Just for the fuck of it :/

So it's 2:30am, and sleep is the last thing on my mind. I can't point out just one thought going through my brain, truthfully every time I try to single one thought out, a million more surround it. I honestly have no clue who I am, or what I'm doing. I'm at a point in my life where I have to decide, doesn't sound too hard written down, but the stress is the cause of all the bad habits in my life. I'm in a situation where I dislike where I live very much, I moved here my senior year of high school, just so I would be able to graduate. I am not attending school right now, as I have a lot on my plate and I would like my life to be somewhat in order before hand. I have to decide by June, if not sooner, what path my life is going take. Lets split my choices up in groups.

Choice A - Stay where I currently live, cost of living is not bad at all, currently employed, my father and siblings live here(for now.) I have been here for 3 years, enough time to realize that this is not where I want to be. This may not be a good thing, but I get bored living in one place for too long, and it has been too long, I work my ass off, and every penny goes to bills, which I know is life, but fuck, a roommate or somethin would be great, but that is for another choice.

Choice B - Move to a city only 2 hours away from where I currently live, very country, don't feel comfortable explaining all the details in this choice, but it involves a female, and honestly, unless I'm talking to her, doesn't seem like the most healthiest decisions for myself.

Choice C - Military. Now I have been doing my research on this decision for quite sometime, now while I hate the government and all the corrupt bullshit they are apart of, there are some great opportunities if done the right way, I would just feel like such a hypocrite being part of something I despise so fuckin much, and to add another aspect, I am a (educated) smoker, and the whole drug test aspect just ruins it for me.

Choice D - Move to the westcoast, now this decision is kind of a spur of the moment idea, no idea where, no idea how, I just wanna save up some money, and take a road trip to maybe Oregon and live there for a few years, I do know some people that will be moving to Oregon this summer, that I could room with, and maybe be in a position to go back to school and save some money at the same time.

Choice E - Now this decision is in it's early stages, but is one of the most promising. Moving to maryland, now I know two people who are looking for a third roommate to split the bills with, it's a new place, where I seem to feel the most comfortable, it's not as far away as the west coast is from what family I have, and the people looking for a roommate seem to really be planning this out, and I have already been looking at jobs up there, and it looks like it might actaully work.



Now, before choosing what the FUCK I am going to do, I have to find a way to save some money until June, then go whereever I decide to go, but in the situation I'm in now saving money is nearly impossible, and by the time my lease is up, I will have nothing, if that. I was thinking about moving out of this bullshit apartment and moving in with my dad, so I could work and maybe pay a few bills here and there, then once June onces, I'm gone, problem with that is, my father is not very stable, and who knows where he will be a week/month/3months from now, plus I don't wanna be stuck paying ALL the bills.

Or I could move back in with my crazy ass mom and help her with whatever she needs help with until June, then go off and do what I need to do. Problem with that is, I wouldn't get to keep my job I have now, and would have to find a whole new one if I moved in with her, which could take months.


So, to end my rant......fuck my head hurts.

lol @ treetrunk

you worry to much take it easy and the right choice will come to you in due time whats the rush no need to cross the finish line you have plenty of time to cross it.

Hey Welcome Solojunior,
Yes,it would be good to have your direction settled and working towards it,even if you put 20.00 dollars a week away,it adds up quickly.You sound excited about Maryland.What are the costs associated with each move?License/id renewal?Moving your stuff?Are there lots of things to do in each place?How long do you have to be a resident of a particular state before you can get an instate tuition rate?Will each state take your school credits or will you have to do extra classes to get into their system?What are the top ten vocations that you like?Have you thought about a career where you travel alot but having a place where you can call home?Can you get started in anyone of these fields where you are going or staying?Have you lived with these people in OR/MD before?This is a great time in your life to travel when you aren't tied down to a wife and family and house.This is a good time in your life for do overs.I know you didn't ask LOL but based on info you gave,here is my ranking for your choices: E,D,Mother,Stay ;get roomate,C,B,Father.Yup I can sum it up just like that because it isn't my decision to make. Can you be content until you are happy?It's in the cards for Virgos and change/travel this year.It is good that you care about your life.

Take whichever choice is the doomiest .... your life will end up in doom anyway, so you might as well help it along.

People really believe in this in due time crap? Everyday I wait on deciding on my future is another day lost, I can't help but be in a rush, and I'm sorry to everybody, I wasn't really looking for an answer, just needed to get it off my chest, thanks for all the replies tho.

To summarize what I wrote......."I don't wanna be like P-Angel in 30 years"

You seem to share my instant gratification perk. Don't mind working for it if it's going to yield positive results and quick. I think these choices can have different levels of "adulthood" associated with each one. Moving in with buddies?!? Wtf? Where are you going in life? You wanna be the guy on your buddies couch? The only was I would ever recommend that scenario is if they are truly a positive influence. i.e. they push the crap out of you to get some schooling behind you; they tough love you and tell you what you need to hear and not what pacifies you. Doubt your friends up there are truly like that so I believe that scenario to be a step backwards in life.

