Libra disappeared in a WEEK?!

I'm a pretty evolved Pisces woman I've learned to adapt my emotions to not be SO overwhelming for people to handle, but anyway, met a beautiful Libra man 2 weeks ago. He was very caring, the classic Casanova.. Called me beautiful all the time etc etc, so anyway after about 2 weeks of texting and seeing each other he asked me to be his girlfriend , and when I say asked like did it almost like a marriage proposal very sincere very beautiful approach to it. It wasn't the first time he asked or said he was ready for that but he did it in a way that was very shall we say "official". I agreed and he prayed for our relationship a nice beautiful in-depth slow (like paused after every few words) prayer, it was the most impressive situation for me to experience. So we spent the night together the next day drank wine, talked laughed ... He's 27 I'm 28 by the way ... No love making but we were very touchy Feely ... He gave me money to pay my phone bill but throughout the night he kept saying I was gonna "f $ &k his head up" and how gorgeous I was and how I was really gonna mess his head up I assured him I wouldn't do anything to hurt him and I was really impressed with the man he was etc. so anyway next day as u probably have already guessed he's COLD TURKEY baby. No texts no calls ... I got in an argument with my neighbor texted him about it .. No response not even to make sure I was okay. Now I'm LOST I text him that if he felt we moved too quick we can take a step back and get to know each other a little more he responded "my love... Good looking out" that's it that's all ..?? I'm stumped it hasn't been long enuff for me to screw anything up ... Is he afraid of something TOO GOOD? He always used to tell me I'm the perfect woman for him, God has finally answered his prayers, all of his friends love me .. Anybody have a clue what happened here? He did get out of a relationship with a troll who cheated on him with an associate of his ... Whatsup Help?! lol

Oh and the mother of his son did leave him depressed he says for over 3 years ... Is he really just scared of me guys? I'm a very beautiful, patient woman but come on ...? Did his feelings make him uncomfortable? Will he come back ...? It's been 3 days and no contact

Posted by PowerfulPisces
after about 2 weeks of texting and seeing each other he asked me to be his girlfriend ,

and he prayed for our relationship

He gave me money to pay my phone bill

"f $ &k his head up" He always used to tell me I'm the perfect woman for him, God has finally answered his prayers, all of his friends love me .. Anybody have a clue what happened here?

For being oh so "evolved," you sure as hell ignored all the red flags.

You seem a bit dramatic and are easily conned by the dramatic. You were dwelling on stupid, trivial things like they meant something of major significance when it's just a typical, UNEVOLVED Libra manboy moves. Oh he prayed. Oh he called me all these nice things. Oh he made a big deal about "proposing" in a way to ask me to be his girlfriend. MUST BE LURVE! Oh he paid my phone bill.

Wtf this isn't a rap video, this is reality and him paying your bills means nothing.

Immature, stupid boys do these types of things, not real men. Real men know not to BUY a woman's affection- little boys do. They're all talk, no action. His actions are now telling you what's REALLY going on.

He moved too fast and you let him. Now that he's accomplished his mission, now he's not sure what he wants to do with you. These types do this- they move fast and once they get you, they have no idea wtf to do with you and now are second guessing their pushiness to make you theirs.

You just got played by a player. You've got some more "evolving" to do here.

@ OP

I'm willing to bet that you won't heed Rocky's words and simply leave him be and this is what will happen...if it isn't already: you will continue to text and call him and ask him what happened and he will mostly ignore you. But every once in a while he will send you another one of those cryptic texts. So you'll continue on and he may even say I'm sorry but please stop contacting me. So, you may speak him out and leave him alone ...but then viola! He shows back up and will use those deceptive charms to lure you back in.

Leave him be...now....and cease all contact and do even talk to him again. He is setting you up for an even bigger fall and this pattern will continue. He read you, told you what you wanted to hear and pulled the old bait n switch to get you to chase him. Honestly, he may simply be mirroring the energy you give. Who knows. But your best bet is to simply move on...unless you like drama and being in misery. Good luck

I may be a little dramatic in the way I described things but I love you guys' bluntness its what I needed to really clear up the smoke and mirrors thing ... Just didn't want to jump the gun and assume it was all "player" stuff if it was just fear and uncertainty ... I'm not desperate so I wont call and i havent but I am a little worried about being lured back in I won't justify my feelings or thoughts or try to make you understand the difference in what I felt with him vs other guys but I guess you guys are right ... I thought "Players" wanted sex or money tho?? Was it just the conquering aspect? Very weird to me

@rockyroadicecream ... And the only reason I said "evolved" is because I have mastered the emotional aspect of my sign... I didn't want everyone saying "oooohhh u Pisces are too clingy too emotional you probably ran him off" I'm still a PISCES at heart, and I've dated plenty of players hunny, I've ducked and dodge them too, but I keep my emotions at bay so as to not scare my suitors off ... Didn't feel like a "Play" tho ... Ive had those before lol

