My codependency...

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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Makes him feel "loved "?

Well it makes me feel like a psychopath and pathetic.

Is this typical of Taurus men? Do you not care if a woman wants to be with you 24/7 and do everything for You?

I'm trying to battle this head on and he knows it, but to an extent he's enabling.

He knows it's unhealthy but he also says it makes him feel loved....i need him to tell me to piss off!
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by DefineTruth

Why not just piss off yourself without prompting from him?

Well were in a relatio ship and I love him. It is a relationship I wanna be in it, but I want to be my best self in it so im working on it.

I can't tell myself to miss off...becasue of my dependency issues. I have major panic attacks and I become immobilized to an extent. It a really an awful condition. I have my good days and bad days of course. Yeaterday being bad. But I'm like 60% good 40 bad rn, which for me is good.

I just need him to say "bitch imma leave you if you keep acting a fool" scare me straight ya know, even if he doesn't mean it.
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HeavyEntertainmentShow
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
8 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 4555 · Posts: 7614 · Topics: 100
I'll say it for ya.

Image Not Found

In all seriousness, the best way you can remedy the situation is to put some distance between the two of you for a little bit. Even a week. I have the same problem with my boy, in that perhaps I love him too much. And he is like your Bull, he loves the attention (Leo-dominant). The more I give him, the more he wants. And it took something quite drastic to make us make changes.

I took the opportunity while I was recently recovering from an assault to ask for some space. I was gonna move back to my place for a little bit but he said I was in no condition to do anything like that so he went to visit some friends out of town for about a week. It gave me the chance to wrap my head around everything, get a hold of my overwhelming emotions & become familiar with "me" time again. Not that he made it easy, texted me at least once a day and sent me a pouty selfie from the beach at sunrise that he likes to watch. But we needed some breathing space and it helped us understand each other better.

You guys need some breathing space too. If he genuinely loves you, he'll understand that this is something that will be good for you. And he needs to learn that the world does not revolve around him.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShow

I'll say it for ya.

Image Not Found

In all seriousness, the best way you can remedy the situation is to put some distance between the two of you for a little bit. Even a week. I have the same problem with my boy, in that perhaps I love him too much. And he is like your Bull, he loves the attention (Leo-dominant). The more I give him, the more he wants. And it took something quite drastic to make us make changes.

I took the opportunity while I was recently recovering from an assault to ask for some space. I was gonna move back to my place for a little bit but he said I was in no condition to do anything like that so he went to visit some friends out of town for about a week. It gave me the chance to wrap my head around everything, get a hold of my overwhelming emotions & become familiar with "me" time again. Not that he made it easy, texted me at least once a day and sent me a pouty selfie from the beach at sunrise that he likes to watch. But we needed some breathing space and it helped us understand each other better.

You guys need some breathing space too. If he genuinely loves you, he'll understand that this is something that will be good for you. And he needs to learn that the world does not revolve around him.

Thank you for being able to relate. I told him last night I think we needed to take a break and his response was "whatever you need, I'll be here" so that was very reassuring, but I also say why take an actual break and not jus a day here and there and so I recanted my statements.

He went away to Florida last month for a week and it was good for me but then when he got back we spent like 3 weeks straight togther and I got use to a routine with him. His work week is changing and so our routein has to change and I'm not as flexible.

I need to get use to my alone time. I know it's good for me. Like the old adage "absence makes the heart grow fonder ". But it's like an addiction so sometimes it's hard just to do it. I take 3 steps forward and 4 back. It's annoying and exhausting.

But I want to prove him wrong/or right and be strong and do it. To prove myself and my worth
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Posted by DefineTruth

I think you need to ask yourself why this is an issue for you. Maybe once you look internally, you can come up with ways to de-cling.

I've always had issues, I just never realized it until this relationship (him being very independent) my past boyfriends were just as dependent as I, so I learned that this behavior is "normal".

It's weird becasue I know I should go, and I over stay my welcome. And there are things I want to/need to do, but I don't becasue I don't want to leave or be away from him.

The first step to moving past it is realization, then I just need to implement.

What I'm saying is (and what I've said to him) is he needs to sometimes tell me to go instead of "do whatever you want. You can stay or you can go " given those options 99.9% of the time I'm going to stay, but be restless becasue I know there are other things I need to do!

Baby steps...one of two days a week alone.and I'm going to try harder to just do things when I need to instead of putting them off.

So far that's what I got
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by -Apis-

How long have you guys been together now?

Are you scared hes gonna leave you?

Has he given you a reason to worry?

What do you get outta being so clingy?

Can he use the bathroom by himself?

I love the barrage of questions...

6 months

Yes, but he has not given me a reason to think that, other than my own deep rooted insecurities.

I get a headache and heart palpitations and anxiety/worry. We also just have so much fun and get a long so well. We keep eachtoher laughing and smiling the whole day. I'm just love the feels I get being around him.

Yes he can, but he prefers me to hold it sometimes
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

How long have you guys been together now?

Are you scared hes gonna leave you?

Has he given you a reason to worry?

What do you get outta being so clingy?

Can he use the bathroom by himself?

I love the barrage of questions...

6 months

Yes, but he has not given me a reason to think that, other than my own deep rooted insecurities.

I get a headache and heart palpitations and anxiety/worry. We also just have so much fun and get a long so well. We keep eachtoher laughing and smiling the whole day. I'm just love the feels I g7et being around him.

Yes he can, but he prefers me to hold it sometimes


Has he given you any inclination that he's tired of it?
click to expand


Yes he says "this can't keep happening. It's okay for now and I hope we can get past this. But if it's been a year ans it hasn't gotten better then idk, I'm afraid it's never going to stop. How about when we love together? Or I give you a ring? Will you still be paranoid and anxious?"....

i hope. It. But I'm unsure myself
Profile picture of Boots1313
Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

How long have you guys been together now?

Are you scared hes gonna leave you?

Has he given you a reason to worry?

What do you get outta being so clingy?

Can he use the bathroom by himself?

I love the barrage of questions...

6 months

Yes, but he has not given me a reason to think that, other than my own deep rooted insecurities.

I get a headache and heart palpitations and anxiety/worry. We also just have so much fun and get a long so well. We keep eachtoher laughing and smiling the whole day. I'm just love the feels I g7et being around him.

Yes he can, but he prefers me to hold it sometimes


Has he given you any inclination that he's tired of it?

Yes he says "this can't keep happening. It's okay for now and I hope we can get past this. But if it's been a year ans it hasn't gotten better then idk, I'm afraid it's never going to stop. How about when we love together? Or I give you a ring? Will you still be paranoid and anxious?"....

i hope. It. But I'm unsure myself


Do you ever go take time to just be alone or hangout with friends without him?
click to expand


Rarely...my friends are busy with their lives as well and I'm about 40 minutes away from them so it's hard to find time. On my day off (Mondays) i try to gwt together with them.

And only when he's working do I do my own thing. Otherwise it's me just distracting myself until I get a chance to be with him
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Black-Mamba

Yeah I've been there. Very unhealthy. Why you keep getting anxiety.

See a therapist. You are not doing yourself any favors

You have attachment issues

Also i would maybe read some books on topic there's tons

I understand loving a person and always wanting to be with them

But you give up alot by doing that and eventually your partner will take you for granted

Thank you for sympathizing.

Right now I don't have the financial means for a therapist (Hello dxp!) So that's pit of the question rn.

I have been reading things online. I know it's hindering me, and sadly this is a learned behavior from my past...even as far back as my parents and I being an only child.

Working on it, but it isn't always easy. I just really don't want my great relationship to be anymore effected than it already is
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Posted by Ellygant

A little bit of cling is actually not that’s bad, in general. Some people are more affectionate and enjoy close lives. That’s not bad in itself.

Where it becomes co dependent and unhealthy, is when you associate the relationship to your happiness and start treating it as the main or only source of fulfillment.

If you find happiness within yourself first then clinginess won’t taint the relationship. It’s just an affection style .

Involve him less in your taking space. You don’t need to announce it or take a formal break. Just start planning more things for yourself and do them. Tell him later when you catch up. It’s your process. Claim it.

Thank k you for the support and advice. That is very helpful!
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

How long have you guys been together now?

