This Pisces drives me insane!

I'm a Scorpio I always felt like I'd get along with them cause our kind natures. I became friends with a Pisces female when she joined my department at work. Because we work in politics hard work is expected and reps are everything if you wanna move up. Management won't fire you right away if you don't meet expectations they will just rely on what I call power players

Power players are those that have the ability to think outside the box, the change makers, the ones who never ask for help or ask questions. There's probably six of us in the entire organization. When this Pisces joined my dept we got along quickly but it wasnt until a few weeks later when I realized her dependency on people especially me. She doesn't bother remembering things, she wasnt pulling her weight, she waited for our boss to give her work instead of taking the initiative. She took long doing all projects and wanted to start her shift at 9 instead of 8 when we opened cause she lived far she said but now she lives minutes away she still comes at the same time. If her old boss wasnt in the office that's when she wanted to have lunch with me but if he was in the office then shed rather eat with him. When we did gang out she seemed to expect me to do the driving. She was always in my personal space and she had this bias about the ghetto like she was to good for it but was cheap as shit. I guess I was frustrated by her lack of integrity

I'm normally straightforward but I chose to busy myself and distance myself. We barely talk. If she approaches me ill talk back in a friendly way but I always keep it short.

It also annoys me at meetings how she acts like she knows what the topic is even when she doesn't.

Why can't she admit she doesn't know squat and ask to be trained so she can grow in her skills. Instead if pretending she has all these skills and playing games and depending on ppl so that she looks good in the end

I'm so pissed at her and mgmt is none the wiser at how unqualified she really is

Posted by ScorpioFemale79

I'm normally straightforward, but this time I decided to be passive aggressive and not say anything directly to her and instead come to vent at a bunch of Piscean strangers

Fixed it?

Lol no it's just shes just frustrating and its not key practice to start drama at work and shes a drama starter. I thought keeping busy and not speaking to her would work but shes as still smithery as ever. Any advise on what else would work

Well... now that you're being more clear about what you're looking for here... 🙂

All you can really do is control you. Do your thing your way. You can't really get caught up in the way other people operate. The best you can hope for is that the right people will tire of it and deal with it eventually. It's the hazard of the working world right? Yes it's frustrating, but your frustration is only going to detract from your own performance...

You're 33... I presume - I'm sure you've come across others you didn't mesh with professionally? What did you do in those times? Why is she, particularly, so grating to you?

My advice is simply to stop focusing on her as best you can. I realize that inter-office workings might make that more difficult at some times than others - but there isn't a whole lot you can do? You can't change her, and you risk looking petty or manipulative if you start to make it your goal to get someone to do something about it...

which would put YOUR reputation at stake....

Exactly. I didn't confront cause shed start drama and I would look petty. I've worked with people I didn't get along with before in past jobs and they stayed away but with her shes always smothering me still. I barely talk to her, I turn down lunch invites when her usual lunch buddy isn't available, on holidays I gave some people Christmas gifts that showed I put thought into it and she wasnt one of those people.

I've been keeping busy but she will use my work keys to open her office cause she doesn't like carrying them (she shouldn't have requested keys then). I don't want her to keep expecting she can borrowing my things or make comments about when I come into work I open some people's doors not hers (hers is down the hall I just sometimes go the ones near me but not always). Ill find my presentation cause she doesn't want to get her equipment out if the storage closet down the wall where she put it

I'm trying to do my own thing but shes not respecting my space and she thinks its ok to be lazy

@88 that's y I'm so bewildered. She's nothing like you. When she first transferred to our dept she was lazy from the beginning. But top mgmt asked her to help her old boss 2 days a week and work with our projects the other 3 days. Probably she liked doing her old projects she spent most of her time helping her old boss shed never pull her own weight in our dept. she'd wait until she was assigned something take forever to do it. Some days shed volunteer for projects then butch about how she had alot of projects (4). I'd always get annoyed at that comment and I'd say try my 30 projects and running an entire department—? Shed ignore it and still complain.

She boasted about how creative her designs were but she always emulated designs in graphic art books lol. For someone who likes to make it seem like shes has all these skills is dependent on ppl like me. She needs to stop bothering me so much

Posted by ScorpioFemale79
Exactly. I didn't confront cause shed start drama and I would look petty. I've worked with people I didn't get along with before in past jobs and they stayed away but with her shes always smothering me still. I barely talk to her, I turn down lunch invites when her usual lunch buddy isn't available, on holidays I gave some people Christmas gifts that showed I put thought into it and she wasnt one of those people.