Now I'm LOST I text him that if he felt we moved too quick we can take a step back and get to know each other a little more he responded "my love... Good looking out" that's it that's all ..?? I'm stumped it hasn't been long enuff for me to screw anything up ... Is he afraid of something TOO GOOD? He always used to tell me I'm the perfect woman for him, God has finally answered his prayers, all of his friends love me .. Anybody have a clue what happened here? He did get out of a relationship with a troll who cheated on him with an associate of his ... Whatsup Help?! lol
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Did you have any control over this? YES. For you to be so evolved you did not say "listen it's nice you like me an all but two weeks is kinda quick to be making thing official. We should wait a while longer" How about that for responsibility. This man took control of every aspect of the situation and you let him. His next step is fucking you...he got you...now he is going to pretend you have all sorts of connections while he finds some other sucker chick to run game on.

Stop being silly. Swim far away and learn your lesson. The only God this man is praying to is the one between his legs. Ugh...silly girl...

Posted by PowerfulPisces
@rockyroadicecream ... And the only reason I said "evolved" is because I have mastered the emotional aspect of my sign...

You clearly don't if you're willing to pair off with someone after two weeks, "hunny."

Do what you must, but this guy was just full of it and you fell for it, hook, line, and sinker.

Also, lose that mentality of "HUR HE'S SCARED/ANXIOUS, ISN'T HE??" No. No man is "scared." If he is, he is NOT dating material. People who are "scared" or "anxious" in dating have no business dating, tbh.

The reality of any situation like this is that you replace "scared" with "jerk" and move along. Women need to get this mentality the fuck out of their heads. Anytime a guy acts like a jerk, I find it so STUPID and incredibly SAD that women don't categorize him as a "jerk" but turn him into some poor, emotional wreck that clearly needs "help." Women who do this are utterly pathetic and clearly desperate for some attention. This isn't necessarily directed at you OP, just a general observation I've made from women who make excuses for bad behavior in jerks.

He's just being a jerk. Scared? Highly doubt it.

Agree RockyRoad...Women are emotional creatures...Nurturing...see the good in folks instead of just seeing what is...Some men are just as you say..Jerks.

Saying a man is a jerk is a reflection of yourself. You are a weak person to fall for Jerk moves. So most of the time we run about that lable for sake of saving face.

I have let go a of a Jerk...and yes it is a reflection of me...except it is more of a lesson learned and less of a why me mentality.

Posted by SpinCycle
Agree RockyRoad...Women are emotional creatures...Nurturing...see the good in folks instead of just seeing what is...Some men are just as you say..Jerks.

Saying a man is a jerk is a reflection of yourself. You are a weak person to fall for Jerk moves. So most of the time we run about that lable for sake of saving face.

I have let go a of a Jerk...and yes it is a reflection of me...except it is more of a lesson learned and less of a why me mentality.

Sorry, gotta disagree with referring to a guy as a "jerk" being a reflection of oneself.

In dating, there's that initial phase where everyone is on their best behavior. This is where practically everyone can be conned/misled into who someone really is.

However, when they DO show their true self and say, the guy starts behaving like the OP's dude did, yes, he's a jerk. That is not a reflection on who the OP is. The guy put on a front to lure her in and now he's showing his real self. HOWEVER, if she continues on, believing the guy is the facade he gave when he's truly a jerk (because he is one- treating her like this now), then yes, that would consider her- or any woman in a situation like that- "weak."

I don't see it as "saving face" I see it as having the light shined on who they are, call it a learning experience, and move along.

But I do agree there are situations where people just do not take accountability for their own actions and just peg the other person as a jerk/asshole/bitch when they could have dropped them when they saw the signs. "WAAAH, HE'S A JERK/SHE'S A BITCH!!" *stays with them and/or finds a new person that treats them the exact same way*

Sorry, gotta disagree with referring to a guy as a "jerk" being a reflection of oneself.

In dating, there's that initial phase where everyone is on their best behavior. This is where practically everyone can be conned/misled into who someone really is.

However, when they DO show their true self and say, the guy starts behaving like the OP's dude did, yes, he's a jerk. That is not a reflection on who the OP is. The guy put on a front to lure her in and now he's showing his real self. HOWEVER, if she continues on, believing the guy is the facade he gave when he's truly a jerk (because he is one- treating her like this now), then yes, that would consider her- or any woman in a situation like that- "weak."

I don't see it as "saving face" I see it as having the light shined on who they are, call it a learning experience, and move along.

