caligula
@caligula
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Asking for Help
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I also want to add that maybe the inability to ask for help is in part due to the fact that by nature, Pisces isn't an action-oriented sign? In addition, when things get heavy, Pisces is unable to swim in a straight line. They seem to leisurely swim about in every direction and where they may eventually reach their destination, they path they've chosen isn't necessarily logical or efficient.
I brought up the instance with my bff because I feel like it's indicative of the fish that's zig-zagging and the frustration on behalf of the partner who's witnessing it. When she discusses these types of conflicts that she has with her Lib, I imagine him yelling at the top of his lungs, "STRAIGHT LINE! STRAIGHT LINE!"
With a Pisces, it's as if a partner has one of two choices, leave breadcrumbs in a straight line or open the closed door and wait for the fish to swim through. The breadcrumb route allows the Pisces to get where they need to go on their own and in their own time, but while they're swimming from morsel, their partner can often get frustrated with time it takes for the fish to consume each step. I think this is when a more action-oriented partner feels the needs to jump in the water...with or without permission and pave the way. Right or wrong, the partner was trying to help. The question; however is, which is the better course?
Does a Pisces need someone who recognizes the need for help and just does it because it needs to be done?
I brought up the instance with my bff because I feel like it's indicative of the fish that's zig-zagging and the frustration on behalf of the partner who's witnessing it. When she discusses these types of conflicts that she has with her Lib, I imagine him yelling at the top of his lungs, "STRAIGHT LINE! STRAIGHT LINE!"
With a Pisces, it's as if a partner has one of two choices, leave breadcrumbs in a straight line or open the closed door and wait for the fish to swim through. The breadcrumb route allows the Pisces to get where they need to go on their own and in their own time, but while they're swimming from morsel, their partner can often get frustrated with time it takes for the fish to consume each step. I think this is when a more action-oriented partner feels the needs to jump in the water...with or without permission and pave the way. Right or wrong, the partner was trying to help. The question; however is, which is the better course?
Does a Pisces need someone who recognizes the need for help and just does it because it needs to be done?
I think you touched on something important in the whole line of straight lines, for sure.
Asking for help is kind of up and down. It is all very circumstantial for me, based on where I sit with the issue at hand. Am I ready to deal with this. Have I figured out what all my options are, what makes the most sense. Can I make the decision. Emotions totally get in the way of all of this too. So some things that others might deem need to be dealt with, or I should be asking for help on, I may just not be ready yet. So, do I expect people to know what I want? Hell no, because I likely don't know what I want.
With that in mind though - back to the straight line theory: I think we definitely need a partner that is willing and able to lead. Because otherwise, as you said.... we're apt to go in circles, diagonals, jump out of the ocean, and end up caught in a fake castle with one room, basically overwhelmed with possibility. Personal decisions/preferences, definitely not my forte.
Asking for help is kind of up and down. It is all very circumstantial for me, based on where I sit with the issue at hand. Am I ready to deal with this. Have I figured out what all my options are, what makes the most sense. Can I make the decision. Emotions totally get in the way of all of this too. So some things that others might deem need to be dealt with, or I should be asking for help on, I may just not be ready yet. So, do I expect people to know what I want? Hell no, because I likely don't know what I want.
With that in mind though - back to the straight line theory: I think we definitely need a partner that is willing and able to lead. Because otherwise, as you said.... we're apt to go in circles, diagonals, jump out of the ocean, and end up caught in a fake castle with one room, basically overwhelmed with possibility. Personal decisions/preferences, definitely not my forte.
There's a finesse to the situation though (which I think is probably where the pisces' husband caught some flack). To make us aware of our incapability to pick a path sometimes, is almost tough to swallow because we know we're capable, and I think I'd feel like the person (handling it without the finesse) is telling me they don't think I am capable.
Also, I think there are "areas" that each person has hang ups about asking for help with. So with some things, we absolutely don't want/need the help. And others we need it, but can't admit to it, or haven't gotten clear on what we actually want yet. Further making us more impossible to deal with sometimes 🙂 I will add though, I don't think I'd ever expect someone to "know" what to do for me, nor hold it against them (support and understanding is all that is needed). But when more action oriented signs need to see progress, I can see how frustrating we could be if they didn't step in and take charge a bit.
Also, I think there are "areas" that each person has hang ups about asking for help with. So with some things, we absolutely don't want/need the help. And others we need it, but can't admit to it, or haven't gotten clear on what we actually want yet. Further making us more impossible to deal with sometimes 🙂 I will add though, I don't think I'd ever expect someone to "know" what to do for me, nor hold it against them (support and understanding is all that is needed). But when more action oriented signs need to see progress, I can see how frustrating we could be if they didn't step in and take charge a bit.
Posted by deezie
There's a finesse to the situation though (which I think is probably where the pisces' husband caught some flack). To make us aware of our incapability to pick a path sometimes, is almost tough to swallow because we know we're capable, and I think I'd feel like the person (handling it without the finesse) is telling me they don't think I am capable.
Also, I think there are "areas" that each person has hang ups about asking for help with. So with some things, we absolutely don't want/need the help. And others we need it, but can't admit to it, or haven't gotten clear on what we actually want yet. Further making us more impossible to deal with sometimes 🙂 I will add though, I don't think I'd ever expect someone to "know" what to do for me, nor hold it against them (support and understanding is all that is needed). But when more action oriented signs need to see progress, I can see how frustrating we could be if they didn't step in and take charge a bit.
thanks!
i think that in the eyes of another, this is why Pisces gets the "lazy, aimless, lacks ambition" monickers. as a sign, they are capable and driven, but how long can you stare at a fish tank? sure, fish are beautiful and watching them swim about is nice, but hey, i just dumped some flakes in your tank, why aren't you eating?
and yes, for the action-oriented partner/friend/family of a pisces, it is VERY frustrating to witness someone so capable do things in their own time or not at all...especially if the delay further complicates the issue or if it's something that can be done fairly quickly/easily.
i do understand that when a fish is swimming about and delaying a decision it's because they haven't fully cemented their choice. thing is, where the consideration of possibilities and angles is a good thing, it's not always the best course of action. i mean consider the example i gave. why didn't she apply herself? i mean, she hated the job she had and at the end of the day, they either call her in for an interview or they don't. either she goes or she doesn't. either she gets an offer and accepts it or she doesn't. but none of this can happen if she doesn't take a few minutes to submit her resume. i think that's what frustrated the Libra. all she had to do was send in her resume and even if it's not a job she wanted, oh well, don't answer the call back, but doing nothing should never be th
^all she had to do was send in her resume and even if it's not a job she wanted, oh well, don't answer the call back, but doing nothing should never be the default and yet, "doing nothing until forced or until it feels right" seems to be the only way to get Pisces re-acts.
react^ jesus, i full of fumbles today.
haha still miles above most caligula!
