STOP the Insanity!

Ladies... if you would like to continue any further discussions, I'd prefer to start over and do them here perhaps? I see little point in the attacks/counter-attacks going on w/in other threads.

I will second that!!! I just think there is alot of hurt going on...on both parties woman vs. Caprincorn gents. lets hugg and make up (((((hugg's))))Ill start first!!

love, GEG

p.s. I have not seen anything from mycap... i think we should all stop and say prayer for her broken heart!!

I would like to start the prayer!

Dear God,

Please bless CapGirl with a heart that doesn't break so easily Lord. Bless her with the strenght to get a hobby and stop having these love-hate relationship with men Lord. Let her see that the world doesn't revolve arould her Lord. Let her see that sometimes if you want to be recognized, you will sometimes have to first recognized. Let her see that if you want to be called, you will sometimes have to first call. Let her see that If you want to be loved, you will have to first love. Bless her with my word in Jesus name we pray...Amen!

That was a good prayer RIFF...I think that you could have left out " Let her see that the world doesn't revolve arould her Lord"! But if thats what you think she needed prayer for... And hope that you are being sinscere... You prayer is not a joking matter....

would you mind saying one for me to please?

love geg

******* WARNING: IF YOU ARE POSTING IN THIS THREAD, IGNORE THE TROLL (a/k/a RiffRaff)***************************************************************************************

GEG~ I would surely hope that she realizes this is not a break-up, in the typical sense of the word anyway. Being a Cap. myself, I have told my own Cap. that it wasn't going to work, and then reconsidered and backed off from that position. I feel bad that a couple people responded so harshly to her post. I try to understand the whole focus on work, etc. with these guys, but hell, it was Friday night, not Wed. at 2 am, so I don't understand his intolerance for a happy drunk call... although may not have the full story.

I'm a troll now? You beg me for advice all this time and now I am a troll? I told yall I don't get along with Capricorn women well.

Yes I undertand and the stuff that Brahn said was cruel and insensitive... As far as the call I have been in that exact postion once... I called when I was drunk not trying to make him jealous. But to tell him how much I missed him and how bad I wanted to see him, he was busy at the moment but i kept on and on. It made him angry because there was nothing that he could do and also there were people around that he did not want to hear our converation.. But I would not stop... so he hung up on me. But then when I was sober I realized that I WAS BEING ANNOYING!! I was drunk and wanted my baby who wouldnt... but the fact is I was not being respectful.

GEG, that's exactly how I was being. I was just drunk and all I wanted was to talk to him. I wasn't trying to be annoying, etc. See my friend answered the phone whenever he called me back and I was in the shower (drunk). She wouldn't let me talk to him for some damn reason and it made me mad. So I called him back after she hung up w/him, and that's when I didn't know what the hell was going on and he wasn't talking to me, he kept saying he had to go, I didn't know at the time if he was still working or what, so I kept on calling him because I thought he was mad, etc. If my friend would have handed me the phone when he called, all would have been well. But she didn't, I was drunk, that pissed me off, and it was all downhill from there.

Yes I did get bashed pretty hard by brahn. But it doesn't bother me, he's entitled to his own opinion, just as everyone else is.

CapGirl, You said u don't think it's a break up? Umm, I don't know about that. Just as I said in another post, he was still pretty upset on Sat.,but then yesterday was more calm, but never mentioned the incident, but didn't mention us not being broke up or him changing his mind either. So I don't know what's to come from him now, if anything at all. But I don't want to pick up the phone and call him and ask him because I still feel that it's too soon to bother him with it.

