The longest it's taken you to...

What's the longest (days/months/years) it's ever taken you to get over someone you were in a past relationship/friendship with? And what is their sign?

What's your opinion on why you think it took you so long to get over them?

I'm still trying to get over him and it's been over a year, I'm a libra and him a pisces, doesn't help that he still makes contact eve when I stopped but he was a really good friend and it was so easy to get along with him

Me: gemini
Him: gemini

We were together for three years. I moved a way and planned to be gone for two years. I was ready to ride it out, and do the long distance. He didn't do well with the distance at all. He ended up breaking up with me because he said five years down the road he couldn't see himself with me. He was sorry, I was a wreck.

He was my first love so it hurt like hell to hear that because at the time I couldn't see myself with anyone else. I couldn't eat for weeks. I was probably truly heart broken for 3-4 months. I would go out with friends and drink and I felt nothing but depressed. I tried to date other people and I just couldn't do it. He however, dated someone 3 weeks after we broke up, and five years later he is still with her. However, he did contact me a few months back and asked me out for coffee. I politely declined.

I think it took me so long because I didn't try to cover up or distract myself from how I was feeling. I just embraced what I was going through. I feel like people forget to do that sometimes.

Posted by krysrenee7
What's the longest (days/months/years) it's ever taken you to get over someone you were in a past relationship/friendship with? And what is their sign?

What's your opinion on why you think it took you so long to get over them?

I'll let u kno when I'm done :/ he was an Aries with an aqua moon.

Still trying to analyze why it's taking me so long. Probably bcuz right when I'm doing great and luvin life, he texts me. To be fair, I don't think he even knows I still care for him and I'm not telling, we're just friends now. I even created a list of the things abt him that turned me off...it's like I have to get really grossed out so I can move on.

I'm cool with it all - I just tend to get depressed abt it when I'm PMSing 😢

Four years....

It took me about three years to get past my divorce. Not all that time was one sided pining. There was a lot of back and forth. Hell, she even followed us 1000 miles across the country. Contact stays open because of kids and for a while that kept leading us down familiar roads. I tried dating other people in that time too but wasn't over her and it was all doomed before it started anyway. It's only been about six months now that I can really say I would (and have) say no if she wanted to move beyond conversation about the kids. No friends, no hanging out, finally over it.

Posted by LibraSid
It took me about three years to get past my divorce. Not all that time was one sided pining. There was a lot of back and forth. Hell, she even followed us 1000 miles across the country. Contact stays open because of kids and for a while that kept leading us down familiar roads. I tried dating other people in that time too but wasn't over her and it was all doomed before it started anyway. It's only been about six months now that I can really say I would (and have) say no if she wanted to move beyond conversation about the kids. No friends, no hanging out, finally over it.

I hear ya. Went down that same road w/my ex hub too. But I think we did so much back/forth the last 3 yrs of our marriage that by the time we separated and divorced I was pretty much done and over it. Tried doing the friend thing with him too but he would do the ol' reminiscing bit awww...ooohh....NAHHH. But it almost felt like he was trying to see if he still had it >:o

I'll be it really stings when you can truthfully say to them 'sorry, but the only thing we have left in common are the kids'.

Posted by peaceloveandhappiness

I hear ya. Went down that same road w/my ex hub too. But I think we did so much back/forth the last 3 yrs of our marriage that by the time we separated and divorced I was pretty much done and over it. Tried doing the friend thing with him too but he would do the ol' reminiscing bit awww...ooohh....NAHHH. But it almost felt like he was trying to see if he still had it >:o

I'll be it really stings when you can truthfully say to them 'sorry, but the only thing we have left in common are the kids'.

yep, just a few weeks ago mine asked if I wanted to come hang at her place saying she knew we'd have fun. I said she was right, it would be a lot of fun for a little while. Then it'd be back to the yelling and fighting and... no thank you. When the worst thing that could happen really would be to have a great time with someone, you know it's a bad idea.

Posted by LibraSid

Posted by peaceloveandhappiness

I hear ya. Went down that same road w/my ex hub too. But I think we did so much back/forth the last 3 yrs of our marriage that by the time we separated and divorced I was pretty much done and over it. Tried doing the friend thing with him too but he would do the ol' reminiscing bit awww...ooohh....NAHHH. But it almost felt like he was trying to see if he still had it >:o

I'll be it really stings when you can truthfully say to them 'sorry, but the only thing we have left in common are the kids'.

yep, just a few weeks ago mine asked if I wanted to come hang at her place saying she knew we'd have fun. I said she was right, it would be a lot of fun for a little while. Then it'd be back to the yelling and fighting and... no thank you. When the worst thing that could happen really would be to have a great time with someone, you know it's a bad idea.

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Mine finally found a steady gf and when he would start up, I would bring her up as much as I could. BUZZKILL. And I had to eventually cut off ties little by little. My kids are older now and they don't need to go through me anymore thank goodness....no need to talk to him anymore.

An associate of mine admitted yesterday that it took her 7 years to get over a 4 year relationship. I was shocked! ...Her admission was the inspiration behind me creating this post.

The longest it's ever taken me was 1 1/2 years. And that, I think, was b/c he was my 1st love. He was a Libra. Back then, some people were surprised that it took me so long, while others were surprised that it didn't take me a lot longer to move on.

Oh hell, how do you know for a fact that you've truly moved on anyways? Even if you never see/speak to them again & hate their guts, that doesn't guarantee that if they ever come back, alllllll those old feelings won't come back!

I feel that you'll know when you're truly over someone when 1. Enough time has gone past 2. You finally acknowledge that they weren't the one, thus you're glad things ended given that fact & 3. That person can come back months/years later & say/do ALL the GREAT things you used to love about them & yet you not bite the bait or even wanna bite, not even for 1 second!

Of course it's easy to say "UGH!" when an ex comes back & they show you the ugly side of them that made you wanna run far away in the 1st place. But if they come back & showcase all the things that originally made you fall in love, THAT is the true test of whether or not you're over them. And this especially goes out to all the people who tried to "change" their partner during the relationship. If even a little bit of you wants to fall for it or contemplates going back, you're not fully over them.

Just my opinion :-p

So true. I wonder if we really do miss that person or if it's the IDEA of having someone to love that loves you back? i.e. loneliness...

I've got emotionally over them long before the relationship ended: Libra and Pisces.

Took up to one year to get over my first boyfriend (Cap).

About 4 months to get over the latest (Aqua).

Life is too short for hangups and love is everywhere.

About 3/4 of a year to process everything and understand in my mind why we are better off apart.

My first is the one I never got over and never will 😢

Posted by Undine
I've got emotionally over them long before the relationship ended: Libra and Pisces.

It always sucks for the other person, but I think those who moved on emotionally long before the relationship actually ended tend to heal faster & never look back.

It seems that the worse or more toxic the relationship, the longer it takes people to move on from them. You'd think it'd be the opposite. You'd think people would hold on tighter to the relationships that were filled with nothing but love, monogamy, etc. Not all relationships end on a bad note or b/c of some hurtful event.

I thought those who had healthy relationships that ended for whatever reason (distance, boredom, loss of interest, etc.) would move on the slowest b/c of that "what if" factor. What if we just rekindled the flame? What if we just gave up too soon? What if we were just too immature to keep each other? Ya know, those kinda "what ifs."

But hey, sometimes what we think should happen or makes sense is the complete opposite.

I've seen more people want to hold on tighter to those who mistreated, disrespected & abused them moreso than those who treated the right most of the time. Ironic. I guess self-esteem & self-worth are a big factor in that

a few months. they were beautiful gemini's.