Confused about Libra man

I'm a gemini and I work with this guy who told me his birthday and it happens that he's a libra. Getting to the point, I'm an openly gay man and he knows it...but I'm not sure if he plays for the same team. I wanna say he's straight but he flirts and teases me when we work together. I know Libras are known for their charm (I can be quite charming myself) but sometimes he gives me this look and I sense something in his eyes when he smiles at me. Libra men are so confusing help

It's only confusing because you're trying to see things that aren't there.

Depends what you mean by "he flirts and teases with me". I tease everyone and have been accused of flirting with everyone too. Maybe he's just being nice/friendly. You said you think he's straight, why? And if you think he is straight, why would his friendliness be anything but that?

Everyone looks (and sounds) better when they smile. Telemarketers are taught to smile while they talk. I smile at everyone. Maybe he's just a happy person trying to spread it, smiling is contagious you know.

Ohhh! He knows you're gay. Congratulate him on his courage for coming out! You heard office talk that he came out and you just wanted to welcome him to your team. He'll make it real clear which side he's batting from.

You know I'm right Tiz, how many time have you been accused of flirting when you were just having a conversation? If you listen to someone, smile, respond with intelligence...you're flirting, it makes me crazy.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
It's only confusing because you're trying to see things that aren't there.

?

Posted by LibraSid
Depends what you mean by "he flirts and teases with me". I tease everyone and have been accused of flirting with everyone too. Maybe he's just being nice/friendly. You said you think he's straight, why? And if you think he is straight, why would his friendliness be anything but that?

Everyone looks (and sounds) better when they smile. Telemarketers are taught to smile while they talk. I smile at everyone. Maybe he's just a happy person trying to spread it, smiling is contagious you know.

Ohhh! He knows you're gay. Congratulate him on his courage for coming out! You heard office talk that he came out and you just wanted to welcome him to your team. He'll make it real clear which side he's batting from.

Oh the cliche "he's just being nice" answer. Personally i'm the same way so I get that. He blushes at me when he smiles and finds reasons to touch me. Now if that's everyone just being friendly, then maybe people should take it down a notch and save others the confusion. "Everyone looks (and sounds) better when they smile. Telemarketers are taught to smile while they talk." Yay common sense!! It's quite easy for me to tell the difference between flirting and just being friendly. I assume he knows of my sexuality because I don't hide it. And if he made it real clear which side he's "battling from", don't you think I wouldn't have posted this in the first place?

The hug comment was playful. Just saying it'd make him clear it up real quick. If he's blushing and touching you, go for it. That's more than I meant with my friendliness.

Posted by LibraSid
The hug comment was playful. Just saying it'd make him clear it up real quick. If he's blushing and touching you, go for it. That's more than I meant with my friendliness.

Sorry I must have missed the hug comment. I see what you mean and will take that advice. Thank you!

Posted by SortaRicanGemini

Posted by rockyroadicecream
It's only confusing because you're trying to see things that aren't there.

?

click to expand

If you don't understand that point, then I'm definitely right in stating that.

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by SortaRicanGemini

Posted by rockyroadicecream
It's only confusing because you're trying to see things that aren't there.

?

If you don't understand that point, then I'm definitely right in stating that.

click to expand

and if you can't clarify your point, then what you say has no matter.

Drifting off topic here.

Libras flirt with everyone. That's why they're not popular guests at funerals.

Even objects. I've seen it happen more than once.

I have this plot in my mind for a movie starring a Libra man. One day all the objects he flirts with gain sentience. Some of them find their way online where they meet a lot of objects from his past. Funny harems form. I can take it anywhere from that point..thriller, romance, comedy..you name it.

It just dawned on me that Belle from Beauty and the Beast must have been a Libra..convinced that the wardrobe, teacup and all the other objects were talking back to her.

Posted by SortaRicanGemini

and if you can't clarify your point, then what you say has no matter.

*sigh*

YOUR tingly bits are tingling because YOU have a thing for the guy. Of course you're going to read into every little minute detail as possible interest. We've all done it at some point in our lives- you had someone you liked, weren't sure if they had interest, so you can't help but look into every tiny thing, hoping it's a glimmer of insight into them being interested back.

You don't even know if dude is straight or gay, but are mining for anything to tell you he wants your dick too.

Like I said, I think you're confusing yourself because you're looking too hard. Being friendly and "blushing" could all be turned around in your own head as something else because you want dude to like you back.

Libras are notorious for being flirty whores and it doesn't always mean they have genuine interest. This guy could be blushing because he knows you're gay and if he isn't he may be a little unsure how to act. Who knows.