I wonder what your friend said to him while you were in the shower? Do you trust her with your life....you never know what the little "bird" could have told the "cock" to have his feathers ruffled...? I have some close friends and you would be surprised to hear some of the things that Brian told me they have told him...It hurt...but what can you do? you have to look out for you 🙂

love, GEG

lol the "chicken" should have been "c@ck" lol it was funnier that way!!😉

She wouldn't tell him much. She probably just told him I was in the shower, drunk off my @ss. Who knows. I still never asked her but I don't think she'd tell him much.

dont "think" she woudlnt you need to "know" girl!! I had a very close friend and i say close becasue we were friends for years since we were in the 7th grade!! I love her wiht all my heart but always felt she was kinda jealous of me... anyhoo one night when Brian and I were at a club and I walked away(bathroom break) she went up to him and told him that she tried to warn him that I was a B!tch and that I was obessive? WTF? this was over heard by one of my other close friends who later confirmed what I had heard from Brian. He also told me at antoher point one of her friends went up to him and told him do me (geg) a favor and leave me alone? Ill tell you what, I was livid but i did not say anything but Brian did not like her / trust her as one of my close friends after that...he told me to watch out and later much later some other stuff came up that only she had known about... just watch your self girl.. I thought I could trust her with my life....NEVER... I trust Brian A man I have known a year over a girlfriend i have had for 16 years!! thats sad...

and yet... i still forgave her...but the trust will NEVER be there again...sad but true!

love, GEG

Dang that's crazy. Well I know that she wouldn't say anything bad. He did tell her that he'd probably have to turn off his phone tho because Id probably be calling him. I seem to always want to talk to him when I drink. She agreed with him, but told him she'd try to take my phone away from me. That just made me angrier and want to call him more tho. It's sad that we can't even trust our best friends, isn't it

Oh, I know this "triangle" all too well and it pushed my Cap. relationship into a downward spiral, from which it has never completely recovered or been the same. This girl-friend of mine was the one who first met the Cap., liked him, and dragged me along to dinner w/ him. He never pursued her or liked her. Anyway, long-story short- she had no "game" whatsoever and screwed up mine w/ him, time and time again. Just "all mouth", telling him too much when I wasn't around. She's no longer a friend, for MANY other reasons.

You've got to keep your women friends away from your guy. They may not be jealous or truly trying to cause problems, but women tend to say too much or inappropriate things ("secrets revealed"), all of which can make the guy uncomfortable and feel that one or both of you are silly or that you're not to be trusted in any number of ways.

MyCap-- your friend indirectly made you look bad (immature, silly, "in love" like a schoolgirl) by telling him she'd take your phone away, etc., etc.

good point....also she should have NEVER answeard your phonr in the first place... You could have called him back your self when you got out of the shower...and at that time he would have found out from you that you maybe had to much to drink...and the story may have played out differently...anyhoo it is what it is but like capgirl said " You've got to keep your women friends away from your guy"!!!!

I hope things work out for the two of you... I would send him 1 txt that read " sorry for the immaturity on my part😉 that would be it... that way he knows that you reconize the problem. But after that nothing... if you cant send text then leave it as it is.... lots of love

GEG

Yeah she should have never answered my phone. She would have killed me if I would have done that to her. One time she got a phone call on her cell and she was in the other room and I almost answered it and she acted like it was a big deal. But she can go and answer my phone? Not right at all! It would have played out differently, without a doubt if she would have let me answer the phone or wouldn't have answwered it at all. Oh well, ur right, it is what it is now.

GEG, I did admit to him on Sat morn that it was immature, and what not, but it still didn't matter to him at the time. I still can't believe he ended it over that tho. I'm not going to send him a text or anything at this point. I'm just going to leave it alone, but still wondering what he's thinking or if he'll contact me or if he's expecting me to contact him. Just wondering tho, I won't do it.

I suspect that he will reach you when hes ready... Until then sweetie you are on the right track...no worries! Hand it over to GOD! Try not to count the minutes days and time like i do ....he he !! j/k im doing better!! love 2 you


Brandy

Thanks GEG. I'm trying to stay positive about this and not trying to get too upset or to miss him badly. Today he was off work, it was so hard not to pick up the phone and call him and want to meet and talk or what not. I wanted to so badly, but guess what, it's the end of the day, and I didn't do it, and I'm fine with it.

Time to pray again before I break down. I just miss him so much tho.