Are you scared hes gonna leave you?

Has he given you a reason to worry?

What do you get outta being so clingy?

Can he use the bathroom by himself?

I love the barrage of questions...

6 months

Yes, but he has not given me a reason to think that, other than my own deep rooted insecurities.

I get a headache and heart palpitations and anxiety/worry. We also just have so much fun and get a long so well. We keep eachtoher laughing and smiling the whole day. I'm just love the feels I g7et being around him.

Yes he can, but he prefers me to hold it sometimes


Has he given you any inclination that he's tired of it?

Yes he says "this can't keep happening. It's okay for now and I hope we can get past this. But if it's been a year ans it hasn't gotten better then idk, I'm afraid it's never going to stop. How about when we love together? Or I give you a ring? Will you still be paranoid and anxious?"....

i hope. It. But I'm unsure myself


Do you ever go take time to just be alone or hangout with friends without him?

Rarely...my friends are busy with their lives as well and I'm about 40 minutes away from them so it's hard to find time. On my day off (Mondays) i try to gwt together with them.

And only when he's working do I do my own thing. Otherwise it's me just distracting myself until I get a chance to be with him


So he's pretty much all you have?

Do you work?
click to expand


He the only thing I have that I fully enjoy.

I work yes, I'm not extremely happy with my job but I recently got a title change and I'm hoping with that comes some motivation and a new perspective on it.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by nakedgirlavalanche

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by nakedgirlavalanche

taurus men are clingy and love to be smothered and loved until they don't want it then they get all irritable

I'm afraid of the "until he doesn't want it" part...

as long as you treat them like kings which imo is tiresome they won't ,
click to expand



What if he says "you worship me like a god?"
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Black-Mamba

In the meantime think of cheap hobbies you can get into

You can make liquors, knit, read, maje candles, up your skills, learn a new language, get new certificates for work

The things one can do with their time is limitless

You have a house i see..

Do you like gardening

Your man is hot tho i can see why you cling so hard

I have a lot of hobbies, I usually do them often however I only can do it for like an hour before I get bored. Then I still have like 1r hours more in my day lol.

Take today for example. He's working 1pm until 9pm. I've been up since 445am.

Drove my friend to the airport, did laundry, drank 3 cups of coffee. Took care of my plants, did my artwork and now I'm on a pleasant stroll and it's just noon here. I can only fill my time with some much until I'm clawing at the walls. All my friends are unavailable today. I usually see them Mondays. And come like 5 or 6pm the anxiety kicks in. 😢

And yes he is very hot and just a beautiful soul. Thank you!
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Commodus

When I was a kid, I was prescribed meds for adhd. For a long time I've been skeptical of that diagnosis. Well I've snorted enough drugs now to be able to confirm to myself that I'm missing some brain receptors. I've always been high anxiety too and the high energy makes it worse. The only two things that will help you are xanax and nothing else short of watching him fuck another bitch jk. But seriously, distance probably wont help you. You can try it - why not. Just let him know exactly why which it sounds like you have. But I recommend seeing a psychologist. I've gone years trying to be sane without 50 million things running through my head at the same time and it hasnt worked out. Meds in this instance can make you feel like a normal person which is nice. And obviously, what youre experiencing is irrational fear because of your amygdala going beast mode.

Some say my amygdala, some say Virgo moon.

I hate chemicals and medication. I was on lexapro for a bit. Never took drugs except alcohol and pot. Pot seems to help.

I don't have insurance or financial means to see someone at. Just coping as I can.

Thanks for relating
Profile picture of Boots1313
Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

How long have you guys been together now?

Are you scared hes gonna leave you?

Has he given you a reason to worry?

What do you get outta being so clingy?

Can he use the bathroom by himself?

I love the barrage of questions...

6 months

Yes, but he has not given me a reason to think that, other than my own deep rooted insecurities.

I get a headache and heart palpitations and anxiety/worry. We also just have so much fun and get a long so well. We keep eachtoher laughing and smiling the whole day. I'm just love the feels I g7et being around him.

Yes he can, but he prefers me to hold it sometimes


Has he given you any inclination that he's tired of it?

Yes he says "this can't keep happening. It's okay for now and I hope we can get past this. But if it's been a year ans it hasn't gotten better then idk, I'm afraid it's never going to stop. How about when we love together? Or I give you a ring? Will you still be paranoid and anxious?"....

i hope. It. But I'm unsure myself


Do you ever go take time to just be alone or hangout with friends without him?

Rarely...my friends are busy with their lives as well and I'm about 40 minutes away from them so it's hard to find time. On my day off (Mondays) i try to gwt together with them.

And only when he's working do I do my own thing. Otherwise it's me just distracting myself until I get a chance to be with him


So he's pretty much all you have?

Do you work?

He the only thing I have that I fully enjoy.

I work yes, I'm not extremely happy with my job but I recently got a title change and I'm hoping with that comes some motivation and a new perspective on it.
click to expand


So any advice @-apis- looking at you Taurus male...
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by nakedgirlavalanche

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by nakedgirlavalanche

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by nakedgirlavalanche

taurus men are clingy and love to be smothered and loved until they don't want it then they get all irritable

I'm afraid of the "until he doesn't want it" part...

as long as you treat them like kings which imo is tiresome they won't ,


What if he says "you worship me like a god?"


I would ask him to worship me like a god also
click to expand


He does as well
Profile picture of Boots1313
Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

How long have you guys been together now?

Are you scared hes gonna leave you?

Has he given you a reason to worry?

What do you get outta being so clingy?

Can he use the bathroom by himself?

I love the barrage of questions...

6 months

Yes, but he has not given me a reason to think that, other than my own deep rooted insecurities.

I get a headache and heart palpitations and anxiety/worry. We also just have so much fun and get a long so well. We keep eachtoher laughing and smiling the whole day. I'm just love the feels I g7et being around him.

Yes he can, but he prefers me to hold it sometimes


Has he given you any inclination that he's tired of it?

Yes he says "this can't keep happening. It's okay for now and I hope we can get past this. But if it's been a year ans it hasn't gotten better then idk, I'm afraid it's never going to stop. How about when we love together? Or I give you a ring? Will you still be paranoid and anxious?"....

i hope. It. But I'm unsure myself


Do you ever go take time to just be alone or hangout with friends without him?

Rarely...my friends are busy with their lives as well and I'm about 40 minutes away from them so it's hard to find time. On my day off (Mondays) i try to gwt together with them.

And only when he's working do I do my own thing. Otherwise it's me just distracting myself until I get a chance to be with him


So he's pretty much all you have?

Do you work?

He the only thing I have that I fully enjoy.

I work yes, I'm not extremely happy with my job but I recently got a title change and I'm hoping with that comes some motivation and a new perspective on it.

So any advice @-apis- looking at you Taurus male...


Me personally I'm not a fan of women who always want to be with me. Not that I dont enjoy spending time with them, but I feel obligated to them. Almost as if I have to cut short what I'm doing in order to make sure they're happy, just gets old after a while.

If he hasn't given you a reason to feel insecure, it sounds like it doesnt really bother him he just wants to see you get secure, and you hate the feeling of doing it, you just need to relax some (I know it's easier said than done) and fill your time with other things (hobbies arent the best at occupying your mind with these things, I dont think, because you arent obligated to do them, you can stop at anytime and your mind never gets off what was making you anxious while doing them).

Do you write? I know a lot of people who write for this very reason. It helps them get out every they feel when they feel it, but almost changes their behavior after seeing it in black and white. They can own it better.

You guys are fairly new together so wanting to be around each other all the time is kinda normal I think. Burnout is what will get ya if you're around each other all the time. Or losing yourself.
click to expand


First off I'm shocked you gave honest helpful advice and not just trolling and/or a funny comment. Thank you.

And yes, everything you said is fact.

I've been trying to write lately...hand cramping seems to get me.

He isn't per say bothered yet. He keeps saying it really isn't a big deal. But I just want to for myself be healthier mentally, and yes burn out is a real concern of mine.

