I'm lonely

I'm very resistant to love, it seems no girls that I like would even look at me, and it's finally starting to bother the hell out of me. Is anyone else out there alone and cant seem to change that? If not, give me advice, I hate this, I'm in my own personal hell.

HELLO....
HMMMMM you don't sound very optimistic....The first question i want to ask you "why do you think the girl you will like, wouldn't like you?"
i guess thinking that way you setting yourself for failure right on the spot.
Listen we all humans and we have our own flows-nobody is perfect. Still we also unique in our own way, that;s way some of you qualities,your look,the way you talk or smile are unique----there nobody else the same as you.
One more question is it about your phisic? Truly i'm in love with my "sweet pea" not because of his broad shoulders etc, because of who he is! Plus how he makes me feel.All of my friends are beautifull for me -because the are...I'm pretty sure that you are very nice person ,,so maybe you need to start Love yourself ,FOR WHO YOU ARE!
Only when you love yourself you'll be ready to share your uniqness with somebody you like to be with,,,and make them feel loved and unique.....
By the way if you feel that way because of somebodys comments, you need to ignore that: some people tend to quick judgment or their some who feel good "getting somebody down"
Don't be fool,,,,enjoy yourself----head up !
Aqua 2

One more thing:
Sometimes when we doubt ourselves we doubt feelings we feel.
It is not easy to love.
But if you try,
If you erase doubts in your heart
In your soul,
You'll get a gift....
The one that have no cost;
It hard to trust sometimes,
It hard to believe...
But if you'll let it in
You will get a wings...

Believe in yourself,never your beauty.
Maybe you picked wrong girls, maybe you missread their response, but the last thing you can do is to destroy your belief , your craving for Love....
It is not easy sometimes(but who said life is easy, or fair)
Once again it is up to you :how you see it....sometimes the real winner , is the person who know how to lose...
I truly believe that you real love is ahead....
Cheers take care....
Aqua 2.
I loved you..
Maybe my love is still alive in my soul
But don't let it bother you.
Cause i don't want it to disturbe you.
i loved you
Silently,without hope
Sometimes bieng jelous or bieng shy.
I loved you so sincere, so tender.
How i wish you to be loved by somebody else.

( i tried to make close translation from russian)
A,S,Pushkin.

it should be
Never doubt your beauty..

Aqua 2

Aqua 2,

Tonight you are making me both laugh and cry! I don't understand your poem or your words!!! Although they are beautifully written, it is haunting me!
Why do you wish for someone else to love what is meant for you?
What is meant for you is yours and no one else. Unless I miss understood you. Love will have it's own say and we are not to stand in the way!

This poem bieng written by Pushkin back to 18 century, i tried to translate is as close , as possible,,,,,he loved her, but she didn;t . she was involved witth other man.
He dedicated that poem to her,,,,wishing the other man to love her as stron as he does,,,,,,or did.....

Aqya 2,,,,don't cry,,love it the "gym" for the soul...

stron= strong
Aqua 2

Where is spell checker—??

Aqua2,

What do you mean by the 'gym', is this some kind of a work out— yes, I am getting one trying to keep up with you! Why don't you tell that man of yours what you tell us here on this board and he would probably give the high hard one!? hell if I had a d*** I would give it to you. I think your stuff is beautiful. Love doesn't have to feel bad! Find someone who appreciates you. You have captured my heart with your writing! I hope you dump that jerk and fall madly and passionatley in love!

Why couldn't he love her himself?

Exactly,nothing can stand on the way if it is Love.....
but by other fairtale,,,,,sometimes it takes centuries, few soulrebirth in a human body before you can be with your truth love,,,,even if it feel like you found it, there could be barriers,,,
Nobody know the real story or how it happenning,,,,,only faith and lovefeeling in our hearts,,,,the fair that always warm us and our soul up....

Sorry if it sound too pessimistic,,,,but we got to believe in better,,,,,so never gave up, sometimes it will hurt as any other life expirience that neded transformation of some kind: but reward is Big.....

Aqua 2

No, I am wishing you to find some peace. your heart is obviously in turmoil and I hope it doesn't stay that way! Love doesn't have to hurt so much, does it?

on the question
why he can't love her himself


, because she loved somebody else,,,,,and he was wise to understand that he can't make her love him(love don't take violence or force) so he found somebody who fell in love with him,,,,and slowly he learned how to return that feeling, almost made it mutual to woman who loved and adored him..

Aqua2

about "gym" - yes that kind that make you soul expand......and your heart also.....