Funny you say that last night I had a "break down" I did not call him but the pain crept up on me when I was in the shower... After the feeling came back I was sitting in the shower with cold water pouring down on me.. I guess I needed a much needed melt down... lol.. you cant always be strong...I miss him sooo much its been 1 month 1 day..😢

love, GEG

I guess I must be crazy stubborn has hell because I do miss him but I can't for the life of me call him....I know it is my pride and ego...and today I was thinking about calling him but I said NO...I know he is having lunch at 12:30...and I was just going to call him and say Hi, how are you...have a good day and before he hangs up I was going to say "Hey I Still Love You" but I can't....LOL I just Can'" my azz is stubborn right know...or maybe this is my way of breaking down...I don't but I can't not let my guard right know since I have been doing so good..

GEG

Try your best not to count the days...I did not do that but I now I have not seen him since Dec 23...so you talking 30 day plus 10 days and only about 4 phone calls...LOL..go figure LOL

Dec. 23 was the last time that my baby and I were "together" and then later said he "did not feel it" the "connection".... funny he felt it an hour b-4 that? ohh well Im sure this all just a part of the healing.. I try not to count the days trust me..but he is never out of my thoughts no matter how busy I keep myself hes always in my heart.... like a leach....

Last night I decided to read men are from mars women are from venus... I love the part about the rubber band... I wonder how much he will stretch...before he comes sprining back? Im so sorry Im a sappy mess today...I just love him with all my heart!!! 😢 😢

Love, GEG

LMAO that was funny it is ok to be that way

I started to read that book when it first came out but it bore me to death...I can't really agree with all that the Dr. was saying about the way women should act and be towards men..I felt like the women was doing more submitting then the men....I guest I am being a chuvinist but hey I believe in 50/50 and sometimes 60/40, 70/30, 80/20 LOL...

I am going on my 4th book most of the books that I have been reading are really good page tuners...I have read

"Been there Done That"
God Don't Like Ugly
God Still Don't Like Ugly
My next book will be "Shiesty" and then I will read Church Folks etc..these type of books keeps me laughing and I feel good reading them.

I really don't want to read anything that has to do with Men and Women as far as them getting along right know, I guess this way he is not on my mind as much...because when I'm into a book I don't think about nothing else...especially if it is good.

He was supposed to come over last night well of course he did not that's why I was not excited or happy about hearing from him he was just calling to see if I would talk to him or if I was mad...I know he is just trying to build up some confidence to tell me how he feels..and I have to let him go through his motions right know and when he is ready I know he will tell me.

I rememeber when other people used to tell me about Caps and Scorps and they would say it is going to take a long time for use before we actually make it as a couple and know I understand. Oh Well

i have heard that same thing in reguards to gemini's lol

just feel as if i need to add something here, as much as I don't want to ,believe me, I hate to admit this or write it because it goes against everything i really WANT to believe, BUT, these guys who write in,such as branh whatever, who keep stressing how different guys are from us emotionally are I think correct. I will speak for myself after many experiences. There have been many times when I have felt sooooooooooooo emotionally and intimately connected with some guys, esp physically, when to them, yes...at the moment they felt it BUT as soon as it is over,either the moment or even the relationship, they are able to TOTALLY separate the two. For me it's been extremely difficult to accept this fact, and I will always say that there are exceptions, nothing is ever written in stone, but I have always been amazed at what was SUCH(at the time) an emotional exchange for both of us, could be so easily tucked away somewhere else in a male's mind. It's been a very hard thing for me to accept, but for the most part, they do seem able to completely compartmentalize the two things. Sex doesn't always mean lasting love. No matter how good or special. They are able to put is aside whereas we women have a much more difficult time doing that. At least I know I do.

point taken APW~
But what if you heard these words come out of his mouth "sex is an emotional connection between two people"? And he always comes back to you for that "connection"... I need to stop trying to analyze...lol argggg such a hard day..wonder what it is......