I let him do his hobbies when we are togther nd as he's doing his i do mine. He playa poano, i draw and paint. He playa his video games I play mine. I go to bed early and he stays up playing them. I never don't let him do his thing. He knows me being with him makes me happy and sets me at ease. He find a it cute most of the time. I just find myself to be pathetic and lame becasue of it
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SagittariusXO
@sagittariusxo
8 YearsSagittarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 455 · Topics: 38
im this way with my bull. i don't feel codependent but its because i recognize that i could get that way and resist.

granted i don't live with my Taurus. we spend weekends together and mayby 2-3 day together during the week.

i never restrict him or make him feel restricted in the relationship even tho, internally i have a little separation anxity when i know he is free but choosing to do other things. such as, "im going to go grab a beer with so and so, or going to go to NYC to see so and so" i mean of couse i want to be included but i know it best that i take space for myself to do my own things that i put off when im with him and i think it makes the trust this work better because he knows i trust him, he never has to feel as if he can do things without me, and for the most part he always chooses to do things with me, Same team.

its only really ever hard at night, when you just want to cuddle them or wake up next to them. but im sure i will have the rest of my life for that. so i just go thru the negative emotions and let it be done with.

and for the most part, bulls love the affirmative attention so when we are together it is very affectionate and loving and cheesy.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Posted by tino

I guess most people have already covered points and solutions for this specific situation you're having here. But I think 2 more won't hurt right? :")

- Never threaten a Taurus man that you're going to leave him, cause he will let you go one way or another. My friend's boyfriend threatened her a couple of times, and love slowly died inside of her until she (taurus) reached the threshold and end up being the one leaving him. Which was rare since Tauruses are hardly a sign leaving anyone.

- Taurus, like all zodiacs, needs a time-out desperately. To them it's not about refreshing their internal world like Pisces, but they need to take things slowly and predictably, so giving them time to process and wonder, and perhaps feeling more in control of things would be nice. They tend to love the relaxing mode of the rship.

We're both taurus...so...
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lisabeth
@lisabethur8
13 Years50,000+ Posts

Comments: 4373 · Posts: 50653 · Topics: 564
Posted by Black-Mamba

In the meantime think of cheap hobbies you can get into

You can make liquors, knit, read, maje candles, up your skills, learn a new language, get new certificates for work

The things one can do with their time is limitless

You have a house i see..

Do you like gardening

Your man is hot tho i can see why you cling so hard


yeah those are good hobbies to take up for housewife/domestic woman type.

you can also work, but in my experience, he is the breadwinner lol
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lisabeth
@lisabethur8
13 Years50,000+ Posts

Comments: 4373 · Posts: 50653 · Topics: 564
Posted by Impulsv

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by -Apis-

How long have you guys been together now?

Are you scared hes gonna leave you?

Has he given you a reason to worry?

What do you get outta being so clingy?

Can he use the bathroom by himself?

I love the barrage of questions...

6 months

Yes, but he has not given me a reason to think that, other than my own deep rooted insecurities.

I get a headache and heart palpitations and anxiety/worry. We also just have so much fun and get a long so well. We keep eachtoher laughing and smiling the whole day. I'm just love the feels I g7et being around him.

Yes he can, but he prefers me to hold it sometimes


Has he given you any inclination that he's tired of it?

Yes he says "this can't keep happening. It's okay for now and I hope we can get past this. But if it's been a year ans it hasn't gotten better then idk, I'm afraid it's never going to stop. How about when we love together? Or I give you a ring? Will you still be paranoid and anxious?"....

i hope. It. But I'm unsure myself


Do you ever go take time to just be alone or hangout with friends without him?

Rarely...my friends are busy with their lives as well and I'm about 40 minutes away from them so it's hard to find time. On my day off (Mondays) i try to gwt together with them.

And only when he's working do I do my own thing. Otherwise it's me just distracting myself until I get a chance to be with him


So he's pretty much all you have?

Do you work?

He the only thing I have that I fully enjoy.

I work yes, I'm not extremely happy with my job but I recently got a title change and I'm hoping with that comes some motivation and a new perspective on it.

So any advice @-apis- looking at you Taurus male...


Me personally I'm not a fan of women who always want to be with me. Not that I dont enjoy spending time with them, but I feel obligated to them. Almost as if I have to cut short what I'm doing in order to make sure they're happy, just gets old after a while.

If he hasn't given you a reason to feel insecure, it sounds like it doesnt really bother him he just wants to see you get secure, and you hate the feeling of doing it, you just need to relax some (I know it's easier said than done) and fill your time with other things (hobbies arent the best at occupying your mind with these things, I dont think, because you arent obligated to do them, you can stop at anytime and your mind never gets off what was making you anxious while doing them).

Do you write? I know a lot of people who write for this very reason. It helps them get out every they feel when they feel it, but almost changes their behavior after seeing it in black and white. They can own it better.

You guys are fairly new together so wanting to be around each other all the time is kinda normal I think. Burnout is what will get ya if you're around each other all the time. Or losing yourself.

First off I'm shocked you gave honest helpful advice and not just trolling and/or a funny comment. Thank you.

And yes, everything you said is fact.

I've been trying to write lately...hand cramping seems to get me.

He isn't per say bothered yet. He keeps saying it really isn't a big deal. But I just want to for myself be healthier mentally, and yes burn out is a real concern of mine.

I let him do his hobbies when we are togther nd as he's doing his i do mine. He playa poano, i draw and paint. He playa his video games I play mine. I go to bed early and he stays up playing them. I never don't let him do his thing. He knows me being with him makes me happy and sets me at ease. He find a it cute most of the time. I just find myself to be pathetic and lame becasue of it

What’s wrong bf with feeling that way about him

I think when we have a great love there can be a lot fear and anxiety about losing what we have been searching for

It’s human

At least in the beginning stages it will be amplified

But don’t be so hard on yourself


click to expand



thats what i think too.

if it's your NATURE to be like that, dont hate it. love it.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by Black-Mamba

In the meantime think of cheap hobbies you can get into

You can make liquors, knit, read, maje candles, up your skills, learn a new language, get new certificates for work

The things one can do with their time is limitless

You have a house i see..

Do you like gardening

Your man is hot tho i can see why you cling so hard


yeah those are good hobbies to take up for housewife/domestic woman type.

you can also work, but in my experience, he is the breadwinner lol
click to expand


I do work.

And he admires me for it. But I work 9 to 5. His schedule is different everyday.
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jeane
@jeane
11 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 22 · Posts: 8048 · Topics: 36
I think being 6 months in is not going to help either. It's a period of madness where you cannot get enough of each other. Chemicals are going crazy in your brain and there is a sense of soothing you each receive from the others company.

Hopefully as that wears off, you'll calm down a bit. I think a lot of insecurity stems from feeling that we are not strong enough to deal with the worst case scenario ie being left/rejected. But you are strong enough. It's recognising that whatever happens in life you have the strength to get through it.

Once you realise that you'll begin to loosen your grip. Holding on so tightly quickly tires you out. You stop enjoying life. Instead you begin to run yourself ragged trying to keep everything in place. Life is chaos. You can't control it. You just have to let it take you where it wants to.

This message is brought to you by International Air Signs United.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by sagittariusxo

im this way with my bull. i don't feel codependent but its because i recognize that i could get that way and resist.

granted i don't live with my Taurus. we spend weekends together and mayby 2-3 day together during the week.

i never restrict him or make him feel restricted in the relationship even tho, internally i have a little separation anxity when i know he is free but choosing to do other things. such as, "im going to go grab a beer with so and so, or going to go to NYC to see so and so" i mean of couse i want to be included but i know it best that i take space for myself to do my own things that i put off when im with him and i think it makes the trust this work better because he knows i trust him, he never has to feel as if he can do things without me, and for the most part he always chooses to do things with me, Same team.

its only really ever hard at night, when you just want to cuddle them or wake up next to them. but im sure i will have the rest of my life for that. so i just go thru the negative emotions and let it be done with.

and for the most part, bulls love the affirmative attention so when we are together it is very affectionate and loving and cheesy.

First I just want to say I always enjoy your advice and input, I'm always able to relate to you, so thank you for being you!

Have you even expressed your separation anxiety to him or are you good at keeping it to yourself? My issue is I think I overshare, if I just kept some butter to myself I don't think I would feel so anxious that he is going to leave me.

