Taurus dude

I've already formed my own view of the situation, but I'm just curious of the insight of others.

So recently, this Taurus guy, that I had a few classes with, got back in touch. We'd Facebooked eachother back then for something school related. Occasionally, I go through my Facebook friends and delete those who don't really communicate/keep in touch because, what's the point in having them on there, you know?

That said, this dude was one I never heard from post graduation. I think maybe ONCE, but that was it. Within the last year, I took him off of Facebook.

Lo and behold, earlier this year, he wants to add me again, all out of the blue. I thought it was a tad odd considering we didn't really talk a ton at school, and we never really communicated via Facebook, either. Meh, whatever. I went ahead and allowed the add.

Several weeks go by and he messages me, making small talk. Wants to text instead. ...Okay. I think that was like April or so.

Since then, contact is sporadic- he initiates contact once every week or two. Small talk, usually when he's bored or has time off from work and whatnot, aka nothing to do. He's also subtly and not to subtly hinted about us hanging out sometime. Most recently, I got a text from him last Saturday, about 8pm. Tonight, it was another text, around 7ish. Coincidence?


To be honest, I'm a tad annoyed.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
I've already formed my own view of the situation, but I'm just curious of the insight of others.

So recently, this Taurus guy, that I had a few classes with, got back in touch. We'd Facebooked eachother back then for something school related. Occasionally, I go through my Facebook friends and delete those who don't really communicate/keep in touch because, what's the point in having them on there, you know?

That said, this dude was one I never heard from post graduation. I think maybe ONCE, but that was it. Within the last year, I took him off of Facebook.

Lo and behold, earlier this year, he wants to add me again, all out of the blue. I thought it was a tad odd considering we didn't really talk a ton at school, and we never really communicated via Facebook, either. Meh, whatever. I went ahead and allowed the add.

Several weeks go by and he messages me, making small talk. Wants to text instead. ...Okay. I think that was like April or so.

Since then, contact is sporadic- he initiates contact once every week or two. Small talk, usually when he's bored or has time off from work and whatnot, aka nothing to do. He's also subtly and not to subtly hinted about us hanging out sometime. Most recently, I got a text from him last Saturday, about 8pm. Tonight, it was another text, around 7ish. Coincidence?


To be honest, I'm a tad annoyed.

Yeah he's interested but probably doesn't know how to say it. Is him not being straightforward annoying you or is it his being sporadic. Don't know if you're currently dating but take a peek and go out with him. Shouldn't hurt_??_

I'm annoyed because he came at me out of left field. Guys just don't randomly get in touch for no reason just because.

It'd be different if we'd actually known each other more in school. I barely know the guy aside from a few school related conversations, which is why I find it kind of weird he suddenly wants to get in touch and talk (barely). He drops out of the middle of text convos too, only to pick up again a week or two later.

If he's interested, he's interested, fine. I'm not. I've actually been quite turned off with the shitty communication and obvious timing of it all. It feels like he's trying to seek filler for an emotional need, not out of genuine interest. He's only in touch when he's bored, and it's been Saturday nights, as if he wants to attempt last minute plans.

My gut instinct just does not care for the vibe of the situation is all. I know it sounds mean, because he could very well be interested, could have liked me in school from the few instances we were in touch, who knows. He IS an earth sign.

But the way it's being handled is stupid and comes off as kinda opportunistic.

Nobody else finds the random ass contact kinda strange?

Posted by rockyroadicecream
I'm annoyed because he came at me out of left field. Guys just don't randomly get in touch for no reason just because.

It'd be different if we'd actually known each other more in school. I barely know the guy aside from a few school related conversations, which is why I find it kind of weird he suddenly wants to get in touch and talk (barely). He drops out of the middle of text convos too, only to pick up again a week or two later.

If he's interested, he's interested, fine. I'm not. I've actually been quite turned off with the shitty communication and obvious timing of it all. It feels like he's trying to seek filler for an emotional need, not out of genuine interest. He's only in touch when he's bored, and it's been Saturday nights, as if he wants to attempt last minute plans.

My gut instinct just does not care for the vibe of the situation is all. I know it sounds mean, because he could very well be interested, could have liked me in school from the few instances we were in touch, who knows. He IS an earth sign.

