Libra males!

Please tell me why is it that when you guys have the woman you want and she is there for you all the time you act like you dont care but when she leaves or stop messaging you like she used to..you guys come back to her all upset asking questions like why is she ignoring you, and if she has found someone else?

Yup, gotta love those libra men, they are something else I tell ya

I think the #1 thing people that keep asking advice aren't doing is they aren't communicating. Did you say "I don't like it when you go no comm for awhile and then come back and ask me why I haven't talked to you?" We like communication, yet I don't see anyone coming on here and saying I asked him why he did x because it starting to make me mad. If you look at one of the threads, I suggest that poster let her Libra know when something was bothering her and he in turn attempt to correct (along with saying what was upsetting him). Communication is a two way street.

I'll answer that part for ya,

Cause when we do ask, u libras act as if we are speaking a different language, u guys don't do confrontation well at all

And to have your faults put in front of you like that , u libras try to avoid the issue

When we know you seriously care about how or why we do something vs when your asking because you think you should. I'd say 96% of the people who ask me how I'm doing don't actually care how I am. I dealt with a woman who would pretend as if nothing happened each time she stood me up or would act upset by it when she was the one who bailed. Eventually, I just stopped bothering and she finally honestly asked if I was ok, then I gave it to her straight. It's amazing the tone of people's voices change when they actually care versus when they could care or less. If you ask me I give you an honest answer and I think most Libras will do the same.

Libra men flirt alot.....when females do a little light flirting they always seem to get upset and its like that is an issue worth breaking up over....some of the males believe they can do what they want while u sit down and do nothing.

It's called wanting what you can't have. Many men, including Libras, are like this.

@theGrinch, because when you ask/confront them about their bs, you get avoidance, run around in verbal circles, and answers aren't always given straight- depending on the subject.

Not all, but a lot are prone to this due to that nifty little fear factor of confrontation. I wonder if it's because they're emotionally invested? Say if it isn't as emotionally demanding in any way if they are more up front and honest, but when you confront them about something oh so scary like facing emotions or fessing up to something that's getting them in trouble - insta-runaround?

TaurusNikki has perfect right here !
And even ask Libra why do that and tell him you felt so sad or bad when he was acting like that, instead to change something, he will do more bad further ! I can't understand this way of action, it is really WEIRD !

I know, when confronted I always come clean. Like I said, at least for me, if you ask me honestly I'll give you an honest answer. If I'm going to see you on a regular basis (for me that is at least once a year) it's in my best interest to be straight with you. Randomly at a bar where we'll never cross paths again? Yeah I don't afford that person the same courtesy.

Posted by tiziani
You get what you give back. Reflection.

AMEN!!!

Posted by theGrinch

Posted by tiziani
You get what you give back. Reflection.

AMEN!!!

click to expand

Maybe I'm not understanding this clearly. So if your libra avoids confrontation, it's because the other person also avoids it?

I think males dictate the society and I also think that a woman is a reflection of her man. If she is going crazy, the guy has done something to cause it. I'm not talking about nutcases either.

To me it's hard to confront any Libra because they'll bury their head in sand to avoid any confrontation that has to do with their faults. They put forth so much work to have everyone perceive them as perfect. When I point out their faults, they act as if I'm crazy.

Posted by VenusStar
To me it's hard to confront any Libra because they'll bury their head in sand to avoid any confrontation that has to do with their faults. They put forth so much work to have everyone perceive them as perfect. When I point out their faults, they act as if I'm crazy.

+1. They are the ostrich with their head in the sand when confronted about their flaws and nonsensical behavior.

Posted by aquarius09

Posted by theGrinch

Posted by tiziani
You get what you give back. Reflection.

AMEN!!!

Maybe I'm not understanding this clearly. So if your libra avoids confrontation, it's because the other person also avoids it?