I Have to learn to keep my mouth shut and just leave him be lol.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
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Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by jeane

I think being 6 months in is not going to help either. It's a period of madness where you cannot get enough of each other. Chemicals are going crazy in your brain and there is a sense of soothing you each receive from the others company.

Hopefully as that wears off, you'll calm down a bit. I think a lot of insecurity stems from feeling that we are not strong enough to deal with the worst case scenario ie being left/rejected. But you are strong enough. It's recognising that whatever happens in life you have the strength to get through it.

Once you realise that you'll begin to loosen your grip. Holding on so tightly quickly tires you out. You stop enjoying life. Instead you begin to run yourself ragged trying to keep everything in place. Life is chaos. You can't control it. You just have to let it take you where it wants to.

This message is brought to you by International Air Signs United.

Lol internation air signs united.

This is true, but I still think it's an issue and deep seeded in my past. A little bit of cling is okay, but I become obsessive and just share it all with him. So I have to learn to hold back a bit.

I have to work on making my mind and emotional state stronger.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
So update:

I'm taking two nights to myself not seeing my bull until tomorrow night, but he called me on his way home from work last night and he is hurt by me saying I needed a break to work on myself. Even though he understands it he said "I do have feelings...i can feel inadaquet too. Am I not fulfilling a need of yours? Is that why you are feeling like this" which is the largest from the truth. What I realized is sometimes I'm so focused on my chaos in my head and my emotions I forget to check in with him about his.

He cares and adores me. I leaving would destroy him as much as me.

So moving forward I need to work on myself with him supporting and being press t
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

So update:

I'm taking two nights to myself not seeing my bull until tomorrow night, but he called me on his way home from work last night and he is hurt by me saying I needed a break to work on myself. Even though he understands it he said "I do have feelings...i can feel inadaquet too. Am I not fulfilling a need of yours? Is that why you are feeling like this" which is the largest from the truth. What I realized is sometimes I'm so focused on my chaos in my head and my emotions I forget to check in with him about his.

He cares and adores me. I leaving would destroy him as much as me.

So moving forward I need to work on myself with him supporting and being press t


he's too fuking cute
click to expand


He is. But I can also sense an anger toward me for even mentioning the word break becasue he said this morning...or like t minutes ago" I don't wanna hear that word break again. Unless it's break up and you mean it"...he doesn't appreciate me saying things without meaning them. Taurus, say what you mean and do as you say.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

So update:

I'm taking two nights to myself not seeing my bull until tomorrow night, but he called me on his way home from work last night and he is hurt by me saying I needed a break to work on myself. Even though he understands it he said "I do have feelings...i can feel inadaquet too. Am I not fulfilling a need of yours? Is that why you are feeling like this" which is the largest from the truth. What I realized is sometimes I'm so focused on my chaos in my head and my emotions I forget to check in with him about his.

He cares and adores me. I leaving would destroy him as much as me.

So moving forward I need to work on myself with him supporting and being press t


he's too fuking cute

He is. But I can also sense an anger toward me for even mentioning the word break becasue he said this morning...or like t minutes ago" I don't wanna hear that word break again. Unless it's break up and you mean it"...he doesn't appreciate me saying things without meaning them. Taurus, say what you mean and do as you say.


yeah i wouldn't use words like that

click to expand


I tried to explain that I mean more so take some space and a step back. Becasue I want to be my best self for him, he ubderstands...but obviously hurt at the thought I couldn't do it while still being with him. Sometimes my word choice is poor and def causes some problems in my relationships in general.
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jeane
@jeane
11 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 22 · Posts: 8048 · Topics: 36
Posted by Boots1313

Posted by jeane

I think being 6 months in is not going to help either. It's a period of madness where you cannot get enough of each other. Chemicals are going crazy in your brain and there is a sense of soothing you each receive from the others company.

Hopefully as that wears off, you'll calm down a bit. I think a lot of insecurity stems from feeling that we are not strong enough to deal with the worst case scenario ie being left/rejected. But you are strong enough. It's recognising that whatever happens in life you have the strength to get through it.

Once you realise that you'll begin to loosen your grip. Holding on so tightly quickly tires you out. You stop enjoying life. Instead you begin to run yourself ragged trying to keep everything in place. Life is chaos. You can't control it. You just have to let it take you where it wants to.

This message is brought to you by International Air Signs United.

Lol internation air signs united.

This is true, but I still think it's an issue and deep seeded in my past. A little bit of cling is okay, but I become obsessive and just share it all with him. So I have to learn to hold back a bit.

I have to work on making my mind and emotional state stronger.
click to expand



yes, i think it is about making your emotional state stronger but you know, you're strong already! it's about trusting yourself that you're ok, that whatever happens is ok, that you've got this. you've been through shit before and you've not crumbled.

it's all baby steps. i wouldn't tell him what you are up to. i would just try to re-route my reactions. if you're reaction is to cling at 5pm and call him or whatever, tell yourself you'll call him at 6. the next day make it 6.30. the day after, a little later again. it's all incremental changes that add up to a lot in the end.

by the way, i was obsessive with my bull and but i didn't share. #neverletthemseeyousweat
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by jeane

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by jeane

I think being 6 months in is not going to help either. It's a period of madness where you cannot get enough of each other. Chemicals are going crazy in your brain and there is a sense of soothing you each receive from the others company.

Hopefully as that wears off, you'll calm down a bit. I think a lot of insecurity stems from feeling that we are not strong enough to deal with the worst case scenario ie being left/rejected. But you are strong enough. It's recognising that whatever happens in life you have the strength to get through it.

Once you realise that you'll begin to loosen your grip. Holding on so tightly quickly tires you out. You stop enjoying life. Instead you begin to run yourself ragged trying to keep everything in place. Life is chaos. You can't control it. You just have to let it take you where it wants to.

This message is brought to you by International Air Signs United.

Lol internation air signs united.

This is true, but I still think it's an issue and deep seeded in my past. A little bit of cling is okay, but I become obsessive and just share it all with him. So I have to learn to hold back a bit.

I have to work on making my mind and emotional state stronger.


yes, i think it is about making your emotional state stronger but you know, you're strong already! it's about trusting yourself that you're ok, that whatever happens is ok, that you've got this. you've been through shit before and you've not crumbled.

it's all baby steps. i wouldn't tell him what you are up to. i would just try to re-route my reactions. if you're reaction is to cling at 5pm and call him or whatever, tell yourself you'll call him at 6. the next day make it 6.30. the day after, a little later again. it's all incremental changes that add up to a lot in the end.

by the way, i was obsessive with my bull and but i didn't share. #neverletthemseeyousweat
click to expand


Lol, I just trust him and I value his options/advice so I pit it all out there. I need to also work on constructing my thoughts before speaking. Most often I think out loud so a lotnofnit isbjist fleeting thoughts and not solid decisions.

Also and he knows by my silence over the phone or if we're together facial expressions (no poker face) that something is up. He likes to poke until he gets an answer even if I say "let me think for a minute before I tell you" ...so often times I burst and just tell him EVERYTHING. And that's where the issues arise. I'm not eloquent when my Virgo moon kicks in and my Gemini merc is all over the place. Lol.

But yes baby steps. I said that to him this morning and he says I'm making a lot of sense and he's here to support.

There is also a part of me that is concerned I'm developing bipolar disorder like my father and grandmother. Something to think about and keep in check. So I shares that fear with him as well. He doesn't think that's the case but he said he will support me as long as he can.

Strength is really the thing
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

So update:

I'm taking two nights to myself not seeing my bull until tomorrow night, but he called me on his way home from work last night and he is hurt by me saying I needed a break to work on myself. Even though he understands it he said "I do have feelings...i can feel inadaquet too. Am I not fulfilling a need of yours? Is that why you are feeling like this" which is the largest from the truth. What I realized is sometimes I'm so focused on my chaos in my head and my emotions I forget to check in with him about his.

He cares and adores me. I leaving would destroy him as much as me.

