Do virgos fear rejecting others?

So this virgo man and I have been fwb for a while... I noticed sometimes if I ask if he has plans for weekend or if he wants to have dinner, he won't respond until past dinner time or after the weekend and tell me he had plans etc. It bugs me a little because if you have plans, why not just tell me when you read my text? And no, I never asked him why he responds late, and if he doesn't respond, I don't send him another text. I just would appreciate if he was more upfront about not being available to hang out and what not. I just don't understand.... is he worried that I would react poorly if he's not available? just busy? didn't care to reply? in a bad mood? What are your thoughts?

Posted by BalmyTigress
I've had this sort of experiences with Virgos as well. My last two miserably failed relationships were with Virgo men. I so would've loved to have an honest discussion about things not going well, but it was just impossible with those two. The funny thing is that both are still incredibly friendly and even loving towards me, but if I ever try to get to the bottom of why things didn't work out, I get to witness all possible evasion techniques. I've taken responsibility of the mistakes I made, but I'm not holding my breath in getting anything like that out of the Virgos :-)

I think they're just deadly afraid of any kind of confrontation or can't bare the idea that people get hurt in relationships. Ironically, with those tactics, they end up hurting the other person even more. But I guess it doesn't matter as long as they can bury their head in the sand and pretend it's not happening :-)

I totally agree with this--thanks for putting it so very aptly! It's exactly how I felt about August Virgo I stopped seeing last year. Virgos like to make out like we're the crazy ones--they never take responsibility for their part in anything! However, I still find that I am extremely attracted to them! I think maybe in the future I will be friends with a Virgo man but nothing beyond that. I have a blast with them and maybe that should be the extent of it.

Posted by harry99
Okay silly me just looked at your avi and saw the lil thingie so you're a Leo Cancer Aries
well that's interesting. How do you handle those opposing signs ijs water and fire damn and
I though I had it hard lol.

Do your emotions fluctuate between caring alot and then just not giving a damn?

Id =k 've just never been able to actually really do FWB I like commitment.

Yes, my emotions do fluctuate.. I didn't know it was because all the opposing signs.. haha

Posted by harry99
Okay just saw your previous thread so apparnetly I was right and you do have feelings for him.

Well never tell him cuz when you do he will be out the door so fast it'll give you whip
lash.

Like MV said if he sees you as nothing he'll be gone before you blink.

I'm hoping it works out but honestly this sort of union has a low success rate

How old are you if you don't mind me asking? ?

I'm asking because at a certain age most women realize that they can't do the whole hook up sex thing
and they stay away from it so that fact that you did this makes me think you're pretty young
I'm already aware that I can't do NSA sex so I don't even give people the time of day anymore
because these days it seems that that's all anyone under the age 70 wants so I'm just celibate
it's a hell of alot less painful than dealing with assholes. And no chance of disease or pregnancy
it's a win win

26. And I agree this isn't a very good situation. I just haven't been able to pull away. I'm not trying to hook him or pursue him....I think eventually this will just fade when he finds someone new.

Anyway, I do know that he sees me as nothing more than fwb. We don't do sex dates. We usually hang out with mutual friends or at parties and us two just go home together afterwards. I didn't think it was a big deal for me to ask him if he wants to have dinner and stuff...and I wasn't trying to "ask him out on a date" but maybe he felt otherwise. I'm just asking what's up like a "friend" would, and we do chat from time to time...how are you doing etc. I know virgos don't like confrontations, but I didn't think telling me you have plans is confrontation....I guess he is just keeping me close enough until he's done with me huh? Ha.

I guess what really has me confused is....eventually he will tell me he had plans that weekend, after the weekend passes. So what's the difference? Why wait a few days to reply? Why reply at all if you're so worried about "confrontation" ? :S

Posted by BalmyTigress

From now on, only shallow relationships with Virgos :-) They're great for that (as are us Aquas).

I hate that painful smile that people give to others after choosing to give in to sad revelations...the kind of smile that tells everyone who sees it that they have lost faith in trying, in others, and in themselves.


Just who does that fool?

Posted by BalmyTigress

Posted by Amandus

Posted by BalmyTigress

From now on, only shallow relationships with Virgos :-) They're great for that (as are us Aquas).

I hate that painful smile that people give to others after choosing to give in to sad revelations...the kind of smile that tells everyone who sees it that they have lost faith in trying, in others, and in themselves.


Just who does that fool?

Sorry?

There's no painful smile about any future relationships with Virgos. I don't feel like I've lost anything when it comes to people I do not even know yet.

I did get a lot of pain from the Virgo men, and I'll never be able to have just shallow relationships with them. Unfortunately.

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Tigress hou have lost nothing but have gained clarity. As many here have said maybe only a Capricorn or Taurus has the patience to put up with the way a Virgo is. Me, I'm lively full of life and not afraid of expressing how I feel. I'm also straight up if I'm not feeling you. Some Virgo's tend to hang on "just in case" and that ends up hurting the affected person. True it is not all Virgo's part; if you stay and put up with it then you're just as much at fault. Took me awhile with Aug Virgo but I finally cut my losses and jetted. However, as I stated before I am attracted to them because they are extremely intellectual, clever, witty, all that. That's a powerful aphrodisiac for me! But I have put things into perspective and know that I can only be friends with them. If I'm looking for anything else shame on me!

Posted by BalmyTigress
Oh, I do love my Virgo men deeply. I just always felt, and still do, like I never was good enough. It can be partly my own perception and lack of self-esteem, which I have overcome afterwards, but the events that happened kind of affirmed this for me. I have felt this not being good enough thing with pretty much all Virgos I've known. Interestingly, I do not feel like that with the Caps in my life, who can also be demanding. They don't mind if I'm not perfect, as long as I'm real.

