PlutoVenus
@PlutoVenus
14 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 234 · Topics: 4
People are selfish
yes, they are selfish ... very selfish
And the very thing that makes them the absolute MOST selfish .. they have no clue that it does, which means they are ignorant on top of it.
Treating people the way YOU want to be treated, which is most people's philosophy .. is the most selfish you can ever be, since it equates to you treating them the way YOU want to be treated and not the way They want to be treated.
Everyone is different .. and nobody wants to be treated like you, except you. They want to be treated the way THEY want to be treated.
that is the ultimate selfish act .... they don't have to live up to your standards that you set for yourself, and if you really cared about the other people .. you'd realize that they don't have to cater to you, according to your standards, because they aren't you.
They are them, and they should be treated according to their own personal standards.
I'm likely the ONLY person who realizes this selfishness ... all the rest of you, who are not only this selfish, you also practice it as if it isn't being selfish .... are so self-centered when it comes to this, that the reality of it escapes you and you think you're treating people good .. you have no clue that you treat them wrong.
For this reason .... unconditional "anything", especially love ... doesn't exist
And the very thing that makes them the absolute MOST selfish .. they have no clue that it does, which means they are ignorant on top of it.
Treating people the way YOU want to be treated, which is most people's philosophy .. is the most selfish you can ever be, since it equates to you treating them the way YOU want to be treated and not the way They want to be treated.
Everyone is different .. and nobody wants to be treated like you, except you. They want to be treated the way THEY want to be treated.
that is the ultimate selfish act .... they don't have to live up to your standards that you set for yourself, and if you really cared about the other people .. you'd realize that they don't have to cater to you, according to your standards, because they aren't you.
They are them, and they should be treated according to their own personal standards.
I'm likely the ONLY person who realizes this selfishness ... all the rest of you, who are not only this selfish, you also practice it as if it isn't being selfish .... are so self-centered when it comes to this, that the reality of it escapes you and you think you're treating people good .. you have no clue that you treat them wrong.
For this reason .... unconditional "anything", especially love ... doesn't exist
Posted by PlutoVenus
... who are only trying to get thing their way, and not bothering about their behavior and what it does to friendship
Everyone wants their own way .... everything everybody does is for their own benefit.
A person's behaviour doesn't have to be approved by you ... perhaps, shedding yourself of expectations would be a prudent move ... then you won't have to be disgruntled because you won't be believing that the other person owes you a behaviour criteria, to suit you.
Or, you could just say it was joke, while we all know it wasn't .... and you are indeed put-off because your people aren't abiding by what you consider proper.
Unfortunately that's life
That's something you can't change
The only person you can change and control is YOU. So instead of taking it personal & focusing only on how others oughta be, instead take their mistakes & remind yourself of how NOT to be.
As long as YOU'RE not selfish or only care about yourself, that's all that matters. Other people that way won't/shouldn't affect your life. It'd only affect your life if you were that way. So be glad you're not that way & only entertain & befriend people who are more like you =)
That's something you can't change
The only person you can change and control is YOU. So instead of taking it personal & focusing only on how others oughta be, instead take their mistakes & remind yourself of how NOT to be.
As long as YOU'RE not selfish or only care about yourself, that's all that matters. Other people that way won't/shouldn't affect your life. It'd only affect your life if you were that way. So be glad you're not that way & only entertain & befriend people who are more like you =)
What I can't tolerate:
*People who are oblivious of how their actions/words affect others. Unhappy people generally don't have good friendships/relationships with others well b/c..they're um unhappy
*People who complain about unhappiness but yet do nothing about it. They spend their entire life trying to change everyone else, instead of focusing on bettering themselves & taking the chance that if they become a good person, they're more likely to attract a better quality of people
What I CAN tolerate:
*People who make mistakes, yes, BUT who learn from them the 1st time
*People who make mistakes, yes, but don't make everyone pay/suffer for their mistakes
*People who are self-aware & who aren't in denial about their flaws/problems. They know that they have some fixing to do, but instead of running from looking in the mirror, they ask for your understanding. I respect people like this =)
*People who are oblivious of how their actions/words affect others. Unhappy people generally don't have good friendships/relationships with others well b/c..they're um unhappy
*People who complain about unhappiness but yet do nothing about it. They spend their entire life trying to change everyone else, instead of focusing on bettering themselves & taking the chance that if they become a good person, they're more likely to attract a better quality of people
What I CAN tolerate:
*People who make mistakes, yes, BUT who learn from them the 1st time
*People who make mistakes, yes, but don't make everyone pay/suffer for their mistakes
*People who are self-aware & who aren't in denial about their flaws/problems. They know that they have some fixing to do, but instead of running from looking in the mirror, they ask for your understanding. I respect people like this =)
lol
I agree and disagree with P-angel.
