Advice Needed

Here is my situation. It's a long story, so be prepared.

I just started a new job at the end of January. Everything is going *alright*, although I am miserable doing the job because it has turned out to be much more intensive than I expected it to be. I also feel that I have not been trained adequately or extensively enough to deal with the questions customers have for me, which are many and constant. I have been told both by my boss and by other coworkers that I am doing just fine and that this particular job takes time to get comfortable with because of the detailed nature of it (having to have extensive product and beauty knowlege and being able to give advice to customers about which products would be right for them based on their particular needs, hair/skin/nail types, etc).

To be perfectly honest, I hate the job most of the time. I know it hasn't been long enough for me to already feel this way, but it started in training when I started to realize what I'd gotten myself into. But, I thought I should give it some time, I'm still new, there's a lot to learn. I had my first night of closing all by myself last night, and although I thought I did okay, I've been asked to come in today (on my day off) so the manager can go over some things with me so that tomorrow when I close for the 2nd time, it will be fresh in my mind. That's fine I guess, I'd rather know what I'm doing for once rather than winging it and making mistakes (like I apparently did last night).

My self esteem is nothing now because of this job. I feel that I know nothing, customers treat me like s h i t
even when I go out of my way to do everything I can for them, and things are cropping up all the time that I haven't been trained on how to deal with.

Yesterday all day long, I worked with the biggest b i t c h you could possibly imagine. I am so easy to get along with at work--I can pretty much adapt to any personality type that's different from my own. But with her, I couldn't. She takes pleasure in seeing me flounder in front of customers. She laughs at me in front of them when I get confused or make a mistake and need her help. She left me all alone for the first time, at the busiest time of day, and as soon as she left, everything went wrong. The cash drawer wouldn't open, so I couldn't give a lady her change. She had to end up writing a check. She had about 35 items for me to ring up, and she wanted me to match a competitor's price on every single one of them. The other customers in the store were mad. People were putting down their baskets and leaving. Matching a competitor's price involves doing an override on every product you're lowering the price of, and it takes a long time. I kept apologizing to everyone for the wait and saying, "thank you for your patience, I'm going as fast as I possibly can", but people still left. Finally right when the lady leaves, my co-worker from hell comes back. Then, my mom apparently decided to come down and do some shopping (she also eavesdropped on my coworker to see how she was talking to me, and when I got home last night she was like, "that girl is the biggest b i t c h on the planet, it was everything I could do to keep from telling her so, too"). So, I introduced the co-worker to my mom and the co-worker was a total snobby b i t c h to her. Then, I rang up something wrong because it didn't have a SKU number on it and when I looked it up, and entered it into the computer, it was for a package of 12 of the item instead of just one (which is what the girl wanted, just one). I didn't know I rang it up wrong because on the "cheat sheet", it didn't say it was for a pkg of 12. She came back into the store, and with an attitude put it in my face and said, "you charged me (whatever) when it should be only 29 cents" or something. Co-worker said, "yeah, that Sku you entered is wrong, it's for a pkg of 12." Thanks for telling me that now, when you had no cu

I think you should be just as mean back to her as she is to you. But don't be obvious about it, be subtle about it, but be very very cold. When I'm in these kinds of situations, I don't know what happens to me, but I turn into the Hulk... And I know I lose my temper with people like that... But to me it's war, and she started it, so she'll have to pay...

OK, that's how I feel, but whether or not you should listen to that is undecided. You will get better at the job as you get more used to it. You are still very new. Just hang on there, and don't let the pressures and the cookiemonsteres get to you. Parallax has some good advice, but really, I'm sure it will turn out alright. After a while if you still feel bad, and you're sure that this place is not the place for you, then move on, but not before you're sure.

Okay, I'm back from talking to the boss.

First of all, I want to thank you all so much for your opinions...you don't realize how much it helps, you all have helped me through some real crises--I am eternally grateful. Love to you all!! 🙂

I think what I'm going to do, is I'm going to consolidate everything each of you said, and take a certain amount of each of your advice(s? is advises a word? LOL) and put a bit of everything into play. Eventually I will see what works best. Thank you all so much for your support, it really does mean a lot to me.

The boss, suprisingly, was about as nice and relaxed as she could have possibly been, and that made me feel a lot better. She even started laughing hysterically, and I do mean hysterically, because I had left exactly 100 dollars in the till, because I *thought* that when she said, "we always want to make sure there's a hundred dollars in the till at all times", that she meant AT ALL TIMES. LOL! So, thinking I was doing the right thing, I left it in the till overnight. Today she goes, "It was the cutest, most unusual thing ever, because when I came in I saw precisely a hundred dollars was left in the till, and I told my husband, 'that's the first time any new employee has done that. Usually they'll count it wrong...but nothing like this." LOL.