I know, I know....I've heard that before too and always been so amazed and hurt at how quickly they can sever that "emotional" connection. and i'm not just tallking about cap guys. I was deeply in love with someone a few years ago, it lasted almost 4 years, we were sooooooooooooooo in touch that way it was almost spiritual, seriously, it was amazing. and he did love me and i loved him and the first 2 1/2 years were incredible....then...some harsh realities crept in, and even though the sex was still phenomenal!! really, but...we had other issues, and the fighting started etc etc. He shut down like someone had nailed him shut, and he never came out again. and I was so totally blown away at how he could just "stop" the feelings, "stop" the intensity, "stop" the emotions. He told me, "I put them in a box and I'm not going to open it. I need to focus on other things, I never felt the emotional connection I had with you and I probably never will again" but this is how it has to be.
he called a couple times after that, you know, not wanting to let go of the connection completely, but then i just said don't ever call me again, I CANNOT be your friend. This was 5 years ago, and you know, to this day I have never felt like that again. Sad, very sad, but he was able to physically, mentally and emotionally shut down. And i've not kidding myself that he hasn't had sex or doesn't have anothr girlfriend, i think he does. all i know is that we DID have the whole package going (no pun intended guys) and when he needed to shut down HE SHUT DOWN and nothing that happened with us before mattered.
so all i'm saying and again, there are exceptions and I won't claim to know every guy's psyche, is that my experiences with guys is that they ARE able to separate the two much easier than most of us women.

APW....

You are so right...Before I met my Cappy I was single for a while..and I just used to date, I was not ready for a relationship so I made sure that I did not get emotionally envolved with any man. One of my ex girlfriends used to ask me how do you do that and I said easy, you just keep your emotions in tact. I know it is easier said than done..but I remember dating this one guy and he ask me was I just using him for sex and I said yea and he got mad and I was like I am sorry, and I never had a relationship with him although he finally stop coming to see me. LOL LOL LOL

I got the courage to do that when I read Iyanna Vazants book called "The Spritual Guidance of Men and the Women Who Love Them" that was one of the best books I have ever read. And in it I learned alot about men and my attitude became well hell if men can do it why can't women and I started doing it, it is basically a mind over matter thing don't allow yourself to have any feelings..again better said than done..I think it makes you a stronger person though

good for you..wish i could do that...tried it a couple of times, just didn't work for me...i cannot shut down the emotions, before i even sleep with someone i do need to at least like them, or chemistry whatever. and then once i do, as hard as i try not to feel emotionally connected, it happens, and that's when i get hurt. one time i was able to do it without any remote sort of feeling and when i got home one of my friends called and asked about it and I said "you know i may as well have just stayed home and done it myself and turned on the tv afterwards" and then HE kept calling wanting to go out and i was just so not interested in him at all, he was just a body and it really didn't satisfy me at all, and he wasn't bad looking or anything just didn't feel the chemistry as i said. so my friend was laughing saying how i acted "just like a guy" true, but for me, I just can't do it, as i said, may as well do it myself, more satisfying. But i think that's my point, I think most guys can do it that way, they can be intensely physically involved, and even at the time, TOTALLY BE THERE but then they can shut it off. I, unfortunately, can't, wish i could, would love to just do the booty calls when nature is calling, but that's what happened with my last cap, which inspired me to even approach these boards. He is just not at this time going to commit and i couldn't sleep with him knowing he was dating and possibly sleeping with other women. I just couldn't handle it emotionally, so here I am.

Well as you can see that my emotions are know in bloom also and I have to control them as I am doing know sometimes I wish that I did not let my emotions get involved but everthing happens for reason...but to make it so bad I was not even looking for a man when I met my cappy SUSPECT FROM THE DAY I MET HIM I should have stuck to my instincts....dang....I knew something was'nt right...must have been that dang smile that got me. LOL...

Did it not make you feel good that the guy keep calling? I be like dang this is what the other end feels like when the women is constantly call the guy. LOL and you just sit there and look at the number and keep going about your business....LOL..like the phone is not even ringing....LOL

LIFE....YOU GOTTA BE IN IT. IT WILL EITHER MAKE YOU OR BREAK YOU.

