librababy
@librababy
14 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 4 · Topics: 1
Long story, but well worth the read. I need help.
to another city for school.. and he saw my picture on facebook.. and started messaging me.. we started talking every day by txts and on facebook.. and our spark had always been un deniable.. we'd start texting at 12pm and finish at 4 am in the morning.. just about random stuff, bullshit really.. we started talking more and more, and then we got in a "stupid" argument.. stopped talking for 3-4 months.. then started talking again.. got in a stupid "argument" again.. then stopped talking for 3-4 months.. then got in a stupid arugment again.. then started talking again after 3-4 months.. whatever it was, it got to a point where he told me he cared about me, and when i would say something like "oh, i love to cook".. hes like oh i love girls who can cook.. and he would always tell me he wants to be in a serious relationship.. he wants a wifey.. he told me i was wifey material.. but then he would be a total jackass to me.. we hung out only 2 times in november outside of work.. we made out thats it (lost in tranlation type feeling.. it was amazing).. and after that he started calling me for the stupidest reasons.. like how much does this perfume cost LMAO.. but then i called him out on it.. and i guess i made him feel embarassed for doing that.. anyways we got in another fight, and stopped talking again for about 6 months, and started talking again in april.. we started talking about serious things (hes one of those guys who doesn't talk about his feelings).. so he said "what, you're gunna tell you're parents we're fuckin?).. first of all he knows im not an easy girl, because i didnt give it up to him when we hung out in november.. so i think it was his way of bringing up the subject of how we are gunna tell my parents we are into each other.. and i said "i'm not even thinking about the future".. a week later he started being an asshole to me again and we haven't been talking normally since...
what the heck is this?.. we have an insane connection.. i feel we are the same person.. do you think we're into each other.. or this is some random waste of time thing—
what the heck is this?.. we have an insane connection.. i feel we are the same person.. do you think we're into each other.. or this is some random waste of time thing—
he also told me some personal stuff about his family..
not even gonna lie, this is a weird ass story haha. you're gem doesn't sound very kind in relationships from what i read. i do think that you guys are good for each other tho, and i dont think its a waste of time at all.
PERSONALLY, if i revealed to you the insane bullshit that life has thrown at ME, then that means i trust you beyond belief, and that is saying ALOT..there is definately a strong bond there..so take that for what it is..
Posted by librababy
he also told me some personal stuff about his family..
PERSONALLY, if i revealed to you the insane bullshit that life has thrown at ME, then that means i trust you beyond belief, and that is saying ALOT..there is definately a strong bond there..so take that for what it is..
first of all, thanks soo much for taking the time out to read this 🙂.. i really really appreciate it.. it feels nice getting unbiased opinions from people because i feel like those are usually the best..
there is so much more in this story, it could go on for 10 pages.. i feel as if this gem in particular is even taking time to come back to me after the fights.. thats an automatic sign of like right there, my parents love him, my brother loves him (professionally, they think he's a great employee lol).. the thing is a couple months back he quit.. we started talking again and he came back..
i come from an indian (from india) background, and my parents are pretty traditional and have high expectations for me in terms of career and person i'm going to marry.. this shit is sooooooooooo complicated beyond belief.. i'm so scared i'm falling in love with him.. it's bad.
he is still pretty secretive, but i find that he will randomly talk about real heartfelt shit in the middle of a random ass conversation we're having..
why do you think we're good for each other.. what do you think is going on with us—
there is so much more in this story, it could go on for 10 pages.. i feel as if this gem in particular is even taking time to come back to me after the fights.. thats an automatic sign of like right there, my parents love him, my brother loves him (professionally, they think he's a great employee lol).. the thing is a couple months back he quit.. we started talking again and he came back..
i come from an indian (from india) background, and my parents are pretty traditional and have high expectations for me in terms of career and person i'm going to marry.. this shit is sooooooooooo complicated beyond belief.. i'm so scared i'm falling in love with him.. it's bad.
he is still pretty secretive, but i find that he will randomly talk about real heartfelt shit in the middle of a random ass conversation we're having..
why do you think we're good for each other.. what do you think is going on with us—
why are you scared of falling in love with him...is this more of a one-sided love relationship? well im not sure why you guys are good for each other cuz idk you guys, but you're guy has the same birthday as me so astrology wise we're pretty similar, and i think that the reason is hes 'randomly talking about heartfelt shit' is because he does really trust and love you, but he's just bad at going through the whole self expression part, or he might just be uncomfortable with himself.
as for what you first posted... sounds like he doesn't handle rejection well and looks like he's trying to beat you to the punch line. imo, anyway. i'm not saying that you are rejecting him but, he seems to think you might and that's all that matters. it's a defense mechanism that is triggered automatically at even the most minute possible sign of rejection. he needs encouragement to know that you aren't going to reject him. but you will have to prove this with actions as well. if it doesn't match up, he won't believe you.
