he doesnt listen

one of my biggest pet peeves is repeating myself. talking and having the person not really listening.

lately, i have been noticing that he doesnt remember the things that i tell him. ive let it go with little cute laughs (i am so trying to relate to his gemini moon) telling him to get it together. last night however, the moon had me feelin some kinda way. i was good until he walked in the room and i just felt like he was full of shit for some reason. so i decided to not talk to him.

he stared and eventually came up to me and started the 100th friggin conversation about my tattoos. he even asked me about my heart on my sleeve. i have told him exactly why i got this heart months ago. i looked in his eyes last night and asked him if he was serious. he said he doesnt know why i got the heart.

i lost it.

i looked him in the eye and asked him why he never remembers anything i tell him and that im sick of talking to him if he doesnt give a shit about listenting to me. i told him that for a split second, i actually believed he liked me, but that it was obvious ive been playin myself.

there was a room full of people, but i didnt give a shit. im tired of this same old song and dance and he is boring the shit outta me.

he asked me if i ever told him why he was drunk. i swear i almost blurted out, "when the fuck arent you drunk—" but i didnt. instead i just cut him short and told him that we're done. he said "yeah right" i didnt reply back. i just gave him my back and shooed him away like a knat.

he quickly retreated and sulked in the corner. i dont give a fuck. the promo was long in time coming, im just upset i did it in front of other people.

i sneaked out and i have been in such a bad mood ever since. i even felt like i could have broken out in tears at any moment at work. i know he's been thinking about the words "we're done" all day, because i have.

how would he feel if he told me things and i never listened or remembered.

i dont think im overreacting. everyone tells him that he drinks too much. 2 damn dui's in 3 weeks. takes skill to do that.

Posted by DMV
2 damn dui's in 3 weeks.

Drop him like a bag of rocks - quickly and away from your feet. Proceed to walk the other way.

You could have been thinking those words over and over again because you were surprised you had the chutzpah to speak it aloud.

Well, my boyfriend is kind of the same way. There are some things he remembers and some things he will completely forget about. Like you, I've mentioned a tattoo idea to him probably more than once (one that is very sentimental to me), and he keeps forgetting every time the idea is brought up. I remember everything he tells me, but that's just how I am with everyone.

Does it bother me sometimes, a little. But he's the kind of guy who's brain is going a mile a minute (mercury in taurus but has a moon in aquarius). He can easily jump from one topic to the next and never get back to the origin of his conversation. I find it pretty funny half the time when we're lost in a conversation and never get back to the beginning. He doesn't really notice though; well he does, but his mouth and brain are often moving too fast for him.

I can understand that it'd be frustrating for you. However, if this is something that is obviously a deal breaker for you, then you probably did the right thing by ending it. For me, this isn't as much of an issue. My boyfriend may forget, but he is always trying to listen, and he knows the most important things from the trivial.

Maybe tomorrow or a few days from now you'll get over this, but if not, no reason for you to dwell. My only thing is, you probably want to really lay it down on him again the reason for you outburst and your exit. I'm just a stickler for thinking that no conversation should end in a screaming match, especially in front of people. Not a good look, IMO. This is an issue that he obviously doesn't seem to dwell on, so you really have to let him know why.

Expecting an alert, responsive partnership from a person with a drinking problem probably is unrealistic.

Typical Male vs Female discussion.

You girls should read more about the biological reasons of why males appear like they are not listening when a female is talking to them, for instance..studies have shown that male brains interpret the female voice in the same manner they interpret music, so even if it may seem like we're paying full attention to every little single detail a female is telling us, we're only really memorizing practical and vital bits (for survival if you like) since practicality and to-the-pointness are also what characterize interactions among males for the most part.

Hoping you're doing well and this is being handled without issue 😢

Posted by DMV
one of my biggest pet peeves is repeating myself. talking and having the person not really listening.

lately, i have been noticing that he doesnt remember the things that i tell him. ive let it go with little cute laughs (i am so trying to relate to his gemini moon) telling him to get it together. last night however, the moon had me feelin some kinda way. i was good until he walked in the room and i just felt like he was full of shit for some reason. so i decided to not talk to him.

he stared and eventually came up to me and started the 100th friggin conversation about my tattoos. he even asked me about my heart on my sleeve. i have told him exactly why i got this heart months ago. i looked in his eyes last night and asked him if he was serious. he said he doesnt know why i got the heart.

i lost it.

i looked him in the eye and asked him why he never remembers anything i tell him and that im sick of talking to him if he doesnt give a shit about listenting to me. i told him that for a split second, i actually believed he liked me, but that it was obvious ive been playin myself.

there was a room full of people, but i didnt give a shit. im tired of this same old song and dance and he is boring the shit outta me.