Love the fish tank thing. Hilarious and true.
I wonder sometimes (of myself) if I'm too comfortable with misery, that misery itself is not enough to spark action.
In the situation of your bff... if I place myself in that situation - I start to question a bunch of different things that I imagine a lot of people handle a lot better. Things such as: well if I don't know I want anything to do with the position, why would I apply. What if I am offered and accept it, and I hate it, or it causes problem with me and my husband, or, or, or. The box is 1% of our thought, and then 99% is outside of. The realm of possibilities of where the brain can go with something that seems so cut and dry to others, is probably where we get the "dreamy" label. Which is a bit of a misnomer in my opinion. It's an extended vision of all possibility, not necessarily founded in the clouds of impossibility and ridiculousness.
My goodness. I'm losing even myself here... apologies!
That's a great example though, I got myself so twisted (where did I put that damn focus—?) in my own thoughts, that I lose the question, and then I'm allllll too willing to just bail on completing the thought.
Love the fish tank thing. Hilarious and true.
I wonder sometimes (of myself) if I'm too comfortable with misery, that misery itself is not enough to spark action.
In the situation of your bff... if I place myself in that situation - I start to question a bunch of different things that I imagine a lot of people handle a lot better. Things such as: well if I don't know I want anything to do with the position, why would I apply. What if I am offered and accept it, and I hate it, or it causes problem with me and my husband, or, or, or. The box is 1% of our thought, and then 99% is outside of. The realm of possibilities of where the brain can go with something that seems so cut and dry to others, is probably where we get the "dreamy" label. Which is a bit of a misnomer in my opinion. It's an extended vision of all possibility, not necessarily founded in the clouds of impossibility and ridiculousness.
My goodness. I'm losing even myself here... apologies!
That's a great example though, I got myself so twisted (where did I put that damn focus—?) in my own thoughts, that I lose the question, and then I'm allllll too willing to just bail on completing the thought.
Sorry, like you said, it was her dream job (or at least perceived, and perhaps doubt entered her mind on that matter). Luckily she is happy, and it all worked out - but perhaps tentativeness of ending the perception came about, and immobilized her into acting on the dream?
why would he throw it in her face?
IF he did throw it in her face, she would, in part, deserve it. in THIS particular instance, he mentioned her to HR. he told her about mentioning. he waited for MONTHS and during those months, she did nothing with respect to this particular lead. after seeing her DAILY frustration for MONTHS, he sent her resume. he HELPED her and what's wrong with that? a "thank you" is in order, no?
at the end of the day, he didn't go on the interview, SHE did. she got her education. she has the job experience and yes, SHE got the job, but ignoring the catalyst that made it happen and acting like a total shit because "i do very well on my own" is not an issue for the person who lends the assistance.
so, if someone hands out your resume, keep in mind, YOU CHOSE to go on the interview. YOU CHOSE to accept the job. and YOU CHOSE the consequences of accepting it. to then in turn say it's THEIR FAULT for your having a miserable job, well then, who's throwing what in whom's face?
IF he did throw it in her face, she would, in part, deserve it. in THIS particular instance, he mentioned her to HR. he told her about mentioning. he waited for MONTHS and during those months, she did nothing with respect to this particular lead. after seeing her DAILY frustration for MONTHS, he sent her resume. he HELPED her and what's wrong with that? a "thank you" is in order, no?
at the end of the day, he didn't go on the interview, SHE did. she got her education. she has the job experience and yes, SHE got the job, but ignoring the catalyst that made it happen and acting like a total shit because "i do very well on my own" is not an issue for the person who lends the assistance.
so, if someone hands out your resume, keep in mind, YOU CHOSE to go on the interview. YOU CHOSE to accept the job. and YOU CHOSE the consequences of accepting it. to then in turn say it's THEIR FAULT for your having a miserable job, well then, who's throwing what in whom's face?
Posted by deezie
perhaps tentativeness of ending the perception came about, and immobilized her into acting on the dream?
i have debated on whether that's it.
i have heavy 12th house influences myself and there are times when i KNOW what i need to do and KNOW that inaction is only making things worse and yet, i passively watch the house crumble because i just don't FEEL like dealing with it or i get consumed with the "what-ifs" and begin living in my head.
with my bff, i have told her on a number of occasions that since i've known her, the only times she's acted directly is when her hand has been forced. i've told her that it's as if she needs a sledgehammer to change/act...which is funny given she's not a fixed sign and has little/no fixed in her cart.
on a side note, if i had to put piscean thought (especially those with sun conjunct mercury) into a pictorial, i'd use the following:
a pisces who has yet to make a decision decides instead to...
and...
a pisces who claims to know exactly what they're doing, but has accomplished nothing toward achieving a goal...
