GEMINI GUYS - u like ATTENTION OR U like DISTANCE

Some articles say that - 'Gemini guys absolutely love attention but then you really have to be careful because their want for attention is a short time span as they are a flighty sign due to being an air star sign. They certainly will gain attention else where if they are not getting it from you and it will come as no problem to them getting the attention.'
In this forum I found people advising to maintain Distance with them if they are being aloof.. Not texting.. Not answering text and all.
It's so confusing. What you guys actually like... Attention or distance
!?

You know that feeling you had as a kid when you had sleepless nights about getting a certain toy and the excitement was gone soon after you finally got it?

Hello 🙂
I really need your help.. oppinion about something, because seriously i am going crazy thinking about that. So there is this guy and he is from Germany and I am from Bulgaria. We met while he was in my country roadtripping and since then we havent't stopped chatting. We got to know each other and maybe.. maybe have some feelings for each other. He said that he would come back this summer to Bulgaria to see me and we even made some plans. And everything was great, he was so lovable and sweet althought we are not like together officially. So he got back in Germany like 2 weeks ago and now he is working as a carpenter the whole day and when he gets home he is usually really tired and the first days were okay, we managed to communicate well when we had time. But now he gets home more tired and he either wants some time for himself.. you now watching football or tv or he is asleep and when we talk he is sleepy and not in a mood o talk let's say. Firstly I thought that there was something wrong and I asked him and he said no, that he is just tired and doesnt have much free time. He keeps saying that he can't wait to come to me and he misses me but I need more than words. I might have said something about going out with someone and I asked me what should I say to that someone as an answer and he said that it's up to me to decide. And since then he is acting really weird, more distant.. and I miss him a lot. He says that he is tired and i've heard that many times but he can always find some time to text me and say something if he wanted to. So he is Gemini with venus in cancer and I know that Gemini with Venus in Gemini are more distant.. i want to know is venus in Cancer makes difference, is he more loyal, serious and dedicated. He is also with moon in Leo, mercury in cancer, mars in taurus.
Sorry for the long and probably confusing message I just can't stop thinking about that and my thoughts are a mess. I would really appreciate if someone answers. Thank you 🙂

Flighty?
People assume too much.
Most men are after sex so I'm sorry if that was the case. 😢
Yes I like my space because I am disgusting, sometimes i just want to drink beer all day and watch porn for no reason...
How many girls are into that, most girls would be offended.
Sometimes i want to do stupid shit with my friends, I do know some guys that like do do everything with their girl but to honest they just don't have a lot of friends.

Again just because I like doing my own thing does not mean I don't care about someone.
How often do you spend time with your parents as an adult?

Once I use to see a girl that would criticize me for binge eating because it eating pizza all the time was disgusting so I would just have days where I would not text her and eat pizza, wings, a lot of pasta and go back to eating her vegan crap.
I made up some crap like i was mediating or something. LOL @hippy chicks.

Thanks to all for suggestions. I just want to add that... He is Gemini sun, Capricorn moon and cancer Venus. One day before he left v went to date. He told he had to stay in Australia for 3 weeks and then he will b back and he will b busy there with meetings. Before leaving I hugged him n said I would miss him
as he won't b here on his bday. He kissed my cheeks n said he would try to b back before that. Now after that he only messaged me to know if I reached safely home after the date. Next day I wished him safe journey n suggested him not to raise Australia temperature too much as it's already hot there! :-)
Since no reply... Now m confused.. Should I message or not. Attention or distance!??
And he is a mature Gemini . He wants to settle down and have kids

Hey, I apologize for sharing my problem here. I am new and got confused with all the topics and thought that we just share things. Anyway, sorry again 🙂
I also wanted to add that in my opinion this guys likes you, that's why you havent heard from him. Weird indeed. But when you said that he is mature and wants to settle... maybe he just knows that he can't have that with you and tries not to get more attached and you as well.
I have experience with other Gemini guys before and when they think that there is no point of dating you because of some their reasons even though they have feelings for you.. they just stop contacting you. Which is annoying, making the decision for both of you. But what can we do..