Moving in with a female is probably going to feel great but how long have you known her?

The military (even though I am also against it) might be a great avenue at this point in your life. One of my best friends came back VERY changed for the better but still the same Steve. Now just a few years later he's married to a beautiful wife, has a lovely home, and a beautiful daughter. Totally going to contradict myself here but he actually was the guy on MY couch for 7 months before he aspired to join the military lol. But I was that good friend that is hard to come by because I did push him.

I'm not opposed either to moving in with parents as long as neither of you take advantage of the other. You move in with a date in mind of moving out or earlier. You pull your weight plus extra when possible. Don't just pay them money for rent. Extra chores. Make dinner. Converse with them. You are not there to take up space for as much time as you want. Technically they should've been done with you and cut the apron strings after you turned 18. On the other side, be smart. Know when you're being taken advantage of and where the rent money is going.

Your mom's probably gonna brow beat me over the internet but I recommend the military. I believe it to be corrupt only at the higher levels and politics influenced but there's so much more to weigh over that. You get a great workout which you will have a greater respect for yourself and your self-image and self-confidence will jump to probably somewhere it's never been before (Just don't get c0cky). There's brotherhood and comradery. Maybe true friends that you will still be talking to and visiting 20 years from now. Survival skills. College education. Discipline. Tour the world. Respect. You be the judge.

And that's not what P meant. Read anything she says, then re-read it, then again and again until the message sinks in. You sound confused right now with your choices at hand. You manifest what you envision. You go into any of these choices with negative thoughts as a potential outcome then you will manifest that nightmare. You need to know what you want and go into it with a good frame of mind and confidence in your decision. She may be the wisest person on here but if you don't look through her "b1tchiness" you will never receive the message. Sorry P. Not lashing I hope you can tell.

Well, I will immediately say I avoid choice c at all costs. I feel we have the same view points here. And it's not that I hate it so much (my whole family has been in the military), but I could never see myself as being part of it. I'd be miserable. I'm assuming you feel the same, and honestly, while it would pay the bills, you probably wouldn't work as efficiently as you might think if you're heart isn't in it.

Personally, E seems to be the most reasonable. You wouldn't be completely out of yourr element andr you get to be with others,but choice D is possible after a point. Maybe after a couple of years of finding yourself, you can move on to something completely new. Now, if you really want to just throw caution to the wind to find yourself, choice D.

Bear with me on this one Solo. But I think one of the best ways to learn, is to teach. Get out there and roam the different threads. Listen to people's strifes. Read the advice and the outcomes. Throw in your two cents based on expereience and morals and passion. Don't act like you know EXACTLY what they're going through but sympathize with them if it is due. Keep an eye out for situations where they are in fact the cause of their own strife and what decisions they made to get themselves there. Go help and you will in turn help yourself.

I plan on scoring high enough on my asvab, that I will not actually have to physically kill people, even though I will be associated with an organization that does on a daily basis.

But to answer your question, I'd have no problem with it truthfully.

I'm just a very confused individual.

And yes, I would be miserable in the military, but like you said, it's about paying the bills.

Solo listen to that man above, I'm probably a lot older than he but couldn't give a fifth of that advice, ok so you were venting off with good reason....listen and take on board.

OP3=Kudos....

I'm moved by your advice OP3 as I was by 25ths and Candeh on the how do you feel about children thread..Honest, straightforward

^ That's great. Take to heart what everyone has said, please and thank you.

Oh Solo, I understand what a tough spot you are in and I am sorry. 😢 My daughter is feeling the same at this time and these are tough choices to make.
I think you sound very positive about option E and in the meantime staying with your mother may help. Start checking out jobs tomorrow on craigslist and other sources where your mother is at. Make sure you help her in other ways and agree on what you would pay beforehand so there is no outlandish ideas of what you will pay and then end up not being able to save anything.
I think OP3 and Decan had some good things to say along with a number of others. I think you do have to keep a positive mind frame and keep what you are thinking and speaking of on the positive and going somewhere level b/c the law of attraction definitely works as OP3 was pointing out. You have your whole life ahead of you and so many endless opportunities! I have to say that I think some kind of schooling is important and can make a difference in quality of life later on so if you have a chance to finish a degree I would say 'go for it!'.
Keep your head up and know that it's great that you even have the right and ability to 'choose' what you do with your life and try and live each day with purpose and make sure and have a dash of happiness or more if possible thrown into the mix! Good luck! 😄

@25th,that some deep crap,here*hands him a cold beer and gold star*Have you tried a good neck massage/then wrap in hot towel for toning you neck/facial muscles?I can't give you keys to your future ,you have them already!