Should I officially give up on this Aquarius man?

Hey all, this is my first time on a forum. I have gotten to the point where I actually want some online friendly advice, away from people that I know. Anyways, I'm a cancer man and I'm a bisexual. The man I like is a gay Aquarius man. Everyone knows he's gay and he even says he's only gay so there's no question about it. Anyways this story goes on since last semester in college. I'm a sophomore and he's a freshman, both of us have the same exact major.

For the first part of the story I use to not always be open about my sexuality. In fact I wasn't open at all until one person forcefully told everyone and got me kicked out of a fraternity for revenge. A Scorpio man. I harassed him through his phone- wasn't proud of it. more than 70% of my messages were about hanging out and stuff and he constantly ignored me and told me to stop through the messages after ignoring me every other day or so. It drove me mad when I kept getting ignored. Anyways, I've accepted my punishment but he carried it too far when he destroyed my reputation and got me kicked out of the fraternity for saying things that weren't true and no one would come to me and ask for anything. He even said I tried attacking his reputation which I never did.

The story continues shortly after I got kicked out I felt completely depressed until this freshman aqua man started randomly messaging me on facebook. I only know him cause I've seen him around. I originally had no intention to talk to him but after a half hour of crying to myself I've decided to give him a shot. I applaud him for even trying as I knew what he was after. Anyways, we started hitting it off. We both were part of the same musical and everything. He was joining the same fraternity that I got kicked out of and when he told someone that he had a thing for me that person told him what I had done. He ignored it and never mentioned it to me. We kept going on fine. He kept contacting me and contacting me and it actually kept me at ease. He invited me to a lot of things and with his new friend which was a girl. She had connections to this fraternity and every time I was around she kept saying "Isn't it great that you're going to become a..." and kept going on about the fraternity and it kept stinging me. He knew, but he wouldn't say anything to stop it. She kept hanging all over him and stuff. To the point where you would think that they were couples. He's invited me to his room multiple times and we've slept together a lot. I never had much of a complain as I didn't want to make him do anything he didn't want naturally. He did everything I enjoyed just naturally. Except a few times when he hung out he kept saying he missed so and so and then cause me to go travel with him to visit this person. Had no problems, but then he would spend there ignoring me and full attention to this girl. And one time he did a study thing with her when we were supposed to hang out. I left cause I couldn't take it. I didn't want to say anything tho

And then one time I asked if he could go get food. And he said no, but when this girl arrived and she was hungry he instantly suggested going to get food. I went along, but it stung. I doubt he realized it. All these little things started adding up. Finally, during NME he was perfectly fine. He kept in normal contact and everything. When I kept getting depressed he helped me stay happy cause some of the immature fraternity men kept acting like shit to me. Which bothers me cause someone among them did the same thing to a woman and always talks about how he's going to sleep with this girl and that when all I did was like someone TOO much. Anyways, the second week occurred and the contact became very little. To the extreme. He wouldn't ask to hang out, I kept acting like everything's fine. I knew how time consuming NME is so I tried ignoring it as much as possible. What got me was the day after NME his first instinct was to hang out with this girl over me. He spent hours with her before he even decided to contact me to hang out. That hurt a lot. I declined it. He knew I was on campus all day- I'm a commuter- and by that time I was already home. The next day I couldn't take it anymore and finally told him I think we should have a break. I gave a whole thing about how everything was bothering me. There was one message in particular that he took extreme offense to and it was about the girl. All I said was that they looked like couples and that they could be making out in the back seat of the car. It's a horrible reply of me. After I sent the message I felt so relieved and felt sorry. I know the next couple days I kept drowning to meet him and hang out and find a way to make up for my actions, but he started to decline and wouldn't do anything with me. Finally one day he said "I've been thinking about this but let's just be friends." I panicked from that. I ended up not showing up to the lunch thing I asked him to go. I went on to avoiding him cause I was extremely hurt. He ended up telling this girl about what happened and she spread to other people and it came back to me as he was talking bad about me behind my back.