So moving forward I need to work on myself with him supporting and being press t


he's too fuking cute

He is. But I can also sense an anger toward me for even mentioning the word break becasue he said this morning...or like t minutes ago" I don't wanna hear that word break again. Unless it's break up and you mean it"...he doesn't appreciate me saying things without meaning them. Taurus, say what you mean and do as you say.


yeah i wouldn't use words like that



I tried to explain that I mean more so take some space and a step back. Becasue I want to be my best self for him, he ubderstands...but obviously hurt at the thought I couldn't do it while still being with him. Sometimes my word choice is poor and def causes some problems in my relationships in general.


understandable, seems you're both very kind to one another!

i have good feelings about you two.

click to expand


Thank you.

I do too most days. Today im feeling down. I fear while he's away from me for two days he will realize his feelings aren't as strong and I'm not worth the effort.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

So update:

I'm taking two nights to myself not seeing my bull until tomorrow night, but he called me on his way home from work last night and he is hurt by me saying I needed a break to work on myself. Even though he understands it he said "I do have feelings...i can feel inadaquet too. Am I not fulfilling a need of yours? Is that why you are feeling like this" which is the largest from the truth. What I realized is sometimes I'm so focused on my chaos in my head and my emotions I forget to check in with him about his.

He cares and adores me. I leaving would destroy him as much as me.

So moving forward I need to work on myself with him supporting and being press t


he's too fuking cute

He is. But I can also sense an anger toward me for even mentioning the word break becasue he said this morning...or like t minutes ago" I don't wanna hear that word break again. Unless it's break up and you mean it"...he doesn't appreciate me saying things without meaning them. Taurus, say what you mean and do as you say.


yeah i wouldn't use words like that



I tried to explain that I mean more so take some space and a step back. Becasue I want to be my best self for him, he ubderstands...but obviously hurt at the thought I couldn't do it while still being with him. Sometimes my word choice is poor and def causes some problems in my relationships in general.


understandable, seems you're both very kind to one another!

i have good feelings about you two.



Thank you he is the kindest man, and I've always been compassionate. We give to each other a lot.

I do too most days. Today im feeling down. I fear while he's away from me for two days he will realize his feelings aren't as strong and I'm not worth the effort.

click to expand


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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

So update:

I'm taking two nights to myself not seeing my bull until tomorrow night, but he called me on his way home from work last night and he is hurt by me saying I needed a break to work on myself. Even though he understands it he said "I do have feelings...i can feel inadaquet too. Am I not fulfilling a need of yours? Is that why you are feeling like this" which is the largest from the truth. What I realized is sometimes I'm so focused on my chaos in my head and my emotions I forget to check in with him about his.

He cares and adores me. I leaving would destroy him as much as me.

So moving forward I need to work on myself with him supporting and being press t


he's too fuking cute

He is. But I can also sense an anger toward me for even mentioning the word break becasue he said this morning...or like t minutes ago" I don't wanna hear that word break again. Unless it's break up and you mean it"...he doesn't appreciate me saying things without meaning them. Taurus, say what you mean and do as you say.


yeah i wouldn't use words like that



I tried to explain that I mean more so take some space and a step back. Becasue I want to be my best self for him, he ubderstands...but obviously hurt at the thought I couldn't do it while still being with him. Sometimes my word choice is poor and def causes some problems in my relationships in general.


understandable, seems you're both very kind to one another!

i have good feelings about you two.



Thank you.

I do too most days. Today im feeling down. I fear while he's away from me for two days he will realize his feelings aren't as strong and I'm not worth the effort.




You have to really work on your insecurities

maybe telling yourself you're wonderful more often might help

you seem cool

click to expand


Lol I am wonderful and cool and I have a lot to offer. No idea why I'm so insecure...im still carrying around emotional baggage from a past failed relationship which I admit I didnt give myself the necessary time to heal before dating again. But this guy fell into my lap and he broke down my walls and I needed to take the jump and risk while I could sol...here I am lol.
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Boots1313

So update:

I'm taking two nights to myself not seeing my bull until tomorrow night, but he called me on his way home from work last night and he is hurt by me saying I needed a break to work on myself. Even though he understands it he said "I do have feelings...i can feel inadaquet too. Am I not fulfilling a need of yours? Is that why you are feeling like this" which is the largest from the truth. What I realized is sometimes I'm so focused on my chaos in my head and my emotions I forget to check in with him about his.

He cares and adores me. I leaving would destroy him as much as me.

So moving forward I need to work on myself with him supporting and being press t


he's too fuking cute

He is. But I can also sense an anger toward me for even mentioning the word break becasue he said this morning...or like t minutes ago" I don't wanna hear that word break again. Unless it's break up and you mean it"...he doesn't appreciate me saying things without meaning them. Taurus, say what you mean and do as you say.


yeah i wouldn't use words like that



I tried to explain that I mean more so take some space and a step back. Becasue I want to be my best self for him, he ubderstands...but obviously hurt at the thought I couldn't do it while still being with him. Sometimes my word choice is poor and def causes some problems in my relationships in general.


understandable, seems you're both very kind to one another!

i have good feelings about you two.



Thank you.

I do too most days. Today im feeling down. I fear while he's away from me for two days he will realize his feelings aren't as strong and I'm not worth the effort.




You have to really work on your insecurities

maybe telling yourself you're wonderful more often might help

you seem cool



Lol I am wonderful and cool and I have a lot to offer. No idea why I'm so insecure...im still carrying around emotional baggage from a past failed relationship which I admit I didnt give myself the necessary time to heal before dating again. But this guy fell into my lap and he broke down my walls and I needed to take the jump and risk while I could sol...here I am lol.


and that's not his problem to deal with, but yours.

so deal with it

get a therapist if you need it

or keep a journal
click to expand


Yes I know. And I tell him all the time none of my issues are becasue of him. He realizes I have baggage and he accepts it. But I'm well aware it's my battle to conquer.
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SagittariusXO
@sagittariusxo
8 YearsSagittarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 455 · Topics: 38
Posted by Boots1313

Posted by sagittariusxo

im this way with my bull. i don't feel codependent but its because i recognize that i could get that way and resist.

granted i don't live with my Taurus. we spend weekends together and mayby 2-3 day together during the week.

i never restrict him or make him feel restricted in the relationship even tho, internally i have a little separation anxity when i know he is free but choosing to do other things. such as, "im going to go grab a beer with so and so, or going to go to NYC to see so and so" i mean of couse i want to be included but i know it best that i take space for myself to do my own things that i put off when im with him and i think it makes the trust this work better because he knows i trust him, he never has to feel as if he can do things without me, and for the most part he always chooses to do things with me, Same team.

its only really ever hard at night, when you just want to cuddle them or wake up next to them. but im sure i will have the rest of my life for that. so i just go thru the negative emotions and let it be done with.

and for the most part, bulls love the affirmative attention so when we are together it is very affectionate and loving and cheesy.

First I just want to say I always enjoy your advice and input, I'm always able to relate to you, so thank you for being you!

Have you even expressed your separation anxiety to him or are you good at keeping it to yourself? My issue is I think I overshare, if I just kept some butter to myself I don't think I would feel so anxious that he is going to leave me.

I Have to learn to keep my mouth shut and just leave him be lol.
click to expand



awww I so glad you feel that way. i feel the same about you. so the feeling is mutual. xoxo

i do tell him not so directly that i do love being with him and that i miss him when we are apart. i have expressed that i want to live with him because i want to wake up and go to sleep next to him everyday thinking that will help me be more secure with always knowing he is coming home to me. but NO i don't tell him i get this tightness in my chest when we are apart, or that im insecure, or that im dependent. i don't want to accept that about me in general and i don't want him to think that about me at all either, true or not. so i don't say those things.

in my situation. i know that i am a jump to conclusions type, i think about the worst in perpetration to protect myself at all time and i know that he does not like that about me. there have been many time he has said that when i act this way " i take him for granted and i don't give him the benefit of the doubt, which ultimately hurts him" and i can also cause him to not trust me or feel he needs to protect me from knowing this and i don't want that either.

i have to always remind myself, that he proves himself in so many way that i know i do take for granted when i act out of fear and i always have to remind myself that its all in my head because the proof is all there all the time that he and i are a solid team even when things are in a funk and even when we are apart. im also much happier as a person when i force myself to shake or ignore those the negative thoughts, (i shake them out and talk to myself in 3rd person, tell myself to stop tripping and that everything is ok" - affirmations are something that has really helped me.

so in short term i very much encourage his independence when we do things not together even tho it makes me feel a little lost without him. i know its healthier this way, i know that distance really does bring us closer, and i also know (force myself to remember) that he isn't going anywhere when it comes to our relationship. i know that he makes me happy and i know that im a better person because of him so i FORCE myself to act as if it doesn't bother me until its all over......rinse and repeat. - its my issues i need to work thru to make it better for me and it has been better now that ive been at this for almost 2 years.