I've been keeping busy but she will use my work keys to open her office cause she doesn't like carrying them (she shouldn't have requested keys then). I don't want her to keep expecting she can borrowing my things or make comments about when I come into work I open some people's doors not hers (hers is down the hall I just sometimes go the ones near me but not always). Ill find my presentation cause she doesn't want to get her equipment out if the storage closet down the wall where she put it

I'm trying to do my own thing but shes not respecting my space and she thinks its ok to be lazy

Well it sounds like you need to pull the straightforward.
Stop allowing her to utilize you? She will get the point eventually.
If you allow her to borrow your things, why wouldn't she continue to think it is ok?
Stop coddling her? If you don't teach her to respect your space, she won't.
For her it is ok to be lazy. She has no problem with her laziness, you do. So stop enabling her laziness?

I don't know, I'm grasping at straws because I'm not there to witness what happens.

It's that whole thing about teaching her what way is acceptable to treat you. It's not about creating drama. It's just about being firm for what is best for your career. You can't let her drag you down - which is what it sounds like you feel is happening.

Also, if you've been a bit passive thus far... don't expect a change over night from her.
You dug a bit of a hole - by not being clear from the get go. (Or so it sounds like that is what happened).
So now the consequence of that action lies with you. Do the ground work, and wait for the result.

All business with her. If she requests assistance "Sorry, I can't, I'm really swamped."
If she whines about not opening her door "Sorry, I really just do it as a courtesy for those nearest to me because it doesn't put me out of my way - it's not my obligation"
If she wants to use something of yours "Oh, I'm going to need it soon" or something along those lines.

The point is - you can't just give in to her for fear of being petty, and then expect that she will know that she is out of line because you "distance" yourself. That's quite the leap to expect of any human being (not just a pisces).

You're going to have to find a way to speak up or be more firm with her. Not run away from it.

I have made comments in the past. Like with the opening her office door shes made comments as to y I don't open hers and u said " why would i". I said with the keys thing i said you need to use your keys. Sometimes she nabs my keys without looking and all of a sudden she comes back gives it back to me and laughs and says I lock my door when I go somewhere. On Friday she called my office to borrow my keys to open one of the event rooms but because I was I'm another department she borrowed our bosses keys. She has keys to all conference rooms and event rooms. She has three keys. One is to all offices. One is for all event rooms and one is for all conference rooms. Yet she assumes her keys are to some mysterious location in the sky I guess

I have had a talk with my boss about this with coming across as petty but he pretty much figured out what I meant and he said he told her doing her evaluation she needs to pull her weight. She said ok. But she never did. He's more aware of her mistakes and her using the system. She works harder with projects she likes which is only the ones she helps her old boss with. But yet she still is surprisingly dependent and always has to be reminded about everything. Is bossy unless shes dependent on you

But I guess ignoring isnt working. I'm going to say screw looking petty I'm going to lock my door whenever I leave, never answer her calls, and if she makes comments ill be frank. I don't care anymore

There ya go!

There's really no reason to beat around the bush with her. She obviously needs to have her resources yanked. However she is coming about them. There are plenty of these people out there. She just seems to hit your nerve a bit more directly....

Best of luck with it! Being direct will free your brain from it. I don't think you'll look petty, she might just start consider you a bit of a bitch - and well... at this point - I wager you don't really give a damn 🙂

I honestly don't give a damn but I guess the frustration stemmed from me feeling like I can't do anything about it. Like I said before we work in politics where being a power player (making changes/waves to the community) and hard work and professionalism is expected.

We are expected to be nice and professional with everyone. Which is hard for me because integrity is everything to me. If I'm carrying the weight of the entire department because of ppl like her are lazy. I'm going to get pissed. While alot of people have been let go it took a while for it to happen. I've worked hard and am one of 6 people who the top management sees as a power player/ an asset. Especially these past few months when I decided to ignore her crap and focus more on doing big things that affects the economy and community

But lately shes starting to be really dependent and annoying and making comments like she never sees me around anymore and all this stupid key crap.

haha well... like you said - it takes a while before someone is fired. Generally.