Posted by 3588PISCES
I can do the same with you and based on people I know of you sign and can point out all your signs weakness, and horrible annoying habits. But I may make myself look stupid because you may be a different better, smarter person.
wtf?! look BITCH! kill the whiny horseshit and self-aggrandizing.
who gives a hot damn that you can point out a negative in my sign? news fucking flash, EVERY sign has negatives and your inability to ACCEPT and RECOGNIZE your own is what makes you a weak ass fucker. the fact that you keep talking about how independent you are is a SIGN that you're weak. assuming you're over the age of 18, you're supposed to be independent you insignificant little shit.
oh and you go through hard times cause you're a dumbafuck and the reason why no one helps when you ask is because no one likes you. you hear that? NO ONE LIKES YOU! now go do something that's considered positive in the realm of pisces...smoke some crack.
what in all holy hell is a fuckin "PC Tech—" lol at people who go to "colleges" that advertise on Spike.
that's all i bothered to skim and on that note, you can go back to being insignificant, little and shitty.
that's all i bothered to skim and on that note, you can go back to being insignificant, little and shitty.
nope, have no idea what one is. i don't know what a "Sandwich Artist" is either for that matter so I decided to look up what a "PC Technician" is and here's what i found...
http://www.glassdoor.com/Salaries/pc-technician-salary-SRCH_KO0,13.htm
oooooh, so THAT's why you really do things on your own. i knew i smelled something when you entered...poverty.
http://www.glassdoor.com/Salaries/pc-technician-salary-SRCH_KO0,13.htm
oooooh, so THAT's why you really do things on your own. i knew i smelled something when you entered...poverty.
uhm, no one is like me so get a fucking grip. anyhoo, i posted a topic and you degenerates have derailed my thread.
we have an accord.
you are indeed worthless.
ta!
you are indeed worthless.
ta!
Posted by 3588PISCES
I dont want to argue with you or anyone else. lets drop this and you guys carry on with this thread.
guppy v. barracuda
dishonesty v. honesty
passivity v. tactical action
delusion v. examining actual possibilities
^that's what this thread was about and unfortunately, a little fishy got lost, jumped into a green pasture and look!...there's sushi!
Hmmmmm.... interesting ......
Preying on a fish you think is "weak" .....smh
Caligula. You did come here asking for help ..... I think deezie helped .....
So ermmm..... keep it moving..... and take your sidekick with you....
Or you can address your issues with me and I will be glad to accommodate you....
Your choice.....
Online bullies make me laugh..... grow the fuck up ......no one is scared of you
But oh how I do like to entertain...... and the "old me" wants to come out and play so bad.....
Funny how people take "kindness " for weakness ......smh
Preying on a fish you think is "weak" .....smh
Caligula. You did come here asking for help ..... I think deezie helped .....
So ermmm..... keep it moving..... and take your sidekick with you....
Or you can address your issues with me and I will be glad to accommodate you....
Your choice.....
Online bullies make me laugh..... grow the fuck up ......no one is scared of you
But oh how I do like to entertain...... and the "old me" wants to come out and play so bad.....
Funny how people take "kindness " for weakness ......smh
FYI, I'm at work atm so forgive me if I don't answer you right way...
Please be patient with me......LOL
Please be patient with me......LOL
Lmao .... are you serious?
I don't need a "fan club" or sidekicks .....
Notice.... I'm getting paid while you entertain me for free...
Carry on.....
I don't need a "fan club" or sidekicks .....
Notice.... I'm getting paid while you entertain me for free...
Carry on.....
Posted by 3dimes2nickels1penny0sense
Hmmmmm.... interesting ......
Preying on a fish you think is "weak" .....smh
Caligula. You did come here asking for help ..... I think deezie helped .....
So ermmm..... keep it moving..... and take your sidekick with you....
Or you can address your issues with me and I will be glad to accommodate you....
Your choice.....
Online bullies make me laugh..... grow the fuck up ......no one is scared of you
But oh how I do like to entertain...... and the "old me" wants to come out and play so bad.....
Funny how people take "kindness " for weakness ......smh
the one thing i know about you is that your ass is in the air, so where does this come from..."address your issues with me?" read the OP you dickless bastard and post YOUR opinion on the OP or save me some time from writing the post in which i take your balls.
the problem with some pisces is not recognizing that their version of kindness is indeed weakness. a bitch is a bitch, all day, everyday.
just because YOU think you're a better person for having given without return doesn't mean that the other person is worse off for having taken what has been given and leaving you in the gutter as a result.
Posted by 3dimes2nickels1penny0sense
I'm getting paid while you entertain me for free...
are you a "PC Tech" too? if so, i'll save the dollar i plan to give to the guy at the red light tomorrow for you. i am a compassionate conservative after all.
Posted by 3dimes2nickels1penny0sense
kindness " for weakness
typical phrase and the only person who has ever turned it on its head was a virgo...the opposite of pisces as you know.
"don't mistake my kindness for BLINDNESS" my Virgo friend has often said and therein lies the irony...the opposite. Pisces, i FEEL you. the Virgo, i SEE you. Pisces delves into your emotion. Virgo delves into your thought.
set your piddly feelings aside. read words on a screen. answer the fucking question.
the end.
Ladies.... imma be completely honest for a moment.
Me being a heterosexual male around all the women on this site..... how can I put this.....
I feel like a "kid in a candy store".....lol
As for scorched. Don't make me bring you back to the "home team".... trust me, if you let me
I can make you never wanna "be" another female again....please believe me....
Caligula. I like your style ..... plus I have a thing for Virgals....
But I mean.... you can be brutal sometimes ..... you know how "sensitive " we Pisces can be....
LOL ....
Me being a heterosexual male around all the women on this site..... how can I put this.....
I feel like a "kid in a candy store".....lol
As for scorched. Don't make me bring you back to the "home team".... trust me, if you let me
I can make you never wanna "be" another female again....please believe me....
Caligula. I like your style ..... plus I have a thing for Virgals....
But I mean.... you can be brutal sometimes ..... you know how "sensitive " we Pisces can be....
LOL ....
Caligula ....you just need some good d# $ % and you'll be a new person. Real talk. I know you feel me..
Make love not war....
I prefer to be a "beast" in the sheets anyway ......
Yes 8ball was a little over the top but that's how she is..... and you in "our house"....
