sagg best friend seriosly mad!

I'm an aries and she's a sagg, we both moved to this small town because our families are military and sorta became best friends (here) even though we are completely different (I'm outdoorsy while she is fashion-loving) but we both love basketball and can laugh a lot together. Also, she's black and I'm white.

So we met a while ago, like a half a year, and it took us a while, but we started being really great friends like two months ago. We've never had a single fight.

Then yesterday, well, we had a racial issue. What I said was really dumb and all, but I didn't think she would take it so personally considering we make fun of my extreme whiteness alllll the time (I go bright red about everything, I'm more uncoordinated at basketball, I listen to "white-person" music, etc, etc) And I make sort-of jokes about her race too, but they were always self-deprecating (a running joke was how cool I felt in her car listening to "black person" music.)

We were in class and she moved away from her usual seat next to me, to the back corner next to some brown cupboards so the teacher wouldn't see her sleeping. Someone asked, "Why is she sitting back there?" and I said, "It's so she can blend in and the teacher won't see her sleeping." Everyone laughed, but her. And she hasn't talked to me since.

She rected very coldly and said "That's really racist." I tried to say sorry but she just ignored me and class started, she ignored me the rest of the day, and didn't pick me up for basketball practice that night, so I had to walk, and then she didn't pick me up for school this morning (making me tardy so I had detention.)

She is completely ignoring me! And I don't know what I am supposed to do about it. I tried to say sorry, but she is taking it so seriously! As if we were never friends or something... I'm worried I ruined our friendship which makes me extremely sad because she is like my only real friend at this school. I say stupid things alll the time, I thought she knew that... I don't know what to do to make her not hate me anymore. Or if things can ever be the same again...

Do you know her placements? This doesn't sound like something a sag would do so maybe her moon is in cancer?

She needs to lighten up btw cus honestly I found that funny. xD People make jokes about me being mexican or christian and I just laugh it off because whats it gonna hurt me? Definitely strange for a sagi. We're usually the ones offending lol

I think it was because you said it in front of other people that got her upset. She felt ridiculed. Between the two of you, it didn't bother her because it was private. Also its not her job to get you to practice and to school. You should show more respect for a good friend like she was. Call and apologize.

It's because my house is on the corner right down the street from the school, she passes it anyways, so all she has to do is stop and I get it in. And she's been doing it all year, so it's really not that rude for me to at least expect a warning that she is going to stop doing it.

Her phone isn't working right now, so I can't call or text her. Should I send her a message on facebook apologizing? I can't get her to talk to me at school or practice... She just acts like I don't exist anymore 😢

I know, it's really really weird for her to be acting this way. She never does.

Oh and I looked up her other placings:

Sun Sagittarius
Moon Leo
Mercury Sagittarius
Venus Aquarius
Mars Cancer

wow, The Sag I'm dating has moon in leo, mercury in sag and venus in aqua too.. its weird, because it just doesnt seem like a Sag thing to do - have never offended his ethnicity/race tho, but we joke around about eachother all the time, and he doesnt care

i dont think this is not a question of astrology.

there are some things white people can say to black people at certain times and there are some things that you cant.

by the way, the shit was funny as hell!

Posted by TheLadySagittarius
I think it was because you said it in front of other people that got her upset. She felt ridiculed. Between the two of you, it didn't bother her because it was private. Also its not her job to get you to practice and to school. You should show more respect for a good friend like she was. Call and apologize.

yup this is what i was thinking 2

Well we've talked a lot before, we were both bullied growing up. She used to make jokes about how kids would make fun of her for being black, and we'd laugh about it now because it was pretty funny.

She'd always laugh cuz all they'd be able to say is "Oh, ***'s black!" and apparently it was really dumb.

So she might be sensitive about the racial thing, but I just thought nowadays she thought it was all funny, but that's judgmental considering I'm white and I dunno what it was like... I guess...

SO I sent her a mssg on fb apologizing. Getting ready for another awkward basketball practice (usually she's accidentally hitting me in the head with the ball and were both laying on the floor laughing before warm-ups... not lately though.) She's also been frustrated because recently our couch took us out of the starting five and basically benched us, the couch especially acts like she doesn't exist, and in this town it's like the only thing we have, so she's been extra irritable (and so have I...)

Ah...leo moon. I dated a leo who got very hurt when I offended him...especially in public. No wonder shes not talking to you. You need to appologize and beg. Leos need petting

I dated a leo for over a year and learned to swallow my pride because it was either I apologize for the hurt I did to him or he'd be butt hurt for the rest of the week

I am only responding because this was one of the posts seen
when logging into the board.