APW~~

I totally know where u r coming from. It sounds like u r describing me. I can do all that too. Not get emotionally involved after, then they keep calling, and Im not interested. It's always the ones that we r interested in that aren't interested in us for some reason. That's how I was with the cap. Well he could be interested, but he just has a few issues within himself. I honestly don't know how guys do that tho because it made me feel kind of bad to treat the guys like that. See me and my cap (well ex) had such amazing sex, such chemistry, I mean it was awesome, like none other. The best I ever had, anyways, but I always wondered after if he thought it was special or if he just let it go and said it was just sex. He admitted to me a couple weeks ago, that he did feel something and said it was the best he's ever had also. Women and men are definetely different in that regard, but some just don't know how much damage they really do to females. It sucks for us because we r more emotional people.

yes ladies, it does suck doesn't it...and to scorpian lady, yeah gotta admit it DID make me feel good but also sad, cause like you said, why is it the ones we DON'T want. and that's why i can't do the "just sex" thing because as i said, it's not even worth it if there's NO attraction and i don't mean they're bad looking, but it's some kind of unconsious chemistry or something. I mean the last guy(Cap) was not really all that good looking, there was just "something" and yes, the sex was amazing!! We clicked, really clicked, BUT as i said, he was also into "clicking" with other women, and I just couldn't be another name on his list. I know he liked me and I liked him, BUT when i found myself doing the "where is he, who's he out with, maybe he's with someone else, is he lying to me about what he's doing tonight" crap, i couldn't take it. I tried, I really did, went over one night had amazing sex, felt real good for about 2 days and then...starting obsessing, wondering and all that..till I laid it out on him, telling him that i wouldn't be just another name on the list, and how he was all over me with the calling, gestures etc till he "got" me and i don't even mean sexually, i mean he knew I really liked him. he shot back a really nasty email about never saying we were exclusive blah blah blah...so..again here I am...not calling, still wondering though, but have to do what's best for me...he's right, he didn't say we were exclusive...but I can't sleep with someone who's screwing other people, not just for safety reasons but for my emotional stuff. It hurts
So yeah we are very different than men and i don't think they even bother to try and think about the damage.

I don't think they bother thinking about it either.

APW~~ Ur scaring me still with how we are alike. My cap was the same way and he had me wondering where he was, who he was with etc, for so long, it sucked. It emotionally drained me and made me a mess. I was constantly worrying, with knots in my stomach for no reason. I don't know if he was messing around with others, I don't believe he was, but for some reason I thought he was. Cause if he could with me without being exclusive, then what was stopping him from doing the same with others. They are slick about those kinds of things. Also, I know what u mean about the hot guys. My cappy wasn't that hot, but I was attracted to him in more than one way. Other hot guys I couldnt be attracted to. It was the weirdest thing.

Mycap, yeah it's funny how much we feel the same. I don't know about you but I can say I am a very intuitive person, I always can feel when there's shadiness and sneakiness going on...now i'll try like hell to deny it but it's there and that's what causes the insecurity and knots. but then i'll pretend that it's all ok when i get the occasional crumb thrown my way. It's pathetic really, and I really want to stop, days ago i was talking about stopping the masochism, it really sucks. but i know when in my gut is the feeling i can't trust someone it's usually right. now the hard part is doing the right thing and stopping it. I put a lot on being trustworthy and i feel almost violated when i've been lied to...but i have to take responsibility here in that when i pretend to myself that someone can be trusted when i feel in my gut they can't and i do nothing about it, for instance, get the hell out cause i'm hoping that because i'm just so damn wonderful they're gonna all of a sudden see the light and come running, i'm the one who is wrong, for me i mean. I mean, this guy told me straight out that the reason his marriage ended was cause he cheated on his wife...for a year...now if that isn't the hugest red flag EVER ...BUT see I'm different and his ex-wifes a bitch and that's what i tell myself. Truth is his ex-wife is probably a fine person and maybe they were having some problems whatever, but the way to deal with that in a marriage i believe is to try and work them out if possible, not to go running to someone else for sex. So if he could lie to her for a year (and who knows how many other women there could have been) what would possibly make me think he could be truthful—?? see there's the responsibility i was talking about. THAT told me big time what he was all about. and i should be surprised that he was trolling around? Shame on me really for being a sap, so now along with his ex-wife who he says is a bitch I am probably on that bitch list too. and i just took a step here that i should've done 2 weeks ago. he keeps showing up on my buddy list and it drives me crazy. cause i know the routine, when he's "entertaining" he puts on his aol music on the computer for background music, and he's been on there all night. so i finally just f-ing deleted him cause it was just making me angrier and angrier. and Branh if you read all this, please be kind and don't start throwing abuse at us, we all make mistakes in areas of the heart. and we are NOT men, which is what this is all about and yes, our emotions get in the way.

