mirror

my gemini guy friend is running hot and cold on me,so it goes like this.we would laugh.argue and talk for hours and then he would withdraw. since im a gemini woman i have my pride .when he doesnt talk to me i dont talk to him but at first i made effort now i dont.so when this happen he would stare from a distance and would wait for my reaction. what i would do is keep on busy and talk to other people and he does the same but he doesnt like it if im talkin to another guy.at this point i dont know what to do anymore.keep talking or stop.because we got into this vicious circle.what should i do?

Just admit you like him

Posted by nats
Just admit you like him

what do u mean by this? And how is it helping?

Be direct and communicate.

Posted by gemguyaz34
Be direct and communicate.

I dont know how to communicate with him.because now we are not speaking to each other.i gave him the silent treatment after he didnt talk to me or greet me

now he s waiting for what im gonna do and im doing the same.i dont know how to get out of this situation.

Im starting to think that there wasnt any friendship between us to begin with.

And i admit that it hurts but like i said i have my ego.

How long do you two normally stop talking for?

Posted by pinkbird03
How long do you two normally stop talking for?

Well it just happen sometimes .some days of the week we dont work the same shifts so if im working the morning sometimes he would greet other people and not me.and afterwards he would talk normally .my issue is not because he doesnt greet me but the fact that he said we were friends and close but its not the case he acts differently than he says.maybe i have my part in this since im gemini we dont look for attention it comes to us.so the fact that i talk to more guys now he might feel left out or that i got bored with him.or jealous because he acts weirdly when im talking to a particular one.so now i dont know how to fix this.since we mirror each other im afraid we pushed each other away

Are you interested in him? Have you guys hooked up? This sounds like you want more then friendship.? I just know with my current Gem I had to swallow my pride and ego and just go after him to get what I wanted . It was an inner battle I tell ya lol

Can you describe your friendship with him? Did you meet doing a hobby or interest that you both share?

Sometimes women friend zone guys who approach them for more. It's not a real friendship though. And eventually he'll ghost once it's apparent he's not gonna get the pussy...

Posted by Moonbutter
Are you interested in him? Have you guys hooked up? This sounds like you want more then friendship.? I just know with my current Gem I had to swallow my pride and ego and just go after him to get what I wanted . It was an inner battle I tell ya lol

This concept is lost in women because everyone want to be independent from men/love...and at the same time women are too proud to give in but too weak to let him GO if they don't like the treatment!

I say you would give OP a big favor explaining HOW did you swallow your pride and ego and won at the end by showing your feminine qualities.

Though by any means I believe it will help - it might give her some eye opening idea on how to be a woman and keep the man!

❤️

Posted by lilyofthevalley987

Posted by pinkbird03
How long do you two normally stop talking for?

Well it just happen sometimes .some days of the week we dont work the same shifts so if im working the morning sometimes he would greet other people and not me.and afterwards he would talk normally .my issue is not because he doesnt greet me but the fact that he said we were friends and close but its not the case he acts differently than he says.maybe i have my part in this since im gemini we dont look for attention it comes to us.so the fact that i talk to more guys now he might feel left out or that i got bored with him.or jealous because he acts weirdly when im talking to a particular one.so now i dont know how to fix this.since we mirror each other im afraid we pushed each other away

click to expand

Maybe stop mirroring him? Do what u want to do... if that's talk to him or hang out with him, just do it. U be the leader

Posted by Moonbutter
Are you interested in him? Have you guys hooked up? This sounds like you want more then friendship.? I just know with my current Gem I had to swallow my pride and ego and just go after him to get what I wanted . It was an inner battle I tell ya lol

So what you are saying is that i should let him talk to me when he wants and i m the one who should swallow her pride and doing all the effort?

Posted by LadyNeptune
Can you describe your friendship with him? Did you meet doing a hobby or interest that you both share?

Sometimes women friend zone guys who approach them for more. It's not a real friendship though. And eventually he'll ghost once it's apparent he's not gonna get the pussy...

Well i dont really know how to describe.from the first day we met we clicked.we used to laugh and talk alot the last few months we didnt talk much.i had a problem at work and he stood by me

Posted by lilyofthevalley987

Posted by LadyNeptune
Can you describe your friendship with him? Did you meet doing a hobby or interest that you both share?

Sometimes women friend zone guys who approach them for more. It's not a real friendship though. And eventually he'll ghost once it's apparent he's not gonna get the pussy...

Well i dont really know how to describe.from the first day we met we clicked.we used to laugh and talk alot the last few months we didnt talk much.i had a problem at work and he stood by me

click to expand

So he's your coworker??