You know how a Libra is into you? When they fricken ask you out.

And if you still can't figure it out- ask.

Posted by Damnata
Drifting off topic here.

Libras flirt with everyone. That's why they're not popular guests at funerals.

Even objects. I've seen it happen more than once.

I have this plot in my mind for a movie starring a Libra man. One day all the objects he flirts with gain sentience. Some of them find their way online where they meet a lot of objects from his past. Funny harems form. I can take it anywhere from that point..thriller, romance, comedy..you name it.

It just dawned on me that Belle from Beauty and the Beast must have been a Libra..convinced that the wardrobe, teacup and all the other objects were talking back to her.

lol

I've got a question as well and its kinda the same so I don't want to start a new topic..

Theres a guy in my class and he's a Libran and were really good friends cos I'm an aqua and he liked with this other chick because she's a leo and I guess librans go loco for leos but she's got a boyfriend and she rejects his approaches.

anyways we've been hanging out lately and he told me he was Bi and i think he's just telling that to me to make me want him more or something. He slept over one night and we shared the same bed and I didn't try anything and tonight he sends me msgs on Facebook saying he "likes hanging out with me", and I said "I liked hanging with him", he says "I bet you liked it when he slept in your bed", and I said "its not like that I like you like a brother"??_..and then he sent " I kinda like you" but we sent them both at the same time so it must have been a title awkward on his part??_..I don't know if he's serious or just likes getting attention from gay guys??_..if he's bullshitting me I will rip his mother fucking balls off!

Hey, I think he might be a little curious but he's not coming all the way out with it because he's in the work place, he probably is not ready to be as —open?? about it as you are. I say this because, NO straight man I know is going to flirt with another man. The genuine flirting Libra??s do is reserved for the opposite sex, UNLESS you playing for both teams. Also, NO straight man is going to be smiling all up another man's face, and finding reasons to touch him especially if he KNOWS that man is gay, he probably wouldn't be rude but I doubt he??d be trying to be buddies. What yall gonna talk about? And he wouldn't want you to get the wrong idea.
Look, since I don't know the dude, and we are going off of how you are writing him, I say he's either in the closet or down right curious.

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by SortaRicanGemini

and if you can't clarify your point, then what you say has no matter.

*sigh*

YOUR tingly bits are tingling because YOU have a thing for the guy. Of course you're going to read into every little minute detail as possible interest. We've all done it at some point in our lives- you had someone you liked, weren't sure if they had interest, so you can't help but look into every tiny thing, hoping it's a glimmer of insight into them being interested back.

You don't even know if dude is straight or gay, but are mining for anything to tell you he wants your dick too.

Like I said, I think you're confusing yourself because you're looking too hard. Being friendly and "blushing" could all be turned around in your own head as something else because you want dude to like you back.

Libras are notorious for being flirty whores and it doesn't always mean they have genuine interest. This guy could be blushing because he knows you're gay and if he isn't he may be a little unsure how to act. Who knows.

You know how a Libra is into you? When they fricken ask you out.

And if you still can't figure it out- ask.

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Thank you. I appreciate your input, and I know how crushes work lol. I don't want his dick i'm just curious about the situation in general because it's rare for me to be attracted to someone mentally.

Posted by pinklibra
Hey, I think he might be a little curious but he's not coming all the way out with it because he's in the work place, he probably is not ready to be as —open?? about it as you are. I say this because, NO straight man I know is going to flirt with another man. The genuine flirting Libra??s do is reserved for the opposite sex, UNLESS you playing for both teams. Also, NO straight man is going to be smiling all up another man's face, and finding reasons to touch him especially if he KNOWS that man is gay, he probably wouldn't be rude but I doubt he??d be trying to be buddies. What yall gonna talk about? And he wouldn't want you to get the wrong idea.
Look, since I don't know the dude, and we are going off of how you are writing him, I say he's either in the closet or down right curious.

OMG thank you! You hit it the nail on the head! That was where my curiosity was coming from in the first place. No straight man will flirt with another man (especially if the man he's charming is openly gay) because even if he's just being nice, they wont want to lead a gay man on.

Posted by tiziani
So you're seriously saying that men aren't allowing to flirt with anyone unless it's leading them on? Seems very controlling of you.

As I said, even in my experience as a straight man people flirt with me when they want a pick-me-up or positive attention.

I'd take rocky's advice that serious interest is when someone actually takes the steps to ask someone out.

