in love, but also in love with ...

Hi everyone

I have this weird question:

Could somebody be in love with someone and have a serious relationship,

While he or she is actually also in love with someone they have seen in a train !
(wich he or she was too shy too tell that person in the train ).

Tell me your experiences / thoughts !

I believe what you feel with this person on the train, is lust. Its not to say that lust couldn't turn into love (if you were single). But then again, love may mean different things to different people.

And, Yes, i have experienced the same thing. At first i was really confused by it, but I soon realized that we are human and attraction can happen at any moment, without any warning and it can't be controlled. Sometimes, the attaction is so strong we can confuse it for love.

infatuation ?

(Can't get it translated) what do you mean !?

Well, i'm only dating someone now. Not really a real love yet !( i still feel more love for my readhead than for her... )

It's not LUST, i really think i blew my chances with that redhead since i haven't seen her for a while at the trains...

i'm keeping the hope to see her again.... am thinking of what to say ...

something like: " I don't know how to tell it properly, ... but i fell in love with you since i first saw you in the train ....."

Boyfromutrecht,

I hope you find her then (your Redhead). True love is hard to find.

And, i take back what i said before about confusing lust for love. I thought about it, and i believe i have told myself this because it is easier than admitting i may have lost my True Love. Sorry for misleading you. I wasn't being objective in offering my comments to you.

Again, i really hope you find her, if nothing else to ease your mind and your heart.

By the way, not that it has any relevance to your situation, but my "true love" lives in Holland and i am in Canada. Life can be such a tease !!

LOL ! Move to Holland then ! If you really love her , you 2 have to make a decision to be with eachother !,

Thanks for your apoligies, they're accepted 😛. where does she lives in NL?

He is from Breda, but is currently in Vlaardingen.

It so complicated actually, but you never know .... :-)

i actually don't know, Tanya ...

maybe i just wanted to try a new challenge. you know, trying to forget her and love someone else. But since SPRING is almost in the air ... it's all getting back ..

the first time i saw her was in the spring of 2006 ....
You don't want to know what i did for her to even get close to her...

waited for hours at a train since i thought i knew on wich day she would took a train ...

True Tanya023. Also, i do believe in love at first site - i believe the hearts of two people can connect without any real physical contact, and i do believe when you experience something like this - you shouldn't waste it. Life can change in a "snap" - if you know what you need to do to have what your true heart desires, then do it!

Don't get me wrong, i realize it is easier said than done ... if fact, no one knows better than i do ...

Obviously you have never experienced it before. It is not about imagination ... it is about "the law of attraction"

so .. if someone is in love with a girl he saw in the train. And he experiences love after almost sawing her a year ago > that's true love ?

i think that the snap is over. i don't see her anymore @ the trains.i might have ruined my chances. still hoping that she will be @ the Bluesroute festival in my village ..

BREAKTHROUGH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I saw my red angel !!!

I was just walking in Utrecht with a friend who works at La Place. He had a day off but he wanted to visit his college's and drink something. So we went walking and what do i see at the salad desk ? MY REDHEAD !!! i couldn't believe it !fate is playing funny games with me !. I'm attempting to work at there since she is there too and i will be introduced to her as a colleque !. + i will work with my best mate, Maarten!.

I'm so excited !!!!

BFU - why don't you just go talk to her now that you know how to find her? Why wait to get a job there? The "universe" has presented her to you for a reason ... go find out why.

By the way, that is very exiting news! I am happy you found her, but please don't forget to be respectful to your current girlfriend. You will need to make a choice.

quote: Sherob"BFU - why don't you just go talk to her now that you know how to find her?"

I'm not the guy who goes flirting when she is standing with a colleque !. btw ! my friend Maarten found out her name: Milou !. I couldn't just walk to her since i had to get the train withing a short time !. I'm thinking of sending her a Valentines card. Explaining her my situation. Funny detail : She is Libra ! Opposites attract (i'm Aries). Now hopefully she is open for a relation.

BFU - my mother is a Libra and my father is an Aries and they have been married for 38 years. They definitely have their arguements, but each of them says one can not exist without the other. They have passion and they love each other.

By the way, how did you find out so fast that she is a Libra?

I'm not saying Aries and Libra doesn't work !. Althou, my brother is a Libra and i can't get along with hi mostly. Hoping that she will be different i really wanna try her.

I know she's Libra because i found her on the "profilewebsite" http://www.hyves.nl when filling in her name. There aren't many girls with that name. Her birthsday is the 20th of september.

Well if it is meant to be and you guys are able to get together, i am sure you can make it work if you want to. I have 3 Libra's in my life and they are the easiest people to get along with - honestly, they are just always happy and balanced ... they can't make a quick decision if their life depended on it, but very easy to get along with.

Good Luck BFU ... i will keep my fingers crossed for you :-)

Hey Tany023, i really do see your point about stalking, but i don't get the impression that BFU is the kind of guy to take it that far (at least i hope he's not). I have told him already that he does need to make a choice between his girlfriend and this redhead. What i haven't said is life is too short and he is very young. I see no reason why he shouldn't pursue this girl if he believes that they could have a future together. Even if "the future" is very brief - at least he didn't let her pass him by and question the rest of his life "what if?". I also don't believe in fate alone - all fate does is present the opportunity to you - it is up to you to follow through and make it happen.

Again, i do see your point though, so BFU be careful not to Stalk and be respectful to your current girlfriend. Man, i sound like a mother don't I!

*update*

So yesterday Milou added me on MSN. I had sended her a Valentines Card with my MSN adress in it. So we talked and she said that she couldn't be my red angel, because she have never been in Maarssen, nor takes the train from Maarssen to Utrecht.

I thanked her for her co-operation. I feel dissapointed cuz i realy thought i found her. There are so many girls who look like my red angel !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

I'm gonna keep searching for her.

BFU, take comfort in knowing that at least you tried. If your Red Angel is meant to be yours, you will find her. Until, move forward and focus on your current relationship. Sometimes events happen in our lives for a reason.