Upgrading

Are you competitive?

With whom do you compete?

Why do you feel compelled to do so?

I compete with myself. Only.

Super competitive.
Mostly with co-workers.
Sometimes with lovers

""I like people to tell me I can't do something that I WANT to do, I go ahead and do it anyway and then rub it in their face. ""


lololol

I did that in one of my more difficult college courses. I did kinda poorly on the first exam and then one of my friends kept asking, "Are you sure you don't need my help, hon? If you need help, call me, k? Do you understand this material?" And I was like, "Wth is he talking to? I will blow your ass out of the water." Well, I didn't say that out loud, but in my head. But yea, I made it a point to score much higher than he did on every paper and exam after that.

So I guess that means I do compete with others then.

""Lately though with "settling down", babies and relationships coming into my thoughts, I haven't been that competitive.""

Ah, no need for the long face. We're young yet.

Whaddya say we get all dolled up, you and me, and scope out Wall Street for more suitable prospects...

lol

lol

lmao

Bill crushes anything in his path.

""I did talk to a wall street prospect. He was too old for me. He went from 31 to 35 to 39. Thats when I said no. ""


- lol He was probably really 47.

I'm in the same boat as Brahn when it comes to competition. I compete for the sake of competing all the time but in the end I gain something when I do. Whether you win or lose you gain something when you compete, whether it be self knowledge, knowledge of the competition/competitors or tips on improving oneself. It's a form of improving and pushing yourself. Competition is basically just standards. You set those standards but things outside of yourself, ie. society, set those standards for you even before you came to terms with what you have set for yourself already.

I see competing against yourself as a losing battle. You just can't win because you either set standards too high or too low for yourself so you can never gage where you really are. You just learn what you've already known and that is what you can and cannot accomplish. You plateau and there are no significant gains or losses. You need that outside influence to help you set the bar so you can see exactly where you stand. That way when you do finally overcome that obstacle so you can set the bar even higher for yourself and others.

You can only take swings at batting practice fastballs for so long it's not until you have to face actual pitching that you know where you truly stand as a hitter.

lmao

I never lose at anything.

Notice, I said I compete *with* myself, not *against* myself. Generally, I try to be mindful of my choice of words.

When I say I compete with myself it means I am always striving to do better that what I've done previously. It means complacency is a no-no. It means I am not concerned about keeping up with The Jones', so to speak, becuase they won't be the ones reaping the benefits of what I've sown, and vice versa. All I'm saying is that my eye is on the prize, and all else is in the peripheral.

That's not competing. That's practice. We talkin' bout practice.

It is competing.

Practice isn't competing. It's honing your skills. You can only practice for so long until you actually have actual competition.

I am right. You are wrong.


Finito.

No one's wrong. Your definition and my definition are different. It's a tie because no one is wrong or right. Don't you hate ties.

I win.

You can't win if I've already won.


You lose.

I lost first. Therefore I win at losing.

I won-lost.

I guess we both lose since he wins?

Better than settling for mediocrity.

Practice and Competition are the same thing, only one involves a prize. It's a matter of comparison. I can just as well compare myself against myself.

""First time since your breath in DXP.... you have made sense...""


Pot, I'd like you to meet Kettle!

What's the point? You can compete with yourself all the time and get better and better but that doesn't really result in any other gain. So you're better with what you have big woop you set your own bar meaning it's not really competition you just gage where you are right now as to where you were then. It's not competition it's a measuring stick. Competition not only gages where you are it sets the standards higher than what you had expected. Competing against yourself is handicapping yourself to what you can do already. Say you work hard at work and you want to work harder. You end up working harder but then you end up finding out that someone else works the hardest. I'm not saying limit yourself to others expectations just don't limit yourself to your own expectations. Outside influences have as much as in impact as inside influences and people who don't realize that end up on the losing end of the competition.

One example that comes to mind is women who compete for men's attenion. Because I am a woman, I have experienced this on occassion.

I never understood it, really. Do you suppose it is instinctual?

Whenever I notice a female who seems to have her eye on a guy, I back off. Competing with other women seems so futile. I know there are things that some women have that I don't (mentally, physically, or emotionally). I can't be "that woman", because I wasn't made like her, so I'm not even going to try. I can only be the best me I can be. In the same token, she can't be me.

If you have what a person wants, then you have it. I can't imagine pretentiousness not being a turn-off.

""You can compete with yourself all the time and get better and better but that doesn't really result in any other gain.""

It can result in getting a higher education, career advancement, better health, etc. So no, you're not better with what you have, you're better with what you had AND more.

Sure, you're essentially competing with other applicants to get into school, with other employees to get a raise...but your focus isn't on them, your focus is on yourself, and pushing yourself to your fullest potential. Because if all you're concerned about is one-upping the next person, that can be limiting, since it may not require you push yourself to capacity.

That's an outside influence affecting you on how you would compete right there. You can't be that woman but the way she went about competing for that guy influenced you on whether or not you should pursue or let it pass. You chose to let it pass and it led to you changing your tactics in that arena of competition. So you try another way in competing in that arena and that is to be yourself because through years of life experience and practice you are the best you you can be. So in a way her being some pretentious biotch led to you being whoever you are seeing as this is a better way to win in that competition, ie. getting some guy in your example. Just because it's a competition doesn't mean the prize changes it just has different packaging if we're talking about getting a guy.

Hey, I was going to say that! But, you still lose because I thought of it first, you just posted your message before mine. Another lose-win for DK.

Stop stealing my thoughts. Did M teach you how to do that?

You might push your own capacity but you need those other people to push you to push yourself. Life is built on competition and if you only take in what you can do someone else might/will overtake you while your focus is solely on yourself because they can adjust better not only to themselves but to their surroundings. You can better yourself as much as you want but in the end if you're competing for a job or a higher education someone put those stipulations to begin with in order for you to start from and to force you to achieve more than you could. Those limitations set by others is what forces you to be better than what you are. Outside forces tell you you CAN be better and plant that seed in your head saying I WILL be better. You cannot have one without the other.

Oh shut up. LET'S MAKEOUT! EVERYONE GRAB SOMEONE NOW AND JUST DO IT! I have to take a cold shower soon.

Life is indeed based on competition and interdependence. It doesn't mean you have to compete. I acknowledge and agree with the benefits of competition. Another question I have: Why DO we compete? Not on a personal level, but as a species. Do you think life could be more satisfying if we didn't?

""you need those other people to push you to push yourself.""

SOME people do. Others are internally motivated.

I get what you guys are saying though. That I wouldn't know what to strive for, or what was "best" if someone hadn't set that standard. I'm just saying that for the most part, I set my own standards, and they often don't reflect what those around me are doing. I understand that I am indirectly affected. I'm saying it doesn't *directly* concern me.

Show me!