This ain't the Virgo board....so tone it down a notch ....
Make love not war....
I prefer to be a "beast" in the sheets anyway ......
Yes 8ball was a little over the top but that's how she is..... and you in "our house"....
This ain't the Virgo board....so tone it down a notch ....
Posted by 3588PISCES
Oh & I hit the ignore button on her, cause it makes me sick just to see her avatar and what she says.
GREAT!
you're a passive WEAK ASS BITCH so PLEASE hit the block on MY thread. lol...you hit the block on MY thread—?
wtf? really? i mean really?
you stupid fucking shit. you want to dominate MY thread by ignoring ME? that's your weakness. you can't confront directly and you can't do so because your vagina is in your mouth. here's a thought; do us both a favor and suck my dick!
pisces isn't the owner of self-sacrifice. believe it or not, there are those who do it more logically and efficiently and with better results. you could learn from your opposite and until you do, go fuck yourself!
back to the OP...
Posted by 3dimes2nickels1penny0sense
Caligula ....you just need some good d# $ % and you'll be a new person. Real talk. I know you feel me..
Make love not war....
I prefer to be a "beast" in the sheets anyway ......
Yes 8ball was a little over the top but that's how she is..... and you in "our house"....
This ain't the Virgo board....so tone it down a notch ....
you psychotic fuck! what the hell are you talkin about? in "our house"...lol...crazy bastard. go strangle a cat as that's the closest you'll get to pussy.
Lol, this actually was a good topic before derailment ......
@Caligula. I'm not a PC Tech. I'm a pipe layer....... lucky for you. I occasionally make house
calls but .....ermmmm.... that money you was talking..... how can I say this.....
Me no speak "broke". No comprende. As much shyt as you talk Caligula, I know u got some
paper ...... LOL. Since you a dxp member, you get 15% off.
Why "strangle" a cat when u can "beat it up ".....smh
Give that Virgo intellect a rest....Geesh .... relax.... one word for you...
PASSION . You need some in your life. Seriously. Lucky for you, we Pisces have passion
in abundance. 🙂
@Caligula. I'm not a PC Tech. I'm a pipe layer....... lucky for you. I occasionally make house
calls but .....ermmmm.... that money you was talking..... how can I say this.....
Me no speak "broke". No comprende. As much shyt as you talk Caligula, I know u got some
paper ...... LOL. Since you a dxp member, you get 15% off.
Why "strangle" a cat when u can "beat it up ".....smh
Give that Virgo intellect a rest....Geesh .... relax.... one word for you...
PASSION . You need some in your life. Seriously. Lucky for you, we Pisces have passion
in abundance. 🙂
Posted by squarethecircle
I will speak only for myself and not the collective.
I have a hard time asking for help. I will exhaust all avenues before it is absolutely clear that I can't do it by myself. I think it is because of an ego and lack of ego.
This is what has played in my head over the years...
Ego-I can handle it. I am capable. I am intelligent. I am weak if I don't handle this. I can not be weak. I don't have that luxury.
Lack of Ego- I don't want to bother people with my stupid issues. My problems are not as bad as others. They deserve the help more than me.
On receiving help...
I resent it but treasure it. Goes back to ego and lack of one. I am very grateful that someone can recognize my need for help and take action. So so so grateful. it actually makes me feel loved. and makes me love them more. But it makes me feel vulnerable and weak. In the past, I did expect my guy/friend/family to just "know". I think it is because I "just know" and act on their behalf. Slowly but surely, I have realized that's not fair to expect that of people. I need to communicate. I am allowed to be "weak" and I need people. I am aware that I do have passive aggressive tendencies and I am trying to work on being more upfront. I think it will always be a battle though.
^that's actually quite interesting...thanks!
*goes off to ponder*
Tubby ..... because the Fish doesn't have to actually do it in the physical realm to have accomplished it. I know that sounds way out there in la-la-land, but, it is what it is.
Once he told her about her dream job that is available and she should go get it ..... she did go get it, in her dreams and that's good enough for the Fish.
It's hard to explain and it would be even harder for a Bull to get, maybe impossible for you to ... but, the greatest life experiences to a Fish is all in their heads, in their envisioning living through the event. And we are perfectly satisfied with living like this.
Even now as she works her dream job (as you called it) that he went and got for her .... isn't her dream job really. Actually her dream job is in her head, and always has been. If anything, this new job she has will discourage her because there's no way it could own up to what she saw in her mind.
And, no, I don't ask for help .. because I never need help, except for my husband to lift a heavy box, or reach in a high cabinet.
This lady didn't need help. The man assumed she needed because he didn't see her act. But, he assumed wrong. The lady could be digging ditches or washing dishes ... and would still be experiencing living her dream and be quite content.
Once he told her about her dream job that is available and she should go get it ..... she did go get it, in her dreams and that's good enough for the Fish.
It's hard to explain and it would be even harder for a Bull to get, maybe impossible for you to ... but, the greatest life experiences to a Fish is all in their heads, in their envisioning living through the event. And we are perfectly satisfied with living like this.
Even now as she works her dream job (as you called it) that he went and got for her .... isn't her dream job really. Actually her dream job is in her head, and always has been. If anything, this new job she has will discourage her because there's no way it could own up to what she saw in her mind.
And, no, I don't ask for help .. because I never need help, except for my husband to lift a heavy box, or reach in a high cabinet.
This lady didn't need help. The man assumed she needed because he didn't see her act. But, he assumed wrong. The lady could be digging ditches or washing dishes ... and would still be experiencing living her dream and be quite content.
Another thing to keep in mind .... the Fish is so self-contained that it knows what its needs are. If/when another person attempts to assist/help without being asked, the Fish usually resents and balks at it, even if the other person is valid in believing the help was necessary.
because nobody else is me, you can assume I need help, it may look like I need it ... but, you don't know what I need ... only I know what I need.
and we take that ^^^^^^^^^ kind of mindset
There's no black and white .. you (meaning people) see one or the other, while the Fish is swirling around in all the gray, appearing as though it can't make out with clarity where to go, or how to go .... but, even still, you aren't me, so it's not your place to decide it, even if I haven't yet.
