So Confused!

My story goes like this. My husband cheated on me and I went on craig's list looking for something not sure what, but something. I saw an ad that read..."wife cheated looking for revenge". I immediately responded. We talk for about 2 months everyday and few times a day... Finally we meet in person but I liked him so much as a friend I was afraid to let it go any further...I couldn't resist and kissed him. From then on, we spent almost everyday together he made me feel amazing... he was amazing. Due to our situations we have ran into some problems alot of insecurties from both of us. He started getting distance & I pushed him and he said he missed "some" things about his ex, I asked if you though about getting together with her and he said "sometimes". I told him we should break up then. I later told him I made a mistake and didn't want to lose him, and he told me he needed to find himself and I did too. We were the "right people, but wrong time". He told him he loves me and will I will always have a piece of his heart. Oh two days later, his wife was at his apt and I told him I was coming over.. he said no.. she was there.. I got really upset. It's just been a mess.....

Okay so an update... he brings me the rest of my stuff today. We make out alittle bit (but didn't sleep together). He tells me "just one last time I want to feel that closeness to you" and "if only it was a year later". I told him I would be here if the needed me and to go to what he has to do (which is really hard for me.. I'm an aries with a very aggresive personality). Then he tells me that he can't see me for awhile he cares to much and it would be too hard.

PLease tell me what to do...

Walk away.

Please don't be this man's doormat. You're an Aries! Act like it! He goes back to his ex, you allow him access to your body, he effectively ends the relationship and then you say you will be waiting for him?! What?! Why?! You don't feel you can do better than a wishy-washy man who probably just wanted a quick hookup to begin with?

lol

Maybe you should look on Craig's list for the answer to your life problems, lol.

Wow.. that was really rude P-Angel.. must be nice to be you and have no problems or have your husband cheat on you for 9 mo!!

Aries, both this Virgo and your husband sound like asses. I say shake them both off and move on.

Pee IS rude!! no news about that. she is fucking non-feeling woman. I don't think she's EVER experienced orgasm.


your story is sad. Seems like he ended in between two but went the old path, however, love... once over.. you know it is over. I don't think he will keep that relation and you may find him at your doorstep.

Just think what you would thereafter.

Just think what you would DO thereafter..

would you accept him or let him... ?

Disconnecting from one another and taking care of your own life problems seperately for now is best, may be in the future then it will work if it is a genuine connection. But right you both should committ to taking care of your own life style situations. Go on with your life, if its meant it will be. Your married? he's married, nothing can work from this. He needs to cut ties in his life and take control of it, till he does that and reflects on why his marriage failed..nothing positive can come that is stable regardless of his feelings for you. Neither of you are ready to be together in a relationship of anything that is emotional or committed.

Man o man,
Aries, Do I know this story w/a "use to be friend". She like you, did the same and it never ended, the "revenge" fucks. And she too hurt herself, she ended up on drugs, divorced, treated like the "ho" she had became which hurt more, and in prison. Of course there is so much more to the years of this that went on, but, stop now, gather your self respect, and leave the men in the dust, decide what you want out of life and how you will obtain it. I could go on and on about all this i have read here from watching her life go from "wonderful mother and wife" to "belongs in prison" and oh how sad to watch and not be able to help her more than i did. Lots of folks hurt for her, but stood beside her, enabling her into every bad situation. SAD!
Let me tell you too, she was a STRONG minded woman, never realizing her weakness was lack of self!

What's so rude about the truth?


You run to Craig's list to solve your life issue of being hurt from a cheating man, to find a cheating man ... and want him.


What?

You came in here to be rescued from yourself?

That's what you did at Craig's list to, I gather.

Why don't you try helping yourself, using your own logic and intelligence and maturity.

I see no difference here ..... you want someone to save you from your own stupidity.

Dont' worry, there are plenty of people dumb enough in here to believe you need to be saved by them, because they will have no clue that your only true answer lies in yourself, and the choices you make for yourself .. they won't know this, and will think your life course is depenedent upon these other people you need resucing from.

"have your husband cheat on you for 9 mo!!"



Well, if he did .... I guess I would always have Craig's List to turn to, to look for a re-bound fuck, and then be stupid enough to believe it should be heart-felt and freak out when it's not .. so turn to another internet site to be saved again.


That would always be my option .. like you took.

You know what I think is rude?



When a woman emotionally falls for a fuck-buddy, and then attempts to hold him accountible to these feelings of hers, as if it's his responsibility that she is burdened emotional chaos.

Well, I think she should just go to Craig's list .. maybe there she could find a fuck-buddy to help her get over her cheating fuck-buddy, who helped her cope with a cheating husband.

Apparantly .. on Craig's List, a person can find whores ... he found her.

Just to clear things up... I have moved out on my own and do have an attorney and he has moved out also. We did not start anything physical until I had moved out and then he did not shortly after. Until we were both supposedly sure it was over with our ex's, or at least I was sure. He apparently wasn't.

I don't necessarily want to be rescued, just opinions. I am going through a very hard time. I have a young son that I don't get to see and have to shard with an asshole that cheated on me. So now I get him m-f and every other weekend.

So sorry if my life isnt perfect like your P-Angel... there is such a thing as compassion. Sometimes people want a thrid part to vent to. Someone who doesn't know them.

You can think I'm pathetic, or dependent or whatever... I'm just confused and hurt right now. Sometimes life just hits you hard and messes with your pyscy.

Or sure I wanted to leave my husband... there is no why I would want to stay in a marriage where someone would cheat on me. We were actually drinking and laughing at some of the stuff on Craig List and I saw his ad and thought why not... He turned out, I thought to be a really nice normal guy.

So wait you don't have full custody? He's the one that cheated so why aren't you the one with full custody and him with visitations? Maybe theres more than cheating going on, if your life is found unstable then that means you wouldn't get full custody rights plus anyone who goes on craiglist hoping for a relationship is not playing with full marbles, that's a breeding ground for hook ups, sex addicts and angry men that are socially crippled.

I do have full custody and he gets him every other weekend, but that still sucks he is still my baby. I don't like not having him all the time. Its really hard. And I didn't go on there looking for a relationship I didn't know what I wanted. Revenge... I guess... it just turned into a relationship I dont know how... its not liked I planned it. I can't explain the craigs list thing... It was something stupid... that even isn't the point here....and I'm not an unstable person. JUst a confused and hurt person

ditch Craigslist, that man sold you a bunch of bullshit, he was never leaving his wife, he just wanted some TLC until he got his wife back into his life, now please take some much needed time to heal from the pain your husband caused and heal from the pain this man caused you as well. Rebounds are good for the ego but hardly work out long term.

"I have a young son that I don't get to see"

"I do have full custody"





Which is it? Make up your mind.





"I didn't know what I wanted. Revenge... I guess... it just turned into a relationship I dont know how... its not liked I planned it."


You don't have a relationship, except in your head .. so, this would explain you not knowing how you're in one, because you're not.

You are in being used, and a user ....... for personal gain, because you both got burnt and needed nurturing, so you used each other.



Revenge just came up behind you and kicked your ass ........ as karma is supposed to do. Next time, I would suggest you use your common sense to rely on instead of chaotic, messy emotions that lead you to be jealous/paranoid, which leads you to do stupid things .... such as we see here.