Bored w the Aries

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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
I dont want to be bored but I am. This is after being so obsessed and thinking about him 24/7. Maybe things are too routine for me now, too easy, and not as exciting and differnt as I fantasized them to be. Hes doing nothing wrong. Sex is a bit humdrum, but that could be synastry. Anyways, I dont get butterflies anymore. My scorp moon is just not being fed. Feels like causing drama. This is all a personal problem.

it could also be this uranus sq venus transit. This transit makes me want to shake things up dramatically.


Do you guys experience anything like this? How do you stick it out? How do you fight the boredom?
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FirstDecanTaurianWoman0428
@FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
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Wait I get the butterfly feelings and so does he with me no one esle. In my experience ia was good but over time when little lies or compatibility questions I would ask him didn't match so kinda went away..but still makes me nervous..

What happened too many lies? What types of guys do you attract? Fire with earth, another fire with mutable, fire with water, or fire with fire.. or are you changing into more feminine signs and less masculine?
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FirstDecanTaurianWoman0428
@FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
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Well as far as matching my Venus and MARS in Taurus with Aries, over time like some people mentioned. Idk if I can keep spontaneous all the time. I mean I can think of something fun to do with Aries without flirting. But I am so much sensual that it may go unnoticed and I am all about sensuality and sexual too. I just wait to get down with Aries. Because we both can just strip each other clothes off and be done with it.
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by beautifuldiaster
Spice it up.

Get out of your and his element. Try a new date idea perhaps?


Its rather early on to feel like this, that transit sucks! Think this is a sign of the end?
Umm we dont go on dates. We meet up at mutual events.

He doesn't seem to be the typical dating type.

Imo, this was a once passionate fwb but now im bored with the benefit part.
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
@ DMV- is this the same aries you have mentioned before on here? Why are you having a change of heart? Happened is ot too much balancing, too many female friends, too much of what exactly?
Yep, same guy.
No, none of those things. He doesn't lie, im not feeling threatened.

I guess i just need a certain level of drama or pasion to get my blood going.
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
Wait I get the butterfly feelings and so does he with me no one esle. In my experience ia was good but over time when little lies or compatibility questions I would ask him didn't match so kinda went away..but still makes me nervous..

What happened too many lies? What types of guys do you attract? Fire with earth, another fire with mutable, fire with water, or fire with fire.. or are you changing into more feminine signs and less masculine?
Ummm good questions. i could be comparing him to the Sag. Sag is very masculine. Aries is a tad more feminine.

Aries is a great catch, a venus in cappy dream. I guess ive been conditioned to take a harder road with men. The easy, well paved road isn't normal to me. So when its here, i kinda freak out a bit and create drama.




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DMV
@DMV
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Posted by Ssupes
Posted by DMV
Posted by beautifuldiaster
Spice it up.

Get out of your and his element. Try a new date idea perhaps?


Its rather early on to feel like this, that transit sucks! Think this is a sign of the end?
Umm we dont go on dates. We meet up at mutual events.

He doesn't seem to be the typical dating type.

Imo, this was a once passionate fwb but now im bored with the benefit part.
Are you wanting more than the "benefits" or just "better benefits"? LOL
click to expand

Better benefits
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
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Posted by DMV
I dont want to be bored but I am. This is after being so obsessed and thinking about him 24/7. Maybe things are too routine for me now, too easy, and not as exciting and differnt as I fantasized them to be. Hes doing nothing wrong. Sex is a bit humdrum, but that could be synastry. Anyways, I dont get butterflies anymore. My scorp moon is just not being fed. Feels like causing drama. This is all a personal problem.

it could also be this uranus sq venus transit. This transit makes me want to shake things up dramatically.


Do you guys experience anything like this? How do you stick it out? How do you fight the boredom?
Perhaps simply remind yourself of this. To some degree it sounds like you created expectations (aka fantasy) and it just isn't coming through. So what were you hoping the "benefits" would look like? Can you create that with him without drama?
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by DMV
I dont want to be bored but I am. This is after being so obsessed and thinking about him 24/7. Maybe things are too routine for me now, too easy, and not as exciting and differnt as I fantasized them to be. Hes doing nothing wrong. Sex is a bit humdrum, but that could be synastry. Anyways, I dont get butterflies anymore. My scorp moon is just not being fed. Feels like causing drama. This is all a personal problem.

it could also be this uranus sq venus transit. This transit makes me want to shake things up dramatically.