Aqua 2

About love,,,,,yes sometimes it hurts,,,,,i just was posting somebody elses poems- it doesn't mean tha i'm hurt so much,,,,
i do feel a little bit unappreciated , but as i said i'm going to be the one who will gave up on him, partly cause if i do that it would be backstabbing for him,,,,,last thing i want to do is to hurt him,,,,,lol
If it will bi it will be more civil, we never be friends, but now is not exactly is a moment to bring it on,,,i'll wait a couple of days,,,,
I just can't explain all situation here,,but i know what i do,,,,,plus with advices from people like ML,TM and others it is almost like i have them by my side,,,,,,,lol
It is like in a poem, if not me, i wish the next person to be such trustworthy and love him as me,,,,,,,lol


Love you ,,,,,BYE

Aqua 2

the one who will gave up = the last person who will gave up on him.....

Aqua 2

why do love hurt sometimes or make our soul expand,,,,,because we learning how to be less selfish ,less egocentered,,,,,,because love is 50/50.....thou everybody saing it , not everybody undrestand it,,,,,than is strat to sound like" i did that,,,,,and he didn't do this" or " he said that, i thought that, and i did this"
it is - besides your own opinion or decision , you also consider the one that you other half have.....

Well why don't you tell him all this beuatiful stuff you share with us, perhaps he is confused as to your feelings!

I have said this before and I know it is true; some people like to create pain and drama in their lives because it is better to feel SOMETHING THAN NOTHING AT ALL! Even if he turned you down you would know you left with your head up and did everything right. That is not losing. It is winning!

LS/C

you=your

Aqua 2

And you are using the situation to create another one which I think is dishonest!! No, he will not be loved by the next one because all you have done in my opinion is create bigger walls. You may be feeling you are underappreciated, but if you were giving love for only loves sake then you wouldn't expect anything in return. Maybe they would have returned it eventually, but it wouldn't be on your schedule! How sad to just throw so much feeling away! NEXT!!!!

and I am crying! I can't stop!!!

Aqua2:

You are right, we are all with you, Hun.
I think that Taurus of yours will not like the thought of losing you, but it seems your love is not being cherished.
Too bad he just doesn't "wake up".

You will be just fine, of that I have not doubt. I leave you this poem.(wrote this one myself)

The Black hole of Love

Beware of the Black hole of love
The endless abyss
Where your love, romance, and affections
Vanish from the light of above
You have experienced one
If you have given love not returned...
When the firey passions from your heart
Have found a fuel that will not burn.
It is playing a tune for the deaf
Or starting a fire with a wet match,
When the object of your affections
Remains an egg that will not hatch.
Fear not, if your love is noble from the heart,
A willing partner will recognise it from the very start.
Above all, do not scorn whomever rejects
it,
For you can not force love upon any
Who choose not to accept it.

Taurus Male

I don't see what you find so funny about it either. After every sentences is a (lol?) Seems to me, like maybe you are enjoying yourself— Don't ever think that you are in control of anything because you are not! Whatever is right and true will shine through and what ever else is nothing at all!

TM :
for now it seems that you the only one who knoe the whole story,,,almost.
I remember you since i syrted posting here,
Your poem is wondefull i'm going to put it in my notebook(by :TM) lol
abou others yes, i expected that posts, but hey maybe you are right somehow, maybe he missreaded my signals, and i'm his, cause we just hit the wall recently- but don't judge becasu you wouldn't love to be gudged!!!!!!
AND all stories seem to be the same but the all different,,,,and maybe Love is the only thing where you can't be 100% sur untill u spelled it, that what i'm doing right now.....

Cheers
Aqua 2

I think there are those who can never know it, and even if they do it will never ever be enough! Until they suck the very life out of the one they say they love!

lol= i'm trying to cheer myself up, so cross it out for youself,,,,,the lines a all(almost) about him, a nd when i thinhk of him, his face he make me laugh,,,,,,he do,,,,,he do a lot of things(and me for him) to make life feel easy, uncomplicated,light....
The touch,,,,the way i make him breakfast , the way he eats it, keeping me on his knees and feeding me,,,,it is intimate so sorry to automaticly push lol....

Aqua 2

No wonder you aren't getting anywhere who the hell can understand you!

I'M NOT IN CONTROL,,,,,and i mentiomed it before,,,,and if you thimk that with your post you'll get me down,,,,,it is a big mistake,,,,,
and till now i was kind to me, maybe because i 'm not a quick judge to others, or i'm trying to be kind & sincere,,,,,i have my rules(till now they never were cosidered as wrong by others)i know what i worth.....never sttled for less- but love have no rules and i'l take them with my head up , open heart.....(still i'll be fighting for what i feel)

Aqua 2

p.s i'm not impossing that rules on others, they are for me,,,,the way i feel life,,,,it doesn't mean the are right,or wrong,,,,but i don't feel that i cheat somebody or myself,,,,,

just if your next post going to be on this...
and mention your name or sign next time,just curious.....