Also, the "power players" wouldn't exist (in terms of identified as such) - if everyone was one.... right?

I get what you are saying, and can see where the frustration stems, but it literally has nothing to do with how you do your job. It's a personal annoyance at best. I'm not seeing any claims of her taking you down, or trying to make you look bad. Everything she's doing is either just pesky, or making herself look bad. Why that would bother you.... only you can answer.

Yup you make good points

It probably is personal but shes on the same title and pay level as me and she doesn't earn it. She's probably doing enough to not get fired. People like her don't deserve to work here.

@eusivesoul. Yeah she is the only one ive lost respect for. I'm not sure what other posts you are referring to.

@88nn not jealous. I'm actually happy if she actually left me alone. But it's annoying when she nabs my keys all the time cause she never likes carrying her own or doesn't remember what her 3 keys are for yet she tries to make herself seem smart. She always asks me when her meetings are. And it's like how should I know. She forgets to ho to her meetings. But yet if its one i have to go to she wants to know what happened. It's like she's an adult yet is oddly not self sufficient with the most basic things. I just want her to learn to think for herself and not waste my time by bothering me with her common sense things

@88 where I work I can actually get reprimanded for not being courteous/ helpful thats y haven't been direct. Plus my comments never worked on her either like when I said comments like

You should really start using your keys
I don't know when your meeting is why aren't you checking your calendar

Doesn't seem to stop her from being all needy

Maybe I should just be mean idgaf at this point lol

@88 exactly. I'm not elf employed but I guess cause of my work ethic my boss lets me run the show as if I was an equal. I take it as a compliment and as such i take the responsibility seriously. Her lack of common sense is snnoying

I agree with you. That's how I feel too.

Are you sure there's no possibility that she knows you get annoyed at it, but is passively getting revenge on you cause she thinks you're a bitch? I guess that's kind of far out there and really juvenile...but she doesn't seem to take her job very seriously or care too much, and I usually find with people like that, they are secret bitches. Not always, albeit, and I'm still young, so my experiences may hold less value in these work situations. I just thought I'd throw that out there. Equally as possible, she really doesn't know how much it bothers you.

In the end, that matters little. I would just let it go. Cut her off from using you, and eventually, if she doesn't pull her weight or slips up, the boss will be the judge. You said he was already aware of her behavior, correct? So, I'm sure he'll take more notice of complaints or bad behavior with her because of this and may draw the line somewhere, right?

@scenic. I think she just doesn't get it. As I said our boss treats me as an equal which I appreciate but also I think it's because she doesn't pull her weight so the burden is all on me. While I do appreciate the compliment. I'd like to be able to relax and do nothing all day lol like she seems to be going sometimes. Integrity is a must for me in terms of respect and who I want around me.

U just hate the fact that she tries to act like shes intelligent only goes to high end stores and refuses to live in anything but high end neighborhoods but is a cheapskate. I remember one time she was mad at her old boss who she went to lunch with all the time but now that she was mad she wanted to go with me all the time and it became an expectation from her for me to drive and when I refused she copped an attitude even when I did not go to lunch with her. At lunches shed be a cheapskate.

She was always in my personal space asking all these questions and wanting to know everything. But yet when I had this problem at work with another individual she said she didn't care and didn't wanna know

So if you add all these things up: her being fake, a slacker, cheapskate, non generous , arrogant, dependent, and probably used others. That's why I lost respect and want nothing to do with her. So I've been embracing my hardworking and have been focusing on that especially when now I'm seen as one if 6 key ppl in the company.

She just still keeps bothering me even tho I haven't had a solid convo in months. She borrows my work stuff whether I'm in my office or not and I cannot be an ass cause we have to be nice at work.

Snd Pisces people are supposed to be nice. Even the description of this forum says they are. I just feel like the times she was generous it was only cause she was expecting something in return

Like Xmas time she gave ppl in our department each a candy cane. I brought everyone in the company goodie bags on behalf of our dept

So no one other than my aqua crush in my department got something. She saw the goodie bags in my office in my dept and asked who was that for and I said the other departments. She gave me this look like she wanted one lol

Whatever.