Do you guys experience anything like this? How do you stick it out? How do you fight the boredom?
Perhaps simply remind yourself of this. To some degree it sounds like you created expectations (aka fantasy) and it just isn't coming through. So what were you hoping the "benefits" would look like? Can you create that with him without drama?
click to expand

Id like some better, more passionate, thrown aganist the wall sex. When we were having our bout of miscommunication, that sex was AWEsome! Now that were on the same page, its kinda lost a bit of thrill.
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PhoenixRising
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Comments: 19 · Posts: 19733 · Topics: 48
Well I'm understanding "benefits" to mean the sexual component of their relationship. So how can she enhance the sexual relationship without the need for creating "drama" (e.g. unnecessary tension, conflict in an effort to get a response), especially if the lag in this area is due to her fantasies not being met vs something he is actually doing wrong. Basically, how can the gap between fantasy and reality be closed? Does he even know he isn't meeting this need?

Now, if the fantasy is about something else all together (more than sexual) then we're talking about something different entirely.
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DMV
@DMV
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Posted by Weeds
there isnt anything wrong with drama as long as it is contained. the issue is since your classifying it close to fwb. then their isnt a solid foundation to create a contained chaotic experience in order to form sparks that will keep you happy. I dont think you can find a suitable substitute that is going to keep you interested.
So im damned. I sure cant play the same cards ive already played lol. That would make me crazy. Not the progressive type of crazy.
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Weeds
@Weeds
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Posted by beautifuldiaster
Posted by DMV
I'd like to break this cycle that I have. I do this every time. Pursue, get bored, leave. Rinse n repeat.
Be drastic. And yes, by drastic I mean go crazy in an unprogressive type way. 😱 mwahahaa.

Just a fwb, what's the harm? You're bored as it is, nothing to lose.

Here's what I have in mind....
Suggest a date out. Get a few in you and slap him, hard! Then devour him, and when he gets into it, bite his lip and slap him again.

Thats sure to bring fire out hahaha.
click to expand

0_0

thats crazy enough to work
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by beautifuldiaster
Posted by DMV
I'd like to break this cycle that I have. I do this every time. Pursue, get bored, leave. Rinse n repeat.
Be drastic. And yes, by drastic I mean go crazy in an unprogressive type way. 😱 mwahahaa.

Just a fwb, what's the harm? You're bored as it is, nothing to lose.

Here's what I have in mind....
Suggest a date out. Get a few in you and slap him, hard! Then devour him, and when he gets into it, bite his lip and slap him again.

Thats sure to bring fire out hahaha.

Or be reasonable and carry on, wash, rinse repeat.



When I'm in your situation, it's for a couple reasons.

1. I need to occupy my time better, make myself busy
2. I like someone a lot and need more in return
3. I've become complacent

I dunno DMV. Let us know what happens.
click to expand

yeah maybe a meet up at a bar b4 nookie.
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beautifulsoul74
@beautifulsoul74
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Posted by DMV
I'd like to break this cycle that I have. I do this every time. Pursue, get bored, leave. Rinse n repeat.
DMV, you already know the answer. At some point you're going ti actually face your options because eventually you will reach the bottom of the "better benefits" where there's simply no one left to iffer you better benefits as you describe them. From what I surmise...your going to actually have to try and have a real fruitful relationship with actual depth to sustain you. Can't keep running Love.
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
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Comments: 19 · Posts: 19733 · Topics: 48
Posted by DMV
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by DMV
I dont want to be bored but I am. This is after being so obsessed and thinking about him 24/7. Maybe things are too routine for me now, too easy, and not as exciting and differnt as I fantasized them to be. Hes doing nothing wrong. Sex is a bit humdrum, but that could be synastry. Anyways, I dont get butterflies anymore. My scorp moon is just not being fed. Feels like causing drama. This is all a personal problem.

it could also be this uranus sq venus transit. This transit makes me want to shake things up dramatically.