Girl I get the feeling when something 'fishy' is going on with a guy too. I kept thinking that there was just something goin on, but tried to talk myself out of it, but everytime I tried to catch him i found out that he wasnt lying to me. so I really had no reason not to trust him.

I still don't understand why these cappy men have to be so dang difficult with everything. They are strange!

well i can't comment on your situation because everybodies is different, i really can only talk about mine, maybe your guy CAN be trusted, i truly don't know I just know that there were a couple guys who I knew couldn't and i went along anyway because of what we started talking about...the emotional side of sex...so I need to very careful really and stop lying to myself when these things happen, see the red flags, listen, really listen to what they're saying or not saying and not just thinking "but if they could be sooooooooo intimate with me there MUST be something there" that's what we were talking about messages ago, guys are different. They can make the most amazing love with us, and to us that's what it is but to them it's just good sex. and the more experience they have with it, just like us really, the better at it they are...so it IS really good in a lot of cases because they know just what to do, but whereas I make incredible love not just out of skill but because of feeling, i believe guys can do it without feeling, just skilled at it, so I feel we've really connected afterwards, they are probably just thinking "Wow she's a good lay"

Yeah I know what u mean.

sad huh? and we spend so much time thinking worrying wondering and they're thinking about changing the oil in their car...as much as I don't appreciate his cruel sadistic behavior, Branh is right about men for the most part, he really should be a little more gracious though in how he phrases things, at least publicly, he can think whatever he wants, but somebody said it on these boards...you don't know who you're dealing with or what mental state they might be in...

Ladies,

I must be honest with my self and that is why I am putting it out on this board...

Yesterday when I was talking about wanting to call my ex and I was fighting with my pride and my heart well my heart finally won after I call my friend and told her about me battling with myself and she said just call him and I was like My Pride won't let me I have been sitting at my desk for the last hour going back and forth call him...Hell No...Well I called him before I left work and where ever he was the service was not good...so I did not get a chance to talk to him but I was not going to call back either...(Major Pride and Ego Issues)

Well he must have saw my work number and this moring on my way to work my phone rang this was about 9am this morning so I answered it and it was him and the conversation went like this...

"Hello I said, he said Hey you called me yesterday and I said yea and he said what's up and I said I just called to say hi and to tell you that I still love you and he said oh yea and I said yea I might as well confess it know and then I said that was all and then I said have a nice day and he said you to...So of course I went back to my friend to tell her that I did finally call and she said good I told her what I said and she started laughing she was like you did ...She said that he was probably on the other end of the phone with a big smile..and that I made his day and that he will be thinking about me for the rest of the day.

She said that he was probably thinking that I did not love him anymore and that all the other women that he has dealt with has walk away, so in his mind he must have thought that I was really gone and did not love him and to tell him that I love him made him feel good. It made me feel good to get it out because I was really having a problem yesterday and I was kinda a shock because I was fine for such a long time not talking to him...I guess when he called me the other day as much as I tried not to show that it affected me it really did and I needed to deal with it.

I kinda now know what he is going through right know trying to decide whether he wants to be in a relationship or not because the battle that I took myself through was not an easy one trying to find the courage to do something.. So I am going to leave him alone and not call him for a while again because he know knows how I feel and I feel good getting it off my chest.

Ladies...ladies I love you I do... But where the hell is your strength? Of Course you put a smile on his face who doesnt like hearing they are loved. But the question here is how did you feel when he did not say it back? And how are you going to feel when he does not call.. Your going to have to start all over 😢 I'm sorry Im not trying to lash out Its just I have been there over and over...go back and read all my posts from months ago. It's only going to make it harder. You know what I had to realise? He knows I love him, he has heard the words out of my mouth, he has seen it in cards he KNOWS!! And I believe that when two people love each other you dont even have to speak the words...you already KNOW!!!!! MY baby has never said I LOVE YOU...he has said other things that have come close...but I know he does, by the electricity that is shared between us when we are even in the same room, by the look in his eyes and the most important HIS TOUCH! Ladies they know how you feel...

