after they say ILY

do u find yourself to go a bit emotionally stir crazy and basically exhibit irrational behavior (i.e. ignoring the other person) after someone tells u ILY or that they have feelings for you?

it would depend on when they said it and the circumstances they said it in!!!

more detail is needed.

for example, i would avoid anyone if they said that within 10 minutes of knowing them but when my ex husband first told me he loved me, we were both on the same page and it was a lovely moment.

if you want to avoid or ignore....you don't feel the same and you should spit it out.

i duno, i just cant handle it. i wish people would just keep their mouths closed.

Posted by ellessque

Posted by DMV
do u find yourself to go a bit emotionally stir crazy and basically exhibit irrational behavior (i.e. ignoring the other person) after someone tells u ILY or that they have feelings for you?

yes.

but that could be because I'm hypersensitive to that and i don't like discussing it and then I immediately go on defense mode seeing if words meet up with actions. if actions meet words and the other person stays strong.....things just fall into place for me.

i like to get the ILY out first, so i *know* i mean it and am not just saying it out of courtesy or obligation. i don't even care if it's not said back, that's not important. it's important *I* say it so my head doesn't implode.

however, i don't like talking about those kinds of feelings. EVER.

which is a double edged sword because i'll live in denial or limbo....happily....forever and ever and ever until i get bored and come across someone of which I think will actually take the reins on *feelings* and i'll merge lanes to someone else without any interruption to my little "fantasy" i have in my head.

i like for someone to have a brass set of balls when romantic feelings are concerned, because i simply won't ever do it unless i'm forced to....then i'm fine. force me to....and i will do it, i won't leave then because i feel *safe*.

that probably made no sense. welcome to the venus/mars conjunction conflict. it's an every day event for me. 😕

click to expand

On the contrary,

dammit. merc in sag always write what i mean to say.

Posted by ellessque
lol....i think for me to actually believe someone if they were to say it now, after my atrocious experience with an aqua venus, I'd need a billboard, airplane with a banner and a viral you tube video....before I'd actually "believe" it.

For some reason, I just don't take the whole ILY crap that seriously anymore *shrugs*

i with you. i need Jesus to come down and tell me. i put so much doubt into what others say that i dont believe it. to say that i do, is just foolhardy to me. i just feel like im more at ease before the person says it. after they do, im stressed out wondering this or that about. drives me bat shit insane.

i've never said it first and only had it said to me once. just one long term relationship to date. i've not dated anyone for long enough for anyone to say it since, lol. apart from the psycho sag who said 'i must love you a little bit to be this crazy'....lol...not quite the same methinks.

btw...my ex husband did say it more than once during the marriage. made myself sound like a total loser then, lol.

Posted by ellessque
lol....i think for me to actually believe someone if they were to say it now, after my atrocious experience with an aqua venus, I'd need a billboard, airplane with a banner and a viral you tube video....before I'd actually "believe" it.

For some reason, I just don't take the whole ILY crap that seriously anymore *shrugs*

Could it be because they say it and run? HA HA HA

For me I say it when I feel it. It usually takes a few months if not longer. But if they say it first, no matter how soon or late, I feel I am suffocating, I am losing my freedom and I actually demolish the relationship so that way I can run freely again. If actions don't follow the saying of ILY it only makes matters worse!

Posted by exoskeleton
emotionally stir crazy (overwhelmed) - yes
ignoring the person - no

i know when someone loves me whether or not they say it, i know whether or not they mean it. so if it's genuine, why run and make them doubt me? just see how it can progress. if i've gotten that far with someone i have no problem expressing my feelings.

Agreed communication is the key people have been broken by many things around this away nothing chisels my curiosity. As each year holds negatives and positives you get older and wiser but not to mature to forget the necessities.

how can you know you love someone after a few month——? it took my ex husband and i 2 years to get to the 'l' word although granted there was a lot of volatility and on/offness in the air with us two but we still lasted 20 years. when he said it, the moment was spontaneous and i was happy to hear him say it.

lol...i don't even like being termed someone's girlfriend for at least 6 months!!!

notice how on this thread, no-one can even write out I LOVE YOU in full, what's that saying ppl? lol

Posted by seraph
Recognize ILY by its actions. It's a beautiful label, but the actions it represents - if they are apparent and palpable to you - make that phrase unnecessary. Real, deep and mature love needs no words. Platitudes and lovely phrases are just an extra helping of sugar on something already naturally sweet.

Beautifully written!

Posted by ellessque

Posted by NikkiMse1978

Posted by ellessque
lol....i think for me to actually believe someone if they were to say it now, after my atrocious experience with an aqua venus, I'd need a billboard, airplane with a banner and a viral you tube video....before I'd actually "believe" it.

For some reason, I just don't take the whole ILY crap that seriously anymore *shrugs*

Could it be because they say it and run? HA HA HA

For me I say it when I feel it. It usually takes a few months if not longer. But if they say it first, no matter how soon or late, I feel I am suffocating, I am losing my freedom and I actually demolish the relationship so that way I can run freely again. If actions don't follow the saying of ILY it only makes matters worse!

he didn't run...lol. I did.