Posted by lilyofthevalley987

Posted by Moonbutter
Are you interested in him? Have you guys hooked up? This sounds like you want more then friendship.? I just know with my current Gem I had to swallow my pride and ego and just go after him to get what I wanted . It was an inner battle I tell ya lol

So what you are saying is that i should let him talk to me when he wants and i m the one who should swallow her pride and doing all the effort?

click to expand

No, you took that completely defensively I'm simply saying be bold and trust in your instincts... does he like you or not.... then proceed to take a risk.

Posted by Gemitati

Posted by Moonbutter
Are you interested in him? Have you guys hooked up? This sounds like you want more then friendship.? I just know with my current Gem I had to swallow my pride and ego and just go after him to get what I wanted . It was an inner battle I tell ya lol

This concept is lost in women because everyone want to be independent from men/love...and at the same time women are too proud to give in but too weak to let him GO if they don't like the treatment!

I say you would give OP a big favor explaining HOW did you swallow your pride and ego and won at the end by showing your feminine qualities.

Though by any means I believe it will help - it might give her some eye opening idea on how to be a woman and keep the man!

❤️

click to expand

Ahh good point! Well it's quite similar to OP in a way because we are co- workers too. And yes, did the whole mirror thing and crab dance lol. Anyway, instead of just waiting on him I would text but then he would tease and i was confused ??‍♀️ anyway, I offered to do something nice for him and he softened toward me that was one break through lol I would bring him snacks , etc... showed him I'm sweet which he really likes.

Posted by Moonbutter

Posted by Gemitati

Posted by Moonbutter
Are you interested in him? Have you guys hooked up? This sounds like you want more then friendship.? I just know with my current Gem I had to swallow my pride and ego and just go after him to get what I wanted . It was an inner battle I tell ya lol

This concept is lost in women because everyone want to be independent from men/love...and at the same time women are too proud to give in but too weak to let him GO if they don't like the treatment!

I say you would give OP a big favor explaining HOW did you swallow your pride and ego and won at the end by showing your feminine qualities.

Though by any means I believe it will help - it might give her some eye opening idea on how to be a woman and keep the man!

❤️

Ahh good point! Well it's quite similar to OP in a way because we are co- workers too. And yes, did the whole mirror thing and crab dance lol. Anyway, instead of just waiting on him I would text but then he would tease and i was confused ??‍♀️ anyway, I offered to do something nice for him and he softened toward me that was one break through lol I would bring him snacks , etc... showed him I'm sweet which he really likes.

click to expand

Also, he did say he found my persistence attractive... so you may need to chase him a lil ... depends his placements. Mine has Venus Cancer so I figured I would need to chase a bit ?

Posted by Moonbutter

Posted by lilyofthevalley987

Posted by Moonbutter
Are you interested in him? Have you guys hooked up? This sounds like you want more then friendship.? I just know with my current Gem I had to swallow my pride and ego and just go after him to get what I wanted . It was an inner battle I tell ya lol

So what you are saying is that i should let him talk to me when he wants and i m the one who should swallow her pride and doing all the effort?

No, you took that completely defensively I'm simply saying be bold and trust in your instincts... does he like you or not.... then proceed to take a risk.

click to expand

thank you but I didnt take it defensively.i was just trying to understand.the thing is that now he stares like he doesnt get why we are not talking and wouldnt make a move to understand or ask what is going on.

Posted by Moonbutter

Posted by Moonbutter

Posted by Gemitati

Posted by Moonbutter
Are you interested in him? Have you guys hooked up? This sounds like you want more then friendship.? I just know with my current Gem I had to swallow my pride and ego and just go after him to get what I wanted . It was an inner battle I tell ya lol

This concept is lost in women because everyone want to be independent from men/love...and at the same time women are too proud to give in but too weak to let him GO if they don't like the treatment!

I say you would give OP a big favor explaining HOW did you swallow your pride and ego and won at the end by showing your feminine qualities.

Though by any means I believe it will help - it might give her some eye opening idea on how to be a woman and keep the man!

❤️

Ahh good point! Well it's quite similar to OP in a way because we are co- workers too. And yes, did the whole mirror thing and crab dance lol. Anyway, instead of just waiting on him I would text but then he would tease and i was confused ??‍♀️ anyway, I offered to do something nice for him and he softened toward me that was one break through lol I would bring him snacks , etc... showed him I'm sweet which he really likes.

