Do Taurus men have a wandering eye?

I just recently noticed my bf checking out other women. Not sure if I'm just being sensitive and blowing this out of proportion or not? Other than this, things are actually going better.

To mention or not?

Hm what was happening before this action of wandering eyes? What's good now?

I am a Taurus stellium fixed woman omg. I better not look. I look down when I walk..I am fixed on beauty whatever it is. If I make eye contact with you I will look and have wondering eyes. But I am just looking and that's it.

I'm a Taurus and I have a wandering eye.. We just admire beauty but I'm incredibly faithful to my Leo

I'm fiercely loyal and faithful but I'm guilty of the wandering eye. I just maintain eye contact with the other half to avoid any bitching.

Wandering Eye....
It's hurtful and creates insecurity in the person you are with. This 'admiring beauty' excuse is a load of butter in my opinion.

OP, I noticed that Taurus men respond well to playfulness, maybe bring it up in a non confrontional way before it happens again, tell him how you feel and see what he says.....don't wait until it happens again to say something because your emotions will interfere.
I had a minor problem with my Bull's wandering eye once and I regret I didn't say anything straight away...to his defence he deflected quite quickly and made me laugh so I let it go because I didn't want to spoil the night since we are in a LTR. When I brought it up over the phone later on he didn't even remember the incident.
I think guys have the habit to look at women but if you don't want him to do it while he is with you, make it a rule. If he cares about the relationship he will do his best to control himself.
I will talk to my Taurus about wandering eyes before I see him again and if he doesn't stop I will act exactly the same way towards other guys to make him feel the way I do so maybe he will get it. Otherwise I will have to say goodbye.

as long as they are not crude about it, who cares? men are visual creatures. they are going to look. i play a game with my bull and even point out the pretty girls for him to notice. it's lighthearted and fun.

please don't start making rules. he's not a child and you're not his parent. what will you do if he breaks the rule? send him to his room without dinner? come on, be an adult.

Posted by jeane
as long as they are not crude about it, who cares? men are visual creatures. they are going to look. i play a game with my bull and even point out the pretty girls for him to notice. it's lighthearted and fun.

please don't start making rules. he's not a child and you're not his parent. what will you do if he breaks the rule? send him to his room without dinner? come on, be an adult.

I fully agree with jeane

MissAquarious, I can see your plan to let it flow mantra is crumbling....... don´t be insecure...... and your mantra had a flaw in the very basics.... you don´t want to change.... you need to change, you know this, please do it...... change your mindset and your behaviour, because you will just suffer on a daily basis...

as I said before, your taurus will not go anywhere and will not broke up with you..... you have to believe in yourself and change your attitude... but from within... it will take time, but again, your bull is not going to break up with you....... only if you carry on in these insecurities all the time

Thanks for the responses 🙂

I don't agree with making a game out of it either way. I hate tit for tat- feel it is a game no one wins. And pointing out other attractive women to my man either sounds like I'm looking to have a threesome or that I'm using that game to cover up my own insecurities- like it would be better if I beat him to it? No way!

My Aqua self went the direct road- the only way I know how lol. I told him that I've been noticing this lately. That I have specific examples. That it hurts my feelings. That I understand there are lots of attractive people out there and neither of us are blind... But to stare or make several glances (esp while we are in a conversation) is disrespectful and hurtful. I asked him how he would feel if I did the same.

I asked him if he would trust me less if I did the same. I told him... If you're willing to do that in front of me, what do you do behind my back?

He felt terrible and actually teared up a bit. He said he didn't realize he was doing it. I asked him if he remembered this specific woman. He did. I made my point.

Only time will tell... But at least I was honest and made my point. I do believe he is faithful to me and was just "admiring beauty" but triple and quadruple takes are uncalled for... And hurtful 😢

Miss Aqua, read my comment please

Posted by MissAquarious
Thanks for the responses 🙂

I don't agree with making a game out of it either way. I hate tit for tat- feel it is a game no one wins. And pointing out other attractive women to my man either sounds like I'm looking to have a threesome or that I'm using that game to cover up my own insecurities- like it would be better if I beat him to it? No way!