ANd if you are having doubts already that he may be cheating (when the two of you are together) ask your self this...Why should I even bother. No one should be worried about shady Business going on with the one they love...and if you are then "HES NOT THE ONE"!!

I have been through it all with Brian our story goes on and on...and he did lie to me once. A huge lie...but we were not together or seeing eachother and were NOT sleeping together. The situation hurt but the lie hurt the most. And the pain in his eyes and the tone in his voice when he appologized for hurting me told me he meant it and that he would NEVER lie again to me. When we were "seeing eachother" I have never thought for one moment that there was some one else or that he was creepin.. in my heart I knew he was eaither busy or having a moment a cappy moment. Ladies follow your heart it will guide you... and im not psychic but I KNOW when soemthing is not right its your gut listen to it!!


love to you

GEG

No hard feelings GEG but when I hung the phone up from him this morning I felt good real good...I know he knows I love him and I know he loves me but it was something that I needed to do for myself...I did not expect him to say it back...

I used to tell him I love him every day when I left him in the morning I did it strieght for about 2 or 3 months before we started having issues...I even asked him one day did it bother him to hear me say I love you and he said no. So for him not to say it back did not phase me..Hell I had to find the courage to actually tell him I Love him again and me doing that is what made me feel good about myself and after all that we have been going through to tell him that know was a big deal to me I was the one who broke it off and walk away not him but he did agree that it was a good thing to do because he did not have time for me so I believe it really did something for him also.

I have no need to pick the phone up and call him. I went 30+ days of not calling him so for me not to call him know is not such a big deal for me in the field of being strong I was'nt being strong when I was battling with my pride and my heart I was torturing myself yesterday and I needed to do something. Like I said It surprised me to be feeling that way when for the almost 2 months I have not called him. Trust me I am fine with it...It actually made me really happy today.

I know each one of us have a certain bond and friendship with our Cappy and that is fine but for me, we became friends best friends, good friends, and lovers we have a bond that I now is very deep I say that because we have also spent a lot of time communicating about life ourselves what we want, where we going etc. We have also shared a lot of secrets with and about ourselves...he has told me stuff he has never told anyone else whether it was the truth or not I believe it to be the truth and he did not to have to tell me something so secretive with him he is very unemotional and when I express to him a secret about me he was very compassionate.

And like I said previously this is actually the first time that we have been apart in this long in the year and half that I have known him...he has never really did the MIA treatment to me mainly because I was not really calling him like that when I first met him...Like I said one day he had to call me and say to me "A brother has to call to let you know I like you" so from then on I was never really calling him we have spent countless moments weeks and months together before this I knew he was working fulltime and partime so I would not call him alot..I knew when he was working and in the Zone as he would call it I knew better then to bother him..and he appreciated it went to some of his part-time jobs with him etc...I was his side kick actually he counted on me for a lot then which made our friendship even closer.

The bond that we have is to tight and we both no that. If I wanted to call him every day I know he will talk to me...he calls me back he returns all my phone calls right away...When I call him yesterday and did not call him back he did not have to call me I was not going to call him again but he did and I told him how I felt...and I believe that he truly heard me, he listens to me when I do talk to him know so for me not to call or hear his voice again is really and truly fine with me..

What we are going through right know is either going to make or break not only a relationship but also a friendship and I know he does not want to lose the friendship. IF he did he would not have kept calling me when I was not calling him.
classic sign of wanting to stay friends and keep in touch with me and I don't believe that it is for keeping me here for sex, he knows the sex is Awesome and I know he enjoys it. They are very pickey...and we it was just him and I believe me I now he wa not haveing sex with any one else I was with him entirely to much.

Hey... I'm trying to keep up here! Feeling a bit removed from the Cap. saga, as I've been tied up w/ family visiting. It's kind of nice though that I've had no time to think and obsess...wondering if I should just keep moving ahead w/o him? I feel like he and I are on an upswing though, and should hopefully see him soon, but then reading all of this... I remember how unstable and unpredictable these relationships seem to be!!

Yea... as to what SL just wrote... I told him "ILY" or "in love with you" and didn't care or expect to hear it back. And when I did... he was drunk, and words mean so little under those circumstances, that I wish he'd never said anything!