as for the rest. if he's telling you personal things about his family = he trusts you with that part of his life. and that's a good thing. he keeps coming back after arguments cuz he does like you. he will get to a point where he will realize that the possible rejection was all in his head. at least that's what it sounds like to me. sounds like he really wants to be with you.
sometimes gems just react instead of thinking it through first. based on emotion rather than logic. sounds like he needs to find some balance between the two. i'll be the first to say it. sometimes we over analyze. i'm going through this right now. i also share the same birthday and am trying to find some balance...
just love him... you will never know what could be if you don't at least try. 🙂
as for the rest. if he's telling you personal things about his family = he trusts you with that part of his life. and that's a good thing. he keeps coming back after arguments cuz he does like you. he will get to a point where he will realize that the possible rejection was all in his head. at least that's what it sounds like to me. sounds like he really wants to be with you.
sometimes gems just react instead of thinking it through first. based on emotion rather than logic. sounds like he needs to find some balance between the two. i'll be the first to say it. sometimes we over analyze. i'm going through this right now. i also share the same birthday and am trying to find some balance...
just love him... you will never know what could be if you don't at least try. 🙂
misslissa pointed out a interesting point: rejection.im not a gemini but my bf is and i think im just starting to really get him..and his gemini ways.
one thing is for sure..he doesn't do well with rejection. he doesn't respond in such a douche outwardly manner but his actions speak thousands.
1) i push him away when he wants to have intimate time with me (sexually) then he just stops trying all together. where as other men would just keep going to turn me on. he jsut stops. not in the way of respect just stops. over months he doesn't know when to approach me. he said it himself.
2) with rejection my bf..would pretend he doesn't care and play the game 2x hard. i would be preoccupied with something and cannot see him..he'll start to text random things to find out what is going on (how is it going? what ar eyou doing? did you know so and so died (current events) call me during my time with my friends. Then he would then act like a schmuck when i ask him out."i miss you so much today when can we see each other again? can i come over now?"
he would simply say "we'll see not sure what im up to you yet. but you can if you want..." rather than open arms welcoming that he usually gives.
3) In the early stages of our dating..he wouldn't take my rejections (though i object to that word)very gracefully...he started to flirt and try to date other women. this frustrated me but i trusted his "EYES" when he said he liked me..something else made me just jump off that cliff and love and be loved by him.that he defied all logic and reason. Later on...couple months after a huge fight he finally disclosed that he did those things because he wasn't sure he even REALLY had me exclusively or that i would just leave. Due to this rejection defense mechanism he made me not trust him fully. So instead of being honest from the get go of his feelings..he went to find a side girl to make himself feel better. HE DIDN"T EVEN MEET UP WITH THEM. he just wanted to see if they would be there at his disposal. BUT i am forever his main girl and forever doesnt exist but for a short day he will feel like its forever!
and your job is to be consistent with who you are with him...so he can be consist. The thing i found with gemini's is they keep their observations and certain opinnions to themselves..so if he has a idea of you in his head and because of this drama you are not acting yourself he would take that new observation and validate his point..hence sorta self inflicting y
one thing is for sure..he doesn't do well with rejection. he doesn't respond in such a douche outwardly manner but his actions speak thousands.
1) i push him away when he wants to have intimate time with me (sexually) then he just stops trying all together. where as other men would just keep going to turn me on. he jsut stops. not in the way of respect just stops. over months he doesn't know when to approach me. he said it himself.
2) with rejection my bf..would pretend he doesn't care and play the game 2x hard. i would be preoccupied with something and cannot see him..he'll start to text random things to find out what is going on (how is it going? what ar eyou doing? did you know so and so died (current events) call me during my time with my friends. Then he would then act like a schmuck when i ask him out."i miss you so much today when can we see each other again? can i come over now?"
he would simply say "we'll see not sure what im up to you yet. but you can if you want..." rather than open arms welcoming that he usually gives.
3) In the early stages of our dating..he wouldn't take my rejections (though i object to that word)very gracefully...he started to flirt and try to date other women. this frustrated me but i trusted his "EYES" when he said he liked me..something else made me just jump off that cliff and love and be loved by him.that he defied all logic and reason. Later on...couple months after a huge fight he finally disclosed that he did those things because he wasn't sure he even REALLY had me exclusively or that i would just leave. Due to this rejection defense mechanism he made me not trust him fully. So instead of being honest from the get go of his feelings..he went to find a side girl to make himself feel better. HE DIDN"T EVEN MEET UP WITH THEM. he just wanted to see if they would be there at his disposal. BUT i am forever his main girl and forever doesnt exist but for a short day he will feel like its forever!