My Aqua self went the direct road- the only way I know how lol. I told him that I've been noticing this lately. That I have specific examples. That it hurts my feelings. That I understand there are lots of attractive people out there and neither of us are blind... But to stare or make several glances (esp while we are in a conversation) is disrespectful and hurtful. I asked him how he would feel if I did the same.

I asked him if he would trust me less if I did the same. I told him... If you're willing to do that in front of me, what do you do behind my back?

He felt terrible and actually teared up a bit. He said he didn't realize he was doing it. I asked him if he remembered this specific woman. He did. I made my point.

Only time will tell... But at least I was honest and made my point. I do believe he is faithful to me and was just "admiring beauty" but triple and quadruple takes are uncalled for... And hurtful 😢

the direct approach is always the best but i will say

a) neither of us are looking for a threesome.
b) pointing out attractive women doesn't mean i am insecure. the converse of that is tearing down other women means i am confident. i can appreciate a good set of boobs, or nice set of legs as well as the next person. by pointing them out, what actually happens is that it losses its appeal. it's everywhere. the forbidden becomes the common place. and it is common place. there are lots of beautiful and attractive women walking around. i'm not going to force him to put blinders on so i can feel good about myself.

you've now guilt tripped your guy into behaving a certain way. you've told him you don't trust him and that he has to confine his behaviour for fear of upsetting your sensibilities. all good and well but what about the next time something upsets you, you'll tell him again and he'll feel bad and adjust his behaviour. and the next time, and the next and when you hit a really big issue, where his actions are completely out of line, you'll take the approach again but after all these times when you've hen pecked him, he'll feel nagged. he'll feel he is not good enough. he'll feel like he can't make you happy.

bottom line is, control other people sparingly - you may win the battle, but you'll lose the war.

@pandora- thanks for promoting me to read your post 🙂 I somehow missed it the first time. Probably because I was reading so early in the morning 🙂

Thanks for the mantra reminder. Things have been going so well lately that I haven't thought about it for several days. You are right about changing. The truth is I guess I am feeling more insecure physically lately. While I'm pretty sure I would have noticed my bull doing this in the past, my weight has been on my mind lately and I'm sure I'm being much more sensitive about these things. Not that I wouldn't have gotten upset seeing this behavior (because I stil think it is disrespectful) maybe it wouldn't have bothered me as much? Maybe...

@jeane- I disagree that the opposite is tearing other women down. I don't do that, and my bull doesn't either. I find nothing wrong with noticing or appreciating beautiful things... But it can go too far

But if his behaviour makes her hurt and disrespected she needs to say this to him.
OP I think you did the right thing.

When I'm with someone I really don't have time or energy to notice other men. I make a concious effort not to let my eyes wander because I think it's disrespectful to everyone involved. I look when I'm alone and I don't look at people who have their partners with them and avoid their eyes too.
But if the Bull sees nothing wrong with looking around and ignores my wishes I will make him feel exactly what I feel by looking and attracting other men just to prove my point. See how he copes
...

Funnily enough when I'm with him the lesbians throw themselves at me, I don't get it! He even "jokingly " brought up the 3some talk because of it which I sharply replied: "fine, who's is the other man?" Because I'm not attracted to feminine energy and I actually like penis. I told him if he wants to do an orgy, 3some or whatever he can go and have fun but don't expect me to be part of it or take him seriously afterwards......

Also @jeane- I'm not coming from a place of trying to control his behavior ... But by letting him know this hurts me givings him the opportunity to notice and change his behavior if he wishes. If it continues or gets worse then I know I've said my peace and I can deal with it or not

Posted by Goldfish
But if his behaviour makes her hurt and disrespected she needs to say this to him.
OP I think you did the right thing.