But the way it's being handled is stupid and comes off as kinda opportunistic.

Nobody else finds the random ass contact kinda strange?

Is it weird? Yeah I agree. But you have to admit, its par for the course nowadays in dating. And it does seem like all that you say. Heck, ask him what he wants. He'll either step up or bolt.

Seriously.

It just gets old when you get approached by those who aren't doing it out of interest, but out of a personal need for something. People treat dating like a band aid. I'm nobody's band aid, tyvm.

Given the state that I live in, I pick up on that vibe so fast anymore though. I know my approach to this seems bitchy, but people here are that ridiculous. :/

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Seriously.

It just gets old when you get approached by those who aren't doing it out of interest, but out of a personal need for something. People treat dating like a band aid. I'm nobody's band aid, tyvm.

Given the state that I live in, I pick up on that vibe so fast anymore though. I know my approach to this seems bitchy, but people here are that ridiculous. :/

Feel you and yes the whole dropping off in the middle of a convo and only hitting you up on a certain day is annoying given the fact that its obvious. But look on the bright said, he's basically showing you. I guess you're simply wanting to be approached differently and that's understandable. You can see what's up and give him the benefit of the doubt but on further thought, it may be best to just leave him be and keep it moving.

Bright side

Posted by beautifulsoul74

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Seriously.

It just gets old when you get approached by those who aren't doing it out of interest, but out of a personal need for something. People treat dating like a band aid. I'm nobody's band aid, tyvm.

Given the state that I live in, I pick up on that vibe so fast anymore though. I know my approach to this seems bitchy, but people here are that ridiculous. :/

Feel you and yes the whole dropping off in the middle of a convo and only hitting you up on a certain day is annoying given the fact that its obvious. But look on the bright said, he's basically showing you. I guess you're simply wanting to be approached differently and that's understandable. You can see what's up and give him the benefit of the doubt but on further thought, it may be best to just leave him be and keep it moving.

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Differently? As far as I'm concerned, this isn't even considered a valid type of approach, as it's lazy and half assed. Shy guys have better approaches than bs like this. It's like, "really? This is how you're doing it? Why the fuck are you wasting my time? Ain't nobody got time for this shit."

I have no problem with giving the benefit of the doubt. ...Which is why I give guys like these a bit of a chance- like giving this dude my number. It's just unfortunate that my gut has been correct in instances like this. ...to which yes, I just keep on moving.


But like I said, I posted this because I've already come to my own conclusions, but am curious to see if anyone else sees the wtfery involved here. I mean really, randomly sniffing around 2 years of no contact? That doesn't strike you the least but suspicious in a sense?

Lol yeah usually to suddenly come back after such a long break would mean that on his part at least there is unfinished business. Maybe he liked you all through class but was too shy to say?
I would be suspicious like you, but you say he has not so subtly mentioned hanging out. That's fairly direct isn't it? What did you answer?

Lol yeah it is lazy and half assed. Suspicious? In a sense yes. Do you think there's more to it besides him trying to hook up or something?

Posted by AriesGirl74
Lol yeah usually to suddenly come back after such a long break would mean that on his part at least there is unfinished business. Maybe he liked you all through class but was too shy to say?
I would be suspicious like you, but you say he has not so subtly mentioned hanging out. That's fairly direct isn't it? What did you answer?

It is direct, and good for him, but that's not the problem. For someone supposedly being interested, he sure is being lazy and half assed about it. If it were genuine interest, I'd hear from him more often and not when he's bored/has nothing to do, is trying to attempt last minute plans with me.

I'd prefer not to waste my time on such bs, tbh. It's just maddening guys pull crap like this and think it's quite okay to do so.

Posted by beautifulsoul74
Lol yeah it is lazy and half assed. Suspicious? In a sense yes. Do you think there's more to it besides him trying to hook up or something?

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The way it comes off it's as if he's dropping in here and there to see what he can get out of the situation. I dunno, the whole vibe is weird. Doesn't sit right with me is all.

