole situation went down last week. Exactly one week later to date he texted me nonchalantly saying "hey happy tuesday" Hours later I still hadn't answered so with that he then proceeded with a "how are you" I finally responded " I'm doing well, and you?" He said "I'm stressed" I didn't answer. A few hours later he showed up at my yoga class- naturally I was caught off guard but I definitely acted very off towards him and didn't go out of my way to make any conversation. After class he grabbed my wrist as I was talking with another guy and he said "hey thanks for class *insert my name*" and then was that.
what the fuck...
I know this may be difficult for you, but you need to muster the courage to cut him out of your life. At this point, he’s so comfortable with you always being there and reassuraning him that he does not even realize he is hurting you.
He seemed intrigued.I think he will continue to contact you.Just act the same you did last week (cool&collected), at this point he may either get the message and stop contacting you (& wasting your time) or he will try harder.
Posted by CreativeCapyes @OP, all this advice is good stuff - although it is difficult - perhaps he isn't in tune with what is actually going on emotionally within himself but you are - so just keep doing what you are doing and that is taking care of yourself and staying away from the pain of unrequited love
I know this may be difficult for you, but you need to muster the courage to cut him out of your life. At this point, he’s so comfortable with you always being there and reassuraning him that he does not even realize he is hurting you.
Posted by justlikeheavenof course he is intrigued - he was getting all of her attention and sex and all was well - now this is something different and he's trying to figure out what is going on - he sounds emotionally immature
He seemed intrigued.I think he will continue to contact you.Just act the same you did last week (cool&collected), at this point he may either get the message and stop contacting you (& wasting your time) or he will try harder.
but ultimately if the @OP doesn't want to wait for him to grow into himself which I don't blame her, they will both be in for some pain as they move on in different directions
Yea, I'm staying strong no contacting, being very dry when de does contact me.
He isn't in tune with his emotions, which is fine, but time apart should hopefully make him realize how he feels about me.
In the mean time, I'm moving on. If he makes adjustments and gives me more time and tries to get back into my life then I will give him another chance. Until then.... doing me 🙂
He isn't in tune with his emotions, which is fine, but time apart should hopefully make him realize how he feels about me.
In the mean time, I'm moving on. If he makes adjustments and gives me more time and tries to get back into my life then I will give him another chance. Until then.... doing me 🙂
Posted by RooSagicornI know Im late on this but I agree 100 percent with RooSagicorn.. Talking from experience. I went through the same thing with my Cappie fiance.. We started out as fwb and I started to want more but he didnt feel the same so he broke things off with me. I walked away completely (no communications whatsoever) then he came back only this time I broke things off with him cause he wouldnt commit.. Then he came back again a year later and on the second day of us being back together he finally committed himself to me and now were engaged.. You have to make them miss you and you have to be stern on what you want and NOT take anything less.. It worked for me and MAYBE it will work for you but that depends on if he really has feelings for you or not.. Hopefully this helps..
He doesn’t care enough. If he did, he wouldn’t want you to see others. So basically he just wants a casual thing because you’ve allowed it. He keeps limits to not allow you too close..
So question is what do you want? A casual thing or a relationship? Casual - well you’ve got it & continue on. If more, act like you want more and walk away. Leave the door open if you want in case your absence all of a sudden makes him realize what he really wants. It happens sometimes with Caps.
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He has always shown respect for me and seemed interested asking me about work ( I own my own business aside from teaching yoga) and asking me about things going on in my life and giving me his own personal suggestions and help in regards to work and day to day things.
I always made sure to compliment him to make it known how much I think the things he's insecure about are great and little things like that. He would open up to me about his stresses and I listened intently. Everything has been amazing and things have been going well- all of the signs that a capricorn man is interested have been there so I have stuck around because I really like the guy and I see us being more than what we are at the moment which I guess is dating or hooking up without any specific label...
Here's the thing- I finally was able to admit my feelings to him. He listened intently with eye contact the whole time and was so shocked that I liked him and kept saying that I shouldn't like him and that it hasn't been long enough yet for him to decide what he feels for me and for him to truly even know me. That concept is crazy to me bc i feel like I know everything about him!
He even admitted to keeping me at a distance (not talking for days, texting and making plans on his time...etc,.) because he is "being selfish and still working on his goals".
He then proceeded to say how much he cares for me and how he respects if I see other guys but he doesn't want what he have to end because he still needs to explore how he feels but also needs to work on his achievements.
Any capricorn men have any advice on what I should do next?
cut him off, see other people, ignore him on his next attempt to see me or actually keep it going with him and give him a chance to get to know me more.....? help!