I think males dictate the society and I also think that a woman is a reflection of her man. If she is going crazy, the guy has done something to cause it. I'm not talking about nutcases either.

click to expand

Yep. Dating and relating is still very male oriented. They're the ones who inadvertently create the rules, and easily change them to their own benefit. Some of these responses are just more nonsensical drivel from the usual suspects.

the Grinch- I get what you're saying. I've known some Libra guys who are really straightforward and will tell you how it is. I have a couple that I know I can go to and they're straight up with me.

The reason why I asked that question was because the ones who are friends only territory have been pretty honest with me. With those who were more involved, they could be honest at times, but with emotional, sticky matters, they began to slip on the honesty bit and start to blur the lines between honesty and dishonesty. More avoidance was noticed, and playing dumb as far as what was happening was an issue.

Well, why did you do that?
"Dur, I dunno." *makes up more fluffy shit to avoid telling the truth*

So you were doing this and that and that's not cool. It made me feel _____.
(They start talking in circles, making no sense, trying to weave their way out of conflict and gradually turn the tables.)

I mean really, is it ego involved here? Getting called out on something that they did that was fucked up? Ohnoes, I did something bad! I'm being called out on it and it hurts my feewings! I don't like feeling like the bad guy!

Though I do gotta give them credit, after they were called out, there was some sort of effort to correct the issue, even if it was short lived (lol).

LOL I did get a good laugh from this post as I may or may not have done something like that in the past. It's not an ego thing (at least I don't believe so). It really comes down to, if we really like you we'll be straight to a point. I'm not out to hurt anyone's feelings when you're someone I like. I will say half the time I don't know why I do the things I do. I'm very much a gut player and so I'll go with it only to realize it was a bad decision.

It's rare for me to flip the script verbally. In my head I have it all worked out, but again I spare people the whole truth. Case in point, girl I was chasing blew me off twice on the weekend of my birthday. One excuse before and then an excuse after the fact. Her birthday rolls around and her friend says "I asked her what you made her for her birthday and she said nothing...what's wrong with you?" I laughed and said "thanks for throwing me under the bus." Her friend then proceeds to ask again a half hour later in front of her and she says "yeah, no special treats on my birthday?"

Now, inside I was ready to just explode and run the gauntlet about the no shows on my birthday. But, I gave an honest answer "nope". The look on her face was priceless because I have a skilled tongue, but provided a one word answer. No explanation, no flare, just an honest hurtful answer. An honest Libra, when we are brutally honest, is something most people regret.

In regards to it being a reflection, I'll explain it this way. I can read people very well (between my former occupation and being a Libra/people pleaser I'm good) and I know when people are happy/sad/upset/masking. When I ask someone (friend, coworker, significant other) how they are doing I'm not doing so to hear my own voice. What people fail to realize is as a Libra your mood greatly effects us whether we are the cause or not. I want to fix it and make you happy once again. When you give me "I'm fine" or "you don't care" then you set the tone for our relationship. If I'm the cause, I want to know because it means several things to me. I'm doing something wrong that I can change, I need to explain something I did, or you have an unrealistic expectation. In turn, it could be that I have done those things to you (misinterpreted something or set an unrealistic expectation).

Yes we flirt. Yes we tend to bend to people's will so everything is balanced. That is who we are and we can't change it anymore then a tiger can change his stripes. But I am one of the most loyal people you'll ever meet (to my own detriment most of the time). Once you're in it's almost impossible to get out.

Ok i am a libra female and i admit i do try my best to avoid confrontation. But if by chance someone does confront me on any matter I will tell them exactly what is on my mind. Eg. If a person upsets me i will withdraw and become very quiet. If people ask me whats wrong I will say nothing because in my anger i dont want to hurt your feelings. But if you push me i will let u have just what u have been asking for. Becareful what you wish for. Most Libras are nice and charming most the time so when we try to avoid confrontation, its for your own good. Leave us alone for a while then come back and ask about it. when im upset and im left alone after a while im just itching for you to ask me whats wrong so i cud get past it. We dont like to dwell on negativity for to long. i thought the males where somehow different.