Posted by Lust
Hi Rockyroadicecream, your feeling about this dude is so right. You are a smart woman & kind hearted one. Only a guy who can appriciate your value & sincere enough would deserve your time & devotion.
Keep doing your theng woman, don't settle. Your future will be bright & full of happiness.

Thanks.

It's just disappointing because it's not like I'm not open to ideas, it's just the dumb shit that comes along with anyone who could be potential. It's like ugh, ANOTHER one? Gtfo of here with that noise. :/

Posted by cheekyfaerie
Alright. I gotta chime in. My .02? He's seeing how little he can get away with and still get a return. It's half hearted interest at best. I'd be wary. Hell, was reading your posts and got wary for you!

In a similar situation myself with a Taurus guy. Not that I think they all show interest the same, but I can feel this guy's persistence. We've talked every day for the better part of a month, he'll let me know when he's at work that the replies might be shorter, asks questions and remembers answers...

Get the impression that if a Taurus guy really has you in his sights, you'll know it.

Exactly. And that's true for any guy, really. If you have to question if he's really into you, chances are that he isn't. You'll KNOW. When I first experienced that with a guy, it was like wow, they aren't kidding. Ever since then, it's been easier to weed out the half assed douchebags.

I had a Taurus guy that acted the same way. His communication was definitely lacking/habits were terrible/very sporadic, but when we were together, he was all focused on me. Maybe your guy is a poor communicator too? I say give it a try. Maybe he will get better as he gets more comfortable with you. Some ppl are really slow with putting themselves out there. If it doesn't work out, what have you wasted? A few hours...maybe a cpl times? If you are still not feeling it, cut him loose.

Why should I give it a try if I'm not interested? All interest went out the door when he gave off the vibe that I'm some go to when he's bored/has nobody else to keep him occupied. I'm not wasting my time on shit like that, sorry. I only posted this because I thought maybe I was just being a hard ass and imagining the wtfery, or maybe it was some weird earth sign thing.

And why do people assume the female owes the guy a chance despite her lack of interest? He is not entitled to my time or attention just because he's giving me this baffling, piss poor attempt of showing "interest."

And there's no point of trying it out, giving him false hope, when I have zero interest to begin with. That's just an immature and cruel way of thinking, tbh. I'd rather nip it in the bud early and not be one of those twats who lead a guy on for a little bit before ignoring texts like a child.

Some of you seriously need to get your shit together.

Posted by aurora
1. 2 years for taurus is nothing.
2. He is interested, in what way - that's pretty much up to you.
3. He is not trying too hard cause he doesn't want to be boring - seen it often with earth signs.
4. There is a chance that he wants you to make the first move.

If you really want to see what's he up to, ask him to go for a drink and see for yourself. You don't have anything to lose and after you can easily stop responding to his messages.

The piss poor effort and dull convo is already making him boring. If that's truly the approach, he's failing at it. :/

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Why should I give it a try if I'm not interested? All interest went out the door when he gave off the vibe that I'm some go to when he's bored/has nobody else to keep him occupied. I'm not wasting my time on shit like that, sorry. I only posted this because I thought maybe I was just being a hard ass and imagining the wtfery, or maybe it was some weird earth sign thing.

And why do people assume the female owes the guy a chance despite her lack of interest? He is not entitled to my time or attention just because he's giving me this baffling, piss poor attempt of showing "interest."

And there's no point of trying it out, giving him false hope, when I have zero interest to begin with. That's just an immature and cruel way of thinking, tbh. I'd rather nip it in the bud early and not be one of those twats who lead a guy on for a little bit before ignoring texts like a child.

Some of you seriously need to get your shit together.

I didn't realize you had zero interest...thought you were just questioning his motivations. If there's no attraction whatsoever then by all means, don't waste your time or his. Tell him that though, so he can move on & quit bothering you.

Digging this post back up because I saw this guy at work today. He may have seen me considering my station was right next to where he was sitting, but who knows since it was a really busy night. I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to avoid convo. I know I really didn't feel like making it known that I was there and get a convo going.

I was highly amused because he was with a chick. My gut wasn't that far off- looks like he found what he'd been nosing around for!.


Btw, he ended up dropping off the map shortly after I posted this topic because I intentionally scared him off. It was quite effective in getting him to go away haha.