Aqua 2

I'm sorry that was rude! You just seem to be feelin sorry for youself. are you takin to the wind or are you for real?

Hey buddy:

You go to a Russian Board and see who in the hell understands you. (Smart ass)

TM

to mr or miss 64.....
On a question where i'm heading,,,,,
I have some achievments,,,,i'm not going mention them here,,,,what for,,,,advertising is the other way,,,,
But i guess i won a lot , thanx to people like you,,,,quick to judge , quick to give up,,,,
Ithink it is better to love and feel tha n don't , so somebody with the sanme trats gave up on him at the most important moment of his life, and they been fully aware,,,= distroyed his trust, his faith to love,,,,,
I'VE been there, done that,,,in em ergency call 1800- been-there-done-that.
Guess what i was thae one to help him rebiuld it,,,,and yes his feelings sometimes more important than mine,,,but it is from "Love can't depend on give_take rule all the time, cause it will look like i gave you 5 candies , you gave me none",,it is giving and hareing along the way,,anyway you'll recieve what you gave, maybe not now,,,,you can't demand,,,,actually you do,,,,up to situation and selfishness and childish behviour,,,,,anyway situation can be different,,,,as can be love,,,,that what i have,,,,i need ,,,,,,i want,,,feel comfartable with,,,,,
Anyway i'm glad to recieve your responds,,post your story next time and maybe instead of judgments post yout love advice,,,,,

Aqua 2

Go ahead and let it all out! I am not judging anyone! Just listening and learning.

Let love be genuine!

Yes your rules, but love abides by none!

Love suffers long and is kind.

It doesn't make a difference what sign I am; I am a human being like everybody else. We are all the same!

i don't feel sorry for myself,,,
if it because of the poem,,,,i just had it my mind before,,,and i translated it,,it is about not mutual love,,,,but it is not about me,,i just thought it is beautifull and sometimes in life it happens,,,,life is unpredictable thing,,,,,,you know,,,,,

TM,,,,how is your evening so far,,,,,,glad you showed up,,,,,
how is srars above the small texas city?
enjoy,,,take care...sweet person.
by-bye,,,,
Aqua 2

You are funny mr, Human.....
Yes love have no rules, i wasn't talking about love rules,,,,,i've been talking about rules that we sometimes abide in life,,,,,social rules,,,,so i have my own for myself....
Like if i date somebody , idon't date other people,,,it's a long list -romance, life,,,,,,bieng by my own since 17, without parents,,,,you expirience life ia whole variety, so you know what can hurt you and you know what should you avoid not to hurt others....
Other questions?

Aqya 2

ia = in

Aqua 2

I don't have it to spare. It is always in demand. Give because you feel like it not because you expect anything to fill you up. If so you will be empty and turned to dust. Love is not charity. It is suppose to be from the heart. Give and expect nothing in return.

I was mocking and yes, I can understand you and I have been in the same place. We really can't depend on anyone to give us anything. We can only do that for ourself. If we our lucky we may see it returned and if not then we did the right thing.

and no...I have no questions! Except one, what would satisfy your heart?

sorry i posted thatpost about sharing in rush,,,,,after example was supposed to be that love is sharing without rules,,and then lines about some people expectin return right away,,,,,and then lines about what i feel , i need etc,,,,,,next time will be more carefull and will check it before posting

Aqua 2

exactly that what i was saying,,,,but some people waitig for a return,,,,it is not a routine it is a relationship between two,

Aqua 2
on the sharing thing

I guess that is too easy and straigtforward to answer!!!

Ah, relationships? That is depending on someone else! Not any easy thing to do! You would think so, but we don't always get back what we invest into it. Is that a reason not to keep giving? Maybe! I chose not to think of it as tit for tat but to give of myself not to get but because by giving makes me feel more alive!

What will satisfy my heart.....
I feel comlete,,satisfied,,,,just a little bit of appreciation ,undrestanding ,affection (that all what i've been missing recently)from him would me keep there,by his side and as i said anyway i will be the last person to hurt him, or to live him hurt or to gave up on him.....maybe because he got quilities that he have no idea about and because i do love him,,,(love him to ,,when others tell me i'm beautifull or flirting with me i'm automaticly compare them to him,,and i can't see other males cute or attractive cause WITH BIG LETTERS HIS NAME ON MY HEART AND MIND, and if i'll bail out i think it wil take some time before i'll look at somebody.)