I would like to be treated the same way I treat most people on an emotional level, which is in a cold, detached manner.
I also wish people would treat me the same way I treat them in every other way that isn't emotional, which is in a purely logical manner.
Cold, hard, logic brings out a selflessness and sacrificial side in people that emotionality doesn't.
Truth.
I would like to be treated the same way I treat most people on an emotional level, which is in a cold, detached manner.
I also wish people would treat me the same way I treat them in every other way that isn't emotional, which is in a purely logical manner.
Cold, hard, logic brings out a selflessness and sacrificial side in people that emotionality doesn't.
Truth.
Posted by 1two3go
Cold, hard, logic brings out a selflessness and sacrificial side in people that emotionality doesn't.
Truth.
There is sense and nonsense in this. But that is duality for you.
Posted by 1two3go
I would like to be treated the same way I treat most people on an emotional level, which is in a cold, detached manner.
I also wish people would treat me the same way I treat them in every other way that isn't emotional, which is in a purely logical manner.
Indeed .. most people are just like that.
And that was my point. You want to be treated the way you treat others ... however, this would mean that you aren't treating them the way they want to be treated, according to what makes them happy, and their standards and values that they associate with proper treatment ... you do it according to your own standards and values.
Which is the ultimate selfishness.
It's highly likely that the reason this term exists ....... "Treat others as you want to be treated" ....... is because humans are barbaric, if not controlled, and actually have to be coached.
Just like most of the people here have to believe in a god, otherwise, they wouldn't know how to control themselves if they didn't have a fear of punishment to intimadate them into being good.
Sad, really 😢
Just like most of the people here have to believe in a god, otherwise, they wouldn't know how to control themselves if they didn't have a fear of punishment to intimadate them into being good.
Sad, really 😢
** i
intimidate
intimidate
P-Angel I totally agree with everything you wrote, and thanks for sharing your opinion I never saw this situation from that point of view.
"For this reason .... unconditional "anything", especially love ... doesn't exist", this is 100% true, nobody doesn't do something nice for someone without hoping that the other person will do something nice for them in return. That whole unconditional love thing can only work maybe with parents, but even with them I think it has it's limit.
"For this reason .... unconditional "anything", especially love ... doesn't exist", this is 100% true, nobody doesn't do something nice for someone without hoping that the other person will do something nice for them in return. That whole unconditional love thing can only work maybe with parents, but even with them I think it has it's limit.
How would one know how someone else wishes to be treated?
Posted by PecheressePosted by 1two3go
I agree and disagree with P-angel.
I would like to be treated the same way I treat most people on an emotional level, which is in a cold, detached manner.
I also wish people would treat me the same way I treat them in every other way that isn't emotional, which is in a purely logical manner.
Cold, hard, logic brings out a selflessness and sacrificial side in people that emotionality doesn't.
Truth.
Why exactly would you like to suppress emotions?click to expand
Because of that 2nd to the last line.
Also things ALWAYS go wrong when I get emotional. ALWAYS.
I think all aquarians are particularly bad with this. There is a time to be emotional that we ALWAYS get wrong.
Posted by P-AngelPosted by 1two3go
I would like to be treated the same way I treat most people on an emotional level, which is in a cold, detached manner.
I also wish people would treat me the same way I treat them in every other way that isn't emotional, which is in a purely logical manner.
Indeed .. most people are just like that.
And that was my point. You want to be treated the way you treat others ... however, this would mean that you aren't treating them the way they want to be treated, according to what makes them happy, and their standards and values that they associate with proper treatment ... you do it according to your own standards and values.
