broke up w/ leo sun/libra moon man

i am a fish with a cancer moon and at first was crazy for this lion, he was sweet, attentive, charming.. and then as time went by i started seeing how in his mind some people are better than others.. and to me we are all the same (in one way or another messed up, messing up, recovering mess ups) at first he would get mad when he would talk badly about someone and i would say something like "maybe they just can't communicate", "maybe" this or that i guess in defense of the other person, this would bother the lion and he would say .. "why cant you just take my side sometimes?" I dont know about anyone else here but I don't like to say i'm going to change something... i dont want that pressure, i want to do things because i feel like doing them not because it's being asked of me. sometimes he would act like he was better than people other times he would just go on these long rants complaining about things and i just couldnt take it , i've been divorced and thinking of living with someone that i couldn't take his side or listening to rants is exhausting. it's exhausting just writing this. yesterday he called and said i was the one he wanted to marry etc etc and i felt so hurt for him he never beat me he wasnt mean but to me the fact that i cant see eye to eye on things that aren't tangible like that was a deal breaker . is it a fish thing? a divorce thing? anyone been there?

I'm not getting why you can't just be quiet once in a while and let him have his viewpoint ?


I understand the desire for wanting to look at different angles of a situation, and I understand not wanting to change how I feel about something .... but, I also get that the other person wants his feelings to be validated also.

And I think you are missing that point he's trying to make. He feels like you won't compromise.


Quote: "why cant you just take my side sometimes?" I dont know about anyone else here but I don't like to say i'm going to change something... i dont want that pressure, i want to do things because i feel like doing them not because it's being asked of me."


It appears to me that you want your feelings validated, while not being accommodating enough to do in return what you preach = you won't validate his either.


divorce is probably the solution, since you don't want to make his opinion to be valuable, nor does he want yours to be .... but, I would suggest that you check that about yourself before you engage in another relationship.

If you have no desire to allow the other person's feelings about their viewpoints to matter for the sake of making them feel important (considering a partner is suppose to be their confidant) ... then you aren't ready for a relationship until you mature a little bit.

And some people are better than others.


Some people are really great .. some people are really pathetic ... some people are diabolical .... some people are peacekeepers .... some people have bad breath ... some people have gorgeous eyes .... some people are generous .... some people are stingy ... etc



And all of those ^^^ to include a bazillion other traits .... are used for measurement as to what level they are regarded on by the observers (everybody else) to make a dicision on where on their individual scales, the person they are judging measures.

that's what every person does. every person in this world judges other people, according to the above, before making their decisions on where/how the other person fits in their life, if at all.

If people don't realize that ^^^^ then their living in a bubble

well p- angel --- ouch!!!! lol I've read your responses on a few other posts and I think you are extremely wise. I also know that as much as I can help other people I can't be objective when I'm in the middle. Totally get your point, you are right I wasn't validating his feelings by letting him vent, and that's what I would want done in return. I guess I'm gonna have to add that to my growing list of work ons. Thank you for the light.

Posted by josietweettweet

.. I can't be objective when I'm in the middle.

I know ... nobody can. But, if it comes to our attention, we at least have it there to hash over with ourselves at a time when we aren't so vulnerable to our own feelings betraying us.

I'm glad you realize that he needed to be heard, as we all need to be heard.

Unfortunately, a Leo is very needy when it comes to getting attention ... so, it's likely that if you gave him an inch, we would pounce and make you listen insufferably.