Do you guys experience anything like this? How do you stick it out? How do you fight the boredom?
Perhaps simply remind yourself of this. To some degree it sounds like you created expectations (aka fantasy) and it just isn't coming through. So what were you hoping the "benefits" would look like? Can you create that with him without drama?
Id like some better, more passionate, thrown aganist the wall sex. When we were having our bout of miscommunication, that sex was AWEsome! Now that were on the same page, its kinda lost a bit of thrill.
click to expand

Hmph. Do you mind being aggressive in the bedroom? I need a good balance of dominating and being dominated, but I'm not into verbalizing that. When I've been with ho-hum partners I just up the aggression factor. If you're not into verbalizing get a lot more physical with him. Push him up against a wall, force him down on his knees, put you leg over his shoulder. No words required. At least I hope not. Be forceful when he begins to eat your kitty. Tell him to stare up at you while he pleases you. You're in command.

When he begins to acts more aggressive, fall back a little hopefully he's paying attention to how your body is responding and gets that he need to up the aggression factor to get your juices going.
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DMV
@DMV
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Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by DMV
I'd like to break this cycle that I have. I do this every time. Pursue, get bored, leave. Rinse n repeat.
DMV, you already know the answer. At some point you're going ti actually face your options because eventually you will reach the bottom of the "better benefits" where there's simply no one left to iffer you better benefits as you describe them. From what I surmise...your going to actually have to try and have a real fruitful relationship with actual depth to sustain you. Can't keep running Love.
click to expand

How'd you know that I was lacing up my sneakers? Ssssssh.
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
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Comments: 19 · Posts: 19733 · Topics: 48
Posted by beautifuldiaster
Posted by DMV
I'd like to break this cycle that I have. I do this every time. Pursue, get bored, leave. Rinse n repeat.
Be drastic. And yes, by drastic I mean go crazy in an unprogressive type way. 😱 mwahahaa.

Just a fwb, what's the harm? You're bored as it is, nothing to lose.

Here's what I have in mind....
Suggest a date out. Get a few in you and slap him, hard! Then devour him, and when he gets into it, bite his lip and slap him again.

Thats sure to bring fire out hahaha.
click to expand

I think I misunderstood what you meant by drama. Sorry. You're all talking about fiyah. Very different animal, which I dig. Unnecessary drama---how I was defining it, repels me, so I'm not here for it. What BD suggested sounds like a good way to take the lead and spice it up though.
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
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Posted by DMV
Dont u guys think that by me initiating, I will start to assume the male role? Cause once I start, I dont stop.
Find the balance. That's why I suggested you fall back once he bites and begins to take the lead.

I never really got the whole role restriction thing. It's about two people figuring out their like/interest and sexual needs. I think very few people experience the type of sexual chemistry that doesn't require some effort, trust and some form of communication. If you're afraid of taking the lead even a little bit you're going to continue to be disappointed. At least with this Ram.

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PhoenixRising
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Posted by DMV
@phoenix,

I will slap a man in the bedroom but thats the extent of my dominating nature. My sex life is purely servitude.
That's fine. The only option is communicating your needs then. As I asked, does he even know he's disappointing you? You desire him to be one way and he may be thinking it's all good. So close the gap.

One thing I found interesting though is you stated you're concerned about assuming the male role, yet you identified your cycle as "pursue, get bored and leave".

Maybe stop being with men you have to pursue. That's already setting the stage for what's to come. No? Cycle broken.
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beautifulsoul74
@beautifulsoul74
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Comments: 122 · Posts: 5590 · Topics: 41
Posted by DMV
Posted by beautifulsoul74
Posted by DMV
I'd like to break this cycle that I have. I do this every time. Pursue, get bored, leave. Rinse n repeat.
DMV, you already know the answer. At some point you're going ti actually face your options because eventually you will reach the bottom of the "better benefits" where there's simply no one left to iffer you better benefits as you describe them. From what I surmise...your going to actually have to try and have a real fruitful relationship with actual depth to sustain you. Can't keep running Love.
How'd you know that I was lacing up my sneakers? Ssssssh.
click to expand

I'm a damn Sag...I know my own 😛. But mind the word.
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by DMV
@phoenix,

I will slap a man in the bedroom but thats the extent of my dominating nature. My sex life is purely servitude.
That's fine. The only option is communicating your needs then. As I asked, does he even know he's disappointing you? You desire him to be one way and he may be thinking it's all good. So close the gap.

One thing I found interesting though is you stated you're concerned about assuming the male role, yet you identified your cycle as "pursue, get bored and leave".

