Can chaos produce peace?

I've been wondering if the illusion of chaos produces peace of mind.

For instance, when I feel a change is needed, I make disasters. My closet was a heaping walk in of clean and dity clothes and I realized I couldn't stand it. So, I cleared out my closet and put all my clothes in various piles in my room on the bed, dresser, armoire.. I started making my closet functional again.

But I didn't finish it. Instead, I slept on my couch for weeks operating like a freeloader.

Last night, I slept in a sleeping bag on my sunroom porch.. Woke up refreshed and determined and finished my closet. ...

Took about a month to achieve this calm, peace. Talk about procrastination, right lol.


Do other people do this? Make their life barely livable until they are forced to change it? Or create situations where you don't have any other choice??


If it was just my closet that needed to be cleaned, then why go through this weird ritual? Is it possible I threw my routine out of whack so when the pieces are put back together I'd "feel better?" (Like how you can't appreciate sunshine without rain?)

I've been doing this for years and I find it odd. If not, utter madness.

I've done with with all areas of my life. Subconsciously. Half of me believes it's laziness. Or a stubborn mentality.