Which is the ultimate selfishness.
click to expand
That's the conundrum, though, isn't it: even treating someone how THEY would like to be treated is selfish in an indirect way because you're getting something back namely that hidden feeling of superiority that people who treat others as they themselves would like to be treated feel deep deep deep down.
You see this person who you're treating as they would like to be treated to be inferior to you still, simply because they almost always will NEVER reciprocate.
I guess that's where astrology got the whole "aquas are more caring to strangers than members of their own family" description:
I figure I will never see this person again so I might as well go all out.
Which becomes a problem when whatever selfless act you perform (usually listening and not judging) makes them want you in their lives.
Life is a headfuck, man...
Posted by PecheressePosted by 1two3goPosted by PecheressePosted by 1two3go
I agree and disagree with P-angel.
I would like to be treated the same way I treat most people on an emotional level, which is in a cold, detached manner.
I also wish people would treat me the same way I treat them in every other way that isn't emotional, which is in a purely logical manner.
Cold, hard, logic brings out a selflessness and sacrificial side in people that emotionality doesn't.
Truth.
Why exactly would you like to suppress emotions?
Because of that 2nd to the last line.
Also things ALWAYS go wrong when I get emotional. ALWAYS.
I think all aquarians are particularly bad with this. There is a time to be emotional that we ALWAYS get wrong.
Well that's not just the case for aquarians, emotions are a mindfuck, and usually when you let them out someone twists them and throws them back in your face.click to expand
+1
You might as well be physically naked. If your thoughts and feelings can be read through your body language imagine how accesible they are when it comes out in an emotional display.
You see that look in the witness's eyes after and you realise they have acquired a piece of you, like glass, both fragile and dangerous, that you will never get back.
You've handed them the weapon and the countdown to the day it's drawn has begun.
Posted by PecheressePosted by 1two3goPosted by PecheressePosted by 1two3goPosted by PecheressePosted by 1two3go
I agree and disagree with P-angel.
I would like to be treated the same way I treat most people on an emotional level, which is in a cold, detached manner.
I also wish people would treat me the same way I treat them in every other way that isn't emotional, which is in a purely logical manner.
Cold, hard, logic brings out a selflessness and sacrificial side in people that emotionality doesn't.
Truth.
Why exactly would you like to suppress emotions?
Because of that 2nd to the last line.
Also things ALWAYS go wrong when I get emotional. ALWAYS.
I think all aquarians are particularly bad with this. There is a time to be emotional that we ALWAYS get wrong.
Well that's not just the case for aquarians, emotions are a mindfuck, and usually when you let them out someone twists them and throws them back in your face.
+1
You might as well be physically naked. If your thoughts and feelings can be read through your body language imagine how accesible they are when it comes out in an emotional display.
You see that look in the witness's eyes after and you realise they have acquired a piece of you, like glass, both fragile and dangerous, that you will never get back.
You've handed them the weapon and the countdown to the day it's drawn has begun.
Yeah NLP + Emotions = Kaboom.
But also, expressing a lot of emotions can be a strategy for some people. I'm reading that awesome book called the 33 strategies of war. You should check it out. It's got so many examples of strategies involving emotions. It's pretty sickening when you realize they're being taken for granted by someone we trust...click to expand
Ah, and now we come to the other side of emotional display, namely trap setting or manipulation.
The book shall be wikipediad. Puts me in the mind of "48 Laws of Power". THAT was a fun read.
Posted by Reason
on a fun note, PlutoVenus, when asked to 'Describe yourself...? Me,Myself and I' 🙂
You can not be serious? That answer was a joke, as is pretty much every answer I gave on those questions (if you actually have red them). The reason why I posted this question here is because I wanted to know where is the border of tolerance for scorpios.
Sadly I am not, or at least not enough besides the fact that I am only child 🙂. Maybe with age I will finally learn how to be 😛
hahahahahahah insanely happy
Do you think that in some situations being selfish is justified?