Maybe stop being with men you have to pursue. That's already setting the stage for what's to come. No? Cycle broken.
click to expand

Pursue as in reciprocate interest
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by beautifuldiaster
Posted by DMV
I'd like to break this cycle that I have. I do this every time. Pursue, get bored, leave. Rinse n repeat.
Be drastic. And yes, by drastic I mean go crazy in an unprogressive type way. 😱 mwahahaa.

Just a fwb, what's the harm? You're bored as it is, nothing to lose.

Here's what I have in mind....
Suggest a date out. Get a few in you and slap him, hard! Then devour him, and when he gets into it, bite his lip and slap him again.

Thats sure to bring fire out hahaha.

I think I misunderstood what you meant by drama. Sorry. You're all talking about fiyah. Very different animal, which I dig. Unnecessary drama---how I was defining it, repels me, so I'm not here for it. What BD suggested sounds like a good way to take the lead and spice it up though.
click to expand

no you didnt. I definitely meant more emotional drama. Physical drama, besides slapping, I s not my forte.
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by DMV
@phoenix,

I will slap a man in the bedroom but thats the extent of my dominating nature. My sex life is purely servitude.
That's fine. The only option is communicating your needs then. As I asked, does he even know he's disappointing you? You desire him to be one way and he may be thinking it's all good. So close the gap.

One thing I found interesting though is you stated you're concerned about assuming the male role, yet you identified your cycle as "pursue, get bored and leave".

Maybe stop being with men you have to pursue. That's already setting the stage for what's to come. No? Cycle broken.
click to expand

I will communicate my needs by showing him porn that I like. He does the same to me.
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by busyeyes88
Posted by DMV
Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
@ DMV- is this the same aries you have mentioned before on here? Why are you having a change of heart? Happened is ot too much balancing, too many female friends, too much of what exactly?
Yep, same guy.
No, none of those things. He doesn't lie, im not feeling threatened.

I guess i just need a certain level of drama or pasion to get my blood going.
I can relate to this feeling.. I too need passion of some kind to get and keep my blood going.. If not, boredom sets in and once passion has gone, nothing can reignite it!! It's especially hard work when it's left to the one person to bring in the passion and not both parties. It's sad really because for me once the passion has gone.. I'm gone and unfortunately I get bored of people real quick!!!
click to expand

I think Impulsive had a thread about passion vs safe. I totally didnt get where she was coming from. Now I do.
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
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Comments: 19 · Posts: 19733 · Topics: 48
Posted by DMV
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by DMV
@phoenix,

I will slap a man in the bedroom but thats the extent of my dominating nature. My sex life is purely servitude.
That's fine. The only option is communicating your needs then. As I asked, does he even know he's disappointing you? You desire him to be one way and he may be thinking it's all good. So close the gap.

One thing I found interesting though is you stated you're concerned about assuming the male role, yet you identified your cycle as "pursue, get bored and leave".

Maybe stop being with men you have to pursue. That's already setting the stage for what's to come. No? Cycle broken.
Pursue as in reciprocate interest
click to expand

Ah. Noted.
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by Twodrinkminimum
DMV, you're going to have to give him something to work with. Throwing out some bait is not taking on the masculine role.

Just plant some seeds in his head every now and then. Coyly. I know you already do it anyway. When you wore that white bikini, you knew what you were doing 😉 lol. I think the porn thing was a good idea, except just send him a porn gif. I don't know what it is, but porn gifs are 10x sexier than porn. Faster and more efficient. Send it to him earlier in the day or when you know he's going to be busy so all he can do is think about it until he sees you.

Image Not Found

I just posted a link so no one gets fired while browsing dxp lol...but example send something like that and ask him "Have you ever done it like this in the kitchen?" ...I hope he's not stupid enough to say yes. but it doesn't have to be aggressive like you're thinking "I want you to do this to me" ...you're being facetious with him and playful.

90% of the time I'm not aggressive but I get them so worked up by playing innocent that it drives them crazy. Men and women both like to fantasize. Like I personally hate dick pix. It's just like in your face...okay, yep, that's a dick. But a pic of an outline of his dick in sweat pants...game over. Bc now my mind is reeling. Be subtle and alluring. You mentioned fishnets one time I think? I remembered because I have lace printed stockings and I love them and so do men...every single time I wear them. They're not revealing at all but they're semi indecent. Men love stockings. I dare anyone to find a man that doesn't. Wear them and find a way to subtley sneak them into a picture to send them. Not like "look at me" unless you want to but make him wonder "What is she wearing...bc that's sexy as fuck"

Essentially...just tease the hell out of him until he devours you instead of you devouring him.
subtlety yessssss. Good call with the mems.
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
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Comments: 19 · Posts: 19733 · Topics: 48
d would implement an edit button I'd be happy.

