aNEWday
@aNEWday
14 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 1 · Posts: 1330 · Topics: 87
Anxiety
Pre-dating jitters. It goes away after a while.
it doesn't really matter what his sign is. another person doesn't cause anxiety...that is something you generate yourself based upon past experiences, insecurities, etc.
the problem comes when we think the other person is the cause of our anxiety...it makes us overthink and over analyse and in that process, we are not seeing things with a clear perspective...ie, we are not seeing things as they really are. we expect that person to behave in a way so as to reduce our anxiety and the more we expect it, the less chance there is of getting it. that's cos whatever someone does, if we have anxiety in relation to them, whatever they do - good or bad - just continues to feed our fears and INCREASES feelings of anxiety.
i would advise distancing yourself from him and working out what's at the root of your anxiety.
the early stages of dating should be FUN!!! if it's not....withdraw and regroup on your OWN. don't start looking for an external remedy for your feelings cos the cause of them is within YOU.
the problem comes when we think the other person is the cause of our anxiety...it makes us overthink and over analyse and in that process, we are not seeing things with a clear perspective...ie, we are not seeing things as they really are. we expect that person to behave in a way so as to reduce our anxiety and the more we expect it, the less chance there is of getting it. that's cos whatever someone does, if we have anxiety in relation to them, whatever they do - good or bad - just continues to feed our fears and INCREASES feelings of anxiety.
i would advise distancing yourself from him and working out what's at the root of your anxiety.
the early stages of dating should be FUN!!! if it's not....withdraw and regroup on your OWN. don't start looking for an external remedy for your feelings cos the cause of them is within YOU.
thanks for your input 🙂
@ nightbynight. Glad to hear you are going through a similar situation. Push and pull is probably what I would call it. Its probably esp worse because we are both scorps and kind of feel what the other person is feeling. But at the same time, its like an elephant in the room so to speak. Like we try to small talk when I know we both know what it might be deep down. I just don't know if this "feeling" is good or not lol. I can't quite put my finger on it.
@rockthenerds hahaha, wouldn't that be the perfect scenario to calm my ass down!
@rigor. Hmm, what you say is VERY interesting. I guess I say the anxiety is in relation to him because I never really feel like this with guys, and I am not normally an anxious person. I will def keep this in mind though. Maybe I do need to take time away and regroup.
We just need to hang out so that I can see if we would get along and hopefully this will go away. The anticipation is whats getting to me. Kind of like I have to make a big speech in front of a lot of ppl and I want to get it over with lol. I guess I want him to like me too. A mix of a lot of things. Ahh!
@ nightbynight. Glad to hear you are going through a similar situation. Push and pull is probably what I would call it. Its probably esp worse because we are both scorps and kind of feel what the other person is feeling. But at the same time, its like an elephant in the room so to speak. Like we try to small talk when I know we both know what it might be deep down. I just don't know if this "feeling" is good or not lol. I can't quite put my finger on it.
@rockthenerds hahaha, wouldn't that be the perfect scenario to calm my ass down!
@rigor. Hmm, what you say is VERY interesting. I guess I say the anxiety is in relation to him because I never really feel like this with guys, and I am not normally an anxious person. I will def keep this in mind though. Maybe I do need to take time away and regroup.
We just need to hang out so that I can see if we would get along and hopefully this will go away. The anticipation is whats getting to me. Kind of like I have to make a big speech in front of a lot of ppl and I want to get it over with lol. I guess I want him to like me too. A mix of a lot of things. Ahh!
As your jitters/anxiety builds according to your antipicaption ...... so will your expectations.
You like this person, obviously, and want this "hang out" to amount to the both of you liking each other enough to want to move to being able to call it a "date" ...... so, it's also obvious that your anxiety is fear that this "hang out" isn't going to live up to this expectation.
In which case ..... it's already doomed.
You could try getting a grip on yourself.
You like this person, obviously, and want this "hang out" to amount to the both of you liking each other enough to want to move to being able to call it a "date" ...... so, it's also obvious that your anxiety is fear that this "hang out" isn't going to live up to this expectation.
In which case ..... it's already doomed.