I wish I would've stayed just friends with these two Virgo men, because then I could still enjoy them. Now I really can't, because as long as there is no real apology for the way they behaved, I don't have real respect for them. And if I would try to explain it like this to them, they would get very defensive and tell me that I should redirect my anger to something positive or something. I'm not really even angry (confrontation doesn't mean anger and unleashed wrath; just conversation between two adults). I just don't have much respect left and I think that's a shame, because I think they are such lovely people.

Ah yes, the defense mechanism. It's used to make it seem as if you're the blame for whatever is not going well! I know that move very well. If there's one thing I recognize it's when someone is bullshitting me. Aug Virgo would never answer a direct question; always thinking I was gunning for an argument. All I was seeking was answers. As you said just a simple conversation seemed too much for him. I'm sorry you felt as if you were not good enough. I was told many times by Aug Virgo that I thought I was too good. You know you will never get the apology--it's not in them. To apologize for being an ass would mean that they were not perfect and we all know that they are perfectionists and can do no wrong!

A relationship or just simple friendship should be easy. It's easy with the Virgo male if you're not sleeping with them. Most women tend to let the emotions get involved when sleeping with someone.

Someone said date a Gemini or a Libra...lol! I do have to say I had some wonderful times with Libra and Aqua men. No issues easy breezy; conversations, debates, hey...

It's just FWB. He replied after the weeked because he was too busy with other girls over the weekend.
I only reply when I feel like replying(or not reply at all), when I don't care about the person. So yes he didn't care to respond and didn't care if u feel disrespected.

Posted by harry99

Posted by julyocean

Posted by harry99

....I guess he is just keeping me close enough until he's done with me huh? Ha.

yes hun I'm sorry you're dealing with this

I'm only a year older than you 27 but I've learned REAL quick that the new "hook-up"
movement isn't for me. I lost all my friends AAALLLLL of them after I started having sex.
Sex is not "meaningless" it causes a bond especially in women and it creates life and it
can pass diseases that will kill you or ruin your life forever. So recap he's using you
say fuck you to this asshole and move on with your life...find someone who ACTUALLY
LIKES YOU hun MOOOOVE ON yes that is an order and I know you're a Leo you may want to did
your heels in ....don't, pay attention to all of the obvious signs and all the women who
have been through this so that we can give you advice and save you the pain.

I you're still trying to hold on watch the movie He's Just Not That Into You.
And then watch it like 5 more times until that butter sinks in for real.


This situation is even worse because the guy is a Virgo, damn them and their charm.
You have to realize that in his head he's thinking really mean things about you,
is blatantly saying fuck you to you, is not innocent or sweet but is actually evil.
Think whatever you need to think in order to get pissed off enough that you can
leave him forever. Trust me I've been there and I know it's hard but you have to do it.
Find something to hate about him and then get mad and disgusted and just say
"damn I'm amazing I deserve better than this, fuck this piece of shit asshole fuck him
fuck him" You have too much worth to be treated like this.

You can do it

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Thanks for your advice.. I hope I can move on too.

Posted by Lenore0908
Well just stop asking him out on dates. That is the mans job, unless he asks most of the time already. Stop asking to "hang out". Don't analyze why he won't go. He won't go because
He does not want to. It's that simple!!

Stop leading and initiating. That is the mans job MOST of the time.

And I know it's your life but why do you have a F buddy, missy?? That's trashy! He's not gonna respect you!!! You are settling for crumbs...stop it!!

Disclaimer: I am not a love doctor and have never played one on TV. all opinions are only my own and are not meant to be forced on anyone else.

I'm not analyzing why he won't go. I just wish he's more direct and if you are busy/don't feel like hanging out, just say so. Oh well, these men do what they want huh.

I know this is not a good situation and it's doomed from the start...call me naive or foolish...but I've never been so physically attracted to someone before. And as we spend more time together and once in a while he opens up a little I come to see the good sides of him and how he cares a lot for others (when he wants to of course)and other qualities that I admire about him. Needless to say I won't consider doing this with anyone else in the future because now I know better.

I don't consider him to be evil, after all he's just taking what I willingly give anyway.

I only do this whenever I'm UNCERTAIN... 🙂

Posted by GemStar05

Posted by BalmyTigress
I've had this sort of experiences with Virgos as well. My last two miserably failed relationships were with Virgo men. I so would've loved to have an honest discussion about things not going well, but it was just impossible with those two. The funny thing is that both are still incredibly friendly and even loving towards me, but if I ever try to get to the bottom of why things didn't work out, I get to witness all possible evasion techniques. I've taken responsibility of the mistakes I made, but I'm not holding my breath in getting anything like that out of the Virgos :-)

I think they're just deadly afraid of any kind of confrontation or can't bare the idea that people get hurt in relationships. Ironically, with those tactics, they end up hurting the other person even more. But I guess it doesn't matter as long as they can bury their head in the sand and pretend it's not happening :-)

I totally agree with this--thanks for putting it so very aptly! It's exactly how I felt about August Virgo I stopped seeing last year. Virgos like to make out like we're the crazy ones--they never take responsibility for their part in anything! However, I still find that I am extremely attracted to them! I think maybe in the future I will be friends with a Virgo man but nothing beyond that. I have a blast with them and maybe that should be the extent of it.

click to expand

Personally, I will admit if I am in the wrong, after exhausting myself trying to come up with any reason why I am NOT in the wrong. If I can't, I will admit I'm wrong, and apologize.