Anyway,
Posted by DMV
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by beautifuldiaster
Posted by DMV
I'd like to break this cycle that I have. I do this every time. Pursue, get bored, leave. Rinse n repeat.
Be drastic. And yes, by drastic I mean go crazy in an unprogressive type way. 😱 mwahahaa.

Just a fwb, what's the harm? You're bored as it is, nothing to lose.

Here's what I have in mind....
Suggest a date out. Get a few in you and slap him, hard! Then devour him, and when he gets into it, bite his lip and slap him again.

Thats sure to bring fire out hahaha.

I think I misunderstood what you meant by drama. Sorry. You're all talking about fiyah. Very different animal, which I dig. Unnecessary drama---how I was defining it, repels me, so I'm not here for it. What BD suggested sounds like a good way to take the lead and spice it up though.
no you didnt. I definitely meant more emotional drama. Physical drama, besides slapping, I s not my forte.
click to expand

Yeah, skip the emotional drama it's not necessary given the nature of you're relationship. Basically you want to jump from expecting something more sexually intense with fwb and rather than communicate that (or initiate the intensity so he's on the same page---he doesn't live in your head after all) you're looking to spark a reaction by creating drama. Good way to end things. However that all depends on your target. He may thrive off of drama. If I get even a hint of it I'm gone.

beautifulsoul may be speaking to what you truly desire here.
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by Twodrinkminimum
I get where DMV is coming from. If I have to explicitly state exactly what I want, I don't want it anymore? Then I feel like they're doing it out of obligation and not because it's what they really want to do. It's an act now and not spontaneous and exciting. I know this can't apply to everything but for me it definitely applies to the way I want to be sexed. There needs to be a little bit of a primal and animalistic approach to it. Not rehearsed and robotic because I told you to do it like that.
This is how I feel. Yes.

whereas him telling me what he likes is a mars in virgos wet dream.
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by beautifuldiaster
Posted by DMV
Posted by Twodrinkminimum
I get where DMV is coming from. If I have to explicitly state exactly what I want, I don't want it anymore? Then I feel like they're doing it out of obligation and not because it's what they really want to do. It's an act now and not spontaneous and exciting. I know this can't apply to everything but for me it definitely applies to the way I want to be sexed. There needs to be a little bit of a primal and animalistic approach to it. Not rehearsed and robotic because I told you to do it like that.
This is how I feel. Yes.

whereas him telling me what he likes is a mars in virgos wet dream.
Thats why I said spark it up.

Make him talk. Make him force out his wants. Make him tell you exactly how he wants it and how hard so you can ride him out.


I'm the opposite, I'd rather be the director. But it only shows after some foreplay... aka rough housing or seducing.
click to expand

Oh he talks. Hes very satisfied. Ive made changes to how he wants it instantly. Whereas im less likely to speak up. The guy has to learn me. Anticipate my needs.

Aries is a horse in chinese. Sag is a tiger. Tiger's study you, the horse is having a hard time.
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DMV
@DMV
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Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by Twodrinkminimum
Posted by DMV
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by DMV
I guess I just like a certain level of mind screwing....
That Moon is strong huh? Sounds like something my Mars would enjoy.
sag sun cancer moon mars scorpio was perfect in walking that tight rope. 6 years later, the sex is still truly the bomb.
DMV do Cancer moons like mind games? I'm dealing with one right now. Cancer moon is almost more cancer-y than cancer sun.
click to expand

yes. But their kinda consistent in their emotional manipulation. Mars in scorp is very demanding. Do this, do that. cancer moon will play with you. They relive everything looking for holes and they get insecure. Theyll blow u off days at a time, then bombard you with 15 callings a row. Then they meet up with you with small tokens of your favorite things. Then you realize that you never told them your favorite things. Then they start talking about the past to draw you in, its foreplay to them. Then you melt. Then you must reciprocate!!

rinse, repeat
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