Also, he did say he found my persistence attractive... so you may need to chase him a lil ... depends his placements. Mine has Venus Cancer so I figured I would need to chase a bit ?

click to expand

Well he has venus in gemini so mental stimulation and humor gets to him

Hey, girl! I totally get what you mean! You used the word "ego", but I'm a Leo, so I'll rather stick with "pride". A gem guy I now know for 5 - 6 months, Mr. Excuses, does something similar to me even though it's kinda LDR. No sex, no relationship label yet, he admits he loves me but he also says that I should not assume that he loves me. Yeah, seems like a total nutcase, but he frames those sentences trickily (and I enjoy returning his trickiness to him, that's another story.).

Irrespective of what relationship it is (friendship or something more), I understand the "hot and cold" very well maybe because Leo and gem (You and I) share a lot of similarities? Yep, he used to go (and still does) into super flattery mode like nobody else can and make me feel awesome only to go totally cold the next day! From here, two ways - 1) when I used to end the silent treatment and begin the talk, he'd act like nothing was ever wrong knowing very well I'm not happy and continue to go attend to his family and friends, or 2) I'd stick to my "pride" and either not talk or give him a loud roar telling "this is it! I'm leaving!" and he'd come back crawling putting up a very good apologetic act - and if and when I accept his apologies, his "hot and cold" next episode begins!

I don't know your level of anger, but I get super angry (I love my anger, lol) and these days, I'm NOT going to him. I decided to give him a mix of his tricks plus my strengths. Yep, when he comes back, I'd act like nothing was ever wrong, tell him honestly about all the other men that contacted me (let him fume secretly, who cares!), and he has only a few options: either to walk out of my life completely (which I know he can't - we really like each other), or keep crawling back to me and apologising (who's ever heard of a Leo apologizing for someone else's faults?), or just stay in my life and listen to me telling him the truth about how many other men express their interests for me, or finally learn to grow up and treat a woman like she deserves to be treated (which he's slowly learning).

Either they come or they go. You don't have to be cold when he comes to you, but don't go first either. You don't want to keep feeding his ego! We Leos love all our loved ones deeply, but Pride first. This pride kinda acts like a filter - guess you get my point. Good luck! 🙂

Posted by InLoveWithLife
Hey, girl! I totally get what you mean! You used the word "ego", but I'm a Leo, so I'll rather stick with "pride". A gem guy I now know for 5 - 6 months, Mr. Excuses, does something similar to me even though it's kinda LDR. No sex, no relationship label yet, he admits he loves me but he also says that I should not assume that he loves me. Yeah, seems like a total nutcase, but he frames those sentences trickily (and I enjoy returning his trickiness to him, that's another story.).

Irrespective of what relationship it is (friendship or something more), I understand the "hot and cold" very well maybe because Leo and gem (You and I) share a lot of similarities? Yep, he used to go (and still does) into super flattery mode like nobody else can and make me feel awesome only to go totally cold the next day! From here, two ways - 1) when I used to end the silent treatment and begin the talk, he'd act like nothing was ever wrong knowing very well I'm not happy and continue to go attend to his family and friends, or 2) I'd stick to my "pride" and either not talk or give him a loud roar telling "this is it! I'm leaving!" and he'd come back crawling putting up a very good apologetic act - and if and when I accept his apologies, his "hot and cold" next episode begins!

I don't know your level of anger, but I get super angry (I love my anger, lol) and these days, I'm NOT going to him. I decided to give him a mix of his tricks plus my strengths. Yep, when he comes back, I'd act like nothing was ever wrong, tell him honestly about all the other men that contacted me (let him fume secretly, who cares!), and he has only a few options: either to walk out of my life completely (which I know he can't - we really like each other), or keep crawling back to me and apologising (who's ever heard of a Leo apologizing for someone else's faults?), or just stay in my life and listen to me telling him the truth about how many other men express their interests for me, or finally learn to grow up and treat a woman like she deserves to be treated (which he's slowly learning).

Either they come or they go. You don't have to be cold when he comes to you, but don't go first either. You don't want to keep feeding his ego! We Leos love all our loved ones deeply, but Pride first. This pride kinda acts like a filter - guess you get my point. Good luck! 🙂

Thank you .my anger ia because like u said hed act all innocent like he doesnt do wrong so he ll either convince me im imagining things or that i misunderstood.i mean i think he likes me since he would be all over me if im giving more attention to other guys or would stare daggers at me and act cold.this behavior wasnt there in the beginning until our company hired new people and the dudes that i socialize with are cool amd friendly so he might think i dont care about him anymore and the head games began...the funny thing is that i can read him like a book its like my flaws and qualities are reflected at me

Posted by lilyofthevalley987

Posted by InLoveWithLife
Hey, girl! I totally get what you mean! You used the word "ego", but I'm a Leo, so I'll rather stick with "pride". A gem guy I now know for 5 - 6 months, Mr. Excuses, does something similar to me even though it's kinda LDR. No sex, no relationship label yet, he admits he loves me but he also says that I should not assume that he loves me. Yeah, seems like a total nutcase, but he frames those sentences trickily (and I enjoy returning his trickiness to him, that's another story.).