If another person acts on our behalf, we feel violated .. even if you believe it was for our benefit.
because nobody else is me, you can assume I need help, it may look like I need it ... but, you don't know what I need ... only I know what I need.
and we take that ^^^^^^^^^ kind of mindset
There's no black and white .. you (meaning people) see one or the other, while the Fish is swirling around in all the gray, appearing as though it can't make out with clarity where to go, or how to go .... but, even still, you aren't me, so it's not your place to decide it, even if I haven't yet.
If another person acts on our behalf, we feel violated .. even if you believe it was for our benefit.
Posted by 3588PISCES
Omg, I read Caligulas psts and I feel sorry for all the Virgos. Usually they are very polite and dont act the way this MONSTER is acting. Those words you just said to me are horrible and any man or woman would feel like throwing up in your face.
bad words anyone can say them but all that low talk is frikkken sick. YOU ARE NO SMART VIRGO. YOU ARE A SICK IN THE HEAD person and I really feel sorry for you.
I never use private parts as insults that is very low and sickenning. Uh ummmm Im more happy being a pisces if that is how VIRGOS Communicate. what a sick person you are. GUACALA!!!!!!!! I really want to throw up after reading all your nasty disgusting words.
You are an embarrassment to our kind .. shut up.
The Fish take the high road, that is our dignity .. we don't stoop to their level.
so shut the fuck up .. and walk away with dignity, instead of responding
so shut the fuck up .. and walk away with dignity, instead of responding
i can see that^
overall, i think it depends on the permanence of the action. in the example given, submitting a resume doesn't guarantee a job, so given that the action didn't result in finality, the violation is apparent, but the impact is minimal.
i also can see how pisces inaction could be a choice and that it may not be their inability to decide between choices which causes pause, but rather not liking any of the choices and not being willing to choose the lesser of two evils.
"I never need help"...this is disingenuous or semantics. you may not WANT it, but all of us NEED it at one point or another. i know that you feel right in this stance and that's exactly what i was getting at with regard to pisces and the difficulty a partner has in determining how/when/where to render assistance.
having a partner implies a desire to not go at it alone, so regardless of want/need, what's the point of having someone in your corner if you never want/need them to have your back? why is pisces willing to be a crutch, but unwilling to ask for a shoulder to lean on?
pisces is the old man of the zodiac and in a way, i can picture an old man trying to make his way up several flights of stairs and in the process of doing so, snapping at those who try to lend a hand. sure, he can do it. it may take the better part of an hour and he might break a hip or be laid up in bed for the next week, but he is capable of doing it all alone. thing is, what if the building is aflame and there are other people trying to make their way out and miserly old man is blocking the way? should the others push the old man aside and step over his soon to be corpse simply because he was too stubborn/prideful/stupid/self-reliant to ask for help? no. guaranteed though, once the old man is carried out of the burning building, the person lending the assistance will be met with a thank you or then again, maybe they'll get a rap on the head by the old man's cane...he could have done it himself after all 😛
overall, i think it depends on the permanence of the action. in the example given, submitting a resume doesn't guarantee a job, so given that the action didn't result in finality, the violation is apparent, but the impact is minimal.
i also can see how pisces inaction could be a choice and that it may not be their inability to decide between choices which causes pause, but rather not liking any of the choices and not being willing to choose the lesser of two evils.
"I never need help"...this is disingenuous or semantics. you may not WANT it, but all of us NEED it at one point or another. i know that you feel right in this stance and that's exactly what i was getting at with regard to pisces and the difficulty a partner has in determining how/when/where to render assistance.
having a partner implies a desire to not go at it alone, so regardless of want/need, what's the point of having someone in your corner if you never want/need them to have your back? why is pisces willing to be a crutch, but unwilling to ask for a shoulder to lean on?
pisces is the old man of the zodiac and in a way, i can picture an old man trying to make his way up several flights of stairs and in the process of doing so, snapping at those who try to lend a hand. sure, he can do it. it may take the better part of an hour and he might break a hip or be laid up in bed for the next week, but he is capable of doing it all alone. thing is, what if the building is aflame and there are other people trying to make their way out and miserly old man is blocking the way? should the others push the old man aside and step over his soon to be corpse simply because he was too stubborn/prideful/stupid/self-reliant to ask for help? no. guaranteed though, once the old man is carried out of the burning building, the person lending the assistance will be met with a thank you or then again, maybe they'll get a rap on the head by the old man's cane...he could have done it himself after all 😛
Tubby, just ignore her ... she's obviously a guppy and therefore quite subjective.
Once she grows her fins, she'll know her place.
::: crosses fingers :::
Once she grows her fins, she'll know her place.
::: crosses fingers :::
Posted by caligula
"I never need help"...this is disingenuous or semantics. you may not WANT it, but all of us NEED it at one point or another. i know that you feel right in this stance and that's exactly what i was getting at with regard to pisces and the difficulty a partner has in determining how/when/where to render assistance.
having a partner implies a desire to not go at it alone, so regardless of want/need, what's the point of having someone in your corner if you never want/need them to have your back? why is pisces willing to be a crutch, but unwilling to ask for a shoulder to lean on?
Try being the person living it !!!!!!
I know, it sucks. Most Fish cannot see what you are saying, that is why you might meet resistance. We are literally two Fish swimming in opposite directions in nearly aspect of life. We truly believe we don't need help, yet, that in itself is a tremendous weakness because it makes us ignore the very need of needing help, rather than addressing that we might be vulnerable.
I truly understand why people have a hard time dealing with Pisces ... we are walking contridictions.
This is one of the many reasons why I believe Virgos are our best partners ... they await to be of service to their partner, and what they awaiting is direction to act upon. They will sit in inertia for eternity, if the partner is at a standstill .. which is the case for Pisces the majority of the time.
