Can Leo be put to place? Can you deal with it! :)

Same Taurean girl (man I love leos, thats why I hang out here!!) who posted about
breaking up with a leo who had long distance gf overseas.
its been a week and he's been sending me msgs saying he's thinking of me and he even told his share mate
to tell me that he misses me.

which is all very nice and all...but as a bull i never go back to the same thing i left.
im going to send a msg to him saying
"I miss you too and I think about you a lot. But please dont send me these msgs unless you can offer me
more than sex and ambiguity if you do respect me as you say."
it wasn't just sex....i was his gf in this country, man i feel like a loser saying this.

But! Leos, would this be too much of an ego scratch? How would you take it if you got this sort of message?

Oh, adding one thing. In his mind, we were in a relationship...yeah i know. odd but apparently some ppl
can love 2 ppl at once (i guess its because shes in overseas...may be its a guy thing)
something i cant understand...

i'm liking your text a whole lot personally but i'm scorpio so it doesn't count and PLEASE don't take my word for it cos i'm a complete screw-up when it comes to leo men.

so don't send it till you hear it from the lion's mouth, lol.

I wouldn't say that's a blow to the ego, as much as it is a minimal requirement for your quality time. Since you asked specific questions, I'll refrain from giving the response that I would if I was asked generally.

Well if I got this type of message under the same circumstances - to be blunt, I'd do it again. It's just a light 'tap on the nose' or the 'spray from a water bottle' you'd give a cat after scratching you. The cat will probably misbehave again, but the only problem is that the cat will just become better at hiding when its misbehaving.

A triple (ugh) leo and I (double) have done this to one another. Multiple times on both sides.

If you're going to send it, I'd suggest cutting out the 'weak' points. Bareboned. Leos are good at conning and manipulating when they sese emotional feedback. Take it out so he can't con you with giving pinpointed emotions. He'll most likely become hysterical then worrying then seething angry for all of 6 hours then go back to upset then ashamed. Don't let him fool you with seeming ashamed. If he starts to beg - wait longer. Leos are good actors and will stoop low before ashamed.

It's more tact as...
'Don't message me until you respect me. Respect is more than sex and being honest, not ambiguous. When you learn to respect my needs more, maybe then we can talk. But not until then.'

Screw his ego, and worry about yours.

Wow, again awesome feedbacks as usual.
I still didn't send the msg.
@ seraph: I've never kept him at bay! When I like someone there's no games.
I'm not the needy type either but he never had to do much work i wad always the patient loyal subject
(who also had her own life...I'm very busy n I have many commitment so I stayed true
To that but no he had it easy with me)

@sheathedclaw
Yeah screw his ego... I need to be more firm?
I think you r right too it's just a tap on the nose it's not much...
May be silence is the strongest answer here? He knows why I left so may be it's no use
Replying anything...I've never not replied to him or to anyone else who sends me msgs.


@rigomortis
Thank you for your kind feedback! Wish I could date you!! Haha

Jeeeebus this is hard..,

I still think he's underestimating your will if it's silence. Silence to a lion at first is really frustrating but it slowly phases out with new established confidence and later on it's not a point he'd get. Some Leos find it difficult to 'depthfully' read between the lines. He may know why you left - but not what values he had forsaken and what ideals you NEED to maintain a continued *CONTACT* (note I don't say love interest, friend, or even acquaintance). Sacrificing your values (even a bit) will not only result in respect he may develop.. but respect of yourself, in hindsight.

Remember that you're the one that you will always wake up with.

Imagine worst case scenario: he screws around with you, leaves in the middle of the night from your bed to meet a gf that took a plane, and they screw around. You wake up to texts from friends finding out. You sit there in bed, tired and trying to wrap your mind around it. You feel used and dirty - you ask yourself 'how could I have been so blind? how could I do this to myself?'

Imagine best case scenario: he screws with you. You wake up. He's there. You cuddle closer and drift off. Both of you sleep in that day.

The variables don't have to have such a stark difference. It sucks overthinking after a fallout with a lover. There is no comfort, no warmth, no 'home' feeling because you're feeling like you swallowed a rock. And as a Taurus, I'm sure I can't even imagine that lack of sweet nostalgia and comfort. You need to cushion yourself for everything in life with maintaining RESPECT FOR YOURSELF. That's worth at *least* standing up for, so if you wake up - alone, you can drift off to sleep because you took care of you. There's no hindsight there.

Posted by seraph

Posted by donggri84
Wow, again awesome feedbacks as usual.
I still didn't send the msg.
@ seraph: I've never kept him at bay!

click to expand

Know what's an even BIGGER problem? That ugly raincoat with short socks. THAT'S SO MESSED UP.