So...more on this lata, gotta go momentarily 🙂

thank you again all!!!

Hang in there girl. My girlfriend was in the exact position you are in now. She eventually quit b/c it all got too much for her. Para is right, self worth should not be equated with our employment, but unfortunately our emotions are on all the time and THIS is what effects our self worth. Stick at it for a little while, at least until you learn all there is to know as a sales assistant (guarantee that it won't take you too long). Be as polite to customers as you can...THEY REMEMBER! And if you find yourself in an unsure situation, just say to them, "It's my first day" and they usually sympathise with you on that. This cow you work with is quite common in most retail (there are always a few- you must learn to deal with them). But, once you start to get the hang on things and she is still nasty, maybe you should think of moving on at that stage. Don't compromise yourself for your boss, job or anyone. Ask if there are any cosmetic courses they can send you to. This may help. You have only been there a little while, seriously, it won't take you long to figure it all out. Once that happens, you will hate the job for entirely different reasons than you do now..lol. Good luck!

Okay, in conclusion, I'm giving everything one month from now. One month to get better. If I still hate it and feel miserable, I'm going to do what I know I can do well--office work! LOL. Seriously, I am a good receptionist/secretary, and paperwork and scheduling and talking to people on the phone are all things I actually enjoy. None of this retail crap. lol. No, I really will stay if things improve. I just need to stick it out, and realize that I cannot please everyone, and hope that the people who actually matter will treat me with respect. There are five women who work there including me, and three out of those five I get along very well with (including my boss). The other one, I have only worked with once so I can't say yet (though she seems kinda like the icky one I've been telling you about). So, it's not like it's all horrible all the time. I just don't think retail is my thing, that whole being treated like poo thing by customers just gets under my skin. It's bad enough being new, it's hard enough even when everything goes RIGHT, but when things go wrong AND you have a cookiemonstery coworker, it's like, "someone shoot me NOW".

I feel better though. A little bit. You all have helped with that. And guess what? My boss told me she's going to come down one more time tomorrow night just to be there in case I need help with anything, because she doesn't want to be the kind of boss who (Parallax, she used your exact words, weird huh!) "throws new people to the wolves".

So, I think she *totally* knew that she put me by myself too soon. I think she feels guilty about that.

Oh, and my lovely (not) coworker was in the back room when I first got there today, and miss Morgan, I followed your advice and was icy, icy, icy to her. I said, very flatly and without my usual expressiveness, "hello. How are you." More of a statement than a question (and more than I even should have given her). She goes, "ready for a nap". I said, "hm." lol. Brrrr. 🙂 And then I stood across the room from her in total complete silence until she left the room. She looked suprised at first when I said hello, I'm sure it's because usually I have a huge smile on my face and I'm very cheerful when I greet people. Not with her, not anymore.

Well my dears, until next time (hopefully there won't be a next time like this one!)... 🙂

woops, posted @ same time as you lawgoddess--let me read your post...

Thank you Lawgoddess! Excellent points, and I can't thank you enough for your support. I'm hanging in there...if it kills me, I'm giving it a month. lol. 🙂

Lawgoddess, I was going to tell you this earlier but I forgot, about the being friendly to customers thing. If there's one thing I know I do well, it's being nice to people. At my last "real" job when I was a receptionist, I actually had people who called my bosses to tell them how friendly I was. Some people would even ask when I was working so they could come in on my shifts and talk to me (it was a beauty salon). And I say that not to trumpet my own horn, but because that is the one thing I always go out of my way to do, much more so than the other girls. So, I'd like to think that much of the time my total and complete lack of actual knowlege is tempered by my friendliness with the customers--even on a horrible day like yesterday. lol. Let's hope. 😛

there. my f*king comp takes so long to load because of the modem..anyway. i think you should talk to her when you guys have time, not infront of the customers because then she'll have another reason to bash at you and this time, maybe infront of the manager and make some dumb ass excuse about how shes being rude and not paying attention to her job. So talk to her when you guys can have privacy. Tell her how its really not fair how shes treating you, since you know, you ARE new. And even if this is some gay joke that she pulls off of every person she worked with, tell her thats not an excuse to just treat you that way just becaus she "Feels like it". She obviously needs to mind her own buisness since you guys are both in this for the same reason. And if it gets ugly, kick her ASS!! LOL er..no. And besides, dont get insecure and stuff just because some b**tch cant deal with her own issues and customers are getting pissed off. I mean i'm pretty sure theres ppl out there that will give off responses like that because they're not impatient. But you are new so things will happen that you wont be too pleased with, so just keep on trying and learn. And in time, you'll get the hang of it. *hugs* ^^ dont worry phoenix. This is just another experience that you can get through. And if it just gets too extreme, quit and try and find another job that doesnt have b**ch mode in your face all the time. But maybe..just MAYBE.. you can become manager one day and then you can be like now youre working for ME b**tch!!!! no..-_- sorrae, getting all dramatic again. But anyway...*hugs* feel better pheonix, you know where to hit me up when ya need to talk (@email) ^^

