Is oral sex considered cheating?

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cancerlady
@cancerlady
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Hey there...Cancerlady again with another sex related subject.

Recently I was pissed at my current bf (Pisces male) not to mention horny! and I ended up letting some other guy give me oral sex.

I wanted to know is that considered cheating? Personally if my man told me he had gotten some head and only that...I might be a bit upset, but not too much.

And if so...Would I be better off telling this Pisces man, or should I keep it to myself? He asked me to tell him the truth, but I don't think he really wants to know. Fill me in on your opinion...
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seizeTheDay
@seizeTheDay
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Well, it doesn't matter if I or anyone else here think it's cheating, it matters if you think it's cheating-- or HE thinks it's cheating... if the two of you are fine with it, then who cares what we think.

(ahem, but yah, I think it's cheating)

I personally can't keep secrets, however- somethings are better left unsaid.

At any rate, if you decide to tell him... before telling him- and getting caught up in the drama, you should have a clear reason as to why you did it. Did you do it to hurt him? .. or was it for self-affirmation?

Either way, you have to be prepared for his response even if it means the end of the relationship.

😢
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cancerlady
@cancerlady
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SeizetheDay

I let him do it because he wasn't ever aound and I was very horny. SERIOUSLY for no other reason...it had been like a month! Pure release b/c I am no good at that whole masturbation thing.

Honestly if he broke it off with me because of that...I would be kinda hurt but I would get over it. I am not the "lonely" type and am really cynical about the whole monogamy thing. I've been cheated on and every other girl I know has been cheated on, so I guess I don't think it is possible for a man to be COMPLETELY faithful. I didn't cheat on either of my other 2 b/f but they cheated on me...Not to mention the many times so called friends have stabbed me in the back. Now it's my trust is behind a brick wall mortared and entombed deep within me, never to return.

Sweet-P
Are you SERIOUS you would dump your man if he kissed another girl? I mean under any and all circumstances? I can understand more if you are married, because you made that commitment but dating? That seems a bit extreme. I'm not knocking you for it, I guess I just give my men a little more lee-way than that.

Thanks for your opinions!
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Tiamat
@Tiamat
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I think it depends on the person your involved with if they consider it cheating.And yeah I have noticed the it's okay for some men but if thier woman so much as talks to someone in a flirty way the girl is cheating on them.But those people are very untrusting anyways for good reason but thats due to thier own messing around.I wouldn't stay with someone that did it but other people might.
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cancerlady
@cancerlady
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Looneybird

Really I asked this question of everyone but especially on this thread in order to find out other Pisces men's opinion to get a consensus on their opinions to see if I could get an idea of what his reaction might be.

I am not really basing whether or not I am going to tell him on your opinions...I just like knowing what other people's ideas on the subject are. I very well could have said only the question, but I like giving a background on WHY I asked the question.

If you have noticed...I do that alot because I just like knowing what makes other people tick. I should have worded it like...What would you do if presented with this situation. Basically I like relating my life to other peoples experience and compare the two.

It seems like the consensus is that it is cheating! DARN! I'm a bad, bad girl!

CancerLady
For the record...Bill Clinton is my hero, YEAH!
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cancerlady
@cancerlady
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TaurusGoddess

That's funny that you said that b/c EVERY taurus girl I know has cheated on their man whether they were tired of them or not (lol) I mean EVERY SINGLE ONE! (LMAO)

For me though, I cheated b/c I was SUPER HORNY and still unsure as to whether I even claimed him as my boyfriend. It happened a few days after we had "the talk", he was saying all of this stuff, but I am not big on words. Actions are the thing and if your actions speak louder than your words...that's what I go by. He was still not around...once or twice I would see him back then.

BUT

I am not a cheater by nature because when I TOTALLY devote myself to someone, that's it! Well until they f-it up.

We have been doing good for the past couple of months but our recurring and only argument has been over the amount of time he spends with me. I am starting to understand him more, Pisces men are not easily understood but worth the effort. I also have realized I do messed up stuff to, when all this time I thought I was perfect!

I thought of my alleged infidelity b/c he asked me the other day if I was f-ing someone else, to which of course I answered no because TECHNICALLY it was in the past and I didn't actually screw him in the literal sense. I just tend to remind him alot that I don't HAVE to be alone and he takes it as me wanting to be with someone else.
That is my bad though because I shouldn't do things to make him feel bad when I am the insecure one.