Posted by theGrinch
In regards to it being a reflection, I'll explain it this way. I can read people very well (between my former occupation and being a Libra/people pleaser I'm good) and I know when people are happy/sad/upset/masking. When I ask someone (friend, coworker, significant other) how they are doing I'm not doing so to hear my own voice. What people fail to realize is as a Libra your mood greatly effects us whether we are the cause or not. I want to fix it and make you happy once again. When you give me "I'm fine" or "you don't care" then you set the tone for our relationship. If I'm the cause, I want to know because it means several things to me. I'm doing something wrong that I can change, I need to explain something I did, or you have an unrealistic expectation. In turn, it could be that I have done those things to you (misinterpreted something or set an unrealistic expectation).

Yes we flirt. Yes we tend to bend to people's will so everything is balanced. That is who we are and we can't change it anymore then a tiger can change his stripes. But I am one of the most loyal people you'll ever meet (to my own detriment most of the time). Once you're in it's almost impossible to get out.

This is soooo me

Posted by theGrinch
In regards to it being a reflection, I'll explain it this way. I can read people very well (between my former occupation and being a Libra/people pleaser I'm good) and I know when people are happy/sad/upset/masking. When I ask someone (friend, coworker, significant other) how they are doing I'm not doing so to hear my own voice. What people fail to realize is as a Libra your mood greatly effects us whether we are the cause or not. I want to fix it and make you happy once again. When you give me "I'm fine" or "you don't care" then you set the tone for our relationship. If I'm the cause, I want to know because it means several things to me. I'm doing something wrong that I can change, I need to explain something I did, or you have an unrealistic expectation. In turn, it could be that I have done those things to you (misinterpreted something or set an unrealistic expectation).

Yes we flirt. Yes we tend to bend to people's will so everything is balanced. That is who we are and we can't change it anymore then a tiger can change his stripes. But I am one of the most loyal people you'll ever meet (to my own detriment most of the time). Once you're in it's almost impossible to get out.

This is very theoretical. How about I put you on the spot and give you a scenario. Libras, as I know now but didnt back then, are pretty insecure. I have a lot of guy friends because growing up I was always hanging out with my 2 brothers and was a tomboy myself. I know many think guys and girls can't be friends, but I beg to differ. I have never liked a guy friend of mine nor made friends with someone that I knew to have a crush on me. Diring the time my ex and I were getting to know each other, he knew I had guy friends and he was ok with it. After we started going out, he had a problem with me having guy friends. If a guy friend called while we were together, his whole mood would go down. Then, he would make passive aggressive comments like "so and so likes you" and we would bicker over that. The argument would end with me assuring him that we're just friends and that my guy friend doesn't like me like that. I would even ask if he wanted me to abandon my male friends for him, and he would say no, even though I got the feeling that my relationship would be better if I had abandoned them, which wasn't gonna happen. He would calm himself and then rinse repeat the ne

and then rinse repeat the next time we hung out. Eventually I got sick and tired of that insecure bastard and I finally told him to stop and get over himself. I cant stand insecure people. Im not a psychiatrist there to do someone's therapy. Anyways, despite telling him to stop several times, he didn't. He kept doing it. He would even acknowledge that he was wrong to be excessively jealous. So my thing to you is that your theoretical approach to how a libra thinks or reflects the other person isn't as practical as my example. Life and relationship issues are way to complicated for that to be summed up too optimistically like that. According to you approach, he should have either addressed the issue by not doing it again and paying heed to what I was saying or he should have HONESTLy discussed it and said "I don't want you to be friends with guys! I want you to abandon all your friends for me". Both ways he was the one with issues.

Yeeeah, insecurity is the root of most of the stories that you hear here about the "crazy" variety here.