A few days later of ignoring he asked me if I was alright. I gave him simple replies which made him mad. Over night I felt guilty again and in the morning I sent him a huge message saying how I still feel for him. He ignored it and soon starting ignoring me more. The movie that he said we would go to- he never told me that he couldn't go anymore cause he's going with his father to see the movie. Which was fine, but it made me upset that he couldn't have at least told me. Then he grew distant and cold. Barely two weeks later he already started talking to someone else and that crushed my heart even more. When I broke up with my ex last time I made sure to give it a good while for me and for the other person.

For the rest of last semester I tried asking him to do something with me every once and a while but he rejected them all, but wo

Let him go for you, and no one else. One of the hardest things for water signs to accept is that air signs love friends/family/lovers on an even playing field. The measure of an Aqua's affection is not how much outward energy is expelled, as it's more or less a natural state for us, but by how much we allow others in. It sounds like he was there for you, when you needed someone, but it was more of a transitional relationship, so keep the good memories, and keep doing you.

Posted by Gennie
Let him go for you, and no one else. One of the hardest things for water signs to accept is that air signs love friends/family/lovers on an even playing field. The measure of an Aqua's affection is not how much outward energy is expelled, as it's more or less a natural state for us, but by how much we allow others in. It sounds like he was there for you, when you needed someone, but it was more of a transitional relationship, so keep the good memories, and keep doing you.

um my husband is not air sun or moon nor does he have air dominant, infact LACKS air.

and he loves his family very much. if im gonna try to compete for that, then I shouldn't be in a relationship because people who are so competitive like that about family are ridiculous.

seriously what kind of ridiculousness is this that it's situated to elements?

The next day I couldn't take it anymore and finally told him I think we should have a break. I gave a whole thing about how everything was bothering me. There was one message in particular that he took extreme offense to and it was about the girl. All I said was that they looked like couples and that they could be making out in the back seat of the car. It's a horrible reply of me. After I sent the message I felt so relieved and felt sorry. I know the next couple days I kept drowning to meet him and hang out and find a way to make up for my actions, but he started to decline and wouldn't do anything with me. Finally one day he said "I've been thinking about this but let's just be friends." I panicked from that. I ended up not showing up to the lunch thing I asked him to go. I went on to avoiding him cause I was extremely hurt. He ended up telling this girl about what happened and she spread to other people and it came back to me as he was talking bad about me behind my back"


--- yeah i'd forget him.

he's an idiot. he has lost respect for you, but he talks behind your back. just let him go.

I believe he was just hoping for an "exit"...

cause even if you said what you said,and he wants/desires you/likes you, it wouldn't matter.

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by Gennie
Let him go for you, and no one else. One of the hardest things for water signs to accept is that air signs love friends/family/lovers on an even playing field. The measure of an Aqua's affection is not how much outward energy is expelled, as it's more or less a natural state for us, but by how much we allow others in. It sounds like he was there for you, when you needed someone, but it was more of a transitional relationship, so keep the good memories, and keep doing you.

um my husband is not air sun or moon nor does he have air dominant, infact LACKS air.

and he loves his family very much. if im gonna try to compete for that, then I shouldn't be in a relationship because people who are so competitive like that about family are ridiculous.

seriously what kind of ridiculousness is this that it's situated to elements?

click to expand

The existence of love is not the same as the expression of it Liz. As for why the elements, Liz, how many times have someone come to the Gem or Aqua boards asking "why does this person treat me like everyone else!!! why wont he/she love ONLY me!!??"

I can see how he has lost respect to me. It's frustrating, but hold on- there's more to the story. I didn't realize that my comment was cut in half and the other half didn't get posted.