Cancerlady
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looneybird
@looneybird
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Oh well that was typo..in my earleir post read nake as make.

cancerlady it is a good idea to learn from others experience. I myself do that.I am sorry if my earlier post came as a slight. Personally I think you need to sit down that BF of yours and make him aware that he aint paying enough attention to you. And will it be okay with him if you get outside support? ... yeah. A highly spirited , enegitic and young lady deserves more in life. The main problem here is not that you were naughty on the side..but why you were?

Personally even fliritng can drive me up the wall.

Take Care
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blueangel83
@blueangel83
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Oh wow Miss Cancer Lady!!! LOL! To me, any type of contact with the genitalia is cheating! and I agree with Sweet-P, if my guy merely kisses a girl, he is out the door!

If you tell your Pisces and he's ok with it, there is a big chance that he will cheat on you back. If you are feeling guilty enough and would just like to get it off your chest then I suggest you telling him. Depending on if he truly loves you, he might get over it in a few weeks or months but if you guys are just starting then I doubt that he will stay with you.
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BJ
@BJ
20 YearsPisces

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Mmm Cancerlady,

Damn Girl, that's cheating in anyones book. Baby you gotta find some other way to get rid of your sexual tensions. You can't go around sitting on other guys faces just because your "SUPER HORNY".

Surely you wouldn't really be cool if he decided to play tonsel hockey with some other women just because he felt like knocking one out.

I love you Cancerlady but you are one bad,bad girl
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OBPisces
@OBPisces
20 Years

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Hey Cancerlady

Girlfriend, looks like the verdict is in... GUILTY OF CHEATING IN THE SECOND DEGREE...

Personally, if I were you I would not tell him, but I would be sure not to let it happen again. If this happened when you two weren't officially boyfriend and girlfriend, then just count it as a mistake and the next time when a moment hits, take a cold shower (lol- like that ever works) and just wait on your Pisces man to adhere to your needs😉

I hope everything is still going well for you two🙂 Will be seeing my sweetie this weekend.

Much love,
OBPisces

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Alana
@Alana
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Oh Cancerlady, cancerlady - you've got everyone in here giggling.....perhaps the only one who isn't is Mrs. Clinton!!....but I guess she won't ever be a member of this duncan gang....or maybe she already is....Perhaps she's the famous MODERATOR!!!

But hey, if I were you I wouldn't give it a second thought.
Mr. Pisces hasn't been "coming" (excuse the pun!!) through for you in more ways than one of recent, has he??!!!
Flitting off here and there and not being there for you 100% when he says he will.
In my world, if you don't follow through, you reap the consequences.....but you needn't be told a "blow-by-blow"!!!:-) account of them!!!!if you get my drift.
I have cheated in the past and the reason I did it was because I was hurt - and I felt I was getting my own back by fcuking someone else - I know it sounds babyish and immoral but it always worked for me so I ain't gonna condemn anyone.
Every lady has her needs......now if you were engaged or married, then it would be a different ball-game technically.
As for telling Mr. Pisces......no way hozay, no way hozay, no way hozay - never admit, always deny, deny, deny.
Hope he had a long tongue.......:-)
But if you feel bad about it, just put it down to experience, avoid it in the future, move on and always keep that trap shut!!!!:-)

You rock kid!!

A x
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cancerlady
@cancerlady
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http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZSYYYYYYYYUS' target='_blank'>

OB Pisces- What say you the jury?

Sweet P- GUILTY, GUILTY, GUILTY!

SeizetheDay- GUILTY but I would forgive her if I were him & move on.

Sea Siren- GUILTY, she should be broken on the racks

Tiamat- GUILTY, no lethal injection is much more humane

OLD JAKE (I mean God)- Not Guilty by reason of being led morally astray by certain influential persons

LooneyBird- Not Guilty by reasonable doubt

Taurus Goddess- No Contest, she's guilty but deserves a light sentence because she was driven into the arms of another man

blueangel83- GUILTY, what is wrong with you people! That's disgusting!

BJ- GUILTY, but what's her phone number?

Alana- NOT GUILTY, GIRL POWER!!!!!


OB Pisces- So what should we do? We're missing two jurors...Where are they?
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P-Angel
@P-Angel
20 Years25,000+ PostsPisces

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CancerLady,

It seems as though you already knew the answer to the question before you asked it on the board. If you had no remorse, felt no guilt - then you wouldn't have asked.