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SagittariusXO
@sagittariusxo
8 YearsSagittarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 455 · Topics: 38
if can say anything don't let your brain control the situations.

do whatever is going to make you feel better in that exact moment.

if you love your bull and your fearful about things that haven't happened then your thinking too much.

if you want to me in your bulls presents because he is your happy place be with him.

do not say you need space when you know you love him and want to be there. a break is only allow unnessessary space. the only time space is needed is when there are other things you or your bull wants to do on there own. (i.e. Guys night, Girls Night, unwined, video games, ect) that is the space you can accept, that is them being there own person, that is allowing them to do things without you so they can come home and tell you all about it. that is healthy space.

unless you feel as if you are not happy in this relationship and you think you are better off exploring your options single then putting space between you and him is just punishment, not only for you but MOSTLY for him. he didn't do anything to you, he isn't in control of your WILD MINDSET, and yet you might be pushing yourself away from him, to him for no reason and your only causing him to feel the pain and insecurities. you have to be careful with these Taurus men. they love very deeply and they try so hard to make others happy and they are so good at it that it sucks us in to feel as if we need there love in a dependent way because its so good like that, but that is not their fault that they do such a good job at loving us.

i think if you love him and you know that this is something you don't want to lose you need to reflect on what your doing to relationship. reflect on your own state of mind and how your focus is not on the positives. and also reflect on how you would feel if you were him. i would hate for you to lose something you love because of your own self sabotage.

i know i have had to work on the myself and im so thankful i didn't run him away with my crazy mind. i cant think about a more perfect person then my bull for me and i will work on bettering my self for him always to make this relationship work, as long as i continue to be this happy.
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AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
12 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Comments: 14265 · Posts: 5321 · Topics: 61
Posted by Boots1313

Posted by DefineTruth

I think you need to ask yourself why this is an issue for you. Maybe once you look internally, you can come up with ways to de-cling.

I've always had issues, I just never realized it until this relationship (him being very independent) my past boyfriends were just as dependent as I, so I learned that this behavior is "normal".

It's weird becasue I know I should go, and I over stay my welcome. And there are things I want to/need to do, but I don't becasue I don't want to leave or be away from him.

The first step to moving past it is realization, then I just need to implement.

What I'm saying is (and what I've said to him) is he needs to sometimes tell me to go instead of "do whatever you want. You can stay or you can go " given those options 99.9% of the time I'm going to stay, but be restless becasue I know there are other things I need to do!

Baby steps...one of two days a week alone.and I'm going to try harder to just do things when I need to instead of putting them off.

So far that's what I got
click to expand



It's time for you to look inside yourself and picture who you really want to be as a partner. If you want a partnership with more freedom, do it. Make it happen. I get the anxiety but time is precious. You will never get the time back. And while it may have been fulfilling on an intimate level, you are closing yourself off to the future. Think about what you want to accomplish in life--your meaningful purpose if you will. Think about what tangible steps you can take towards it now. If he's worth anything, he will be happy for you and do anything he can to make it work. But you have to trust that. Know that not just anyone will work, but someone, a very special someone will. Do your best to relax and let the universe take you where you need to be. When I am following my life's purpose, I trust that it will and it does. Its very hard to let go of the illusion of control, but an illusion it is. It seems like your relationship is kind of keeping you from evolving spirtiually. Or I could be way off base haha 😅
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Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

If you want to reduce the time you spend together so that you feel that you’re being your best self that is great. As others said get some hobbies or spend time with friends or family.

From my point of view I would love a relationship like that, I could soak up all the attention they could give me (compounded by the Cancer Moon). Like @-Apis- said I might like an occasional break but just for a couple of hours or a day tops.

I also wouldn’t worry about him liking you less or finding someone else if you’re not around as much. I don’t know if it’s the same for Taurus women but I don’t get into relationships lightly so I don’t break them lightly either.



Because only own self I am defiently keeping myself from doing things while being with him. Not his fault in the least, so I'm taking these steps for me. He does love me being around but he is a loner and enjoys his video games one of two nights a week.

He has a Libra moon, and gem Venus which is why I'm fearful of him losing interest. But I really can't control that. So I keep to keep positive and realize he likes me and wants to work on this togther. However cancer mars...so that's a positive.

I know he loves me and cares. He's the most devoted man I've met inawhile.

I jump into relationships quick. But I stay for awhile.
Profile picture of Boots1313
Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

If you want to reduce the time you spend together so that you feel that you’re being your best self that is great. As others said get some hobbies or spend time with friends or family.

From my point of view I would love a relationship like that, I could soak up all the attention they could give me (compounded by the Cancer Moon). Like @-Apis- said I might like an occasional break but just for a couple of hours or a day tops.

I also wouldn’t worry about him liking you less or finding someone else if you’re not around as much. I don’t know if it’s the same for Taurus women but I don’t get into relationships lightly so I don’t break them lightly either.



Because only own self I am defiently keeping myself from doing things while being with him. Not his fault in the least, so I'm taking these steps for me. He does love me being around but he is a loner and enjoys his video games one of two nights a week.

He has a Libra moon, and gem Venus which is why I'm fearful of him losing interest. But I really can't control that. So I keep to keep positive and realize he likes me and wants to work on this togther. However cancer mars...so that's a positive.

I know he loves me and cares. He's the most devoted man I've met inawhile.

I jump into relationships quick. But I stay for awhile.


I think after 6 months he knows his feelings towards you and if he says he loves you believe it.

I wouldn’t make any big changes immediately but maybe spend half a day apart, then a day and gradually build it up. I can be a loner and sometimes play videogames but I would reduce that for a relationship.

I guess what I’m saying is don’t worry about him straying away. If he was to do it there is nothing you can do about it and you can’t control others so no point being stressed about it.

As for doing things you want to do maybe list some of them out and make some plans 🙂
click to expand


Thank you for the reassurance. And you are right I can't control his feelings or what he does so I just have to believe him when he tells me he cares and likes me and doesn't wanna break up.

Also I like lists, lists are fun 😀
Profile picture of Boots1313
Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

If you want to reduce the time you spend together so that you feel that you’re being your best self that is great. As others said get some hobbies or spend time with friends or family.

From my point of view I would love a relationship like that, I could soak up all the attention they could give me (compounded by the Cancer Moon). Like @-Apis- said I might like an occasional break but just for a couple of hours or a day tops.

I also wouldn’t worry about him liking you less or finding someone else if you’re not around as much. I don’t know if it’s the same for Taurus women but I don’t get into relationships lightly so I don’t break them lightly either.



Because only own self I am defiently keeping myself from doing things while being with him. Not his fault in the least, so I'm taking these steps for me. He does love me being around but he is a loner and enjoys his video games one of two nights a week.

He has a Libra moon, and gem Venus which is why I'm fearful of him losing interest. But I really can't control that. So I keep to keep positive and realize he likes me and wants to work on this togther. However cancer mars...so that's a positive.

I know he loves me and cares. He's the most devoted man I've met inawhile.

I jump into relationships quick. But I stay for awhile.


I think after 6 months he knows his feelings towards you and if he says he loves you believe it.

I wouldn’t make any big changes immediately but maybe spend half a day apart, then a day and gradually build it up. I can be a loner and sometimes play videogames but I would reduce that for a relationship.

I guess what I’m saying is don’t worry about him straying away. If he was to do it there is nothing you can do about it and you can’t control others so no point being stressed about it.

As for doing things you want to do maybe list some of them out and make some plans 🙂

Thank you for the reassurance. And you are right I can't control his feelings or what he does so I just have to believe him when he tells me he cares and likes me and doesn't wanna break up.