1. Not cute
2. Not logical

If it is not 1.. not 2.. not 1 and 2...

then it is not for anyone. ew.

Hahaha I love that picture!! @Seraph!
Yep, I will certainly take your feedback into deep consideration!
i do love the comfort and miss the warmth and touch.

Here is a thing,
My venus is in Aries!!! 🙂
I guess the best thing to do here is...since I dont know exactly what to write back, I just won't for now
until I know.
But when I do, i will take Sheathedclaw's advice and be very firm

Seraph put it all too well.

Female Leos are similar as well with that sort. I've courted the company, unfortunately, of all too many a man at once. Not sexual manner (well, hmph - not all.. at once 😛 heh) but even an early bird leaves boredom for my mind at night - and you can't leave a Leo without some type of distraction without expecting a mess.. So night owls would take me out to dinner.

Emphasis on would. Play the game right and you'll have him eating out of your hand at the same time everyday.

Competition in low doses would be ideal IF he proves worthy. Aries Venusand Leo could play fun with some competition, and would create some interesting romping of sorts later on. 😉

And that's also keeping in mind that it's probably too late, as he pointed out. Unless you two bump into each other in YEARS from now and all that jazz.

Hahahaha thanks both 🙂
this is very interesting!
Well, this is my aries in venus saying...oh well~
I still love all your leos! always will be my favourite 🙂
Enigmatic yous!!

Posted by seraph
In the beginning, before the two of you got together, did you make him work for it? I mean *really* work for it. How long did you keep him at bay?

you know, i keep hearing this and i'm not convinced that how hard you make a guy 'work for it' is an issue. mainly cos if you are making a guy work for it, you are essentially playing games and that could have a detrimental impact. using any kind of 'strategy' to win someone over will always fail imo.

this is why i think it's best just to be yourself. sure, you'll still get fucked over...happens to me all the time...but at least i've not tried to jump through hoops and be someone i'm not in the process. i naturally don't jump into bed with people anyway but if the mood took me, i very well might but i would be aware of the consequences of that action in terms of what signal i'm sending someone by doing that and i take responsibility for it.

having thought about your text i've decided that i think you should just walk away completely without further contact. in retrospect i wish i'd done this way earlier than i did cos all i did was extend my humiliation unnecessarily.

so don't send it. just don't talk to him. sort your head out.

oh. random thing. my aries ex used to always cite an example of how you can give it all up and still win the man...it was this other aries friend of ours who told us all how he had butt fucked this girl on the first night and then went on to marry her. they remain happily married now!

ewww. i kinda find that extreme but it does illustrate how there's no golden rule about how long to make a guy work for it.

blush

Posted by R1g0rM0rT1s

Posted by seraph
In the beginning, before the two of you got together, did you make him work for it? I mean *really* work for it. How long did you keep him at bay?

you know, i keep hearing this and i'm not convinced that how hard you make a guy 'work for it' is an issue. mainly cos if you are making a guy work for it, you are essentially playing games and that could have a detrimental impact. using any kind of 'strategy' to win someone over will always fail imo.

this is why i think it's best just to be yourself.

ewww. i kinda find that extreme but it does illustrate how there's no golden rule about how long to make a guy work for it.

blush

click to expand

that is what i think too.why to pretend otherwise when you really want something?
and i honestly thought that Leos were not into mind games--mostly Capricorn or Scorpio men play mind games; whereas Leos are generally honest and spontaneous regarding what they want and appreciate honesty and spontaneity in other people too.
Guess I was wrong.

I don't think you can make a guy work for it either, I think they are mostly not that shallow - if a man wants to be with you he will stay with you no matter how soon you sleep with him, if he doesn't want to be with you he will leave no matter how long you make him wait for it. So regardless of when he gets sex he's staying or going depending on how he feels about you in other ways. I've never made a man I want wait on it, cause i'm not interested in waiting on it (venus is leo, gotta love that placement) and i've never had a man leave once he got it, they all stuck around.

Leo's don't play mind games, to honest, impulsive and spontaneous for that.

Posted by donggri84
Same Taurean girl (man I love leos, thats why I hang out here!!) who posted about
breaking up with a leo who had long distance gf overseas.
its been a week and he's been sending me msgs saying he's thinking of me and he even told his share mate
to tell me that he misses me.

which is all very nice and all...but as a bull i never go back to the same thing i left.
im going to send a msg to him saying
"I miss you too and I think about you a lot. But please dont send me these msgs unless you can offer me
more than sex and ambiguity if you do respect me as you say."
it wasn't just sex....i was his gf in this country, man i feel like a loser saying this.

But! Leos, would this be too much of an ego scratch? How would you take it if you got this sort of message?