Aqua 2

What would it take to make you feel appreciated and understood? And if that was met would you feel better? And affection, could be if he told you how much he cared or he loved you? Maybe he does and he has a different way of expressing it, not like yours but just as pure? Does it have to be derived; can it be his own way and his own time? All the expectations can kill what love you have started and there is no reason you can't make it through this if you love one another. Try and work it out. Sometimes it is little things like... I am thinking of you, or to send you a message or a poem or to say you worry about them or you miss them! It can't always be the sky is falling and the earth is shaking! Can it be simple?

mr, human


that what i do for pst 1.5 =giving,,,and don't feel sorry for it or counting,,,,,cause it do make me alive,,happy like a child,,,,,and maybe carefree when i see smile in respond,,,

Aqua 2,,,,maybe you got to go back like 1.5 and read all my posts,,,,cause sound like you are trying to pick on me—Bad day ,,,huh>? it will take a long to get me derailed-----i've been throu fire,water and hell,,,plainly spoken building my life here(in a foriegn country),,,,but i'm up to the challange!!!!!!

Aqua 2

is it something you loking that sound insencere or to proof that i felt sorrry for myself?

and if you are even considering those who flirt and come on to you then you are already distracted. Your heart isn't in it, not all the way! You are divided and he will be left to compete always for the number one position. That would be alot of pressure and no one can stand the pace and the distance, not forever. You can't keep running a horse race. Pick one and stay with it. You have to know what it is you want and then be prepared to live with it. This is a matter of maturity! Otherwise, go and sow your oats and keep looking for greener pastures. I can't be bothered running races anymore. I am not under anyones bit and I have been around the track enough times to know where the finish line is!

mr, human.....
listen i did ,,,,,,i tried and still sending my little sign of affection(cards,messages etc)...
Sound like you teaching me,,,,sorry but i'm with that man for some -some time and i know how he shows it,,,(a lot or few) i know the diffrence and i know how exactly he shows it.....but as i said recently we hit that missunderstanding, not fully communicating (kind half-silent)wall and i'm working on resolving it,,,,
That is it,,,end of story,,,,,

Any other advices? or maybe questions>?

Aqua 2

LISTEN everybody is flirting,,,,,by saying it i didn't mentioned responding,,,,i just think of him at that moments,,,,,
ohhhhh ;listen but i know more than enough (encluding happy mated alredy) who enjoy inocent flirting......

Aqua 2

mr, human


that what i do for pst 1.5 =giving,,,and don't feel sorry for it or counting,,,,,cause it do make me alive,,happy like a child,,,,,and maybe carefree when i see smile in respond,,,

Then what do you want? You still haven't said what it is specifically that bugs you so much! Once you figure it out then let him know! Geez, it is like pulling teeth with people! I think you need to figure out what it is you want in a relationship! Make a list of all the good things versus the bad and then see how it adds up! My own thoughts...maybe a little soul searching would help you out! Maybe you need to do a little digging and fill your own holes in and then look for someone grow with!

Sure love and soulmates exist , but for me my friends are my soulmates and love is a totaly different kind of "connection".
... every since the day we met,
this feeling always been the same.
every single bit of my heart
still softly whispers your name.....

....when i'm not been able to know
the feelings that you feel,,,,
just make me wonder,
if your love is for real?
i want you to show me
all the love inside of you.
i want you to tell me,
how much you love me,
how much you've missed my smile.
and make me feel high in the sky,
so no one can ever touch me.....

......the doors to your heart are locked
and i can't get inside
but why? i just want to see
all that you won't express.
i want to see what makes you happy
and why sometimes you look depressed.
please hear me out,
and give me a chance.
then maybe i'll now what you feel
with just one glance........

......i close my eyes
and almost hear your voice.
i wan't so much to be with you,
this i can't disguise.
i miss you you my "sweet pea",
i miss your brown eyes.
is it the comfort that you bring?
your arms around me tight?
your kisses on my lips?,,,,,
,,,for now i lay alone
and have to make it through the night
until one morning when i wake up,
and see you there,,,,by my side......

Aqua 2,,,,everybody enjoy your evening and stay cool
and i got about 25 of it, not corrected,but almost book all about him....Question is,,,,,i didn't got what was your point of postin your messages,,,,,sound like i was the one asking to help me to figure out what was the problem,,,in case if you thought that i'm the originall poster you are wrong,,,,about what and how i alredy figured out(thanx to TM, ML,,, OTHERS) AND AS I SAIND I'M WORKING ON IT...and i didn't asked you to pull my teeth out!!!!!! Your interst been appreciated , but i missid your point.

Cheers
Aqua 2

By the way did the list thing work out for you?/ truly tried it before, some time ago,,,,but heart don't want to listen sometimes,,,,and the stupidest thing is rationalize it.....Though you can gain control in certain areas , but look befire you never in control.....

Aqua 2