Irrespective of what relationship it is (friendship or something more), I understand the "hot and cold" very well maybe because Leo and gem (You and I) share a lot of similarities? Yep, he used to go (and still does) into super flattery mode like nobody else can and make me feel awesome only to go totally cold the next day! From here, two ways - 1) when I used to end the silent treatment and begin the talk, he'd act like nothing was ever wrong knowing very well I'm not happy and continue to go attend to his family and friends, or 2) I'd stick to my "pride" and either not talk or give him a loud roar telling "this is it! I'm leaving!" and he'd come back crawling putting up a very good apologetic act - and if and when I accept his apologies, his "hot and cold" next episode begins!

I don't know your level of anger, but I get super angry (I love my anger, lol) and these days, I'm NOT going to him. I decided to give him a mix of his tricks plus my strengths. Yep, when he comes back, I'd act like nothing was ever wrong, tell him honestly about all the other men that contacted me (let him fume secretly, who cares!), and he has only a few options: either to walk out of my life completely (which I know he can't - we really like each other), or keep crawling back to me and apologising (who's ever heard of a Leo apologizing for someone else's faults?), or just stay in my life and listen to me telling him the truth about how many other men express their interests for me, or finally learn to grow up and treat a woman like she deserves to be treated (which he's slowly learning).

Either they come or they go. You don't have to be cold when he comes to you, but don't go first either. You don't want to keep feeding his ego! We Leos love all our loved ones deeply, but Pride first. This pride kinda acts like a filter - guess you get my point. Good luck! 🙂

Thank you .my anger ia because like u said hed act all innocent like he doesnt do wrong so he ll either convince me im imagining things or that i misunderstood.i mean i think he likes me since he would be all over me if im giving more attention to other guys or would stare daggers at me and act cold.this behavior wasnt there in the beginning until our company hired new people and the dudes that i socialize with are cool amd friendly so he might think i dont care about him anymore and the head games began...the funny thing is that i can read him like a book its like my flaws and qualities are reflected at me

click to expand

Sounds like you either need to shit or get off the pot lol

Posted by lilyofthevalley987

Posted by InLoveWithLife
Hey, girl! I totally get what you mean! You used the word "ego", but I'm a Leo, so I'll rather stick with "pride". A gem guy I now know for 5 - 6 months, Mr. Excuses, does something similar to me even though it's kinda LDR. No sex, no relationship label yet, he admits he loves me but he also says that I should not assume that he loves me. Yeah, seems like a total nutcase, but he frames those sentences trickily (and I enjoy returning his trickiness to him, that's another story.).

Irrespective of what relationship it is (friendship or something more), I understand the "hot and cold" very well maybe because Leo and gem (You and I) share a lot of similarities? Yep, he used to go (and still does) into super flattery mode like nobody else can and make me feel awesome only to go totally cold the next day! From here, two ways - 1) when I used to end the silent treatment and begin the talk, he'd act like nothing was ever wrong knowing very well I'm not happy and continue to go attend to his family and friends, or 2) I'd stick to my "pride" and either not talk or give him a loud roar telling "this is it! I'm leaving!" and he'd come back crawling putting up a very good apologetic act - and if and when I accept his apologies, his "hot and cold" next episode begins!

I don't know your level of anger, but I get super angry (I love my anger, lol) and these days, I'm NOT going to him. I decided to give him a mix of his tricks plus my strengths. Yep, when he comes back, I'd act like nothing was ever wrong, tell him honestly about all the other men that contacted me (let him fume secretly, who cares!), and he has only a few options: either to walk out of my life completely (which I know he can't - we really like each other), or keep crawling back to me and apologising (who's ever heard of a Leo apologizing for someone else's faults?), or just stay in my life and listen to me telling him the truth about how many other men express their interests for me, or finally learn to grow up and treat a woman like she deserves to be treated (which he's slowly learning).