You could try getting a grip on yourself.
Roxi already said that ....
I am glad i made this post. Despite sometimes harsh responses, they open my eyes to reality, which is why I come here in the first place. After reading over the first few posts this morning, esp rig's I think my emotions have just been all over the place lately and this "anxiety" is just part if it.
Currently trying to get a hold I myself 😉
Taurus moon doesn't stabilize me as much as its supposed to. I want an easier moon for a few days lol.
Currently trying to get a hold I myself 😉
Taurus moon doesn't stabilize me as much as its supposed to. I want an easier moon for a few days lol.
Posted by P-Angel
As your jitters/anxiety builds according to your antipicaption ...... so will your expectations.
You like this person, obviously, and want this "hang out" to amount to the both of you liking each other enough to want to move to being able to call it a "date" ...... so, it's also obvious that your anxiety is fear that this "hang out" isn't going to live up to this expectation.
In which case ..... it's already doomed.
You could try getting a grip on yourself.
True unless hes knight in shining armor the odds of that....is the odds of me eating M&Ms. -.-
Posted by Rockthenerds
Smoke some weed with him. Fix him a sandwich. Dont talk so much.click to expand
Lol.
Young scorp men. I just can't seem to trust my brothers. Esp the ones with venus in libra 😉
I saw this guy today. Today was just an emotional rollercoaster of a day for me (not because of the scorp). Had a talk with a good friend and put everything in perspective. I was good and didn't have this anxiety of whether I would see him or not.
When I did we started chatting. He was ignoring me, like doing other things on the side ie. he was talking to other ppl while I was there waiting on him..not starting much communication with me. When I wanted to leave he didn't want me to. ok— (and no he was NOT busy, just small talk with others, facebooking..)
In the past I have noticed that he is VERY VERY flirty, to the point where in front of me I believe he is trying to make me jealous. Being a scorp this has raised some serious red flags for me (not to mention him being a scorp he SHOULD know this!) in the past which is why I never really took him seriously. After he was trying hard to speak to me every time I saw him, and I didn't see him flirting as much is when I decided to give him a chance. Welp, now that has been confirmed for me again. He cannot be trusted. We will see if he follows through for the hangout, but one thing's for sure I am no fool to his antics.
Seems like a topic I've seen here a lot. What is up with the scorp men—
...and there goes my expectations bahaha.
I saw this guy today. Today was just an emotional rollercoaster of a day for me (not because of the scorp). Had a talk with a good friend and put everything in perspective. I was good and didn't have this anxiety of whether I would see him or not.
When I did we started chatting. He was ignoring me, like doing other things on the side ie. he was talking to other ppl while I was there waiting on him..not starting much communication with me. When I wanted to leave he didn't want me to. ok— (and no he was NOT busy, just small talk with others, facebooking..)
In the past I have noticed that he is VERY VERY flirty, to the point where in front of me I believe he is trying to make me jealous. Being a scorp this has raised some serious red flags for me (not to mention him being a scorp he SHOULD know this!) in the past which is why I never really took him seriously. After he was trying hard to speak to me every time I saw him, and I didn't see him flirting as much is when I decided to give him a chance. Welp, now that has been confirmed for me again. He cannot be trusted. We will see if he follows through for the hangout, but one thing's for sure I am no fool to his antics.
Seems like a topic I've seen here a lot. What is up with the scorp men—
...and there goes my expectations bahaha.
Yup. Gotten anxiety with a male scorp friend, and I put it down to unpredictability.
We find security in common patterns and feeling like there are 'roots' in a relationship, but with him, he chops and changes like the wind (although he's proven to be loyal) but his behaviour can make me anxious.
It's easier to go with the flow and try and focus on other things.
We find security in common patterns and feeling like there are 'roots' in a relationship, but with him, he chops and changes like the wind (although he's proven to be loyal) but his behaviour can make me anxious.
It's easier to go with the flow and try and focus on other things.
Posted by MadamCrab
It's easier to go with the flow and try and focus on other things.
THIS seems to be the key. Funny how I am a scorp and can't quite understand this behavior. I have little patience for it too.
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