thank you my dear Luz -- think I might email you about this later; I'm super tired right now though. In fact I fell asleep before my normal bedtime and woke up, which I never do...I never even take naps. I didn't even take them when I was little. I would just stare at the ceiling wondering when my naptime would be over.

lol, leave it to me to off on a random direction...thank you again, good night. 🙂

to *go* off that is

sleepy time

working at retail as well, i would tell you right now that you do not need people like that to show you that you will fail. treetrunk her for being such a total cookiemonster, aparently the superiority complex she has is a result of what she feels about you... she could feel threatened, that someone better would replace her. (just a thought).

phoenix, i like your idea of giving it a month. it is wise other than just giving up on something. its just not so hopeless.

you have to understand also that its not worth the minimum wage to stay and have a condescending co-worker right beside you just because you are new to the job. quit if it becomes worst. OR (a BIG ASS 'OR')you can prove her wrong by being the best that you can be and in the process make her feel stupid... i have done all of this, and i have suceeded. through it i gained respect with my fellow co workers, and to my corporate authorities.
don't be afraid to confront her with your frustrations, (in a professional manner).

if it doesn't end well you can tell us her address and we can kick her ass for you. lol

lol, thank you M-Ayson, I really appreciate it. Just so you know by the way, I do plan to email you, just literally have not had enough time. There's never enough time for anything now. And when there is, I'm really sleepy. lol....but yeah, just so you know, it isn't that I haven't wanted to talk to ya. 🙂

U huh. sure. lol

alot has changed BTW.

well, email me if you get a chance

NO! you email me first. lol

No, you first, because it's not fair, you already know a lot of what's going on with me cuz of what I've been posting! 😛

what... its like the first time i checked in like um... WHEN YOU LAST EMAILED ME that was like forever damit! lol

pshaw, pshaw, pshaw...you totally know more stuff about me than I know about you, therefore the ball is in your court dear friend 🙂

what? wow! i know more about you?... you are a conundrum, an enigma, and a mystery to me. lol

jesus, i promise i will tell all if you email first.

hmmm. If you insist, but realize that it may take me a few days to actually get one completely written and sent off.

I'm a "conigmery".

lol

I don't know M (something) A...

It's up to you. I know my procrastination is frustrating; my apologies.

Please forgive?

aw you forgot?... its a sign, i should quit.

I didn't forget; I have it written down somewhere.

It's freaking long; cut me some slack. lol

we might as well save dxp the threads to the topics and turn on your aim or yahoo what do you say?

well, that would be fun, and I wish I could, but I have to work tomorrow and I really should have gone to bed like 2 hours ago. I have to work a full shift, too. 😢

I'm sorry my dear friend.

i understand? um... actually no.

kiddin. sure. go to sleep, come to think about it sure i understand.

sure ill quit this silly game and email you... you win

does that mean you really do understand? I have not enough mental energy for unraveling mysteries right now...lol.

check your email in like 10 mins if you are still awake?

okay...i'm going to bed now...goodnight...talk to you later and thank you for your support mr i-sun, it's very much appreciated. Knew I could count on my scorpiolibra friend. lol.

🙂

hahaha, we posted at the same time.

Yes I will, if I'm still awake. As long as I don't rest my head on the computer desk I should be fine. 😛

im done read it

Phoenix, I'm away at the moment but i had a quick look at the boards and saw your msg. I just have to say one thing, when you work in a job that isn't right for you, with s h i t t y small minded people, it is bad for your self-esteem. I have done this type of work before and it was demoralising. These types of positions are filled with uneducated (not being snobby, but it's true) or small-minded people who are jealous and threatened by anyone they know is better than they are.

I'll tell you one thing, i ditched a job like this to do what i really wanted to do and so far it's worked out. I make a living from that now and am currently using that job/position to put myself through university so i can have something else to move on to later.