The other side is that Virgo is very cantankerous when not getting their way (eventhough this way is never verbalized, and only comes out in critiques) .... and this sends the message to the Fish to rescue; something is amiss and the Fish goes into saviour mode, which will then change its color to mend the mood of the Virgin.
A very working relationship that targets each of their core fundamental needs.
The other side is that Virgo is very cantankerous when not getting their way (eventhough this way is never verbalized, and only comes out in critiques) .... and this sends the message to the Fish to rescue; something is amiss and the Fish goes into saviour mode, which will then change its color to mend the mood of the Virgin.
A very working relationship that targets each of their core fundamental needs.
Posted by 3588PISCES
P-Angel you gottal take a look at yourself as well. You actually say the nastiest words to other people so I would take the advice you just gave me.
I don't do what you just did, so there's no advice of my own to take.
I look at myself with more clarity than you even know exists.
I speak in offense, not defense .. know the difference, or be a fool, your choice.
Perhaps, I should explain, due to the liklihood of you not getting it.
I wasn't referencing your choice of words. Whether you use nasty words, clever words, condenscending words or annoying words wasn't what I was addressing.
You obviously didn't get that since you responded in referencing words I use with people, in saying "nasty".
I was talking about defending yourself to an offense, the stooping to the very low level in which offended you ... it is unPisces-like and if you care to look around you, the only Fish you'll ever see do that are the guppies.
the grown-ass Fish who have their Fins ... swish away, realizing that they don't own the claims made, and if they defend what was said, then that means it gives the words merit, validation in that they were worth addressing.
Get it now?
I wasn't referencing your choice of words. Whether you use nasty words, clever words, condenscending words or annoying words wasn't what I was addressing.
You obviously didn't get that since you responded in referencing words I use with people, in saying "nasty".
I was talking about defending yourself to an offense, the stooping to the very low level in which offended you ... it is unPisces-like and if you care to look around you, the only Fish you'll ever see do that are the guppies.
the grown-ass Fish who have their Fins ... swish away, realizing that they don't own the claims made, and if they defend what was said, then that means it gives the words merit, validation in that they were worth addressing.
Get it now?
Posted by 3588PISCES
P-Angel, I have NO respect for you and whatever you say means nothing to me.
I only take advice from smart people I respect. You are just another person typing away stuff you read online and think you are smart. please get off of you cloud and stop the un-real bs you always type about pisces people.
I am done with this, Im not sure how old you are but seems like I have more chances correcting myself when I get your age. you being your 53 years of age and acting the way you do on here only makes me feel sorry for you. time is passing by and you still are in the dumps. Fix yourself P-Angel before giving any advice to others.
That is all I can say to you.
lol .. well, that answers the question .. you dont' get it.
Because you just subjected it to yourself offensively, instead of stepping up on a higher road and looking at it objectively.
Don't worry, before you die, you'll grow your Fins !!
:::: crosses fingers ::::
Posted by P-Angel
we are walking contridictions.
it's what makes the sign cool and uber maddening.
i notice it most when attempting to reason/agree upon something with a sun conjunct mercury. with this person, i've learned that i can never trust my ears. sure, i heard what i heard yesterday and although i may hear something that is completely opposite today, the pisces with this type of placement may not see the contradiction.
in the past, the fixed-fire in me would spin into a rage because i felt as if i was being played a fool...i heard what i heard and now i can't believe that i'm hearing what i'm hearing. i thought the matter was settled and to have someone casually turn my fixed world on its head is tough to take. their apparent lack of conviction, their wishy washy stance threatens my taurean security and made it difficult for me feel as if the ground beneath me was solid.
recently i had a wake-up call though in regard to this. i think i posted about it but whatev. it dawned on me...THERE ARE TWO FISHIES!!!
i never really connected it, the duality. i got it conceptually, but what if it's deeper than that? what if the person who said what i heard, is not the person who is saying what i'm hearing? and therin lies the problem...how can you help someone who is confusing the hell out of you?
as a taurus, i can support whatever decision you make, but the logical part of me is unable to support two contradicting decisions simultaneously. i'm not flexible like that...nor do i want to be.
i've also found that if i invest too much in supporting what i heard, i may not be able to recognize that what the pisces truly wants is not what i heard, it's what i'm currently hearing. or maybe that want to do what i heard and what i'm hearing is just their inner fantasies leaking out. in other words, they've shared their dream and in the past, i'd pulverize that fantasy by being dismissive, sardonic, angry and calling them/it foolish.
my point is, the two make it difficult for a partner to know what to do and at the end of the day, there's a damned feeling that can take over. for action oriented/more logical signs, i think it's the feeling that they'll never progress as a couple. great Pisces, you helped me accomplish my dream, but what about you? you are where you were and you keep changing where you wish to be.
cont...
with respect to my bff example and your stating that she would be equally happy with her dream job as she would be washing dishes, well that's fine and dandy if she were alone. it's not in a partnership.
relationships are contracts and how can you sign or enter into a contract with someone who keeps changing terms unilaterally? if she said she wants a particular job, he agrees that it'd be a good idea to find said job, but then she goes off and starts mopping floors...wtf?
yes, being in a partnership does not mean one is beholden to the partner, but it does require working together and that's difficult with pisces. if they're helping you work on something important to you, shit gets done and you will never have a more supportive partner. if you're ready to help them with shit that's supposedly important to them, wait, it's not important anymore, this is important, no that is, or what about that, and then again, wait, what? why is this even a discussion? they never wanted to do any of those things. it's YOU who wanted it, not them. they're happy just where they are...until they're not and the cycle starts all over again 😛
with respect to my bff example and your stating that she would be equally happy with her dream job as she would be washing dishes, well that's fine and dandy if she were alone. it's not in a partnership.
relationships are contracts and how can you sign or enter into a contract with someone who keeps changing terms unilaterally? if she said she wants a particular job, he agrees that it'd be a good idea to find said job, but then she goes off and starts mopping floors...wtf?
yes, being in a partnership does not mean one is beholden to the partner, but it does require working together and that's difficult with pisces. if they're helping you work on something important to you, shit gets done and you will never have a more supportive partner. if you're ready to help them with shit that's supposedly important to them, wait, it's not important anymore, this is important, no that is, or what about that, and then again, wait, what? why is this even a discussion? they never wanted to do any of those things. it's YOU who wanted it, not them. they're happy just where they are...until they're not and the cycle starts all over again 😛
Without doubt, Tubby .... I know it's maddening, but, it's the nature of the beast ... what can we do except live it?