It's why you see decent ones self sabotage, the douche variety cheating/flirting/acting questionable in their relationships, and the confusing ones pulling their usual crap. It's all rooted in insecurity. They have to have many back ups because insecurity leaves them hating being alone. They feed lines of bs and try to save face because insecurity doesn't allow them to deal with the fact someone doesn't like them and thinks they're an asshole. Rinse and repeat.

Overall, they're cool people as a whole, but I think that insecurity is what makes life difficult for them.

@aqua, your example made me lol. I've had to deal with that before. Wtf is with that double standard? They can have a lot of female friends, but if you have a bunch of guy friends, watch out! That's not cool!

They don't like to communicate and when they do they will lie to u before they tell u the truth.

Posted by angiedbc457
They don't like to communicate and when they do they will lie to u before they tell u the truth.

+1
That is so,true right there, what the hell is so wrong with telling the dam truth

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Yeeeah, insecurity is the root of most of the stories that you hear here about the "crazy" variety here.

It's why you see decent ones self sabotage, the douche variety cheating/flirting/acting questionable in their relationships, and the confusing ones pulling their usual crap. It's all rooted in insecurity. They have to have many back ups because insecurity leaves them hating being alone. They feed lines of bs and try to save face because insecurity doesn't allow them to deal with the fact someone doesn't like them and thinks they're an asshole. Rinse and repeat.

Overall, they're cool people as a whole, but I think that insecurity is what makes life difficult for them.

@aqua, your example made me lol. I've had to deal with that before. Wtf is with that double standard? They can have a lot of female friends, but if you have a bunch of guy friends, watch out! That's not cool!

A strong plus 1 sista!! You just spoke my mind. It truly stems from insecurity, and if I knew that from the beginning about this sign then I would stay away romantically. I can deal with insecure friends, but not insecure lovers. As for that double standard, nobody has it worse than them. My ex would go clubbing and dance with random women who hit on him, he would go around jumping in hot tubs with random girls; meanwhile I was the bad, evil gf for having male friends, which he knew from the beginning.

Oh well, I get happy knowing that in our relationship's dying days, I gave him so much stress by confronting him on a daily basis (horror1) and yelling at him for every dumb nonsense (horror2), told him what a disliked worthless piece of shit that he was ( horror3). I guess i did everything not to do with a libra until I noticed that the man started balding. Lol. That's what you get for messing with an aqua! I read somewhere that an aqua and sag are libra's kryptonite. Yep!

Posted by TaurusNikki

Posted by angiedbc457
They don't like to communicate and when they do they will lie to u before they tell u the truth.

+1
That is so,true right there, what the hell is so wrong with telling the dam truth

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What's wrong with telling the truth? It's because big, bad, evil truth will make the other dislike you (libra). That deeply affects leebs.

libra men like to play.. they love mind games

yup.. perfect in playing lolz!

Insecure we may be, but a true Libra man would never show it. My own family tells me I don't have feelings, yet I feel it everytime they say it. There have been a few times where I thought "jealous", but I never said it out loud. Fact is, if we are so busy getting you to like us what purpose does it serve for us to let you know we are jealous? Maybe you had some immature Libras. Fact it, it takes a lot to get anything out of me and that is a true Libra. If everyone likes me, must be something wrong with you (or so the train of Libra thought goes).

Being one of the flirty signs, it better serves me to let you do your thing. I am a big one for trust because honestly me being nice is often looked at as flirting. I'll buy a round of shots without thinking that perhaps this means something. I was once called a lady's man for the mere fact that I didn't want someone to be by them-self when barred from a concert. I had no interest in the girl, but fact was everyone in the group left and I was last man standing. But because of it somehow I was a player.

No one tries to get to know who we are, they accept the image and then go with it. If you don't want to delve into the being of us, then you get the image and nothing more.

Posted by aquarius09


My ex would go clubbing and dance with random women who hit on him, he would go around jumping in hot tubs with random girls; meanwhile I was the bad, evil gf for having male friends, which he knew from the beginning.

lol

My ex wasn't really all that bad in that dept. Never had the double standard issue with guys vs girl friends. But I don't think he really met many of my friends.