Oh relax, it isn't that deep. As I said, most straight men won't flirt with gay men because they don't want to lead them on. Yeah very controlling of me.

Posted by tiziani
I'm perfectly relaxed and yes to me, that is controlling. People will flirt with anyone for whatever reasons they please usually - it's not uncommon to do it to get an advantage in the workplace. I mean that's just the real world

To me I don't think it's deep at all, you could just keep it very simple - someone who likes you will make it known to you in plain English. Otherwise just assume they're in it for themselves.

so people flirting for whatever reasons they do it isn't controlling but my opinion is? lmao!

CONTROL VIA FLIRTING

the new world order lolol.

Sounds hot. Ask him to meet up for a drinky-poo or 3 after work.

heheheh

Posted by tiziani

Posted by SortaRicanGemini

Posted by tiziani
I'm perfectly relaxed and yes to me, that is controlling. People will flirt with anyone for whatever reasons they please usually - it's not uncommon to do it to get an advantage in the workplace. I mean that's just the real world

To me I don't think it's deep at all, you could just keep it very simple - someone who likes you will make it known to you in plain English. Otherwise just assume they're in it for themselves.

so people flirting for whatever reasons they do it isn't controlling but my opinion is? lmao!

Hey if you don't think it's controlling, do what you gotta do. I expect a lot more "people shouldn't flirt unless they mean to lead others on" episodes are gonna pop up for you. Just complicating your life needlessly.

"You shouldn't flirt with me unless you're serious!"

click to expand

It's not that deep

Posted by SortaRicanGemini

Posted by pinklibra
Hey, I think he might be a little curious but he's not coming all the way out with it because he's in the work place, he probably is not ready to be as —open?? about it as you are. I say this because, NO straight man I know is going to flirt with another man. The genuine flirting Libra??s do is reserved for the opposite sex, UNLESS you playing for both teams. Also, NO straight man is going to be smiling all up another man's face, and finding reasons to touch him especially if he KNOWS that man is gay, he probably wouldn't be rude but I doubt he??d be trying to be buddies. What yall gonna talk about? And he wouldn't want you to get the wrong idea.
Look, since I don't know the dude, and we are going off of how you are writing him, I say he's either in the closet or down right curious.

OMG thank you! You hit it the nail on the head! That was where my curiosity was coming from in the first place. No straight man will flirt with another man (especially if the man he's charming is openly gay) because even if he's just being nice, they wont want to lead a gay man on.

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I work in restaurants where there's a pretty good ratio of gay dudes. I have seen my straight coworkers flirt and screw around with the gay guys. It's all in jest and everyone knows it's just them bsing. But I've seen it happen. To say that a straight guy wouldn't do it isn't entirely true.

I still think you need to do some more work on your part to figure out if he's gay or not. Have you seen his Facebook? Have you guys brought up any talk about personal stuff outside that would lead you to discover if he has a girlfriend or not?

...is your gaydar broken? I mean, I can spot a gay guy like 99% of the time. Some can be tricky, but even if I'm not entirely too sure, after talking to them about whatever, it can become pretty obvious based on what they talk about.

However, if dude is a closet case, I do understand the uncertainty.

Posted by tiziani
So you're seriously saying that men aren't allowing to flirt with anyone unless it's leading them on? Seems very controlling of you.

As I said, even in my experience as a straight man people flirt with me when they want a pick-me-up or positive attention.

I'd take rocky's advice that serious interest is when someone actually takes the steps to ask someone out.

NO. I see "straight" men, playfull joke with other "straight" men.

But they are not going to play that card with a man they know is gay because they wouldn't want to give him the impression to try anything.
Just saying if I saw my so called —straight?? man flirting with an openly —gay?? man, I'm dumping him. I don't have time to try and figure out which team he playing for. If I have to wonder, then it's a red flag.

when i say playfully joke, i mean i've seen them jokingly flirt then one of them will be like "Man go ahead with that gay shit." and they'll all start laughing.
I highly doubt they'll play like that with actual gay male for a couple reason.

1. They dont wanna give him the wrong impression
2. It's not funny, because he really is what they are implying
3. They wouldn't want to give other people around the idea that they are flying that way either.