This is where Capricorns come into play, and every Fish must have one. Cappy's, just like their earth siblings, are prone to stand aghast when trying to understand what the Pisces preference is on a certain topic, if a preference even exists ... however, they have a specific gift which I believe is in place just for us Fishies.
Instead standing there scratching their heads, they forumlate (in their incredible creative minds) their idea of what they believe the Pisces just said/meant ... and act upon it with passion, enlisting the Fish to join in the creation, which leaves the Piscean awed in that, perhaps the Goat didn't quite grasp what we wanted (which how could they, considering we weren't certain ourselves), but, instead of scolding us, critiquing us, controlling us, or ignoring us .... they had a vision on account of us.
Pisces struggle every day of their lives to find a way to verbalize what they mean, and 99% of the time fall so far short of conveying their intentions, that people wonder if we aren't autistic. We could speak a million words, and they may never come close to what we feel.
The artist is born ... through visualization, or through poetic prose, or through music, etc .... we can express exactly what we want you to know.
With Cappy's pulling us into molding their conceptual framework, we come alive ... because at that point we realize that the Capricorn got us. Got us meaning ... they realized, and acted upon = it has to be drawn out because its stuck inside and we can't find a path out.
Love me some Cappy's .... without them, there's no point in life.
This is where Capricorns come into play, and every Fish must have one. Cappy's, just like their earth siblings, are prone to stand aghast when trying to understand what the Pisces preference is on a certain topic, if a preference even exists ... however, they have a specific gift which I believe is in place just for us Fishies.
Instead standing there scratching their heads, they forumlate (in their incredible creative minds) their idea of what they believe the Pisces just said/meant ... and act upon it with passion, enlisting the Fish to join in the creation, which leaves the Piscean awed in that, perhaps the Goat didn't quite grasp what we wanted (which how could they, considering we weren't certain ourselves), but, instead of scolding us, critiquing us, controlling us, or ignoring us .... they had a vision on account of us.
Pisces struggle every day of their lives to find a way to verbalize what they mean, and 99% of the time fall so far short of conveying their intentions, that people wonder if we aren't autistic. We could speak a million words, and they may never come close to what we feel.
The artist is born ... through visualization, or through poetic prose, or through music, etc .... we can express exactly what we want you to know.
With Cappy's pulling us into molding their conceptual framework, we come alive ... because at that point we realize that the Capricorn got us. Got us meaning ... they realized, and acted upon = it has to be drawn out because its stuck inside and we can't find a path out.
Love me some Cappy's .... without them, there's no point in life.
i think Capricorns are a fallacy. of all that i know, they ain't never built shit.
i do have a cappy friend who is with a pisces and he's pretty much a deadbeat. they're happy, but they're both pretty simple people. capi's are generally "simple" to me. not quite stupid...just simple minds. even the academically wise ones leave me wondering if there's a chirping sound in their heads.
but i'm getting off topic...
i do have a cappy friend who is with a pisces and he's pretty much a deadbeat. they're happy, but they're both pretty simple people. capi's are generally "simple" to me. not quite stupid...just simple minds. even the academically wise ones leave me wondering if there's a chirping sound in their heads.
but i'm getting off topic...
I hate asking for help.
Some of it is because I dislike bothering other people with my shit. I mean we all have our own crap to deal with right?
I also do not like feeling indebted in any way to anyone. It's the same with borrowing money from friends it just makes shit weird. I do not want to feel like I "owe" you anything.
For me personally though the main reason is this. Having people "help" me means them getting involved in my shit. My personal, private shit. I don't always want to explain to someone, whether it's a friend or family, why I need their help. They'll only get MORE involved and that one little thing I asked for help with becomes TEN other things they THINK I need help with, whether I want it or not. And I hate that.
So fuck it. I'll just work it out myself.
Some of it is because I dislike bothering other people with my shit. I mean we all have our own crap to deal with right?
I also do not like feeling indebted in any way to anyone. It's the same with borrowing money from friends it just makes shit weird. I do not want to feel like I "owe" you anything.
For me personally though the main reason is this. Having people "help" me means them getting involved in my shit. My personal, private shit. I don't always want to explain to someone, whether it's a friend or family, why I need their help. They'll only get MORE involved and that one little thing I asked for help with becomes TEN other things they THINK I need help with, whether I want it or not. And I hate that.
So fuck it. I'll just work it out myself.
I'm a weird fish though so yeah. 😛
Posted by MissPirate
I hate asking for help.
Some of it is because I dislike bothering other people with my shit. I mean we all have our own crap to deal with right?
I also do not like feeling indebted in any way to anyone. It's the same with borrowing money from friends it just makes shit weird. I do not want to feel like I "owe" you anything.
For me personally though the main reason is this. Having people "help" me means them getting involved in my shit. My personal, private shit. I don't always want to explain to someone, whether it's a friend or family, why I need their help. They'll only get MORE involved and that one little thing I asked for help with becomes TEN other things they THINK I need help with, whether I want it or not. And I hate that.
So fuck it. I'll just work it out myself.
i can respect your stance and that makes perfect sense when it comes to friends and extended family. but what about your partner in life when/if you have/had one? how thick is your veil of secrecy when it comes to your "other half?"
Posted by caligulaPosted by MissPirate
I hate asking for help.
Some of it is because I dislike bothering other people with my shit. I mean we all have our own crap to deal with right?
I also do not like feeling indebted in any way to anyone. It's the same with borrowing money from friends it just makes shit weird. I do not want to feel like I "owe" you anything.