Well... I know u have a point but thing is v agreed that d moment v find out its not working anymore, we will let know each other. I was cool with it and v agreed to date for 5 months at least to see where it goes. If he really doesn't want to break up... Y did he get physical(foreplay only as v agreed on No sex too early) and he kissed my cheeks while leaving. Most importantly he knows watever is the decision from his side or my side... M cool with it as I told him... I don't want any problem after marriage n all.. So sooner v realise it's not working the better it will be. So y d hell he will b hesitating to Let me know if he doesn't want it!?

well people are complex... and a male gemini is very complex. Sometimes I think that even he doesn't understand himself but he will never show it because a gemini has to be in control and know everuthing, so he rushes into some decisions. And I think that the cancer Venus plays a big role here, I dont know his other planets and signs but it will take some time before he lets you get that close to them. Cancer lovers are extremely self-protective and even if they like you, they will wait until they feel safe and sure of your affection.As the Moon rules the sign of Cancer,their emotions swing back and forth just like the Moon??s phases.Also Cancer lovers are masters of the silent treatment. Sometimes their moodiness and overly self-protective feelings can become so extreme as to make it impossible to have a relationship with them and I think that you should show him more what you are feeling, Show him that you care about him and hopefully he will open his heart to you

I think both of you girls with the Gemini guys need to chill. You both met guys who were in your country who are now NOT in your country. Both are working & busy. Because you spent a little time together you're jumping the gun into full fledged serious relationships, one of you even brought up marriage. It doesn't sound like either one of you spent a whole lot of time together with these Gemini guys. Space, give them space. They like attention when they have time for attention. Gemini is an air sign.... can you tie a rope around air? No you can't. Don't smother them, don't pester them for a commitment before you even really know them well. Let them go & they'll probably come back. Or move on to people who are actually in your country that you can see on a more regular basis.

Thanks a lot dear. U know why I am putting so much effort to be together because I can see the restless child in him. One time playful... One time aloof. He lost his ex wife whom he loved deeply. He is hurt inside and I want to pacify his sadness with my affection. But overpouring of affection may backfire. So I don't overwhelm him with my messages. But at times I get confused when he doesn't reply me back. What do u think.. How long should I wait to message him again or just wait for his message!??

I am also an air sign and i need freedom as well. And I am giving him all the space he needs, I also encourage him to go out with his friends and have fun. i havent even talked with him about officially being together because i know that we are not from the same country and i dont want to demand anything at that point. I am not some control freak but i do need some certainty, because i care about him. I think that this other girl is kind of the same. But we are also women and we tend to overthink things and make them more complicated even if they are not. We dont choose who we meet and have feelings for, and i really hope that things would get better for that girl and the man she talked about.

We met at matrimony site, so of course marriage is d purpose v started dating. We both agreed to see how things work. I am not in hurry for marriage either as I don't wanna settle down with a wrong person who won't understand my love. I am giving him enough space.... I wished him safe journey in message... That's it. No more messages from my side. I am confused because some of u geminis tell that u get aloof to test our affection and u really like to hear from us. There are also some others who say make distance... Be unavailable... Geminis like challenge... If v will b unavailable... They will be back. Please take note his sun sign may be Gemini.. Buy moon is Capricorn and Venus cancer. I am really seeking genuine advice.

Thanks for a straight answer. U r a sweet heart.

Here's some more advice... Gemini's like mental stimulation so here is a question to ask yourself... Do you have interesting things to say when you talk? Or is it just general "how's the weather?" type of conversation. I am in no hurry to talk to anyone who doesn't spark my interest. I don't do small talk. That's boring to me. I still suggest that you let them contact you, don't send multiple unanswered messages. That just makes me not want to answer the message. When/if they do message you back, stay away from general small talk. There are thousands of things to talk about so have a few topic of conversations ready to talk about & ask them for their opinions or experiences. But make sure that you have opinions of your own.

@Gem87 yes, you are right. thank you 🙂
@theblueseagull85 I do think that venus in cancer makes differenceq I told u in one of my previous messages what i know about this combination. But of course he is not just venus in cancer and I agree with Gem87 not to message him all the time, but not not at all because sometimes all someone needs is to know that someone cares about him. Of course u know him better and what we say are just personal opinions and people are different. My best friend always advises me not to show that i care and keep my distance. But u know better, because it's ypur situation, so keep in mind what we said so far but it's your decision to make at the end 🙂 best of luck