The thing is, you have to look at jobs as a stepping stone and always be one step ahead. Think to yourself what do you REALLY want to do? What you really want to do is usually what you are good at or what you really 'enjoy'. I would then use this job to launch myself into that career. Ie. You could designate a certain amount of money to do a course or further yourself in some way.

An example. When i worked in a mundane, deadend job, in my spare time i was developing my business. As soon as my business started to earn enough to support me, i left the job. I took other jobs though (while doing the business) but when i felt even more secure i realised i didn't need to do these dead end jobs.

These things take time and the idea is to have a dead end job that is low maintenance and that you can exploit (ie. take on as many weekend shift as possible to get the higher pay rates), for your own needs.

Use it as a stepping stone and remember that there are higher and greater things in stall for you. Look to the horizon and not to the wall in front of you. Always remember to keep the bigger picture in mind. Can't really talk right now but i'll post more when i get home.

Hey Libragirl 🙂

Thanks you very much for your perspective on things. It makes me feel like a lot less of a loser to hear other people's experiences and realize that I'm really not that alone in feeling this way.

Interesting enough, the girl who was awful to me that I was talking about earlier, had been unusually kiss-ass to me ever since that day. Everyone else has been sort of that way too, and it's making me very suspicious, I almost get the feeling that they knew I was not a happy camper. I don't know how that would be possible, because I went to great lengths to hide it, but perhaps "I'm Quitting This Crappy Job" was written all over my face or something. My boss has spent extra time training me more in-depth, and like I said this chick has been weirdly nice and respectful to me the last couple shifts I've worked (luckily, I wasn't working only with her...that comes next week, fun fun!). That will be the true test--how she acts when the boss isn't there and it's just her and I one on one.

I definitely understand and like your idea about treating this as simply a stepping stone; and I see what you mean about exploiting it, as bad as that might sound. It makes sense. I don't really see myself making a career of this. It would be nice to be really good at it. That's what I want, in the short term, is to get really good at it and blow them all out of the water. It's bugging me that I continually discover more stuff I *can't* do. lol. What's weird is that I don't even *want* to know how; it's just that I feel this overwhelming desire to learn how so that I can show that I'm not this incapable twit who can't do anything.

These types of positions are filled with uneducated (not being snobby, but it's true) or small-minded people who are jealous and threatened by anyone they know is better than they are.

You couldn't be more right about that Libragirl. The only thing is, I don't know how they could be jealous of me, because I really don't know how to do anything yet really. lol. Maybe I'm giving off a "I will have your job" vibe, which is so the opposite of how I feel. I don't even want *my* job. lol. I didn't know what I was getting myself into when I signed on, is what it comes down to. I didn't realize it would be so in-depth. Well, now I know. So I have to decide what I'm going to do. I can either give up and never know whether I could have done it (and having a tendency to obsess about such things, I'm thinking that wouldn't be the smartest course of action to take)...or I can stick it out and deal with the bullbutter as it comes, and assert myself in small ways as needed, and get good.

I've been thinking about it, and you want to know what I really want to do? What I really want to do, is write. Yep, write. But, let's be realistic--how likely is it that I will make a career out of it? Not bloody likely, as they say over there in England. 😛

Thank you again, hope you're doing well, talk to you soon my dear...

when i'm sleepy, i say things like, "thanks you very much".

🙂

(btw, if it wasn't clear, i know you're not from England, but I'm saying......oh, hell, you know what I meant. lol)

your boss wants you! lol.

My boss is a woman, who is married to a man.

lol.

That would just be way too creepy for phoenix

hey, you don't know that... there was a couple who stayed in their relationship as husband and wife for 20 years, now the wife opens up to him and says she actually swung the other way.

so... you don't know>>>>>>LOL

Oh, I know. I know, or I'll puke. lol.

im kiddin

you have talent and she sees that...

its called dedication. ;p

sorry about that long ass email. lol

my talents thus far:

-"Would you like your receipt with you, or in the bag?"

-"I'm not sure, let me get my manager to answer your questions."

-Cleaning

-"Good Morning (afternoon; evening), ***** Beauty Supply and Equipment, this is *******, how may I help you? I'm not sure, can you hold please while I get my manager?"

lol

np about the email; just gotta process it all into my weary brain before I respond 🙂

that is pure dedication to dodging all the questions...

that is TALENT!!!!

lol
cuttin you some slack, cuz you are new

its still dedication to calling the manager lol

LOL, thank you

I am dedicated to not giving the wrong advice or making butter up just to placate the customer (i've seen some of them do that, and then later the customer comes back in and complains to the manager about being told the wrong thing. lol, i refuse to make stuff up just to sound informed)