OKs really fn slow in here tonight. Hopefully you are calm about it. I'd ask some more qs but after thinking about it a while, is it possible that w certain people, you get to feeling close or "deep" as you say, then the level of investment enters an emotional area which is perhaps wounded for you, because the last time you were in this emotional vulnerability w someone there was damage done. So even tho you are older now and the person+circumstances are different, your deeper level reaction is the same cos it's still painful in there. Hope that makes sense ..using phone..