TheLadySagittarius is correct with this:
"I think it was because you said it in front of other people ... "


I believe you REMOVED the race issues by making light of them, but ...

you usually did it alone - or in front of people WHO KNEW you were best friends
and that those things would be said with affection.


But she was also pissed because not only did you poke fun at the OBVIOUS
visible race issue ....

... but because you mentioned the SLEEPING part, you made her seem like
a "lazy nigger, not interested in education" to the other white folk ...

... AND HER, TOO."

Apologize, admitting that you realize that WHILE YOU ATTEMPT TO REMOVE
racial issues by poiking fun at them to break tension, you did not
realize that they were usually done without an audience of people who
DON'T KNOW FOR SURE that it was said with great AFFECTION....and ...

"
... that another person mentioned how mentioning the black girl who
was going to sleep through class may have struck a nerve by pointing
out a racial stereotype... but more likely you were mad because
I made you look lazy in front of everybody, which I feel bad about most,
because ..you gotta admit ... the camoflage issue WAS funny at hell,
but I wont make jokes like that again for sure because I feel really bad.
that it HURT you somehow. "


... she'll eventually admit that it was THE LAZINESS part that bugged her most.

Yeah I was gna say something about the laziness too. I don't really like people to point out when I'm doing something bad or a weakness of mine. :3

Posted by DMV

Posted by TheLadySagittarius
I think it was because you said it in front of other people that got her upset. She felt ridiculed. Between the two of you, it didn't bother her because it was private. Also its not her job to get you to practice and to school. You should show more respect for a good friend like she was. Call and apologize.

yup this is what i was thinking 2

click to expand

You're both right.
& it's the Leo moon.

I have the same placements (besides the Venus and Mars, which have little to do with this.)
You are supposed to be her friend and you made a stupid joke, which normally would not have bothered her, but you said it in front of other people - who laughed at her with you. She might have been feeling insecure at that moment, but regardless, you embarrassed her.

My black friend makes fun of me when I act really "white" and I make fun of him when he acts really "black" or ghetto. 😛 Lol

It's fine. We ♥ each other and we both know neither of us are prejudiced/racist/whatever.


But if he were to make fun of me being "white" in front of a bunch of his black friends and they were laughing at me...I would feel like :/ wow, it's a bad thing to be white or something? Ok cool, don't be my friend then if I'm too white.

*shrugs*

It's the fact that other people, who are not my friends, and we're not cool like that are laughing about something that can be a very sensitive subject like race.

Posted by THEKingofLibra

Posted by MzSagittarius
DARN YOU DMV...You TOOK THE WORDS OUT OF MY MOUTH...But I wanna reiterate it soo..

This has nothing to do with astrology...There are some thing you just can't say to black peoples.... I have boundaries established with my "white" buddies...We can joke and laugh about each other...But enough is enough...There are limits...But hey, I act pretty white though...So I don't mind...

You must be stuttering, because she had those words 2 hours ago in her mouth 😛




occupied by my cock now

click to expand

i certainly did have something in my mouth yeseterday. i think i gave the best performance of my life yesterday. My sag guy (FWB)is awesome. we had the best screw. it wasnt even sex, it was straight up screwing.

people say that i act like a white girl but i think i just act like DMV. i does make me cringe when people bring it up, especially in public.

Posted by DMV
people say that i act like a white girl but i think i just act like DMV. i does make me cringe when people bring it up, especially in public.

Exactly, it's just tacky to point out someone is different from everyone else in the room.
If they weren't already feeling slightly out of place, they certainly are now......


& aren't you slightly offended that people think you don't act "black" enough, or act too "white?"

Posted by DMV

Posted by THEKingofLibra

Posted by MzSagittarius
DARN YOU DMV...You TOOK THE WORDS OUT OF MY MOUTH...But I wanna reiterate it soo..

This has nothing to do with astrology...There are some thing you just can't say to black peoples.... I have boundaries established with my "white" buddies...We can joke and laugh about each other...But enough is enough...There are limits...But hey, I act pretty white though...So I don't mind...

You must be stuttering, because she had those words 2 hours ago in her mouth 😛


occupied by my cock now

i certainly did have something in my mouth yeseterday. i think i gave the best performance of my life yesterday. My sag guy (FWB)is awesome. we had the best screw. it wasnt even sex, it was straight up screwing.

click to expand

@DMV Lol!