Don't reply, he is sending out those messages as he wants to keep you in his circle, he doesn't really want to lose you, but he doesn't want you fully in there anymore. He does miss you, but your not his life partner. The message you are planning on sending is also FULL of emotion.

Posted by celticlioness
I don't think you can make a guy work for it either, I think they are mostly not that shallow - if a man wants to be with you he will stay with you no matter how soon you sleep with him, if he doesn't want to be with you he will leave no matter how long you make him wait for it. So regardless of when he gets sex he's staying or going depending on how he feels about you in other ways. I've never made a man I want wait on it, cause i'm not interested in waiting on it (venus is leo, gotta love that placement) and i've never had a man leave once he got it, they all stuck around.

Leo's don't play mind games, to honest, impulsive and spontaneous for that.

Agreed 100%

Posted by celticlioness
I don't think you can make a guy work for it either, I think they are mostly not that shallow - if a man wants to be with you he will stay with you no matter how soon you sleep with him, if he doesn't want to be with you he will leave no matter how long you make him wait for it. So regardless of when he gets sex he's staying or going depending on how he feels about you in other ways. I've never made a man I want wait on it, cause i'm not interested in waiting on it (venus is leo, gotta love that placement) and i've never had a man leave once he got it, they all stuck around.

Leo's don't play mind games, to honest, impulsive and spontaneous for that.

sorry but i'm gonna digress just a little tad but it's still a leo theme. it's just that the above statement about leos not playing mind games and being honest...well, there's no point requoting the fucking thing stupid woman!!!

it's just that the leo knobhead i met last summer was all of those things but when his 'ex' reappeared and went ballistic about me, he became none of those things in an instant. started playing mind games, talking bullshit etc, etc...

but recently, after a long while of silence, i called him to see if he wanted to meet up and bury the hatchett..move on as friends...cos we will run into each other at some point for sure. he didn't recognise my number cos it's fairly new and so i caught him off guard. after the initial surprise/shock wore off, we had a great chat. really relaxed. said how much he wanted to see me....asked about my kids....chatted about him having had flu but carrying on working bravely through it. so he said he would leave work early one day the following week to meet up for a drink and that he would call after the weekend to arrange.

well, the call never came and that was back in february.

so what i want to know is...if leos are supposed to be so honest...why not just tell me what's going on? why not just say, i don't/can't see you and give a reason/excuse...even by email instead of calling me!

i don't get why he still feels the need to dangle me on a thread when it would be the easiest thing just to cut it himself.

it doesn't really matter any more as i've cut it myself and feel ok with that too...it's just this one thing that bugs me. we had a connection, there was absolutely no disputing it and i'm not as easily fooled as i may s

fuck dxp!!

as i may seem. so why can't he just come out with it! surely if you don't want someone, it's the easiest thing in the world to tell them?? even by email if you're gutless?

i dunno...doesn't seem to be very leonine behaviour. he has a libra moon like me though. if his ex went mental with him over me, he would do pretty much anything to make things right, including having me blocked on facebook. i know i would so gotta hand it to her really.

but why didn't he just spit it out—

sorry for the rant. yes, seraph it is the SAME leo. having a bad day with it all 😢

not bad enough to contact him though at least.

Looove your knew photo.

He's telling you he doesn't want contact but he's using silence, the loudest and most powerful message you can use - ever heard of the cowardly lion. Leo men and leo women are poles apart - the women are fearless always 😉

I'll PM you later, have to go get my house ready to throw a party for my baby brother.

Posted by seraph


Leos (men who are that particular personality, that is) don't need to "play mind games" in order to attach a particular value to you and categorize you accordingly, based on how you deal with them initially. It's instinctive.

would you please rephrase this sentence,i think i could not understand it
do you mean that a woman's initial responses determine her stature in men's eyes?
that sounds to be a bit childish?
we all keep on evolving and learning ? why to brand a person based on first impressions?

What sort of POWER?
are you referring to the way some extra capable women have used their sexuality as a weapon or tool, like Cleopatra ,i can't remember name on any other femme fatal right now. but not every woman is good at these things,besides what is the point of being good, i mean no one can use one'self to acquire something.
i am muddling up thing again, i think
so much for my Mercury in Leo

Posted by seraph
She's dealing with a particular male personality.

She either addresses that personality and deals with him from that standpoint, or she can continue being naive. But by the looks of it she's taking it in stride.