Also I like lists, lists are fun 😀


One thing I would say is don’t tell him all the time you are worried about him leaving. It’s sort of an insult to his loyalty and will get him thinking. However, if there’s a specific thing he can do like give a cuddle or hold hands then ask for it but don’t explain why.

Yes, lists are awesome and may take your mind off it too 😁
click to expand


So then what do I do if I've already shared with him my fears of him leaving?
Profile picture of jeane
jeane
@jeane
11 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 22 · Posts: 8048 · Topics: 36
Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

If you want to reduce the time you spend together so that you feel that you’re being your best self that is great. As others said get some hobbies or spend time with friends or family.

From my point of view I would love a relationship like that, I could soak up all the attention they could give me (compounded by the Cancer Moon). Like @-Apis- said I might like an occasional break but just for a couple of hours or a day tops.

I also wouldn’t worry about him liking you less or finding someone else if you’re not around as much. I don’t know if it’s the same for Taurus women but I don’t get into relationships lightly so I don’t break them lightly either.



Because only own self I am defiently keeping myself from doing things while being with him. Not his fault in the least, so I'm taking these steps for me. He does love me being around but he is a loner and enjoys his video games one of two nights a week.

He has a Libra moon, and gem Venus which is why I'm fearful of him losing interest. But I really can't control that. So I keep to keep positive and realize he likes me and wants to work on this togther. However cancer mars...so that's a positive.

I know he loves me and cares. He's the most devoted man I've met inawhile.

I jump into relationships quick. But I stay for awhile.


I think after 6 months he knows his feelings towards you and if he says he loves you believe it.

I wouldn’t make any big changes immediately but maybe spend half a day apart, then a day and gradually build it up. I can be a loner and sometimes play videogames but I would reduce that for a relationship.

I guess what I’m saying is don’t worry about him straying away. If he was to do it there is nothing you can do about it and you can’t control others so no point being stressed about it.

As for doing things you want to do maybe list some of them out and make some plans 🙂

Thank you for the reassurance. And you are right I can't control his feelings or what he does so I just have to believe him when he tells me he cares and likes me and doesn't wanna break up.

Also I like lists, lists are fun 😀


One thing I would say is don’t tell him all the time you are worried about him leaving. It’s sort of an insult to his loyalty and will get him thinking. However, if there’s a specific thing he can do like give a cuddle or hold hands then ask for it but don’t explain why.

Yes, lists are awesome and may take your mind off it too 😁

So then what do I do if I've already shared with him my fears of him leaving?
click to expand



i know you are waiting for atgr's answer but my response to be to stop it!

i always find positive reinforcement better for everyone concerned.

instead of saying "i worry you are going to leave", say "thanks for x (taking me to dinner, carrying the shopping, being supportive). not only is it nice to hear but it changes your focus from the negative (ie the fear of leaving) to the positive (all the lovely things he does as a partner).
Profile picture of Boots1313
Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by jeane

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

If you want to reduce the time you spend together so that you feel that you’re being your best self that is great. As others said get some hobbies or spend time with friends or family.

From my point of view I would love a relationship like that, I could soak up all the attention they could give me (compounded by the Cancer Moon). Like @-Apis- said I might like an occasional break but just for a couple of hours or a day tops.

I also wouldn’t worry about him liking you less or finding someone else if you’re not around as much. I don’t know if it’s the same for Taurus women but I don’t get into relationships lightly so I don’t break them lightly either.



Because only own self I am defiently keeping myself from doing things while being with him. Not his fault in the least, so I'm taking these steps for me. He does love me being around but he is a loner and enjoys his video games one of two nights a week.

He has a Libra moon, and gem Venus which is why I'm fearful of him losing interest. But I really can't control that. So I keep to keep positive and realize he likes me and wants to work on this togther. However cancer mars...so that's a positive.

I know he loves me and cares. He's the most devoted man I've met inawhile.

I jump into relationships quick. But I stay for awhile.


I think after 6 months he knows his feelings towards you and if he says he loves you believe it.

I wouldn’t make any big changes immediately but maybe spend half a day apart, then a day and gradually build it up. I can be a loner and sometimes play videogames but I would reduce that for a relationship.

I guess what I’m saying is don’t worry about him straying away. If he was to do it there is nothing you can do about it and you can’t control others so no point being stressed about it.

As for doing things you want to do maybe list some of them out and make some plans 🙂

Thank you for the reassurance. And you are right I can't control his feelings or what he does so I just have to believe him when he tells me he cares and likes me and doesn't wanna break up.

Also I like lists, lists are fun 😀


One thing I would say is don’t tell him all the time you are worried about him leaving. It’s sort of an insult to his loyalty and will get him thinking. However, if there’s a specific thing he can do like give a cuddle or hold hands then ask for it but don’t explain why.

Yes, lists are awesome and may take your mind off it too 😁

So then what do I do if I've already shared with him my fears of him leaving?


i know you are waiting for atgr's answer but my response to be to stop it!

i always find positive reinforcement better for everyone concerned.

instead of saying "i worry you are going to leave", say "thanks for x (taking me to dinner, carrying the shopping, being supportive). not only is it nice to hear but it changes your focus from the negative (ie the fear of leaving) to the positive (all the lovely things he does as a partner).
click to expand


I guess what I meant was. Did I blow it already telling him this...or can I reverse it. Move on and now start being positive ?

Btw I say all these things in an adorable way that makes him smile but ...i know it's detrimental
Profile picture of jeane
jeane
@jeane
11 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 22 · Posts: 8048 · Topics: 36
Posted by Boots1313

Posted by jeane

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

If you want to reduce the time you spend together so that you feel that you’re being your best self that is great. As others said get some hobbies or spend time with friends or family.

From my point of view I would love a relationship like that, I could soak up all the attention they could give me (compounded by the Cancer Moon). Like @-Apis- said I might like an occasional break but just for a couple of hours or a day tops.

I also wouldn’t worry about him liking you less or finding someone else if you’re not around as much. I don’t know if it’s the same for Taurus women but I don’t get into relationships lightly so I don’t break them lightly either.



Because only own self I am defiently keeping myself from doing things while being with him. Not his fault in the least, so I'm taking these steps for me. He does love me being around but he is a loner and enjoys his video games one of two nights a week.

He has a Libra moon, and gem Venus which is why I'm fearful of him losing interest. But I really can't control that. So I keep to keep positive and realize he likes me and wants to work on this togther. However cancer mars...so that's a positive.

I know he loves me and cares. He's the most devoted man I've met inawhile.

I jump into relationships quick. But I stay for awhile.


I think after 6 months he knows his feelings towards you and if he says he loves you believe it.

I wouldn’t make any big changes immediately but maybe spend half a day apart, then a day and gradually build it up. I can be a loner and sometimes play videogames but I would reduce that for a relationship.

I guess what I’m saying is don’t worry about him straying away. If he was to do it there is nothing you can do about it and you can’t control others so no point being stressed about it.

As for doing things you want to do maybe list some of them out and make some plans 🙂

Thank you for the reassurance. And you are right I can't control his feelings or what he does so I just have to believe him when he tells me he cares and likes me and doesn't wanna break up.

Also I like lists, lists are fun 😀


One thing I would say is don’t tell him all the time you are worried about him leaving. It’s sort of an insult to his loyalty and will get him thinking. However, if there’s a specific thing he can do like give a cuddle or hold hands then ask for it but don’t explain why.

Yes, lists are awesome and may take your mind off it too 😁

So then what do I do if I've already shared with him my fears of him leaving?


i know you are waiting for atgr's answer but my response to be to stop it!

i always find positive reinforcement better for everyone concerned.

instead of saying "i worry you are going to leave", say "thanks for x (taking me to dinner, carrying the shopping, being supportive). not only is it nice to hear but it changes your focus from the negative (ie the fear of leaving) to the positive (all the lovely things he does as a partner).

I guess what I meant was. Did I blow it already telling him this...or can I reverse it. Move on and now start being positive ?