For me personally though the main reason is this. Having people "help" me means them getting involved in my shit. My personal, private shit. I don't always want to explain to someone, whether it's a friend or family, why I need their help. They'll only get MORE involved and that one little thing I asked for help with becomes TEN other things they THINK I need help with, whether I want it or not. And I hate that.
So fuck it. I'll just work it out myself.
i can respect your stance and that makes perfect sense when it comes to friends and extended family. but what about your partner in life when/if you have/had one? how thick is your veil of secrecy when it comes to your "other half?"click to expand
It's not about keeping secrets it's about NOT having people interfere, which I've found people often seem to want to do. Family, friends and partners all. I'm talking about the big stuff here btw I have no problem with asking for help with things like building some furniture for me; I'll happily phone my Taurus stepdad and he'll happily oblige.
If it's something major though I'd rather get it sorted myself so as to avoid interference and/or accompanying lecture if it's something I've screwed up.
Very interesting thread, gave me much to ponder.
I was widowed some years ago, and as such, I did not NEED to work, as long as I lived simply. I felt my young children needed me more at home, and it was a blessing I always counted to be able to do that. But years pass, kids get older and need Mom less.. eventually, I was just swimming around in my little fishbowl.. content with the way things were, with the way things had been for years (soothing the hell out of my Fixed Taurus placements haha).. then here's Libra standing there. P-Angel said a Pisces needs a Virgo, and also needs a Cappy.. I can see that, it makes sense to me (and my Tau bits!).. and maybe it was Libra's Virgo Moon and Cap Rising.. he began mentioning me going back to work. I was typical Fish.. but why? It wasn't needed, and my bills are paid.. I am not dipping into YOUR money, what's your beef? He told me I'd like having a job again, getting out of the house more, interacting with adults, etc. He said he knew someone, could get me a job in the field I was in before, I declined. (I got this. I can do this. Myself, tyvm.) I guess his placements were anticipating my needs and wants, and offering a solution to a problem I did not see as a problem. I balked. I dug my heels in. And I was a little pissy, I admit. Discussion tabled. Very good.
Then, during these times of huge restructuring and economical crisis, markets/investments crashing, IRAs bleeding out.. the end result was me losing nearly half of my income. BOOM. Now it's a problem that is visible to me, and a good reason to panic. But I had circled my fishbowl so many times, for so many years.. omg I was practically immobile! What's Libra do? He walks in one night and says, "You have an interview with Mr. Friend tomorrow. The job's basically yours." I FELT the world stop spinning for a second.. WHAT the FUCK?!.. OMG, did you just.. SERIOUSLY.. did you just ARRANGE things for me.. like a CHILD?! I was FURIOUS. Oh, we had it out, in our typical fashion. No yelling or name-calling.. but he caught hell for it, and defended his actions cuz they were out of love, and they were needed cuz I never even looked into that job, and it's PERFECT.. my field, very close by, I'd LIKE his friend as a boss... Yeah, stalemate. Cuz I'm a stubborn bitch who had a serious problem asking for help.
I was widowed some years ago, and as such, I did not NEED to work, as long as I lived simply. I felt my young children needed me more at home, and it was a blessing I always counted to be able to do that. But years pass, kids get older and need Mom less.. eventually, I was just swimming around in my little fishbowl.. content with the way things were, with the way things had been for years (soothing the hell out of my Fixed Taurus placements haha).. then here's Libra standing there. P-Angel said a Pisces needs a Virgo, and also needs a Cappy.. I can see that, it makes sense to me (and my Tau bits!).. and maybe it was Libra's Virgo Moon and Cap Rising.. he began mentioning me going back to work. I was typical Fish.. but why? It wasn't needed, and my bills are paid.. I am not dipping into YOUR money, what's your beef? He told me I'd like having a job again, getting out of the house more, interacting with adults, etc. He said he knew someone, could get me a job in the field I was in before, I declined. (I got this. I can do this. Myself, tyvm.) I guess his placements were anticipating my needs and wants, and offering a solution to a problem I did not see as a problem. I balked. I dug my heels in. And I was a little pissy, I admit. Discussion tabled. Very good.
Then, during these times of huge restructuring and economical crisis, markets/investments crashing, IRAs bleeding out.. the end result was me losing nearly half of my income. BOOM. Now it's a problem that is visible to me, and a good reason to panic. But I had circled my fishbowl so many times, for so many years.. omg I was practically immobile! What's Libra do? He walks in one night and says, "You have an interview with Mr. Friend tomorrow. The job's basically yours." I FELT the world stop spinning for a second.. WHAT the FUCK?!.. OMG, did you just.. SERIOUSLY.. did you just ARRANGE things for me.. like a CHILD?! I was FURIOUS. Oh, we had it out, in our typical fashion. No yelling or name-calling.. but he caught hell for it, and defended his actions cuz they were out of love, and they were needed cuz I never even looked into that job, and it's PERFECT.. my field, very close by, I'd LIKE his friend as a boss... Yeah, stalemate. Cuz I'm a stubborn bitch who had a serious problem asking for help.
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For months, my bff flirted with the idea of applying and instead applied to other companies, sporadically. Although she was making an effort to find a new job, her daily misery prompted the Libra to take matters into his own hands. He got hold of her resume and submitted it to his company. What's funny is, although the Pisces agreed that she really wanted to work for the company, she felt a bit violated and angry with him for having not discussed it with her beforehand. These feelings of course dissipated when she got the job offer. She is now working in her dream job.
I wrote all this to say, is it difficult for Pisces to ASK for help? Far too often my Pisces bff has said that even though she has difficulty communicating it at times, her Lib "should just know" what she needs. Personally, I'm finding that Pisces are able to receive/accept unsolicited assistance positively, but as with my bff, there are times when a helping hand is resented in some way. As I said, she knew that he submitted her resume to help her and to end her daily frustrations with her previous job, but the notion that he did it without communicating this to her was upsetting.
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