When I'm with someone I really don't have time or energy to notice other men. I make a concious effort not to let my eyes wander because I think it's disrespectful to everyone involved. I look when I'm alone and I don't look at people who have their partners with them and avoid their eyes too.
But if the Bull sees nothing wrong with looking around and ignores my wishes I will make him feel exactly what I feel by looking and attracting other men just to prove my point. See how he copes
...

Funnily enough when I'm with him the lesbians throw themselves at me, I don't get it! He even "jokingly " brought up the 3some talk because of it which I sharply replied: "fine, who's is the other man?" Because I'm not attracted to feminine energy and I actually like penis. I told him if he wants to do an orgy, 3some or whatever he can go and have fun but don't expect me to be part of it or take him seriously afterwards......

goldfish, can we get an update on your situation please, in another forum? so you dont give advice what you dont follow internally...... sorry

@goldfish- thank you 🙂 I agree it's disrespectful to both parties.

Obviously I notice attractive people just as much as the next person but I'm not going to gawk in front of my partner. It would not only be hurtful to him, but also make me look bad to be doing that with my partner.

@fox- my moon is Aqua and my Venus Sag 🙂

Posted by MissAquarious
Also @jeane- I'm not coming from a place of trying to control his behavior ... But by letting him know this hurts me givings him the opportunity to notice and change his behavior if he wishes. If it continues or gets worse then I know I've said my peace and I can deal with it or not

but it is control. you want to control his behaviour (or want him to control his behaviour) because you can't control your insecurity. the thing is, it is easier to control him than yourself so you choose that instead.

my point is, not that this issue is invalid, it's just that these things build. in isolation it doesn't look harmful but as these things accumulate? are you going to use the card "i'm hurt" every time he does something you don't approve of? what about when he talks to someone? smiles at them just that little bit too long? laughs a little bit too loud? are you going to be hurt then? will he have to stop going places? seeing people? having certain friends?

like pandora suggested, rather than controlling him, you need to ask why something so innocent as him looking at a person, upsets you so much? why does then begin to question his loyalty to you? why does it then lead to "if you're doing that to my face, what are you doing behind my back?"

Posted by MissAquarious
@goldfish- thank you 🙂 I agree it's disrespectful to both parties.

Obviously I notice attractive people just as much as the next person but I'm not going to gawk in front of my partner. It would not only be hurtful to him, but also make me look bad to be doing that with my partner.

is he gawking or looking? is he checking someone out or ogling? this seems to be changing.

Posted by jeane

Posted by MissAquarious
Also @jeane- I'm not coming from a place of trying to control his behavior ... But by letting him know this hurts me givings him the opportunity to notice and change his behavior if he wishes. If it continues or gets worse then I know I've said my peace and I can deal with it or not

but it is control. you want to control his behaviour (or want him to control his behaviour) because you can't control your insecurity. the thing is, it is easier to control him than yourself so you choose that instead.

my point is, not that this issue is invalid, it's just that these things build. in isolation it doesn't look harmful but as these things accumulate? are you going to use the card "i'm hurt" every time he does something you don't approve of? what about when he talks to someone? smiles at them just that little bit too long? laughs a little bit too loud? are you going to be hurt then? will he have to stop going places? seeing people? having certain friends?

like pandora suggested, rather than controlling him, you need to ask why something so innocent as him looking at a person, upsets you so much? why does then begin to question his loyalty to you? why does it then lead to "if you're doing that to my face, what are you doing behind my back?"

click to expand

not that this issue isn't* valid...

@jeane- potato/potaaaato... Looking to long is gawking to me.

Different things make people insecure. And this is a new thing. He and I have been together almost a year and a half. I have every right to question this new behavior and tell him about anything that hurts me. I expect him to tell me if I'm hurting him. If not, then I may never know. That kind of thing leads to resentment.

I think it's best to tell your partner if they're hurting you so they can choose to change it. If they don't then you have to decide what you want to do

Posted by MissAquarious
@jeane- potato/potaaaato... Looking to long is gawking to me.