Straight men that go to gay clubs in my opinion are suspect too. Starught men that hang out at "male strip clubs" suspect, if you dont work there just what are you trying to see?
Now see some people see that as a double standard, but there alot of things socitey has made a double standard and in my opinion it is what it is. If I see a straight man hanging with a gay man, and he didn't grow up with the dude, dude didn't save his life, he's not related to him, then I automatically assume he's questionable. I'm sorry. Not really, but sorry. lol

I agree with pink, I was gonna post something last night similar but couldn't figure out how to say it. I kept coming back to there being a difference between playing around and flirting. I've shad a buddy at the bar before flirting with a woman and talk is turning a little steamier but it's a group and everyone is playful. She says something like she isn't sure, yada yada. One of the guys may say if she don't take him home they're gonna. Stupid shit like that. We definitely ain't blushing and petting each other while it's said though.

Flirting implies intent. I don't flirt with other men. The jokes are reserved for friends who would know it was a joke and wouldn't act on it even if I were serious. Again, situation matter. I've told a gay dude that he was the best looking guy in the bar, but we worked there together and we're joking...i actually said he was "the most fabulous looking man there" haha.

LS and Tiz, would you seriously flirt with another man that you know is gay, if you have no interest in them?

Ok, just read the last page and my thoughts are with pink.

@ OP, I think he is clearly curious, whether he would act on it or not only time will tell. He could just get off of you getting off on him but never brave enough to try it.

Posted by pinklibra
when i say playfully joke, i mean i've seen them jokingly flirt then one of them will be like "Man go ahead with that gay shit." and they'll all start laughing.
I highly doubt they'll play like that with actual gay male for a couple reason.

1. They dont wanna give him the wrong impression
2. It's not funny, because he really is what they are implying
3. They wouldn't want to give other people around the idea that they are flying that way either.

Straight men that go to gay clubs in my opinion are suspect too. Starught men that hang out at "male strip clubs" suspect, if you dont work there just what are you trying to see?
Now see some people see that as a double standard, but there alot of things socitey has made a double standard and in my opinion it is what it is. If I see a straight man hanging with a gay man, and he didn't grow up with the dude, dude didn't save his life, he's not related to him, then I automatically assume he's questionable. I'm sorry. Not really, but sorry. lol

Have you addressed your issues of homophobia by chance?

Posted by LibraSid

I've told a gay dude that he was the best looking guy in the bar, but we worked there together and we're joking...i actually said he was "the most fabulous looking man there" haha.

This is what I mean right here. To an outsider, or say a gay guy who's crushing, this would be seen as flirting and/or joking around.

I mean come on, people. Every time someone brings up Libran flirting, it's categorized as being "friendly" or joking around. It's really hard to take it as serious intent because they're like this with EVERYONE and they joke and tease which is seen as flirting as well. Sometimes it's nothing one is aware that they're doing because THEY don't see it as flirting, but someone else would.

Posted by pinklibra

Straight men that go to gay clubs in my opinion are suspect too. Starught men that hang out at "male strip clubs" suspect, if you dont work there just what are you trying to see?
Now see some people see that as a double standard, but there alot of things socitey has made a double standard and in my opinion it is what it is. If I see a straight man hanging with a gay man, and he didn't grow up with the dude, dude didn't save his life, he's not related to him, then I automatically assume he's questionable. I'm sorry. Not really, but sorry. lol

It is a double standard and you saying it's okay makes you a jack ass. Women are always struggling with their sexuality due to chauvinist guys, and guys are always struggling with theirs because of women like you.

What if it were a straight woman who was going to lesbian clubs or strip clubs? Do you automatically assume they're gay, or just secure with their sexuality? I've gone to burlesque shows, which are dominantly female performers. Would you be a judgemental ass and assume my sexuality should be questioned?

Your ignorance on the subject matter is astounding, so you may want to pipe down a bit here before you REALLY come across as a bigot.

Btw, your icon reminds me of a lesbian chick I knew once. Does that mean you're a lesbian too??

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by LibraSid

I've told a gay dude that he was the best looking guy in the bar, but we worked there together and we're joking...i actually said he was "the most fabulous looking man there" haha.

This is what I mean right here. To an outsider, or say a gay guy who's crushing, this would be seen as flirting and/or joking around.

I mean come on, people. Every time someone brings up Libran flirting, it's categorized as being "friendly" or joking around. It's really hard to take it as serious intent because they're like this with EVERYONE and they joke and tease which is seen as flirting as well. Sometimes it's nothing one is aware that they're doing because THEY don't see it as flirting, but someone else would.

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For the record, in my mind, this was not flirting...at all.

Posted by LibraSid
You know I'm right Tiz, how many time have you been accused of flirting when you were just having a conversation? If you listen to someone, smile, respond with intelligence...you're flirting, it makes me crazy.

Hey, that's what Gems get accused of as well. 🙂