Either they come or they go. You don't have to be cold when he comes to you, but don't go first either. You don't want to keep feeding his ego! We Leos love all our loved ones deeply, but Pride first. This pride kinda acts like a filter - guess you get my point. Good luck! 🙂

Thank you .my anger ia because like u said hed act all innocent like he doesnt do wrong so he ll either convince me im imagining things or that i misunderstood.i mean i think he likes me since he would be all over me if im giving more attention to other guys or would stare daggers at me and act cold.this behavior wasnt there in the beginning until our company hired new people and the dudes that i socialize with are cool amd friendly so he might think i dont care about him anymore and the head games began...the funny thing is that i can read him like a book its like my flaws and qualities are reflected at me

click to expand

I can understand your anger. Irrespective of sun signs, any woman would get mad when a man behaves like he did nothing wrong! LOL, even with this guy, I used to get the "mirror" feeling, but we also have strong differences. I really can't understand. Like poles also clash. Opposite poles also clash. Whom to be with, then? How about you and I exchange these guys for a week? 😉

Posted by InLoveWithLife

Posted by lilyofthevalley987

Posted by InLoveWithLife
Hey, girl! I totally get what you mean! You used the word "ego", but I'm a Leo, so I'll rather stick with "pride". A gem guy I now know for 5 - 6 months, Mr. Excuses, does something similar to me even though it's kinda LDR. No sex, no relationship label yet, he admits he loves me but he also says that I should not assume that he loves me. Yeah, seems like a total nutcase, but he frames those sentences trickily (and I enjoy returning his trickiness to him, that's another story.).

Irrespective of what relationship it is (friendship or something more), I understand the "hot and cold" very well maybe because Leo and gem (You and I) share a lot of similarities? Yep, he used to go (and still does) into super flattery mode like nobody else can and make me feel awesome only to go totally cold the next day! From here, two ways - 1) when I used to end the silent treatment and begin the talk, he'd act like nothing was ever wrong knowing very well I'm not happy and continue to go attend to his family and friends, or 2) I'd stick to my "pride" and either not talk or give him a loud roar telling "this is it! I'm leaving!" and he'd come back crawling putting up a very good apologetic act - and if and when I accept his apologies, his "hot and cold" next episode begins!

I don't know your level of anger, but I get super angry (I love my anger, lol) and these days, I'm NOT going to him. I decided to give him a mix of his tricks plus my strengths. Yep, when he comes back, I'd act like nothing was ever wrong, tell him honestly about all the other men that contacted me (let him fume secretly, who cares!), and he has only a few options: either to walk out of my life completely (which I know he can't - we really like each other), or keep crawling back to me and apologising (who's ever heard of a Leo apologizing for someone else's faults?), or just stay in my life and listen to me telling him the truth about how many other men express their interests for me, or finally learn to grow up and treat a woman like she deserves to be treated (which he's slowly learning).

Either they come or they go. You don't have to be cold when he comes to you, but don't go first either. You don't want to keep feeding his ego! We Leos love all our loved ones deeply, but Pride first. This pride kinda acts like a filter - guess you get my point. Good luck! 🙂

Thank you .my anger ia because like u said hed act all innocent like he doesnt do wrong so he ll either convince me im imagining things or that i misunderstood.i mean i think he likes me since he would be all over me if im giving more attention to other guys or would stare daggers at me and act cold.this behavior wasnt there in the beginning until our company hired new people and the dudes that i socialize with are cool amd friendly so he might think i dont care about him anymore and the head games began...the funny thing is that i can read him like a book its like my flaws and qualities are reflected at me

I can understand your anger. Irrespective of sun signs, any woman would get mad when a man behaves like he did nothing wrong! LOL, even with this guy, I used to get the "mirror" feeling, but we also have strong differences. I really can't understand. Like poles also clash. Opposite poles also clash. Whom to be with, then? How about you and I exchange these guys for a week? 😉

click to expand

LOL

thank you all for your advices and opinions,we cleared the air and now all is good,so after all communication is the key

Posted by lilyofthevalley987
thank you all for your advices and opinions,we cleared the air and now all is good,so after all communication is the key

Communication is key. With the Gem I know, too, things would get easily cleared, but the BIGGEST, MOST ANNOYING problem is he'd repeat this hot and cold, fight and get back cycle over and over. And add to it his tactics: As though he did nothing wrong and I'm the one starting all the fights. Just in case this guy can keep it going consistently, let us know - we'll all be surprised and happy for you.

Posted by lilyofthevalley987
thank you all for your advices and opinions,we cleared the air and now all is good,so after all communication is the key

Soo you guys are dating now?