I said it first and he stood there like a deer in headlights....like a stuffed deer in headlights. Like if he didn't move..it didn't really happen. It's bad enough to talk about feelings for me but when someone pulls post traumatic stress syndrome out on someone like me "epic awkwardness" is an epic understatement.

We are great friends now and I still occasionally say it to him, he doesn't panic so much these days because he knows it doesn't mean "relationship".

click to expand

I run myself only when I feel suffocated. Which is quite abit. My prob is I cannot get a grip on that! HELP!

It is good to see you saying doesn't mean relationship. I am happy you two are friends now. What are you like in relationships currently? Do you still run and stop them in there tracks?!?! 🙂~

Posted by R1g0rM0rT1s
notice how on this thread, no-one can even write out I LOVE YOU in full, what's that saying ppl? lol

I agree! I was thiking the same thing when I typed ILY!! *geesh

My tripple Sag ex said the words 6 months into knowing eachother at the end of a phone call. I told him to have a nice day, completely ignoring what just met my ears thinking it would be quite sometime before I had to face it again. He said it again only a month later, and the very words going thru my head that moment was, " I guess this is where I return it if I want to continue seeing him."

Posted by R1g0rM0rT1s
notice how on this thread, no-one can even write out I LOVE YOU in full, what's that saying ppl? lol

I noticed, it actually took me a minute to know what/who Ily was 😉

My ex said it after 2 months, I was good with it and affectionate as always. I was more uncomfortable with her looking at me waiting for me to say it back. I couldn't.

Posted by Ellybean
I love you I love you I love you I love you.

😛

They're just words people. Merely the cement of ongoing emotions beforehand, words that come with the say-ers perception of their meaning.

That's my perception of them anyways. 😉

As for the original question, never have become freaked out.

Vroom. Pm me that thread where your favorite sign of whatever is in pictures and such cant find it.

Posted by R1g0rM0rT1s
notice how on this thread, no-one can even write out I LOVE YOU in full, what's that saying ppl? lol

hellll naw. write it out? just as horrific as saying it

Posted by ellessque
my ex scorp told me after a MONTH. In the backseat of his sisters car as we were driving thru NYC on a spontaneous road trip we took for the holidays.

I tried to pretend I didn't hear it but he insisted and wanted to make sure I did. Gotdamn small spaces....it's not like I could jump out of the car...it was MOVING. (so wanted to dart, first reaction was to check to see if we were at a redlight 😄)

lmao. i dont know what i would have done! i would started sneezing uncontrollably or fake an asthma attack

i know others have said that words dont matter, but they do...why else would we gushy or apprehensive after hearing it.

could u honestly be in a relationship with someone who never said ILY?

Depends on what type of relationship it was if I stick my dick in you and leave it at that Ill probably tell you I love your pussy. This has nothing to do with your inside.

"could u honestly be in a relationship with someone who never said ILY?"

The importance of the word is different for each person and how much meaning they give to the word love. It's important to me but I've seen people throw it around like it's nothing. If you're uncomfortable throwing it around, at least you know that it has some significance to you.

Posted by DMV
do u find yourself to go a bit emotionally stir crazy and basically exhibit irrational behavior (i.e. ignoring the other person) after someone tells u ILY or that they have feelings for you?

Depends. I only froze once, largely because it was the first time the possibility scared the hell out of me. It was "real". On the other occasions I was young and in love with the "idea" of being loved, but it wasn't real, so I rolled with it . Wore it like a t-shirt that eventually needed to be laundered .

Posted by Ellybean


They're just words people.

I don't know about that.

Posted by ArticleL
Depends on what type of relationship it was if I stick my dick in you and leave it at that Ill probably tell you I love your pussy. This has nothing to do with your inside.

Uh...no? Are you not "inside"?

ily should be felt long before it is said.

there was one occassion when a guy i was dating told me he loved me... waaaaaaaaay too soon. i didnt freak out or anything. his emotional maturity just fell off a ladder in my eyes.

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by ArticleL
Depends on what type of relationship it was if I stick my dick in you and leave it at that Ill probably tell you I love your pussy. This has nothing to do with your inside.

Uh...no? Are you not "inside"?

click to expand

Mentally/feeling wise emoticon poptart.

Posted by ArticleL

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by ArticleL
Depends on what type of relationship it was if I stick my dick in you and leave it at that Ill probably tell you I love your pussy. This has nothing to do with your inside.

Uh...no? Are you not "inside"?

Mentally/feeling wise emoticon poptart.

click to expand

Posted by CreepyPants
ily should be felt long before it is said.

+2

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by CreepyPants
ily should be felt long before it is said.

+2

click to expand

+3


im all about feeling the love b4 its spoken. i couldnt be with a guy who never said it. itd be like a question in my mind during our entire relationship.

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by ArticleL

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by ArticleL
Depends on what type of relationship it was if I stick my dick in you and leave it at that Ill probably tell you I love your pussy. This has nothing to do with your inside.

Uh...no? Are you not "inside"?

Mentally/feeling wise emoticon poptart.

click to expand

😛