Different things make people insecure. And this is a new thing. He and I have been together almost a year and a half. I have every right to question this new behavior and tell him about anything that hurts me. I expect him to tell me if I'm hurting him. If not, then I may never know. That kind of thing leads to resentment.

I think it's best to tell your partner if they're hurting you so they can choose to change it. If they don't then you have to decide what you want to do

i don't know whether you are intentionally missing the point on not. i'll make it obvious - the point is, why would something so insignificant hurt you? are you a fragile little flower?

Posted by Pandora101

Posted by Goldfish
But if his behaviour makes her hurt and disrespected she needs to say this to him.
OP I think you did the right thing.

When I'm with someone I really don't have time or energy to notice other men. I make a concious effort not to let my eyes wander because I think it's disrespectful to everyone involved. I look when I'm alone and I don't look at people who have their partners with them and avoid their eyes too.
But if the Bull sees nothing wrong with looking around and ignores my wishes I will make him feel exactly what I feel by looking and attracting other men just to prove my point. See how he copes
...

Funnily enough when I'm with him the lesbians throw themselves at me, I don't get it! He even "jokingly " brought up the 3some talk because of it which I sharply replied: "fine, who's is the other man?" Because I'm not attracted to feminine energy and I actually like penis. I told him if he wants to do an orgy, 3some or whatever he can go and have fun but don't expect me to be part of it or take him seriously afterwards......

goldfish, can we get an update on your situation please, in another forum? so you dont give advice what you dont follow internally...... sorry

click to expand

Seriously? 🙂

@jeane- I would argue that you're pointing out other women's assets so it "loses it's appeal" because you're insecure about this issue. Why try to make looking at other attractive people lose it's appeal if you're secure with your man looking?

I'm secure enough to say- I don't like this. I have more respect for myself than to have my man checking out other women when we're together. This does not make me a fragile flower but instead a woman who knows herself and has self respect

Who is your kinda woman? Lol

Omg that corn looks awesome! Haha! I'm just about to head to a farmers market that sells it... Yummmm!!

As a Taurus guy I'm sure you have a better idea than just someone who will put up with you?

@busyeyes- geez! I'm just here trying to figure this out. First of all... He and I have both gained about 20 lbs since we've been together. I love to cook and he loves to eat. Secondly... It was hard enough typing that but I'm trying to put myself out there and assume some of the responsibility. You really don't need to pounce like that. I still don't think that when a woman gains weight it gives her man the go ahead to check out women in front of her.

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by Goldfish
But if his behaviour makes her hurt and disrespected she needs to say this to him.
OP I think you did the right thing.

When I'm with someone I really don't have time or energy to notice other men. I make a concious effort not to let my eyes wander because I think it's disrespectful to everyone involved. I look when I'm alone and I don't look at people who have their partners with them and avoid their eyes too.
But if the Bull sees nothing wrong with looking around and ignores my wishes I will make him feel exactly what I feel by looking and attracting other men just to prove my point. See how he copes
...

Funnily enough when I'm with him the lesbians throw themselves at me, I don't get it! He even "jokingly " brought up the 3some talk because of it which I sharply replied: "fine, who's is the other man?" Because I'm not attracted to feminine energy and I actually like penis. I told him if he wants to do an orgy, 3some or whatever he can go and have fun but don't expect me to be part of it or take him seriously afterwards......

Wow! I.don't think your bull would bring up a 3some even in a joke if he thought your relationship was long term. No man has ever said that to me even in jest!!! Alarm bells ringing there already!!! I wouldn't invest too much with yr taurus if I were you.

click to expand

I know right?! And that's why I'm kind of holding back. He "joked" two or three times and I was clear saying that I wasn't judging him or criticising him but I have no interest in doing it. He can go, do it, have fun and probably lose me but no hard feelings as long as he is honest.
Funny thing is: he got all defensive when I was losing my inhibitions in bed last time and didn't even go down on me and then brought up the 3some butter....I'm like "Dude, you can't handle only me how you gonna handle more girls on your bed at the same time!?!
Seriously.
I'm really starting to think it's better to let the whole thing fizzle out and find a nice Scorpion who lives nearby and can give me the attention I need.

