I bought a mountain bike

Now I know what you're thinking. "Soul, who da fuck cares about your mountain bike?"

déjà vu anyone?

I do. I love the nature, the forest, and everything about those things. Lets face it, walking sucks and as I kid I loved trail riding. It's also an easier method to avoid dogs and dumb little kids asking 10000 questions to what you're doing.

So this method is flawless. I'll ride the bike till I lose enough weight to use the kayak, then I'll have 2 things to keep me active!

With that being said, I'm off to the trails!

...I'll be waiting for a harem in front of those two items.

"Now I know what you're thinking. "Soul, who da fuck cares about you getting prostitutes?

déjà vu anyone?

I do. I love women I don't have to trust, sex, and everything about those things. Lets face it, no sex sucks and as a I kid I loved experiencing boners. It's also an easier method to avoid intimacy and dumb friends asking 10000 question about not getting laid.

So this method is flawless. I'll ride these women til I lose enough weight to use the bike and the kayak, or until I die. Then I'll have more endurance for the 2 things to keep me active!

With that being said, I'm off making phonecalls!"

P.S. I am gently teasing, don't go Scorpio Moon on this.

+1 for getting outdoors

-1 for matching the color of the helmet to the bike

Posted by starlover
Good for you!

How is the weight loss coming along?

It's going great. Friday I walked 2 mile. Saturday I felt sore in the legs so I only walked 1 mile. Then Sunday I pushed myself to the limit and went 3 mile, and yesterday I bought a bike and went 2 mile on it. I'm hoping I lost at least 1 pound by now, But I'm trying to wait till Friday to weigh myself.

Posted by Quantum
+1 for getting outdoors

-1 for matching the color of the helmet to the bike

I can't help it. That spacific helmet was on sale for half price, and green is my favorite color so it worked out lol.

Posted by Damnata
...I'll be waiting for a harem in front of those two items.

"Now I know what you're thinking. "Soul, who da fuck cares about you getting prostitutes?

déjà vu anyone?

I do. I love women I don't have to trust, sex, and everything about those things. Lets face it, no sex sucks and as a I kid I loved experiencing boners. It's also an easier method to avoid intimacy and dumb friends asking 10000 question about not getting laid.

So this method is flawless. I'll ride these women til I lose enough weight to use the bike and the kayak, or until I die. Then I'll have more endurance for the 2 things to keep me active!

With that being said, I'm off making phonecalls!"

P.S. I am gently teasing, don't go Scorpio Moon on this.

Impressive.

Sex is a great way to burn calories and stay in shape. If there's one thing I'm not getting from this however it's laid. And prostitutes are so damn expensive... If only it could be free. I do have a soundproof bomb shelter deep in my basement. Wait a second, you might be on to something with all this!

😛

Posted by Soul

Posted by Quantum
+1 for getting outdoors

-1 for matching the color of the helmet to the bike

I can't help it. That spacific helmet was on sale for half price, and green is my favorite color so it worked out lol.

click to expand

Okay I'll take away the -1 since you're shopping for bargains.

-1 for not having streamers
-2 for not having those light-up things on the spokes
-3 for not having a basket of little Kittens on the front

Congrats on your bike! 😄

This reminds me. I need to get my kayak out and get it cleaned and ready for fishing.

Posted by starlover

Posted by Quantum
This reminds me. I need to get my kayak out and get it cleaned and ready for fishing.

Is that a metaphor?

Lol

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No!

I really need to get it out on the reservoir and river.

😢

I heard hang gliding is pretty cool

@Soul should totally decorate that kayak like a Viking longboat and cruise the lake with a menacing glare and dat beard.

Soul's got a bike
You can ride it if you want
It's got a basket, a bell that rings
And things to make it look good

😄

WOOOO!
Feels great!

The only real problem I had was the seat. I can think of hundreds of jokes that describe how it made my ass feel,

I'm about to head to dicks to see about getting a fat person seat, and fill out the warrente incase I break the poor thing.

Posted by Quantum
@Soul should totally decorate that kayak like a Viking longboat and cruise the lake with a menacing glare and dat beard.

Lol! I'll sneak up behind people and blow a horn then say a quote about war from the Viking era.

Posted by Soul

Posted by Quantum
@Soul should totally decorate that kayak like a Viking longboat and cruise the lake with a menacing glare and dat beard.

Lol! I'll sneak up behind people and blow a horn then say a quote about war from the Viking era.

click to expand

Indeed.

Paddle up to bikini-clad college girls and ask if they need pillaging.

LOOOOOOL 😆 DIDN'T U BUY A KAYAK OR SOMETHING 😆 GOOD FOR U!!

Lol, this reminds me of domino's weight loss thread, back in the day 🙂

Good for you Soul 🙂

Posted by Nevermore

Posted by Soul
The only real problem I had was the seat. I can think of hundreds of jokes that describe how it made my ass feel,

I'm about to head to dicks to see about getting a fat person seat, and fill out the warrente incase I break the poor thing.

Not sure in America, but if they have a seat that has a more width than a regular one.. or some sort of that comfort pillow cover seat.

If they both don't have it.. deal with it.

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In America you can bet they have a fat person version of everything lol. Including candy bars.

Here's a comparison of the newly installed seat vs the factory one.

I might use the factory seat some day, but for now there's now way in hell 270 pounds will fit on that seat Lmao