I'll be nice and not crucify, like usual.

According to most men I know . . . eating is cheating if it's a guy doing it. Had another woman been diving . . .

So, maybe the solution is to tell him, just don't tell him who and merely insinuate that the eater was female - he'd probably have no problem with it. That's not really a lie, just a side step and let him make the assumptions.
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Tiamat
@Tiamat
20 Years1,000+ PostsScorpio

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Technically It sounds like he already suspects somethings happened,and no it doesn't sound like he'd be happy about it.If you chose to tell him be prepared for his leaving.My ex pisces got mad at me only one month into the relationship because my brother-n-law(a cheater)who's overly jealous of my sister attempted to twisted my own and the sisters visiting a guy friend(only a friend)into something it wasn't.
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cancerlady
@cancerlady
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Damn Brahn0913,

You seem to be taking this a bit too personally...Yes, I knew before I asked it was cheating and that is was wrong...I think I admitted that. I just wanted to hear other's opinions on the matter of oral sex being cheating. Believe it or not, some people don't think it is cheating. Take a chill pill and cool out dude before your head explodes! Geez!

"Any woman with a self esteem can keep a good man and stop him from cheating."

I am going to try to ignore the rest of your tirade, but I can't get past this statement b/c it is total BS! A man is going to cheat if he wants to regardless of how beautiful, perfect, or self-respecting his woman is. Besides I also know plenty of MEN who stay in destructive relationships too. You still seem to be infatuated with Ms. Pisces even though from what YOU have written she doesn't want you so don't try to knock anyone before you look at yourself. You make yourself look bitter.

Besides if you are going to lash out at people, get the words right before you start spewing your so called logic all over...I said and I quote...

"I've been cheated on and every other girl I know has been cheated on, so I guess I don't think it is possible for a man to be COMPLETELY faithful."

I never said that "No man can ever be loyal" those were your words so don't quote me as saying them. There are three parts to that statement which imply doubt and leave open space for exceptions that disprove the rule. I just have yet to meet those exceptions.


Cancerlady

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looneybird
@looneybird
21 Years1,000+ Posts

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Hey Guys!!!

First of Branh your take on why men cheat is way off. For two people to be loyal to each other..they have to be correctly matched & besides circumstances too play a great role.

Cancerlady here is just taking opinions and perhaps letting it out. We need to give her moral support and not crucify her. It is obvious that her relationship is not yet set. She and her BF are searching their level with each other. In a relationship which has reached its maturity no matter what the age of the people involved is..there are other things to look forward to...one can wait for the physical stuff as the relationship has so many other things to offer.

Yes the door swings both ways. Is it right for a man to string along a female if he thinks she is not right for her? Why not just let it go? As you said Branh..that is a weak man..right. So let us talk in terms of giving awareness to people. Maybe people are not aware of such patterns.

Cancerlady! you go ahead and lead life according to your terms girl. Love your cancerian sarcasm. Public hanging? LOL..forget it. Whenever we get judgemental...lets take a cold shower and sincerely pray that all the judgemental views that we carry like bag of potatoes get washed off.

Stay happy guys🙂
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cancerlady
@cancerlady
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LMAO

Thanks for the support STD, good to know you are up on the times! Food will be served though, this IS a Cancer hanging and we LOVE feeding people. LOL

Sniffle, Tear...Looneybird, I sincerely thank you for realizing what I was trying to do here. I guess this is somewhat of a confessional and the DXP folks are my priests. But you among a few others like the priest just said learn from your mistakes, a few hail mary's and get the hell on with your life. Truly, thanks!

It's so easy to judge others...but it's like that old song I used to hear on the way to church Sunday mornings

"You need to sweep around your own front door, before you try to sweep around mine!"

On another note, I did expect a few people to be totally disgusted with me, but not the men! I thought they would be on my side! No honor amongst cheaters! KIDDING!

Cancerlady

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P-Angel
@P-Angel
20 Years25,000+ PostsPisces

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Here's P-Angel's take on cheating . . .

In order for someone to be cheated on, then something has to be taken away from them or they've not been cheated.

If he's not on his knees . . . lick, lick, yum, yum, then what has been taken away from him? Same thing the other way around, right? If a woman is not humming, then if he gives it away to someone else - it's not cheating. If she/he didn't want it in the first place - there is no loss !!!!
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