Posted by brianafay

Posted by DMV
people say that i act like a white girl but i think i just act like DMV. i does make me cringe when people bring it up, especially in public.

Exactly, it's just tacky to point out someone is different from everyone else in the room.
If they weren't already feeling slightly out of place, they certainly are now......


& aren't you slightly offended that people think you don't act "black" enough, or act too "white?"

click to expand

slightly offended is putting it mildly. i get very offended. who gives a shyt. i am what i am.

Yeah it annoys me too. Like please tell me how I should act then.....haha

Well it's not as bad as you are making it out to be. Like I said, we go to a small school, and aside from our other two good friends who were in the class, there were only three "outsiders" (kids who are friends, but we never hang out out side of school).

It's not like I made a joke out of her in front of thirty kids she doesn't know.

I know it was immature, but, I dunno, it seems stupid that something like this is going to end our relationship. It seems equally racist on her part to end our relationship over me being supposedly "racist" when she knows I'm not like that at all. I dunno. It's just dumb.

I don't thing she is going to forgive me, but I guess I'll have to chop it up to experience. I have had several other ethnic friends and race has never been an issue with any of them.

Posted by AiryBri
Well it's not as bad as you are making it out to be. Like I said, we go to a small school, and aside from our other two good friends who were in the class, there were only three "outsiders" (kids who are friends, but we never hang out out side of school).

It's not like I made a joke out of her in front of thirty kids she doesn't know.

I know it was immature, but, I dunno, it seems stupid that something like this is going to end our relationship. It seems equally racist on her part to end our relationship over me being supposedly "racist" when she knows I'm not like that at all. I dunno. It's just dumb.

I don't thing she is going to forgive me, but I guess I'll have to chop it up to experience. I have had several other ethnic friends and race has never been an issue with any of them.

It really doesn't matter if it was in front of 3 people or thirty. The point is, she was the only black one there...you made a stupid joke about her skin color in front of several other white people, with whom she is not friends, who laughed with you.

If you really can't see it, that's exactly why she's mad.

Think about if the roles were reversed and she made a joke about how white you were in front of several black people, also whom you're not cool with like that, and they were laughing at you... you'd feel a little annoyed? Understatement?


I'm not trying to be a dick, but you need to stop acting like a child if you don't want to lose your friend.
You know what you did. Rather you think it was a big deal or not, it may have hurt her feelings or made her feel betrayed by you. Just suck it up and apologize. The end.

Posted by brianafay
Yeah it annoys me too. Like please tell me how I should act then.....haha

exactly. i think its a matter of people living in one area for their entire life with the same "type" of people. no real clue of what the real world has to offer. different and unique people.

Posted by bassace
i think it may be the public thing. sags are allll about different races and cultures and stuff like that, and also very offensive, so racial/religious/gender/whatever jokes are not uncommon. she prob felt like you stabbed her in the back by doing it in public. the things that offend us are quite odd, youll be joking about some pretty sensitive stuff then boom! you touch a subject that were sensitive about. this is very weird, maybe something in the tone of your voice made her mad? maybe she thought you were trying to impress someone with your humor? if she thinks you were trying to play a subtle game with her by making fun of her in front of someone you like (?), she may be mad because you tried to get points with someone at her expense. we dont like being used AT ALL, we also dont like other people trying to step on us. so maybe it was the way you said it. if this is the case, you KNOW what you did and have to apologize for it. she might also get pissed if you were joking about it with someone else. its one thing to tell a joke, but its another thing to joke about her with someone else. there must be some underlying details that you forgot to mention. for all our brashness, were very keen to subtlety

o.o yeah there are some pretty strange things that offend me. Not much offends me, but when it does I'll either attack or leave and sulk :3

My friend had every right to be mad at me and I wasn't trying to make excuses. What annoyed me was a poster saying I should DIE over a stupid joke.

Anyways, my friend did come around 🙂 I'm really happy, we've dropped it and are acting like nothing happened!

I'm really really happy, I value her friendship a lot.

Posted by AiryBri
My friend had every right to be mad at me and I wasn't trying to make excuses. What annoyed me was a poster saying I should DIE over a stupid joke.

Anyways, my friend did come around 🙂 I'm really happy, we've dropped it and are acting like nothing happened!