Posted by Ssupes


What if he just really wants to hangout and chill with ya? Has he asked you "out" like a "date"?

I have peeps on my FB that I never talk to. Just peeps I knew in school. They now have husbands and kids. Just seeing others lives with no communication is cool. No need to say Hi or that kinda BS.

Does it hurt anything for them to see you on FB?

The thing is that he didn't. He was all talk no action and that type is one who you just don't waste any time on, tbh. If you do, they're very superficial in your life and why are you going to fill your life with individuals like that? Quality over quantity, m'dear. As someone else pointed out at the time, it seemed as if he was poking around to see what he could and couldn't get away with- what he could get out of the situation. He was incredibly lazy and half assed with his attempts and WHY in the world would I even entertain someone like that? Why do you think he's entitled to my time based on his shitty attempts to see what he could glean from the situation?

Needless to say, he quickly disappeared because he thought it would be too hard for him to accomplish anything with me, lolz. I kept the convos short, flat, and unengaging once I realized he was just fucking around. He told me he felt that I would be too hard to please and that was the very last thing I heard from him haha.

There was no interest there. You're not a woman in dating so I don't expect you to get the cynicism in dating and relating when these familiar indicators pop up.

The article that DJ just posted about "this is how dating is now" probably summarizes this up pretty well, tbh.


I also have no idea what Facebook has to do with the post that you quoted, tbh.


Btw, this thread is a year old, dear. :p I was just posting an amusing update to the entire thing basically stating that I had been right in my gut instinct.

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by Ssupes

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Seriously.

It just gets old when you get approached by those who aren't doing it out of interest, but out of a personal need for something. People treat dating like a band aid. I'm nobody's band aid, tyvm.

Given the state that I live in, I pick up on that vibe so fast anymore though. I know my approach to this seems bitchy, but people here are that ridiculous. :/

What if he just really wants to hangout and chill with ya? Has he asked you "out" like a "date"?

I have peeps on my FB that I never talk to. Just peeps I knew in school. They now have husbands and kids. Just seeing others lives with no communication is cool. No need to say Hi or that kinda BS.

Does it hurt anything for them to see you on FB?

Can't answer for Rocky, but I cull the same way. I still ultimately have a cell phone for emergencies and I still like for my "friends" to be my actual friends or very good acquaintances.

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Agreed. It seems as if a lot of people just don't know how to be friends anymore- Just barely acquaintances and options who they keep around for self serving reasons.

When you become selective due to this trend, people question you and it's strange as fuck to me. It just further keeps this crap going. "LOL WHYYYY? WHY NOT TRY IT AND KEEP ANOTHER FLAKY FUCK IN YOUR LIFE?? WHAT'S IT GOING TO HURT??"

Dude people like that end up becoming toxic individuals and wastes of time. Bye Felicia.

Posted by Ssupes
cont.............

and decided to bounce.

Thanks M'lady 😉

Don't get me wrong, I'm not all anti wanting to get to know someone better. It's just how all of it panned out. It went from NOTHING (after nothing all through school) for almost 2 years to suddenly adding me back on social media and being really half assed and sporadic with his attempt at whatever he was doing.

It's like ...dahell? Go away. I don't have time for this crap you weirdo.

Posted by cheekyfaerie
Yup.

People accuse us Caps of keeping people around for selfish reasons. Kinda like you mentioned. Maybe some do, but I was never one of em. With few exceptions, my rule of thumb is that if I wouldn't help you move, I don't want you having even a glimpse into my personal business.

Nice Friday reference, btw.

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I've known of a few Caps who were notorious for keeping options around. But they were losers who had to rely on using people just so they could get through life, so yeah haha.

Posted by GetMisted
I think you've had a lot of hurt in your past that you still need to work through.

Nah, just a very low tolerance for bullshit. I don't feel like wasting any more time on guys who don't know what they want. We live in a society of man children and it's lame as fuck for dating.

But nice try honey.

Posted by 4ND5
shudv been more enthusiastic and asked an aries to go cart racing

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Haha right? Dude was boring the shit out of me tbh. He couldn't get a convo going to save his life and this was before I started to shut things down.

Glad it could be of help.

Gut instinct ftw.