But I do agree there are situations where people just do not take accountability for their own actions and just peg the other person as a jerk/asshole/bitch when they could have dropped them when they saw the signs. "WAAAH, HE'S A JERK/SHE'S A BITCH!!" *stays with them and/or finds a new person that treats them the exact same way*
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I agree to a point. If we as women or men are mentally strong and mature in relationships red flags pop up immediately. If we are still learning people and the masks they wear we are weak in some way or fashion. Men or women who are jerks zero in on weak people. They have this uncanny radar on who they can get over on. We are still weak if we stay in such situations a day a week or a year. There is something about ourselves that we need to fix. A strong person would go on one date and see that this person is wearing a mask. Via conversation, the way they ate, even prayed.

So though we know the men or woman we are dating are jerks we would never say that aloud. It just shows what we are settling for. The old saying the light you shine out is what you attract back. Weak attracts weak..strong will attract strong. Strong will sometimes prey on the weak for power reasons etc.

I was weaker than I am today. I can say this. I have fallen for so many lines in the last year is isn't funny but I'm becoming stronger. I am able to say hell no at the date phase instead of let me wait and see more with no remorse.

It sounds like he thought he was ready to settle down and went "holy crap I'm committing to this women for the rest of my life..." I'ma a Libra....we do that....we ...and I read this somewhere and was like "yep, thats us"...we like the friendship, flirting, dating part...thats what we live for...scorpios prefer the relationship part...we just enjoy the ride of getting to committment....he took things way to fast and didnt realize it.

@SpinCycle:

There's no such thing as the "strong prey on the week." If their instinct is to take advantage of a "weak" person, then they themselves are weak and lack moral character...which matters the most. That mentality is the old alpha male/femsle bullshit that society tries to pass on us as the way it's supoosed to be. Truthfully, it's a Trojan horse for the age old exercise of man(including women) trying to find a morally superior argument and justification for selfishness. All kinds of bullshit arises from it because it's simply Fear. Sexism, racism, abuse, etc all of it is justified by "the strong prey on the weak." Truth is, people who live and think that way are pussies because they lack self respect and thus lack self control.

Weak

Posted by beautifulsoul74
@SpinCycle:

There's no such thing as the "strong prey on the week." If their instinct is to take advantage of a "weak" person, then they themselves are weak and lack moral character...which matters the most. That mentality is the old alpha male/femsle bullshit that society tries to pass on us as the way it's supoosed to be. Truthfully, it's a Trojan horse for the age old exercise of man(including women) trying to find a morally superior argument and justification for selfishness. All kinds of bullshit arises from it because it's simply Fear. Sexism, racism, abuse, etc all of it is justified by "the strong prey on the weak." Truth is, people who live and think that way are pussies because they lack self respect and thus lack self control.

What I meant by strong is anyone of power or has a powerful position. And yes I agree they are just as weak as what they are preying upon. Just a different form.

Posted by beautifulsoul74
@SpinCycle:

There's no such thing as the "strong prey on the week." If their instinct is to take advantage of a "weak" person, then they themselves are weak and lack moral character...which matters the most. That mentality is the old alpha male/femsle bullshit that society tries to pass on us as the way it's supoosed to be. Truthfully, it's a Trojan horse for the age old exercise of man(including women) trying to find a morally superior argument and justification for selfishness. All kinds of bullshit arises from it because it's simply Fear. Sexism, racism, abuse, etc all of it is justified by "the strong prey on the weak." Truth is, people who live and think that way are pussies because they lack self respect and thus lack self control.

What I meant by strong is anyone of power or has a powerful position. And yes I agree they are just as weak as what they are preying upon. Just a different form.

Posted by beautifulsoul74
@SpinCycle:

There's no such thing as the "strong prey on the week." If their instinct is to take advantage of a "weak" person, then they themselves are weak and lack moral character...which matters the most. That mentality is the old alpha male/femsle bullshit that society tries to pass on us as the way it's supoosed to be. Truthfully, it's a Trojan horse for the age old exercise of man(including women) trying to find a morally superior argument and justification for selfishness. All kinds of bullshit arises from it because it's simply Fear. Sexism, racism, abuse, etc all of it is justified by "the strong prey on the weak." Truth is, people who live and think that way are pussies because they lack self respect and thus lack self control.

+1

Posted by Curiousram
only 2 weeks? And moved so quick with paying ur phone bill ect.. red flag and the praying for the relationship to work? Another weird red flag id play it cool and go ghost and ignore him. Tbh this guy seems like he knows what hes doing or hes very unstable

^+1

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by SpinCycle
Agree RockyRoad...Women are emotional creatures...Nurturing...see the good in folks instead of just seeing what is...Some men are just as you say..Jerks.

Saying a man is a jerk is a reflection of yourself. You are a weak person to fall for Jerk moves. So most of the time we run about that lable for sake of saving face.

I have let go a of a Jerk...and yes it is a reflection of me...except it is more of a lesson learned and less of a why me mentality.