For the rest of last semester I tried asking him to do something with me every once and a while but he rejected them all. It frustrated me cause I would see him on other people's snap chat's of him hanging out with people and that hurt a lot. One day finally I confronted him to see if he wanted to watch a musical- you see he loves musicals- he said later tonight. He disappeared sometime during the night which I didn't care too much. But when it was starting getting late I tried asking him if we were still watching the musical. No reply. I waited for a few hours and still no reply. Finally I gave up and decided to go home and before I left campus I said goodnight. And then he replied saying goodnight immediately. Ignoring everything else that I had asked.

Winter break has been approaching and by now I have gotten to the point where I didn't know how to act around him when I see him in public. I tried staying distant- he barely replies and stuff. Finally we went on a school trip to New York. We didn't hang out but he randomly texted me to compliment me on my new clothes that I had got. And whenever I wore it that day he kept staring at me. It kept giving me the mixed signal that he still likes me but is afraid to admit it or get hurt again. After getting back I tried contacting him for two weeks during winter break. He still ignored half the messages- when all I was doing was trying to have a conversation. I finally snapped at him cause when I didn't want to answer him in the past I did it for him and not for me. And his reply was "I just feel that I don't really need to talk." which was bullshit because I know he's always talking to everyone else. He's always on his phone. I gave up on him and started talking to other people on social media and it actually got my mind away from him and over him temporarily. I had no intention of getting back to him.

The week of this semester that was about to begin he randomly contacted me to see if I was in so and so's class. I waited a long time before responding to him but then felt too guilty to ignore it. And so I did. Simple answers and such. We still didn't talk much, but then one day we got into snap chatting each other and it went to a ridiculous amount. It peaked my curiosity cause after ignoring for so long he was actually conversing. It ended up having me in his room and had fun. No regrets there haha. After that he started to ignore me all over again just like normally, but emotions started to stir up inside me again. for a while we would talk on and off. If something I noticed was up I made sure that he was doing alright. Of course he would never give any details about anything. A few times he would do the same if I was extremely down and he would ask what's wrong. I didn't go as far as tell him what's wrong but I appreciated the concern.

One night I was deeply thinking about the hottest thing he did to me. I wrote it down, asked if he wanted to read it and then I sent it to him. It turned him on and he decided to ask if I wanted to come over the next day. I was all for it. Although I was afraid he might back out. I mention it right in the morning something about it and he starts to immediately ask me if we should do this. If it felt right- he wants to do it though. Which confused me on how to answer this. It would continue to stall all day long until it was too late where he didn't want to get out of bed to let me in- even though he says he wants to do it. Then he said the next day and then the next till finally he said never cause I kept asking. Which I was like fine- if that's how you feel then whatever. I wasn't going to ask anymore and I stopped, but it hurt only cause he originally said we would and kept pushing and pushing it back until he either got annoyed or didn't want to do it anymore. But then at least a month later he randomly text me to see if I'm busy that evening and we hung out and did much more. Another words he sets everything up on his terms which bothers me tremendously.

He would randomly, during rehearsals- we were practicing with rapier and daggers, he would come up and try playing around a bit by pretending to slice me open. I have a bunch of other people who play around with me like that but he kept joining in every once in a while, not much though. And then I would notice that people he would never talk to he starts talking to and getting to know- to me it would be normal but it would always be after he notices me hanging out with these people for so long. It feels like he's trying to steal my friends at times. Then one time he randomly texted me cause he was concern about something. He thought I might have gotten arrested cause he saw someone that looked like me getting arrested. It showed that he cared an amount that he even did something like that. Normal people who don't care just don't text someone to see if everything's alright. I also found out that he defended the crap out of me the previous semester when he still liked me when certain people kept trying to tell him I was a terrible person. I wish I knew that back then cause my heart melted when I heard that.