However, one thing that happened at the beginning of the end was his insecure comments about things I didn't like about him. He just started making comments about how I didn't like this about him and I didn't like that, blah blah. Me- ...okay. Not necessarily, but okay. He smoked, and while I don't care for smoking, it wasn't an issue. If it was, I wouldn't have bothered dating him. He also made a comment about how I didn't like that he worked so much. Also not true. I never really had any issues with him working/going out and making money/doing well for himself. More power to him.

But because I didn't like smoking as a whole, nor did I care for the shitty, flaky attitude he was developing toward me because he was using work as a guise to not see me/I missed him due to him working so much lately, he twisted it around a bit and his insecurities really showed when he made those comments.

The last one I dated, I had a pretty strong inkling he was intimidated by the fact I had so many guy friends. It was lol worthy because I knew he had a lot of female friends and I had no issue with it. He'd flirt and constantly be texting them. But man, I had male friends. Couldn't quite handle that.

Also, something that I learned about the ex the other day kinda shined more light on who I was dealing with at the time.

I guess before we'd met, he was trying to get a new car. He had something older, a Honda whatnot. And he was convinced his car is why he wasn't getting women.

It's so fricken Libran to me because one - must have new, shiny, nice things! And two- he was so insecure with himself that he was sure that getting himself a new, fancy car would help snag him some ladies. The funny part is that when he did (me), I was so indifferent about his car (he was kinda flaunting/bragging about it). He also flaunted how much he made and again, I was indifferent. I wonder how much that knocked the wind out of his sails, haha.

Young guys...

It's little, but it gave me some major insight with the guy I was dealing with at the time and seems to be a large indicator as to why things went south, looking back on it. A lot of those issues seemed to be rooted in insecurity and he kinda self sabotaged everything with it.

Apparently he continues into a semi downward spiral with the ladies. I think he's just trying to find himself and he's in a period of growth/becoming his evolved version. ...it ain't pretty, haha.

They should quarantine young Libra guys from dating, I swear. This is the type you hear about most on these forums!

Posted by VenusStar

Posted by theGrinch
Insecure we may be, but a true Libra man would never show it. My own family tells me I don't have feelings, yet I feel it everytime they say it. There have been a few times where I thought "jealous", but I never said it out loud. Fact is, if we are so busy getting you to like us what purpose does it serve for us to let you know we are jealous? Maybe you had some immature Libras. Fact it, it takes a lot to get anything out of me and that is a true Libra. If everyone likes me, must be something wrong with you (or so the train of Libra thought goes).

Being one of the flirty signs, it better serves me to let you do your thing. I am a big one for trust because honestly me being nice is often looked at as flirting. I'll buy a round of shots without thinking that perhaps this means something. I was once called a lady's man for the mere fact that I didn't want someone to be by them-self when barred from a concert. I had no interest in the girl, but fact was everyone in the group left and I was last man standing. But because of it somehow I was a player.

No one tries to get to know who we are, they accept the image and then go with it. If you don't want to delve into the being of us, then you get the image and nothing more.

So... how do you act different from when "you're being nice" and when you're really interested. I've seen it before and it looks the same.

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Look at the effort. We are lazy by nature and will take the easy way almost every time. But when I'm interested in someone you see actual effort coming from me. I can easily do nothing and win hearts/minds. Buying a round when we're out is an easy thing to do and takes not an ounce of effort. When I'm interested though, you'll feel like we're one on one even if we're in a large group. Also, the biggest tell is when we're one on one. That's when you know your Libra is interested in you. I'll remember minor details that no one would care about. I'll make an effort (oh there goes effort again) to know your family, your friends, and other such things.

In my case, if we are never one on one I'm not interested. And when I say that I mean you know I made the effort to get us one on one. If it just so happens everyone went to the bathroom or a smoke and we happen to be one on

I agree Libra's are the biggest at playing period not just the mind but the heart as well.