and your job is to be consistent with who you are with him...so he can be consist. The thing i found with gemini's is they keep their observations and certain opinnions to themselves..so if he has a idea of you in his head and because of this drama you are not acting yourself he would take that new observation and validate his point..hence sorta self inflicting y
yourself girly
but! if you still be yourself...fun loving, adventurous, agree to disagree mentality, easy going, adaptable it would seep through his illogical idealogies of you. but don't prove him right. be you!
when you text him...
don't be so serious break the ice. even if he ignores you (not intentionally) he just has so much things to do and people to see. He needs to see you can hang with his moods! don't let him slip away 🙂
ask him out on a date. go do something fun. suprise him and act liek nothing happens.
that is key first..and if the conversation happens to occur about the past drama. open yourself up completely and he'll do the same 🙂
gL!
but! if you still be yourself...fun loving, adventurous, agree to disagree mentality, easy going, adaptable it would seep through his illogical idealogies of you. but don't prove him right. be you!
when you text him...
don't be so serious break the ice. even if he ignores you (not intentionally) he just has so much things to do and people to see. He needs to see you can hang with his moods! don't let him slip away 🙂
ask him out on a date. go do something fun. suprise him and act liek nothing happens.
that is key first..and if the conversation happens to occur about the past drama. open yourself up completely and he'll do the same 🙂
gL!
Posted by librababy
what the heck is this?.. we have an insane connection.. i feel we are the same person.. do you think we're into each other.. or this is some random waste of time thing—
If U did have a connection with him it may B gone and if the 2 of U talk again the
connection may not B as strong as it was before!!!
Posted by librababy
we started talking every day by txts and on facebook.. and our spark had always been un deniable.. we'd start texting at 12pm and finish at 4 am in the morning.. just about random stuff, bullshit really.. we started talking more and more, and then we got in a "stupid" argument.. stopped talking for 3-4 months.. then started talking again.. got in a stupid "argument" again.. then stopped talking for 3-4 months.. then got in a stupid arugment again.. then started talking again after 3-4 months.. whatever it was, it got to a point where he told me he cared about me, and when i would say something like "oh, i love to cook".. hes like oh i love girls who can cook.. and he would always tell me he wants to be in a serious relationship.. he wants a wifey.. he told me i was wifey material.. but then he would be a total jackass to me.click to expand
From what i'm reading this GEM cared for U back in 2007 but what i didn't see in you're story is that not 1 time did U mention that U cared about him. by U not responding and saying i care about U 2 i think took him back a bit and this is what made his attitude change about U. This guy was given U hits but U chose 2 ignore them, Another point that
caught my eyes is that U were calling this GEM a jackass and marker but U were 2 blind 2 check you're on
actions.
Both of U should step back and think about what U were arguing about. Something else i noticed u said he didn't like talking about his feelings...how can that B this man told U he cared about U, I won't speak for other GEM'S but for me i can sense fakeness before U can even speak so when a female start's 2 play GAMES i will play them also because i know what she's up 2 and when that happens she start's 2 blame who? Yes the GEM of course. Keep in mind all this is only my opinion but 2 tell U the truth if i were him i would go my on way.
Posted by misslissa
as for what you first posted... sounds like he doesn't handle rejection well and looks like he's trying to beat you to the punch line. imo, anyway. i'm not saying that you are rejecting him but, he seems to think you might and that's all that matters. it's a defense mechanism that is triggered automatically at even the most minute possible sign of rejection. he needs encouragement to know that you aren't going to reject him. but you will have to prove this with actions as well. if it doesn't match up, he won't believe you.
as for the rest. if he's telling you personal things about his family = he trusts you with that part of his life. and that's a good thing. he keeps coming back after arguments cuz he does like you. he will get to a point where he will realize that the possible rejection was all in his head. at least that's what it sounds like to me. sounds like he really wants to be with you.
sometimes gems just react instead of thinking it through first. based on emotion rather than logic. sounds like he needs to find some balance between the two. i'll be the first to say it. sometimes we over analyze. i'm going through this right now. i also share the same birthday and am trying to find some balance...
just love him... you will never know what could be if you don't at least try. 🙂
YOU'RE TEARING ME APART MISSLISA!
ummm, okay... but, i probably would have heard you just fine if you typed in your normal voice. no need to yell that loud. 🙂
Do you understand life?
Do you?
Do you?
that is a question that i cannot answer with great accuracy until i'm dead. and that's not even an accurate statement based on the fact that we don't even know what's on the other side. could be something... could be nothing.
and it also depends on "who's" life. understanding just "life" is such a general thing seeing we all have our own.
and it also depends on "who's" life. understanding just "life" is such a general thing seeing we all have our own.
You are part of my life. You are everything.
I could not go on without you, Lisa!
I could not go on without you, Lisa!
well, umm, i guess, thank you. i don't know you but, that's very sweet of you to say. even tho you keep calling me Lisa... it's MissLissa. 🙂
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