Unfortunately, though not in all circumstances obviously, I think a lot of people don't comprehend to what extent selfishness can roam. Its nearly impossible to watch your actions to see how each person is taking in said expression. I'd say a majority of problems I've had with people and dealing with selfishness was either a misunderstanding or the person in a personal confusion. Lol this conversation always makes me feel like I'm arguing the lord of the flies debate all over again. I truly believe most people overall mean well. Our society is getting so impersonal that we start to feel more and more alienated. Which leads to more and more thoughts of I'm isolating the world, its not isolating me. This typically solidifies alienation, which eventually turns to morbid thinking and more negative feelings. We start to feel like its a dog eat dog world, and acting on those feelings has a domino effect. I think the worst feeling of all is being lonely in a crowd. I wouldn't wish that on anyone, but its easy to break a person down and make them viscous. Those that strive to be selfless people will save the world lol. They're the only ones strong enough to do so. Especially when they start to realize how often they fail but continue to try regardless.
Posted by everevolvingepithet
I guess putting it under 'selfish' leaves it open to a lot of interpretation, but it depends on the situation.
With people and/or their emotions etc ?
No, that's parasitic and cakey eatey imo. With things like jobs etc I think it's par for the course in a lot of places cos most people are imo.
Again it's situation specific imo.
By best friend is every once in a while telling me: "you know Marija is ok to be selfish once in a while" and usually that is about me my friend needs before my own. I am usually too giving in situations with close friends to the point that I will change totally my things that I have to take care of for their benefit (moon in pisces in 11 house) 🙂. So do you think that in those situations it is ok?
Posted by Sickleesweet
Unfortunately, though not in all circumstances obviously, I think a lot of people don't comprehend to what extent selfishness can roam. Its nearly impossible to watch your actions to see how each person is taking in said expression. I'd say a majority of problems I've had with people and dealing with selfishness was either a misunderstanding or the person in a personal confusion. Lol this conversation always makes me feel like I'm arguing the lord of the flies debate all over again. I truly believe most people overall mean well. Our society is getting so impersonal that we start to feel more and more alienated. Which leads to more and more thoughts of I'm isolating the world, its not isolating me. This typically solidifies alienation, which eventually turns to morbid thinking and more negative feelings. We start to feel like its a dog eat dog world, and acting on those feelings has a domino effect. I think the worst feeling of all is being lonely in a crowd. I wouldn't wish that on anyone, but its easy to break a person down and make them viscous. Those that strive to be selfless people will save the world lol. They're the only ones strong enough to do so. Especially when they start to realize how often they fail but continue to try regardless.
Sickleesweet I see your moon in aquarius kicking in 🙂. I love your vies on society. People are getting more and more distant from each other on a emotional level that is the reason why often we all feel like we are alone in a crowd.
This situation goes from people I have known for 10 years to people I have known for the past 2 years, and it's just something I have seen in a lot of people on a daily basis, just having their own needs as number one but maybe that is how it should be in reality, I don't know *shrugs*
Posted by everevolvingepithet
You know them better than I as to whether you should employ that 1st line word for word though lol
hahahahaha I think I am just gonna try to make myself a bit emotionally distant
Umm nothing specific just when I talk with people about how much they are ready to give as friends mine view and their are different.
😄 Bob Marley says, "Truth is, everybody's going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for."
Posted by Sickleesweet
😄 Bob Marley says, "Truth is, everybody's going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for."
this is gonna be my new life theme. next to: "the only constant thing in life is pain you just have to figure out a way how to use it"
Lol remembering things like that help more than I'd ever thought. Honestly, the quote I gave you was the topper that convinced me to give the aries I date now a chance. I thought he was inconsistent and wanted to avoid the whole problem regardless of how much fun I had with him. Turns out my assumptions weren't entirely true. He is actually very good to me. Sometimes letting down the wall turns out for the better.
Posted by aquadieselPosted by PlutoVenus
I have been dealing with too much selfish people lately, who are only trying to get thing their way, and not bothering about their behavior and what it does to friendship, and I am first trying to put their interest before my own. Big mistake.
So what really upsets you when dealing with friends, what can you tolerate and what cant?
are u an aqua? lolclick to expand
noup I'm a virgo with moon in pisces and venus in scopio to emotional for my taste 🙂
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So what really upsets you when dealing with friends, what can you tolerate and what cant?