Age gaps in relationships

Interesting topic! I've always wondered where people stood on it. I've heard anywhere from "age knows no love", to "it's okay...but there is a limit", to "no way and hell! Ew to anything more than a few years."

Personally, I think whatever makes you happy. It's entirely dependent on the people involved, the maturity of the couple and how they can look. Yes, I have known people in their early 20s have more maturity and their ducks in a row, vs some 40 year olds. I have also seen some people in their late 30s-40s look younger/better than some in their late 20s!

For me personally, I have dated up to 20 years my senior. All my friends we 30s-50s, we met through friends. However, that was a huge gap. It was fun and there was a connection, but I think just TOO much. Reading online, 6-15 years seems to be the acceptable and working age range. Past then, meh. Again, it also depends on the people and their baggage etc. I know people in their late 30s who haven't been married and no kids, and then multiple marriages with a myriad of kids.

After my much older experience, I have set my personal limit on 14 years depending how active they are and how they look(the 43 year old actually looked slightly older), and degree of baggage.


Where do YOU stand on this?

*"age knows no limit"

Oh well I forgot to say, pretty legal. I mean, 21+ for the youngest person. It can get pretty trick for even 19 and 23 to work if there is so much they can't do together because the under 21.

I would have a harder time dating someone who was 19 or 20 at 24, vs 14-15 years older than me if they were in good shape and looked good.

It's hard to believe anyone under 21 is mature, 17 is still a child.

Oh true...I suppose it would be different in that case. Yes, I am American but I'm German. My family is pretty liberal in, we don't justify age on friends and there is a more liberal acceptable age gap than some Americans.

Some people I went to school with even find it weird that I hang out with 30-50 year olds but I don't discriminate by age. I have friends my age, and some even younger. It depends on the ppl and what you have in common. Social norms and judgement can weigh heavy on some people.

My man is 12 years younger than me. I'm good & happy.

That's a good change of pace! Usually it's the guy that's older, don't see too many women who are quite a bit older.

Good for you, you must be hot 😉

Posted by Agentgem24


It's hard to believe anyone under 21 is mature, 17 is still a child.

It all depends on circumstances. Yes a person can be mature at that age. My grandmothers mother died when she was 10 years old. She was the eldest of 5 children. She had to take on the responsibility for them.

When a child has to take on adult responsibility, it does mature them.

Posted by Agentgem24
That's a good change of pace! Usually it's the guy that's older, don't see too many women who are quite a bit older.

Good for you, you must be hot 😉

Thanks! Not to toot my own horn but uh...*toot* 😛

He looks older than me & I look really young. Some people think I'm a kid when they encounter me. It's a blessing to be able to still fit into clothing from HS. 🙂

Posted by Aleese76

Posted by RealTalk

Posted by Agentgem24
That's a good change of pace! Usually it's the guy that's older, don't see too many women who are quite a bit older.

Good for you, you must be hot 😉

Thanks! Not to toot my own horn but uh...*toot* 😛

He looks older than me & I look really young. Some people think I'm a kid when they encounter me. It's a blessing to be able to still fit into clothing from HS. 🙂

You're bad mamma-jamma......LOL I get that, "YOU're how old—" expression too, but it is very difficult for me to date younger than me. When I was really young, I dated guys as much as 15 years older than me. Now, I'm 37, so I don't want a guy no more than 8 years older, unless he's super-duper hot!!!!

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Thanks. You do look younger.

Yeah I wouldn't do 20 again. But with all my friends in their 30s and 40s I'm bound to find someone that I click with in the 6-15 year more range, I find nothing wrong with that.

Now when I was online dating, I wouldn't put more than a 8 year difference for people contacting me, but I'm backing off from that for awhile.

I tried dating 2 years younger once...he was 21. BAD idea lol.

I am seeing a man 12 years my junior and I don't think it makes any difference other than, sometimes I feel I am giving too many suggestions.

I always dated 10+ men. Now it is the younger man I like. The one before the 12-yr age gap guy is 16 yrs younger. I could feel the difference of age with him.

After you reach a certain age, the age gap somewhat equals out. Also as you said, Agentgem24, some are emotionally more or less mature. Emotional maturity will add itself to your relationship regardless of age.

For example, it is said of Capricorn men that they start as the old man of the zodiac, but get younger maturity wise as they age. I can attest to that. The 40s-something Cap guy becomes like a 20-something guy.

Everyone is different, lets put a spin in the situation.

You have two people who are in a relationship with one another. There is an age gap. The couple have an offspring. Now that the offspring is in a relationship with someone and so happens that the age gap is the same as the one with their parents.

What would be interesting is if the parents did not approve of their offspring being in a relationship with someone cause of the age gap. Hypocritical!

I prefer dating older. But yes 15 is a limit as you said FUM it can be felt if too big.

The last guy I was with, was 6 months younger than me. We had very little in common. I loved classic rock and culture and he was all about crappy rap music and going out to drink way to much and party. The things he said annoyed me and my friends didn't like him. He asked why all my friends were so old, and I asked why all his friends were so young and immature lol. There was so much tension because of how incompatible we were, it just took a few months to finally realize how bad.

I realize I need more intellectual stimulation and someone who shares my same interests however "old" they may be. He asked why I didn't act my age and I didn't know how to take it, it was just me.

He are all my choc cereal, and asked me to pick him up pizza lunchables at the store. I may have been dating a 5 year old....! His jokes were very crass and offensive.

*ate

Also, when dating older, do you expect the older one to pay for mostly everything? Or do you take turns, budget etc and be fair?

Every one I've dated has been 2 years older, same age as me, 1 year younger, or 2 years younger. I've hooked up with bigger gaps though. Oldest I've knocked boots with were 16 years older and 19 years older. 😆

I dated a guy 19 years my senior. He was emotionally immature. He was never married and no children. Quite disappointing for a man near 50. smh

Posted by Agentgem24
Also, when dating older, do you expect the older one to pay for mostly everything? Or do you take turns, budget etc and be fair?

He paid. I did offer and he rejected it. But I left tips sometimes.

Younger men are attracted to me... Up to 10 years younger. The older I get, the more I like it.

I loooooove younger guys. YES YES YESSSS! Im 34 but the lowest I will go now is (depending on the situation and his maturity level) is 23/24.

Posted by Xin
I loooooove younger guys. YES YES YESSSS! Im 34 but the lowest I will go now is (depending on the situation and his maturity level) is 23/24.

🙂

Posted by Aleese76

Posted by Agentgem24
Also, when dating older, do you expect the older one to pay for mostly everything? Or do you take turns, budget etc and be fair?

I take turns and budget to be fair. I find that dating older men give them the "father" tendency and that pisses me off. I do not like to be restricted and put into a box. I purposely rebel.

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I like it! ....but they have to have an imagination.

I noticed that I either date ones younger than me or the same age. One was 23 (we're also still friends) who's so much fun and knew when to work and to play which is very refreshing compared to immature 40 year olds I went out with trying to be players. And the recent sweetheart is 30 and is fun and proactive also. So yes like R Kelly said age is just a number. Maturity and how you were raised means everything.