Then two weeks ago- during a night I was about to have a mental break down from all the stress- from the crap I have to deal with from certain members of the old fraternity I use to be a part of- I started to ask if he wanted to hang out. I've been just wanting to do simple things such as movies or going off to do something- but he declined it saying that he's going to be too busy. I couldn't take the rejection anymore cause it hurt so much. I knew that's false cause I see him constantly hanging out with people. And what do you know- today during finals week I see him hanging out and finding time with everyone else. I ended up snapping at him that night. Saying that's false. I know he's going to hang out with everyone else. He kept saying ok over and over again. He said he's going to just keep saying it cause I wanted to get a reaction from him. So then I told him I don't really care for his reaction, a small conversation started and then I ended up telling him how I felt. I have sincerely talked to numerous people but I haven't felt as strong of a connection to them as him. He didn't reply or anything. Ignored it. I ended it as that that night.

He would have small talk here and there with me- but pretty much nothing. I asked him out one more time and he rejected it. Finally I told him that this summer I'm going to work on getting rid of my emotions for him starting that night. I saw that he saw the message and took at least a good ten minutes before replying. I don't know if he was deciding on what to say or if he was partially distracted. Either way, his response was "Okay. Whatever you say." And then the next day he liked my instagram photo. Something that he rarely does. He did it the previous day too. I don't know if I'm reading too much into everything but I've been ignoring him. I noticed that he hasn't been looking at my snap chat stories until last night when I went karaoke with my friends. Shortly after a picture on instagram or facebook was released he looked at my snap chat story.

Basically- is it worth to even wait for him behind the scenes or just to move on completely cause if he's going to do this now, what's to stop him if he came back later to end up doing it all over again?

Libra Woman who has dated an Aqua Man for two years- what I can tell you is that they are STUBBORN as all HELL when it comes to them revealing their emotions or even knowing where you stand with them in the relationship, you will think they have no emotion! But... deep down in the darkness of their heart somewhere, if they really do care about you, you will know in their very strange expressive way (like when you mentioned liking your Instagram photo, keeping track of your snapchat, etc.)

You'll wait until the end of time behind the scenes for him, so I suggest to move on at this point and do your thing. Aquas like to be in control of the situation despite the fact if they wear a poker face with their hearts. They definitely live up to the saying that if you let your loved one go and they come back to you, then they truly do love you.

You want something from him, a method of relating, that isn't the way Aquas operate. There is a lot of dramatic overtones to your story, and I am not asserting that that is a bad thing. This is your form of expression, but Aquas, especially the guys, really really hate emotional displays in public or in texts. A lot of folks will look at this thread and say you don't sound emotional, and they would be right to an extent.

Your Aqua guy could have a ton of air in his chart, which means feelings and relationships are approached from a thinking standpoint.

Ok, it's been two days since I've even tried contacting him. Sunday night I sent him a long message explaining a lot of things and then went on about how I'm not going to contact him for personal mental health reasons. Although I told him that if he contacts me he has to tell me if there's no absolute way that a relationship is even possible and if he doesn't then I'm going to assume that there is. Haven't heard from him at all. No complains. I figured everything would turn out this way and if he does respond it'll be a good month before he does. The only message I received was thanks for the letter- before he had a chance to read it. I'm not complaining but now it seems that he's avoiding me. I just get that feeling. I saw him yesterday and today around campus but he easily turned his head and ignored me. Although I caught a few glances. Today though we went bowling. Not together. It was a class thing. He's normally real flirty and talkative with the girls but most of the time he was real quiet. I kept seeing him glance at me the entire time. I'm curious from another Aquarius stand point on what possibly could be going through his head. Is he confused in his emotions? Did I scare him off a bit? Or what?

If hes causing you this much grief, emotional turmoil, worry, and ignoring you (rude) one minute, then having sex with you the next, id just completely leave him alone, then eventually you'll have you answer.
Don't be so bothered by things he does, over analysing everything will only make you appear obsessed and needy sometimes, chill and just let things 'be' ok get on with your own life, there's someone great out there for you, it doesn't sound like him, in my opinion anyway x

Which is why I'm not communicating to him anymore cause I don't want to go down the obsession path. It's not good for me or him. I do agree too that he might not be for me which is ashamed because I really like him ”.