I'm really really happy, I value her friendship a lot.

yay 🙂

Posted by MzSagittarius
Hey, you can be like me and not have friends...Its pretty fun...Like seriously...I have NO problems...But Jupiter is transiting through my eleventh house now...SHALL THAT BRING FRIENDS, We'll see.... O_o

Hahaha come to think of it I don't really have many friends at the moment either.

she probably thinks you are racist and wants nothing more to do with you. I dont want anyone making any racial jokes because they are not fucking funny. I will just move on and maybe you should stick with folks your own race until you learn how to act around black people. You are lucky you didnt get punch in the mouth.

Posted by dward417
she probably thinks you are racist and wants nothing more to do with you. I dont want anyone making any racial jokes because they are not fucking funny. I will just move on and maybe you should stick with folks your own race until you learn how to act around black people. You are lucky you didnt get punch in the mouth.

you're dumb. 🙂 sorry, it's true.

If they make racial jokes back and forth with each other all the time, it does not make her racist since she made the joke this time.

Like I said previously, my friend makes fun of me when I "act white" and I make fun of him when he "acts black." It's in a loving and airy way...he knows I'm not racist, and I know there's not a racist bone in his body either.


Please pull your head out of your ass with that "learn how to act around black people" bullshit. You're a living example of why we can't get past this mess.



*shakes head*
rant over.

Ok, I shouldn't have called you dumb. I'm sorry.


Ignorant was more the word I was looking for.

I'm guessing you probably have no white friends? Fine with me, just wondering?

call me what you want....I still hate racist jokes so there so what I think shouldnt really matter to you.....I have plenty of white friends...love them to death... they never make any racial comments because it just something you dont do.


So take your head out of your Ass and kiss mine

Haha 😄

Whatever. Still, you probably should have read the rest of the thread before you posted what you did

I don't know about the whole racist thing, Who knows whats okay and what isn't to say.

But maybe thats a line you shouldn't cross with her and I mean just in the boundaries sense.


Like we all need those in any kind of relationship.



With the leo moon thing I have one of those and I can get seriously offend by things and be over the top about it. (Fire ya know?) but than usually the fire goes out and other times it keeps burning it really depends.


Who knows with this.

Oh and remember this may not have anything to do with you either. So much of the time we think it's all about us but lot of the time it couldn't be further from the truth.

Posted by dward417
she probably thinks you are racist and wants nothing more to do with you. I dont want anyone making any racial jokes because they are not fucking funny. I will just move on and maybe you should stick with folks your own race until you learn how to act around black people. You are lucky you didnt get punch in the mouth.

This is just a racist as any joke.

Why is it that a racist joke against black people constitutes the jokee being punched or even dying, but it's fine and dandy the other way around?

And WTF, you are you suggesting I "stick to people my own race" that's so beyond racist I can't even speak.

I need to leave this thread before I get seriously ticked.

"The fate of black people from 1933 to 1945 in Nazi Germany and in German-occupied territories ranged from isolation to persecution, sterilization, medical experimentation, incarceration, brutality, and murder. However, there was no systematic program for their elimination as there was for Jews and other groups." (from http://www.ushmm.org/wlc/en/article.php?ModuleId=10005479)<BR>

Yes, people focus primarily on the Jewish when one says "Hitler" or "Nazi" or "Holocaust".. Nazis killed some 5-6 million Jews (mostly in concentration camps).. however, they also killed nearly that many non-Jews in various labor camps and "ghettos" and raids.. they had a blast with "undesirables" of many races, creeds, and "afflictions" (ie.. homosexuals, disabled/mentally ill, Freemasons, Jehovah's Witnesses, etc) .. including the Polish (and other Slavic), whom they invaded. A LOT more than just Jews lost their lives to Hitler's Nazi regime. TWICE as many Slavs (Czech, Polish, Ukrainian, etc) as Jews, in fact. Hitler was kind of an equal-opportunity hater.

Just as an estimation (because all anyone can do is estimate..)
From: http://clipmarks.com/clipmark/39B02CC9-E06D-4547-A46F-E552C1662895/<BR> "These genocides cost the lives of probably 16,315,000 people. Most likely the Nazis wiped out 5,291,000 Jews, 258,000 Gypsies, 10,547,000 Slavs, and 220,000 homosexuals. They also "euthanized" 173,500 handicapped Germans. Then in repression, terrorism, reprisals, and other cold-blooded killings done to impose and maintain their rule throughout Europe, the Nazis murdered more millions including French, Dutch, Serbs, Slovenes, Czechs, and others. In total, they likely annihilated 20,946,000 human beings."

Lol @ there were no blacks in Germany. Who is this girl? she's a fucking genius