Btw I say all these things in an adorable way that makes him smile but ...i know it's detrimental
click to expand



i wouldn't imagine so. between you and me, i don't think men think that deeply about stuff. things happen in the moment and then it's gone. it's a rare one that hangs on to stuff to the same extent as women.

if you're really lucky you'll get one like mine who forgets stuff completely. like the biggest fight we ever had. split up for a month, didn't talk to one another, lots of hurt feelings. does he remember it? he had no idea what i was talking about when i mentioned it.
Profile picture of Boots1313
Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

If you want to reduce the time you spend together so that you feel that you’re being your best self that is great. As others said get some hobbies or spend time with friends or family.

From my point of view I would love a relationship like that, I could soak up all the attention they could give me (compounded by the Cancer Moon). Like @-Apis- said I might like an occasional break but just for a couple of hours or a day tops.

I also wouldn’t worry about him liking you less or finding someone else if you’re not around as much. I don’t know if it’s the same for Taurus women but I don’t get into relationships lightly so I don’t break them lightly either.



Because only own self I am defiently keeping myself from doing things while being with him. Not his fault in the least, so I'm taking these steps for me. He does love me being around but he is a loner and enjoys his video games one of two nights a week.

He has a Libra moon, and gem Venus which is why I'm fearful of him losing interest. But I really can't control that. So I keep to keep positive and realize he likes me and wants to work on this togther. However cancer mars...so that's a positive.

I know he loves me and cares. He's the most devoted man I've met inawhile.

I jump into relationships quick. But I stay for awhile.


I think after 6 months he knows his feelings towards you and if he says he loves you believe it.

I wouldn’t make any big changes immediately but maybe spend half a day apart, then a day and gradually build it up. I can be a loner and sometimes play videogames but I would reduce that for a relationship.

I guess what I’m saying is don’t worry about him straying away. If he was to do it there is nothing you can do about it and you can’t control others so no point being stressed about it.

As for doing things you want to do maybe list some of them out and make some plans 🙂

Thank you for the reassurance. And you are right I can't control his feelings or what he does so I just have to believe him when he tells me he cares and likes me and doesn't wanna break up.

Also I like lists, lists are fun 😀


One thing I would say is don’t tell him all the time you are worried about him leaving. It’s sort of an insult to his loyalty and will get him thinking. However, if there’s a specific thing he can do like give a cuddle or hold hands then ask for it but don’t explain why.

Yes, lists are awesome and may take your mind off it too 😁

So then what do I do if I've already shared with him my fears of him leaving?


It’s nothing to worry about if you’ve only said it once or twice just don’t bring it up every day.
click to expand


Oh, well...how about once a month for the last 6 months.??

Let's put it this way once a month there is always something I get insecure about 😣😔
Profile picture of Boots1313
Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by jeane

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by jeane

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

If you want to reduce the time you spend together so that you feel that you’re being your best self that is great. As others said get some hobbies or spend time with friends or family.

From my point of view I would love a relationship like that, I could soak up all the attention they could give me (compounded by the Cancer Moon). Like @-Apis- said I might like an occasional break but just for a couple of hours or a day tops.

I also wouldn’t worry about him liking you less or finding someone else if you’re not around as much. I don’t know if it’s the same for Taurus women but I don’t get into relationships lightly so I don’t break them lightly either.



Because only own self I am defiently keeping myself from doing things while being with him. Not his fault in the least, so I'm taking these steps for me. He does love me being around but he is a loner and enjoys his video games one of two nights a week.

He has a Libra moon, and gem Venus which is why I'm fearful of him losing interest. But I really can't control that. So I keep to keep positive and realize he likes me and wants to work on this togther. However cancer mars...so that's a positive.

I know he loves me and cares. He's the most devoted man I've met inawhile.

I jump into relationships quick. But I stay for awhile.


I think after 6 months he knows his feelings towards you and if he says he loves you believe it.

I wouldn’t make any big changes immediately but maybe spend half a day apart, then a day and gradually build it up. I can be a loner and sometimes play videogames but I would reduce that for a relationship.

I guess what I’m saying is don’t worry about him straying away. If he was to do it there is nothing you can do about it and you can’t control others so no point being stressed about it.

As for doing things you want to do maybe list some of them out and make some plans 🙂

Thank you for the reassurance. And you are right I can't control his feelings or what he does so I just have to believe him when he tells me he cares and likes me and doesn't wanna break up.

Also I like lists, lists are fun 😀


One thing I would say is don’t tell him all the time you are worried about him leaving. It’s sort of an insult to his loyalty and will get him thinking. However, if there’s a specific thing he can do like give a cuddle or hold hands then ask for it but don’t explain why.

Yes, lists are awesome and may take your mind off it too 😁

So then what do I do if I've already shared with him my fears of him leaving?


i know you are waiting for atgr's answer but my response to be to stop it!

i always find positive reinforcement better for everyone concerned.

instead of saying "i worry you are going to leave", say "thanks for x (taking me to dinner, carrying the shopping, being supportive). not only is it nice to hear but it changes your focus from the negative (ie the fear of leaving) to the positive (all the lovely things he does as a partner).

I guess what I meant was. Did I blow it already telling him this...or can I reverse it. Move on and now start being positive ?

Btw I say all these things in an adorable way that makes him smile but ...i know it's detrimental


i wouldn't imagine so. between you and me, i don't think men think that deeply about stuff. things happen in the moment and then it's gone. it's a rare one that hangs on to stuff to the same extent as women.

if you're really lucky you'll get one like mine who forgets stuff completely. like the biggest fight we ever had. split up for a month, didn't talk to one another, lots of hurt feelings. does he remember it? he had no idea what i was talking about when i mentioned it.
click to expand


He does seem to remember all the fights, however when he brings them up it's in jest and were both able to laugh at it and say "how silly was that?!"

I'm grateful to have him
Profile picture of Boots1313
Bull-ish
@Boots1313
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 2429 · Posts: 2637 · Topics: 65
Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Posted by Boots1313

Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

If you want to reduce the time you spend together so that you feel that you’re being your best self that is great. As others said get some hobbies or spend time with friends or family.

From my point of view I would love a relationship like that, I could soak up all the attention they could give me (compounded by the Cancer Moon). Like @-Apis- said I might like an occasional break but just for a couple of hours or a day tops.

I also wouldn’t worry about him liking you less or finding someone else if you’re not around as much. I don’t know if it’s the same for Taurus women but I don’t get into relationships lightly so I don’t break them lightly either.



Because only own self I am defiently keeping myself from doing things while being with him. Not his fault in the least, so I'm taking these steps for me. He does love me being around but he is a loner and enjoys his video games one of two nights a week.

He has a Libra moon, and gem Venus which is why I'm fearful of him losing interest. But I really can't control that. So I keep to keep positive and realize he likes me and wants to work on this togther. However cancer mars...so that's a positive.

I know he loves me and cares. He's the most devoted man I've met inawhile.

I jump into relationships quick. But I stay for awhile.


I think after 6 months he knows his feelings towards you and if he says he loves you believe it.

I wouldn’t make any big changes immediately but maybe spend half a day apart, then a day and gradually build it up. I can be a loner and sometimes play videogames but I would reduce that for a relationship.

I guess what I’m saying is don’t worry about him straying away. If he was to do it there is nothing you can do about it and you can’t control others so no point being stressed about it.

As for doing things you want to do maybe list some of them out and make some plans 🙂

Thank you for the reassurance. And you are right I can't control his feelings or what he does so I just have to believe him when he tells me he cares and likes me and doesn't wanna break up.

Also I like lists, lists are fun 😀


One thing I would say is don’t tell him all the time you are worried about him leaving. It’s sort of an insult to his loyalty and will get him thinking. However, if there’s a specific thing he can do like give a cuddle or hold hands then ask for it but don’t explain why.

Yes, lists are awesome and may take your mind off it too 😁

So then what do I do if I've already shared with him my fears of him leaving?


It’s nothing to worry about if you’ve only said it once or twice just don’t bring it up every day.

Oh, well...how about once a month for the last 6 months.??

Let's put it this way once a month there is always something I get insecure about 😣😔


Don’t sweat it. Like @jeane said he’s probably forgotten the past times you brought it up. Try to focus on the positives going forward 😊

I’m going to bed but if you have any other questions I’ll answer in the morning.
click to expand


I think you covered it all. Thanks for your input, appreciated.

Have a goodnight!
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