he asked me if i ever told him why he was drunk. i swear i almost blurted out, "when the fuck arent you drunk—" but i didnt. instead i just cut him short and told him that we're done. he said "yeah right" i didnt reply back. i just gave him my back and shooed him away like a knat.

he quickly retreated and sulked in the corner. i dont give a fuck. the promo was long in time coming, im just upset i did it in front of other people.

i sneaked out and i have been in such a bad mood ever since. i even felt like i could have broken out in tears at any moment at work. i know he's been thinking about the words "we're done" all day, because i have.

how would he feel if he told me things and i never listened or remembered.

this describes my marriage to the aries completely. he never ever listened. it felt like everything i uttered wasn't worth listening to. it shows total lack of respect and it totally means lack of respect and it doesn't change either. if you want to be in a relationship at 'eye level' with someone, they have to listen. my ex husband who i was with for almost 20 years has no clue what i ever did for a living.

At least you said doesn't, instead of don't ....


There's a lot of people who would have said ... he don't listen .. and they would think that was good english




I don't really care about your issues .. just wanted to point out that you said doesn't, as in ... does not

there's a time and a place to be a pedant P, lol.

Posted by Candeh15
Well, my boyfriend is kind of the same way. There are some things he remembers and some things he will completely forget about. Like you, I've mentioned a tattoo idea to him probably more than once (one that is very sentimental to me), and he keeps forgetting every time the idea is brought up. I remember everything he tells me, but that's just how I am with everyone.

Does it bother me sometimes, a little. But he's the kind of guy who's brain is going a mile a minute (mercury in taurus but has a moon in aquarius). He can easily jump from one topic to the next and never get back to the origin of his conversation. I find it pretty funny half the time when we're lost in a conversation and never get back to the beginning. He doesn't really notice though; well he does, but his mouth and brain are often moving too fast for him.

I can understand that it'd be frustrating for you. However, if this is something that is obviously a deal breaker for you, then you probably did the right thing by ending it. For me, this isn't as much of an issue. My boyfriend may forget, but he is always trying to listen, and he knows the most important things from the trivial.

Maybe tomorrow or a few days from now you'll get over this, but if not, no reason for you to dwell. My only thing is, you probably want to really lay it down on him again the reason for you outburst and your exit. I'm just a stickler for thinking that no conversation should end in a screaming match, especially in front of people. Not a good look, IMO. This is an issue that he obviously doesn't seem to dwell on, so you really have to let him know why.

thanks Candeh...as one scorpio moon to another...maybe im just anxious and impatient. to want someone so bad but nothing can be done about it. so maybe i play my little intensity, turn up the heat games to make him feel as sad as i do. why should he be happy while im sad because of him and myself.

yes im upset for him not remembering why i got the heart on my sleeve. especially since it was because it healed a broken heart. at the same time, he breaks it as well 😢

fuck. i hate being this emotional.

"were done" TRANSLATION "i want you in my life everyday."

yeah he got this drinkin problem. yeah i fuck other dudes. yeah he fucks other hoes but that doesnt change the love for him that i have.

maybe i punish him for not giving me what i

Posted by Nights22
Arent you the sag chick who is fucking a bunch of air sign dudes?

Idk why you care that he doesn't listen. Its not like you guys are in a real relationship.

naw, im the sag chick who fucks air, water, and fire dudes.

your right though, we arent in a real relationship. something is in the room when were both in it.

Posted by DazedScorp

Posted by DMV
i dont think im overreacting. everyone tells him that he drinks too much. 2 damn dui's in 3 weeks. takes skill to do that.

No...

It's takes an "IDGAF" attitude about life and more importantly, towards women.

Why do you put up with it?

click to expand

L-O-V-E

Posted by sheathedclaws

Posted by DMV
2 damn dui's in 3 weeks.

Drop him like a bag of rocks - quickly and away from your feet. Proceed to walk the other way.

You could have been thinking those words over and over again because you were surprised you had the chutzpah to speak it aloud.

click to expand

Friggin mars transit.

Posted by DazedScorp
As someone who has walked in his shoes...

You deserve better than that, DMV.

i know...my mind and heart is so not aligned.

For some reason this reads as if he was toying with you. It's like a joke gone bad since you blew up lol, but I don't get the impression that he didn't remember for some reason. Just wanted to push your buttons is what I'm getting.

UPDATE**************

So ever since that night, W-O-W. he has been tip top, perfect. perfect perfect. and im not the only one whose noticed. his friends and my friends have noticed his change in behavior towards me. he's always been ok, but this is different. its like he opened up more and is being that ear that i need. i am rewarding him graciously.

part of me thinks he's setting me up but a greater part thinks he is adjusting to please me.