Leos (men who are that particular personality, that is) don't need to "play mind games" in order to attach a particular value to you and categorize you accordingly, based on how you deal with them initially. It's instinctive.

well, how i dealt with him initially was to completey ignore him! we met months before the summer but i was so busy when he was coming on to me that i was kind of a bit dismissive towards him..then i left for the day and that was that. he said he wanted to track me down cos i'd told him where i lived apparently....said he'd driven up that way and thought about asking around but what stopped him was that he thought i would tell him to fuck off.

so when we met the second time, i was like...i remember you from somewhere and he answered...'i've never forgotten you'.

yeah, yeah. sweet as fuck. it's ok. i know it for what it was now but i have all these placements in my chart that suggest i have a tendancy to turn bad hurtful memories into something it wasn't quite, so it suits me better and i can deal with it.

i know it's pathetic....i'm jus' sayin'...and i would rather say it here than out loud. the dog is sick of hearing it, lol.

Posted by seraph

Posted by ShahBano

Posted by seraph


Leos (men who are that particular personality, that is) don't need to "play mind games" in order to attach a particular value to you and categorize you accordingly, based on how you deal with them initially. It's instinctive.

would you please rephrase this sentence,i think i could not understand it
do you mean that a woman's initial responses determine her stature in men's eyes?
that sounds to be a bit childish?

Of course it's "childish", because it's primal. It's so basic. There is no high-level thinking going on here, because there doesn't need to be any.

How you, as a woman, deal in your sexuality (how you use it, respect it, value it) says certain things about you to certain men, and indeed, the world at large. Your sexuality is part of your POWER, at the most basic level.

Think about it.

click to expand

i'm teaching my aries sun/scorp rising daughter the basics of pussy power right now actually (although she's only nearly 13 so i don't call it that)...but i am encouraging her to acknowledge her 'power' and use it wisely because if used unwisely and given away, you become powerLESS.

some of my best manipulations have been based upon the prospect of getting me into bed and have been pulled off prior to it happening. the combination of looks and intellect in a woman is power of immense proportions...enough to bring presidents down.

as with all weapons, you treat them with respect lest they backfire on you.

@ RigorMortis
It is not just good but really thoughtful that you are teaching your daughter at an early age,why we should all learn from our mistakes;sometimes it's better to learn from the mistakes of our loved ones,saves us undue heartache.
i was raised in a nunnery,no puns,really

lol @ shah....well, i wasn't raised in a nunnery but it was a very strict environment nevertheless. unfortunately, it often happens that kids coming from ultra disciplined backgrounds go on to be particularly wild as young adults. fortunately, in the west that is possible. i was a very wild one.

the other reason for teaching my daughter at this age is because...and this will shock most people...the age of consent in spain is 13!!! only raised from 12 in recent years and it's the same age for homosexuals too.

it's a catholic country, need i say more?

Posted by R1g0rM0rT1s
l

the other reason for teaching my daughter at this age is because...and this will shock most people...the age of consent in spain is 13!!! only raised from 12 in recent years and it's the same age for homosexuals too.

it's a catholic country, need i say more?

No,
You are being prudent,
The atmosphere where i was raised made us feel more ashamed of, and sick of being women.My convent was not Catholic but strictly puritan.even at the age of 15 lip gloss too was forbidden ,considered to be a whorish thing by our Sisters .in my whole life i have only once put on lipstick and i regret that day / night😉

oh hell
i wanted to insert a sad face and i inserted a winky,

LOL at your winky!!

yeah i wasn't allowed makeup. i wasn't allowed to mix with christian kids either which was just about everyone where we moved to in london. up until 10 i was in israel and so it was a big culture shock for me. when i was 15 i started rebelling though but i would always leave the house looking like a vestal virgin only to change at my friend's house into something a whole lot less virginal, lol!!

i remember once, when i was 15, my father had followed me without my knowing and had waited until i was drinking my first drink of the night, under-age in the bar when he pounced. he outed me so bad it was humiliating and even had i wanted to go out drinking again, i was busted and so had to wait til i was 18.

although, what really happened was that i stopped drinking in bars and started drinking at friends' houses, lol.

imagine, how brave we think we are and easily maneuverable we prove out to be consequently .I was the first girl in my class who smoked, then who pinned a poster of a model(male) next to her bed and then who smoked pot.had it been not for my pride i might have found a way to date some one as well.and despite all the high spirited rebelliousness one sentence had always been enough to deflate my spirits ,"What would your father think,Shahbano" and all fight used to bleed out of me,almost instantly.
Still the same.

something horribly went wrong with my grammar up there !

tsk, tsk..what would your father say!! lol 🙂

I slept with the person I'm with the first time I met him, thought I'd never see him again and then we ended up seeing each together for about a year counting. Men already work for women with most of the things they do in their everyday lives; "If it weren't for women, men would be content living in a cardboard box." I'm not saying that a man shouldn't show feelings of affection by courting a woman, I'm just saying that they shouldn't feel forced to through manipulative head games.

*each other