WELL...this isn't creepy at allll

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iceredrobot
@iceredrobot
14 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 6 · Posts: 3351 · Topics: 102
NONE of them believe in astrology. All student under 21


Capricorn: I need a hug
Cancer: I can't decide whether you should live or die
Capricorn: DIE BITCH DIE. Go on. Have some balls. Kill me now, while you can.
Cancer. You??ve called my bluff. Damn.


Virgo: Man masturbates, woman sues (link). You couldn't make it up
Sag: I can only suppose that he first asked her whether or not she desired a 'white' Christmas; and she, suffice it to say, replied in the affirmative.
Pisces1: How can you not mean to do it?!?! What - was he just holding it and the safety wasn't on and it just went off or something...?
Pisces2: Don't tell me it hasn't happened to you before.


Virgo: Happy Birthday!!! Congratulations on your not being dead yet. Here is your present, a truck full of dogs.
Cancer: Can I roast them for lunch?


Pisces: How do you pronounce "Jorges Luis Borges"?
Gemini: Jor-jay Lou-ee Bor-jay
Pisces: Jorjayborjay pudding and pie
Gemini: Don't tell me it's one of those "Hor-hay Lou-ee Bor-hay"?
Pisces: closer, yes.
Gemini: Do I win a prize?
Pisces: I corrected my interviewers at UCL who mispronounced it. Maybe thats why I didn't get an offer.
Pisces: I'll give it to you tomorrow. It's my cock.
Gemini: No i asked for a prize You're SO MEAN TO ME!


Leo: Come on lets have a really good go at each other
Cancer: You dastardly man! *Bitch slaps*
Leo: oww get you luvvie
Cancer: That my friend is homophobic, I'm suing you for the cost of the depression treatment that such a blatant insult triggered.
Leo: well that will only be about 10p if that
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iceredrobot
@iceredrobot
14 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 6 · Posts: 3351 · Topics: 102
Virgo: (Cancer) needs a woman. Seriously guys. I've seen them, they are swollen and bright red. His eye keeps twitching whenever Carol Vorderman comes on tv. Any sort of receptacle would do really, I think he would even go ginger he is that desperate. Can someone advise plz? I've tried throwing cold water on him but that just makes him hump the fridge.
Cancer: My being discussed seems to afford a pretext to return - a gossamer-thin one perhaps - in order to defend against the impugning of my character.


Cancer M: Want some meaningless sex?
Cancer F: Does it involve cuddling after or can I just throw you out when i'm done?
Cancer M: But of course, the latter.
Cancer F: One ishhh a litredtrerte intoxicarteshzfrd rightb now. and wo. ukldm appreciatena good fucshingg
Cancer M: Only a little? And thank God for the ignore list.


Anonymous: what's a hymem?
Virgo: It's like 'keep fresh seal' on a jar of marmelade.
Sagittarius: Does the "Do not use if this seal is already broken." warning still apply?

____________________________________________________________


You know in hindsight this is in fact, verrry creepy haha😛
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iceredrobot
@iceredrobot
14 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 6 · Posts: 3351 · Topics: 102
Thread Title: Condoms too small

Cancer: yeah just get some bigger ones its fine. how big is your cock though i mean it does have to be pretty big to render regular condoms redundant
Virgo: I usually find they are a little bit too big 😢 Oh no wait sorry, that's sleeping bags.
Libra: yay another excuse to show off u have a large penis, or maybe it's small and you're insecure.
——: You do realise that you can just take ordinary sized condoms and simply cut the ends off of them and then sellotape them together to create a custom-length sheath?


Thread Title:swallowing I don't know why I'm stuck in the relationship forums

Anonymous: Are there any health implications with swallowing semen? Good and bad. Just curious, thanks
Gem/Cancer: good complete protein source..
———: Try and find yourself a nice vegetarian guy..it really does taste better!
Virgo: I'm a vegetarian and you may have just made me curious about something I should never be curious about. I'll have to exercise a lot of restraint.
Gemini: Rather bizarrely, with one ex mine caused a rash on her skin...has never happened in any other occasion though, so wouldn't worry about it...


So many great quotes but most people state their star sign as "don't believe" Shame.
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iceredrobot
@iceredrobot
14 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 6 · Posts: 3351 · Topics: 102
Thread - 9 year kid steals a car third time - Bad mum blames playstation


Virgo1: 9 year olds are way too retarded to learn to drive from a Playstation game. The mum needed some scapegoat.
Taurus: Bad parenting/wrong crowd/****ed up kid.
Cancer: GTA doesn't exactly give you enumerated instructions whereby you are able to steal a car.
Virgo2: Of course it does, idiot. He just walked into the road and pressed 'Y'.



Thread - Valentines Thread 😄

Cancer: I just want to express my eternal love for Ron
Libra: Traitor!😕
Cancer: But... he has just got this overwhelming aura about him. I couldn't resist...
Libra: *shuffles off dejectedly* It's cool, I get it... I'm not your type😉
Cancer: I'm afraid my type is a complusive rep. whore and spammer only...
Libra: So what's the problem then?
Cancer: None whatsoever 😛 Can we build a totem to Ron?
Scorpio: I'm going to take this opportunity to go and die alone in the corner
Pisces: Oh what the hell. This is a bandwagon that needs to be jumped on. I'd just like to express my eternal love to (Gemini). You rock my world.
Gemini: aww, i love (Pisces) so much *followed by a million smilies*
Cancer: You should stick a warning to diabetics on that post
Gemini: Yes. too much love can kill you.
Cancer: Prehaps, or prehaps make your feet drop off.
Taurus: Or make you blind.
Gemini: Yes. Im in no danger of losing my feet.
Taurus: I tried sending myself a card, then giving myself amnesia so that when it arrived, I'd have no idea who it was from, and feel all warm inside. Thing is, I forgot it was Valentine's Day, so all I felt was confused.
cancer: Cry yourself to sleep tonight.

Awww I miss posting there xD
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RealTalk
@RealTalk
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 4558 · Topics: 66
Posted by iceredrobot
Posted by DominOo
that sounds like some boring people :/


HDU!!😛 Those guys were rock stars to me back then xD

I think it helped that they were young and pretty carefree. People get pretty boring after 21😭
click to expand





Hahahaha...nah. Shit gets REAL after 21. These kids are in college or living off their parents. They can afford to be carefree. No responsibility & they don't know shit about life. When they start to carry their own shit & pay their OWN bills & are able to walk around butt ass naked in their own place...the conversation will be a bit different. Please girl, after 21? A person is just getting started. 😉
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RealTalk
@RealTalk
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 4558 · Topics: 66
Posted by LadyScorpP
Posted by RealTalk
Posted by iceredrobot
HEY!! No raining on my creepy thread!!😛

Students in the UK are different from US college kids - if television has taught me anything😕



Of course not...Rain? Nah...just a little hail. 😄

It won't sting, I promise.



To your profile question, I viewed it once 🙂

Are you a Scorpio?
click to expand




No why? Because I mentioned something about stinging? Had zero to do with a scorp...VIRGO ALL DAY.