Glad to see the TROLL(s) are back under the bridge!! lol

I'm glad that we can talk and understand eachother Scorp... and here is the other thing Im a strong believer in following your heart and you instincts...And if you heart said to call then you most likley made the right decsion...I will keep you in my prayers...its sounds like you and your baby have/had a wonderful relationship and I hope nothing for the best for you.. I have had those moments when I just had to call and I did and he sounded happy to hear from me we had wonderful conversation and I could almost see his smile through his voice... It made me soooo happy but then after a few days I missed him bAAAD.. SO for me my decision is different now... I have to wait it out.. I know he loves me and I will wait for his return....

love to you

GEG

OK Here's something is has just tripped me out...I have a Capricorn Rising Sun...what the hell does that mean...

it means that you can understand him well 🙂 LOL
i have a capricorn moon ....lol

I knew it had to mean something..and that is probably whey I am just as stubborn as him... and what does the Cap moon means

you know im not sure hwat the exact meaning is for them but I use www.cafeastrology.com to guide me it tell what everything in chart mean and you can run a free birth report to find what you are made of.... its lots of fun but dont get to sucked in....its addicting lol

love to you
Good luck

LOvE GEG~

Ladies I believe that u should follow ur heart also, always. We know Or have an instinct of whether we should do something or not. I know down deep that if I knew without a doubt that me and my cappy would never work out, I would know and walk away. But i feel different than that tho. And just like last nite, for some reason I told myself to call him. I hadn't talk to him in a coupole of days (which isnt very long), but I just felt like picking up the phone and talking to him. It made me feel good also, but also made me miss him and wish I was with him. It's all about how each one of us can deal with things and how we think we should handle each situation. They are all different.

I guess you are right, they are all different but I gave up on my Cappy. I told him today i was going to delete from anything that had his name on it because I want to move on. But it hurts bad enough he's the father of my child.

You know, I've heard it said that people always want what they can't have.

IMHO, one of the best ways to get over a guy is to date another one or two or three... Whatever you can handle. And even though you may know this about yourself already, the new guys confirm that you are attractive, desirable, etc.

I know several of you ladies are doing or have done that -- date other guys in the interim, and no, it's not the same as with the guy you really love. But at least for the moment, you feel stronger and more in control of yourself and the situation.

If you are hurt, dating these "new" guys can add to your confidence and if you do want to keep calling the guy who broke your heart, you can do it with a different perspective and perhaps not so vulnerable to his reaction or lack of one.

It's not a game, it's just moving and not paralyzing yourself. Unless it is "totally" over with your ex, he will respect you even more for your "move on" attitude and self-respect, and probably start calling/coming around again.

I'll have to agree with pathfinder on this one, the starting to date other people. as much as I also agree with "going with your gut" sometimes i have twisted my gut knowing what i was doing, for example, calling the guy and having it make me feel better for a day or two, felt right at the time but would hurt me in the long run. I always say in these things we all have different situations and lives and people but i know for me that the cap guys i've been with were really not good for me. i guess i'm way too sensitive(no not needy) to bear with the games. the games these guys played WERE ego boosting games for them, scoping out other women, etc. and i was just one of the pieces in the game. a NICE piece, that's what they always said, "you're so nice" so for them it was just another ego feeding part of the game to KNOW that i was still there, ready willing and available at the drop of a hat to run to them if they wanted. Very self-destructive for me. so the dating other people does help even though it might not be as exciting or fun. I talk to my sister a lot and she always says "who knows what NICE guys you might have let go while you were obsessing over the s---heads." she speaks the truth, i haven't given other ones a chance while i was hoping that Mr Wonderful would come to his senses and swear undying love. The fact is for some of these guys, and it's not just caps, why should they change?? there's no reason to if what they're doing is working for them. The only hope for them to change is if by some magic everyone just tells them to go to hell. the sad fact is though is that they ARE charming and can probably just keep attracting new women over and over. They know how to play the game very well. I know this sounds very negative but i'm just trying to face reality. I'm wasting my life and love if i keep being attracted to these unavailable guys. For me, and I stress that, because for others of you it might not be the case, but for me I need to move on.