I didn't leave her out i gave all the other departments a goodie bag that said it was from our department. If she doesn't care about certain things then y doesn't make it a point to ask me y I didn't answer the phone when she called. Didnt think maybe i was not in my office. Or giving an attitude when I declined lunch invites or the goodie bags were for other departments. It's like she has this way of being bossy or making these comments when she doesn't get her way.

Moons I wouldn't know lol. How do I figure that out

My crush? He socializes with her like he does everyone else. But he's been talking to everyone less i guess ever since around the time I stopped being mad at him which is a coincidence but that's another story.

She's a Pisces. I thought they were compassionate and moral like scorpios are. But like I said I stopped talking to her when I realized as time went on that all she seemed to care about is living high class, how she tries to take the easy way out and acts like she knows what ppl are talking about when she really doesn't. I mean she doesn't pay attention to her work calendar unless its things she likes doing (projects with her old dept), if its anything with ours she shows up late, doesn't remember, doesn't contribute. For example....

We are having a conference in February we are on the committee. She didnt say anything during brainstorming and didnt say anything when we got to choose what we want to be in charge of. At the end shes like uh I don't have anything to do. She got put in charge of logistics making sure the conference agenda runs smoothly the day if the event. How is she gonna do that if she doesn't try to be a part if the planning. She shows up to be a part of the meetings but doesn't try and help us out the conference together. If she isn't paying attention to how the agenda is then how is she gonna coordinate logistics? Everyone else is doing all the work and updating each other

I mean dies she have no shame. I mean if I didn't have to be around her I'd be happy.

That is why I do my own thing because I rather focus on what I need to do at work rather than deal with her all the time. She needs to just bother someone else

I'm not gonna lie I have my my own personal issues with pisces some men actually, but the woman are sweethearts and the men as well. they will help you in a time of need.Her way of doing things is not your way of doing things, people are different! The thing with pisces people, they are easy going in what ever they do and they take the easy going way of life so they may seem less stressed and or uninterested in things but it's not the case I can tell you this you don't know exactly what is going on in her personal life, although you were friends you don't really know whats going on because pisces people in general do not divulge everything, they have to keep some things personal secret.If they feel that you are much of a good friend then they will tell you everything but in this case she tried to be your friend she thought you were her friend but you are clearly not and so she moves on and makes new friends and people like her because in general pisces are likeable people.also pisces people have a tendency to forget its a pisces thing be only concerned about yourself and feel good about your work ethic if hers is lacking let the big bosses handle it not your concern.just saying

Good point. But that's the thing she barely tries to talk to anyone. She only talks and hangs out with her old boss. If hes not around whether its a day or a week then she bugs me. She should try not only bring self sufficient but befriending someone other than me

She already crossed the point of no return with this Scorpio lol

"She's a Pisces. I thought they were compassionate and moral like scorpios are."

Not all Pisces are compassionate and moral and not all Scorps are compassionate and moral like..

The problems you see in her may have nothing to do with her being a Pisces..And yes you are working yourself up
over something you have no control over.Thats the diffrence between a Pisces and a Scorp Pisces tend to just flow
and dance to their own beat..

Ok striking you are right. But for someone who tries to look intelligent she really has no common sense. Ever! You'd be surprised how often we had to tell her common sense things that she doesn't even try to remember

lol threatened? from what I'm in a higher position.

What i am upset about is I hate the fact that me doing my job kind of became a burden. You have a job you should do it. So that's what I did.

Little did I know that I'd be so indispensible that if someone like her didn't do their job its "ok" cause the world isn't falling apart (because im the one that keeps things going).

God forbid I slack off. I'll probably get in trouble.

I'm terribly surprised that you don't know this happens all the time by now...
This is not a unique scenario - and you are SO hung up on it... which is really only hurting yourself. In true scorp fashion, might I add.

I dunno, maybe you just need somewhere to let it out - which, cool. But you are searching for logic and understanding, where there likely isn't going to be any. The world sucks. Welcome 🙂

Haha the world does

Lol. I'm well aware it happens but I like to believe that sometimes people aren't selfish assholes. And in her true fashion shes getting worse and shes starting to get bossier and expecting to be catered to lol. But seems to sorta be working is me focusing on my work and limiting as much contact as possible

Tho she still tries to bug me when her old boss that she bugs for everything is not available, so I keep declining whether she gets offended or not. I'm sorry but work I'd more important that her not wanting to pick up her lunch by herself