Sorry OP for hijacking your thread.

We have a wandering eye. It's not an issue if the preson is into you. We can look at others but will never leave you if we care.

Posted by MissAquarious
@jeane- I would argue that you're pointing out other women's assets so it "loses it's appeal" because you're insecure about this issue. Why try to make looking at other attractive people lose it's appeal if you're secure with your man looking?

I'm secure enough to say- I don't like this. I have more respect for myself than to have my man checking out other women when we're together. This does not make me a fragile flower but instead a woman who knows herself and has self respect

let's look at reality - i have a partner who told me (without prompting) that he only wants to look at me and you have a partner who gawks and stares and ogles other women to the point where you have to berate him to stop. who has the insecurity here?

you are a woman who knows herself so well you have to ask strangers on the internet how to deal with a relationship issue. yeah, that makes sense.

Yes! And some even keep a herd......

@jeane- ummmmmm... I didn't berate him at all. I told him my feelings and he apologized.

And last time I checked we're all on here together to ask for advice or give it. Or are you just here to criticize?

Posted by MissAquarious
@jeane- ummmmmm... I didn't berate him at all. I told him my feelings and he apologized.

And last time I checked we're all on here together to ask for advice or give it. Or are you just here to criticize?

i am giving it. you're just too ignorant to appreciate it. oh hang on, woman who knows her own mind who has to have people tell her how to feel...sorry. my mistake.

Arent you just getting over an obstacle with him, and now he presents another?
Ugh. He seems difficult.

Posted by MissAquarious
@jeane- I would argue that you're pointing out other women's assets so it "loses it's appeal" because you're insecure about this issue. Why try to make looking at other attractive people lose it's appeal if you're secure with your man looking?

I'm secure enough to say- I don't like this. I have more respect for myself than to have my man checking out other women when we're together. This does not make me a fragile flower but instead a woman who knows herself and has self respect

and i don't point it out "so that it loses it's appeal". he can look all day long if he wants. i don't care. he just chooses not to because, why?

but your guy now has to think about averting his eyes every time he is out with you. what is he going to be like when you're not there? it's going to be a free for all. he is look and stare and get his fill because he knows when he is back with you again it's going to be eyes forward at all times.

Posted by idk

Posted by jeane

Posted by MissAquarious
@jeane- ummmmmm... I didn't berate him at all. I told him my feelings and he apologized.

And last time I checked we're all on here together to ask for advice or give it. Or are you just here to criticize?

i am giving it. you're just too ignorant to appreciate it. oh hang on, woman who knows her own mind who has to have people tell her how to feel...sorry. my mistake.

sounds like you were all over trying to tell her how to feel a couple pages back.

click to expand

i was but she says she is a woman who knows her own mind so doesn't need telling how to feel and yet, we have this thread where she asks people to tell her how she should feel.

Posted by idk

Posted by lnana04
Arent you just getting over an obstacle with him, and now he presents another?
Ugh. He seems difficult.

maybe.... that's why i'm all about the door. it's right there, most of the time

click to expand

Too bad he's not. He can walk through it since it seems he basically stays at her house.

I get the impression sometimes some Taurus males are afraid of smooth sailing. According to the OP he basically decided to pick up a new grating behavior overnight...probably just because she put her foot down on their last issue. As if he's going to make sure theres some kind of tension.

My Bull is really overweight and I love his body and his personality and his confidence. I just love him the way he is. I take him as he comes.
I am an attractive woman, fit and healthy too, everyone says it: other women (even heterosexual ones), other men, homosexual men....
It's not excuse for me to have a wondering eye. Even now in a LTR, I look when I'm alone but I don't flirt.
It is disrespectful in MY opinion.