Sorry, gotta disagree with referring to a guy as a "jerk" being a reflection of oneself.

In dating, there's that initial phase where everyone is on their best behavior. This is where practically everyone can be conned/misled into who someone really is.

However, when they DO show their true self and say, the guy starts behaving like the OP's dude did, yes, he's a jerk. That is not a reflection on who the OP is. The guy put on a front to lure her in and now he's showing his real self. HOWEVER, if she continues on, believing the guy is the facade he gave when he's truly a jerk (because he is one- treating her like this now), then yes, that would consider her- or any woman in a situation like that- "weak."

I don't see it as "saving face" I see it as having the light shined on who they are, call it a learning experience, and move along.

But I do agree there are situations where people just do not take accountability for their own actions and just peg the other person as a jerk/asshole/bitch when they could have dropped them when they saw the signs. "WAAAH, HE'S A JERK/SHE'S A BITCH!!" *stays with them and/or finds a new person that treats them the exact same way*

click to expand

+10000 on this and everything else you said in this thread! I would like to add one thing, which I'm surprised that you missed. The OP is a rebound for this libra dude. She mentioned at the very end that he just came out of a relationship where his ex cheated on him. That's a rebound + jaded person getting in the dating pool too fast, too soon. That is the biggest red flag!! He should be taking a breather right now, but instead he's luring women like the OP to soothe his wounded ego. This guy is not necessarily in it for sex or
money because the OP
mentioned that she felt players are in it for money or

Sex. He's contaminating the dating pool with his selfishness, which is clearly to get his mojo back, which men lose when they feel rejected. I've also noticed that when men are looking to allay a bruised ego, they really don't care who the woman in front of them is (beautiful, caring, rich etc.), all they want is a quick ego boost by having a woman succumb to their charms. The sooner that happens, the sooner they move on to their new prey.

Posted by aquarius09


+10000 on this and everything else you said in this thread! I would like to add one thing, which I'm surprised that you missed. The OP is a rebound for this libra dude. She mentioned at the very end that he just came out of a relationship where his ex cheated on him. That's a rebound + jaded person getting in the dating pool too fast, too soon. That is the biggest red flag!! He should be taking a breather right now, but instead he's luring women like the OP to soothe his wounded ego. This guy is not necessarily in it for sex or money because the OP mentioned that she felt players are in it for money or sex. He's contaminating the dating pool with his selfishness, which is clearly to get his mojo back, which men lose when they feel rejected. I've also noticed that when men are looking to allay a bruised ego, they really don't care who the woman in front of them is (beautiful, caring, rich etc.), all they want is a quick ego boost by having a woman succumb to their charms. The sooner that happens, the sooner they move on to their new prey.

I'm not sure what I missed as there was nothing stated that she cheated, only left him depressed for 3 years, so I read it as they broke it off and his mopey ass was dwelling for 3 years.

However, it's not mentioned anywhere the amount of time between that ending and him starting with the OP, so I saw nothing to conclude that there was rebound going on.

Regardless, the guy's still a tool.

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by aquarius09


+10000 on this and everything else you said in this thread! I would like to add one thing, which I'm surprised that you missed. The OP is a rebound for this libra dude. She mentioned at the very end that he just came out of a relationship where his ex cheated on him. That's a rebound + jaded person getting in the dating pool too fast, too soon. That is the biggest red flag!! He should be taking a breather right now, but instead he's luring women like the OP to soothe his wounded ego. This guy is not necessarily in it for sex or money because the OP mentioned that she felt players are in it for money or sex. He's contaminating the dating pool with his selfishness, which is clearly to get his mojo back, which men lose when they feel rejected. I've also noticed that when men are looking to allay a bruised ego, they really don't care who the woman in front of them is (beautiful, caring, rich etc.), all they want is a quick ego boost by having a woman succumb to their charms. The sooner that happens, the sooner they move on to their new prey.

I'm not sure what I missed as there was nothing stated that she cheated, only left him depressed for 3 years, so I read it as they broke it off and his mopey ass was dwelling for 3 years.

However, it's not mentioned anywhere the amount of time between that ending and him starting with the OP, so I saw nothing to conclude that there was rebound going on.

Regardless, the guy's still a tool.

click to expand

Given the stats on libra men, I'd say he is the shiny new toy he was distracting himself with after his ego got hurt.

*she

I would like to know how soon after the breakup did he start seeing the Op

he seriously said good looking out, wow shows you he wasn't even ready yet he asked you out. Well lets see from a religious point of view: You were the women , probably still the women he prayed for yet you are as tempting as Delilah so he has ran away. Or he has saw yet another woman who seems to be the one and is taking everything slowly to see what his options are. Or he's unstable in his ways, tossed to and from like wind of doctrines?