When to trust guys/men?

How to know when to trust a guy, when it's in a dating/sexual/romantic relationship? I withhold sex for a long time, but the guys change right after. The words that was said turns out to not be real and the good actions completely stop. It's a pattern o
starlordAugust 9, 2018 11:03am
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  • How to know when to trust a guy, when it's in a dating/sexual/romantic relationship?

    I withhold sex for a long time, but the guys change right after. The words that was said turns out to not be real and the good actions completely stop.
    It's a pattern on repeat and at loss on how to deal with it without ending up just cutting all guys off forever. I can't deal with the constant betrayel even on small scale.
    I try to talk about things and am open and honest myself, but no point to it when I am the only one being that and the other part is just bullbutterting.
  • Don't give trust for free and you'll never be disappointed. Instead, give it as a treat.

    🐺
  • Posted by i-xy
    Don't give trust for free and you'll never be disappointed. Instead, give it as a treat.

    🐺


    Good advice.
    ... it's hard then, not being able to trust people after months and months and not even after talking to them about important stuff that's supposed to build trust. It's hard not to let it and to keep being suspicious. Guess I'm just desperate for trusting a guy.
  • DeadInside
    they'll bend the knee
    DONT TRUST GEM AND SAG
  • MyStarsShine
    Venus ruled, Star gazing Scorpio with Moon in Taurus
    Never lol

    🌝
  • MyStarsShine
    Venus ruled, Star gazing Scorpio with Moon in Taurus
    My ex Virgo told me "never expect anything from anyone and then when you receive something, it's a bonus"

    Lol wise man.......wise hermit man

  • Posted by DeadInside
    DONT TRUST GEM AND SAG


    Funny, am surrounded by gems atm, and they are the ones, that make me feel good about myself. And have sag in me myself.

    I'd say don't trust guys, last two were gem and cap. But that's because they are guys. Or because they interact with me. I think I have no clue about how good guys are actually able to be, so when they're just being nice and playing me, I think they are being great!!! Low standards. Where they come from: no idea.
  • Auhh! That must be very hard.
    Are you sure you are not giving the wrong signals? Ofc sometimes after trying you realize that it’s not working and it has nothing to do with them being players, but if that happens to you as a pattern, maybe you are just attracted to the wrong guys. Where do you meet them?
  • I have to add that that has never happened to me. I think I am very good at reading signals and I can tell very well if a guy is just after sex.
  • Posted by DeadInside
    DONT TRUST GEM AND SAG


    User Submitted Image
  • Muderface
    female
    Posted by DeadInside
    DONT TRUST GEM AND SAG

    User Submitted Image
  • how long are you withholding in order to gain their trust? and how deep do your conversations go?

  • Lol so much negativity.
  • GemCurio
    Time To Be a Ghost...
    male
    Yes.. your standards are low.. But let's be honest here. So is everyone else's. So let's focus on you specifically because the world was here first and owes us nothing. If you are sick of things continuing in a direction you don't like (which is the same as men treating you in ways you don't like) change the direction. Set an ideal minimum for a guy worthy of a kiss that's higher than he has a job and looks at me in the eye whenever we talk in person.. Since when is he makes me laugh a standard higher than friendship or he looks nice??

    Stop settling for nice guys also... Do you have any idea how fake a nice guy/girl is?? They're not good they're not bad they're just nice... Nice is the biggest lie you could ever tell yourself. There's nothing real about it. Stop falling for it.

    Here's another punch in the teeth. If you never get the results you want in the choices you make, why would you trust yourself?? We were taught most things by emotionally compromised people just as stupid as we are. At some point, the smartest of us end up saying I can't trust myself either because I was educated by idiots.. My rationalizations towards people isn't working. So erase it from your mind. Set yourself standards of what members of the opposite sex should be instead of what they are, and wait patiently for someone who fits the description based on actions. Not words... It seems like most men and women are used car salesmen nowadays.. "It's only had 4 owners and it's still under a 100,000 miles" or "Doesn't it still have that new car smell to it". If men were held to the standards set for women most would be in the junk yard. SO... my point be the example of what you expect in a spouse/partner. If you can successfully manage this, most of the slimy people will go away because there's easier fish to catch in the see.. I need java.. Hopefully this helped...
  • Posted by starlord
    Posted by i-xy
    Don't give trust for free and you'll never be disappointed. Instead, give it as a treat.

    🐺


    Good advice.
    ... it's hard then, not being able to trust people after months and months and not even after talking to them about important stuff that's supposed to build trust. It's hard not to let it and to keep being suspicious. Guess I'm just desperate for trusting a guy.
    click to expand


    Yeah. It can drive you insane. Why give yourself and other person the impression that they have power over you.

    Have fun but always make your boundaries known and don't break it for anybody.
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