And when I say overweight I mean around 200lb
I've never asked exactly how much he weighs

Thank you @goldfish. I agree! And geez I'm not even that overweight anyway.

I only started this thread asking is it typical for Bulls to do this. Since I talked to him he may realize what he was doing and stop doing it. I think it's better than me just ignoring it

Posted by Jaxonjax
I'm a Taurus and I have a wandering eye.. We just admire beauty but I'm incredibly faithful to my Leo

What does "incredibly" faithfu man..? How are you exceptionally faithful? Do tell..

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by lnana04

Posted by idk

Posted by lnana04
Arent you just getting over an obstacle with him, and now he presents another?
Ugh. He seems difficult.

maybe.... that's why i'm all about the door. it's right there, most of the time

Too bad he's not. He can walk through it since it seems he basically stays at her house.

I get the impression sometimes some Taurus males are afraid of smooth sailing. According to the OP he basically decided to pick up a new grating behavior overnight...probably just because she put her foot down on their last issue. As if he's going to make sure theres some kind of tension.

She put on 20lb in weight and now she is Blaming him!!! Once she stops cooking and eating he will stop "looking"!! It's her issues not his. But when aquas are in a relationship with taurus they like to try and control instead of fixing their own insecurities. It lies with her insecurities. If she is not happy with the taurus she should dump him and move on. If not she should fix herself up and stop moaning.

click to expand

And? She said he put on weight too and you don't gain 20lbs overnight. This is new behavior, according to the OP. Again, an example of difficult behavior. So since she's put on weight, it's acceptable for him to look at others in an attempt to passive aggressively control the situation by getting her to either lose weight, or deal with it.

Meanwhile, if she develops a wandering eye all h@ll breaks loose, and I'm sure not just with him. I could only imagine the comments on here too.

Thank you @Inana! That other girl is getting killed by her cheating post (I mean, I agree she shouldn't have cheated) but here I am getting charged with gaining 20 lbs! As we all know... Bulls love to eat good food. And I'm a damn good cook. We both gained the weight together. I've heard that often happens with couples.

But instead of playing games I just confronted him. My only question was is this typical bull behavior. And I know my bull notices everything! And I've seen his little jealous side come out at me when I'm on the phone with my mom or texting a friend. "Who is that?" "Who were you texting?" But it really doesn't bother me because I'm completely faithful and fine with letting him know. Maybe that's another reason why this hurts like it does?

Yes @lento! That is how it feels. Like- "yeah I'd fuck her".

Yes, Bulls notice everything. Of course he will notice another beautiful human being, but look at it at the point of making you uncomfortable it's not nice at all. I wish you all the best and hopefully he will realised how stupid he has been.
Remember what you want and what you deserve. There is always someone out there who can give it to you.

Posted by AndsAcquisitions
i do not.

...like what's the point if my gf is attractive plus she is mine?

off topic but.....
OMG how cute is your stupid profile pic Ands?! ;-P

i am simply attracted to beauty in all ways... i appreciate beauty in inanimate objects, men and women alike.... but there is a difference in looking and appreciating, and oogling lol
i will on occasion make a comment about general appreciation for beauty of people when with my partner, but never about lustfully wanting them yuck
i guess i just do really feel its about perspective and intentons.

I've had just a lightbulb moment thanks to busyeyes
Next time I'm with the Bull I will make a concious effort to look extra good and attract a few men and see what he does.
OP I suggest the same

Cheers, goldfish! Lol

But I'm not good at looking "hot" that's why I had issues with the tacky Facebook lady.
Even though I have a good body I cover it all up and I wear comfortable shoes because I love to walk.
My posture and movements are feminine and I have a pretty face but I don't look or behave sexy in any way and maybe that's what the Bull miss and wants....even though he says he likes natural beauty best.
At least that's what my Aquarius ex wanted me to look like (sexy like a porn star) and that's one of the reasons why he is an ex
@BusyEyes not saying you are this type maybe I'm too conservative and don't know how to be inbetween.