*Update---Loosing Patience

SO!
As you read before, Ms. Aqua is Hurt and Upset about my speaking with My Ex. But she has come a around very slightly. What irritates me is that we ARE NOT together, but we text and almost speak everyday. When we did see eachother, she couldnt keep her hands off of me, and it was very intimate.
I gave her a promise ring when things were still distant, and she declined. When we met up recently, she said she wanted the ring. So I gave it to her.

She went out with some friends, and decided to show it off and mentioned her "EX" (as in me) gave it to her. So I called her out on how do you accept a "promise ring" from an ex, so she responds and said we are working towards the promises you offered with the ring, i dont want to rush back into anything. She is also up for a HUGE promotion, and with this she said she can only think of me and her mother, when the income increases. :/

SO! When shes ready she still wants a future? But shes trying So So Hard to stand her ground on being "TOUGH" But its turning me off and pushing me away.

At this point shes coming closer, but what do I do now? Stay busy? Stay away? WHAT?
An old fling from HS offererd me to join them on a trip to Atlanta, I want to go because Hey just for fun! But I still have a Foot in Aqua world :/....

Your entitled to your opinion.
When i first gave it to her, she said she didnt want to take it to give me the impression that things are better.


You could have a point, but through our entire time together, she gave alot, and hardley took from me. So a ring she can buy herself I doubt its just to have the ring...But time will tell.

Shes really not the type...But I think she said that because she wants to tell herself she made the right decision and she wants me to know , it is over until further notice.

If you have the time visit the aquarius forum, page 2....
I posted something not too long ago.

Sounds like a power trip to me. 😢

It definitely sounds like a power trip! I feel the worst because I know that if she didn't see that we would have still been good.
I'm not sure about Atlanta because I wouldn't want to hurt her I wouldn't want to lead him on even though he knows what's going on.... I just want to be over with this. I tried to speak to her today but she decided to go back to her jerk ways. I'm going to just leave all the trying alone.... Why is this aqua so interested in this off and on and hot and cold and why am I so stuck on trying to fix it!! Smh I need to go into my shell!

No one else is to blame for this struggle, I have a problem with seeing the bigger picture and not focusing on the blatantly obvious smaller picture that hurts tremendously.
It hurts more knowing that I'm more forgiving. And it also hurts knowing that it is partially my fault.....

*hug*

Thanks for the hug!

One thing I like about you cancers, sassy, is that you really try to fix things with love. You guys try harder and are more determined in a relationship than anyone else I know. You guys also put up with a lot more crap in a relationship than anyone else I iknow. Several of my cancer friends are like this.

If your aqua can't see how much you love her, then, Pllbbbbt! (sticks out tongue at her).

I admire that you guys jump through more hoops than I'd ever be willing to do.

Please don't admire it.... The conscious effort of trying and trying can be placed on the wrong one!
I've made mistakes before and when it came to this Aqua, the things I was lacking in all of my other relationships, I found it with her. She was stable (career wise) she was structured with her morals which made me a better person and helped with my daughter and choices in life. She was very supportive financially and when I really needed it emotionally she was there as well. This time I wasn't clinging on to a total screw up. But I blame myself for trying so hard. Not sure why we do it. I think we do it even more when we know we messed up....

Another hug? 😛

I want to say don't put too much fault on yourself but you sound like you are. I wasn't going to say anything because nothing can possibly make it better, or at least I can't find the words for it. When I lost someone close to me I gave it my all to win her back, including waiting out 2 years for that second chance and to have it all wash away again.

With time you start to realise you gave it your all and you just weren't meant to be. The hurt will stay but it'll diminish then you wake up one wondering why you were ever so upset at someone you loved so much and that you got to spend this life experience with the other person.

Keep that faith however painful it can get. Sometimes it's all we have.

Posted by truecap
One thing I like about you cancers, sassy, is that you really try to fix things with love. You guys try harder and are more determined in a relationship than anyone else I know. You guys also put up with a lot more crap in a relationship than anyone else I iknow. Several of my cancer friends are like this.

If your aqua can't see how much you love her, then, Pllbbbbt! (sticks out tongue at her).

I admire that you guys jump through more hoops than I'd ever be willing to do.

+100000. You spoke my mind except I don't admire or like that aspect to cancers. It makes them look desperate and weak, which they are in love. They are fantastic lovers and deserve no less. Unfortunately, once they get attached to someone, and that someone turns out to be a user/abuser, they waste their time and efforts on that person. If a person treats you like shit or doesn't meet your standards in love, you shouldn't chase them. You should let them go and find someone else that treats you like gold. The thing with cancer is they become so co-dependent on their partner that letting them go ends their world. Hence they lay down for the person to walk all over them. That's not admirable. That's desperation. You and most cancers who get used like that remind me of all the cancers I know getting played like a flute in my life. I try not to think about it because I get angry! I don't certainly want to be your Don Quixote because nobody can save you from yourself or until you want to be saved.

Posted by mindofaquarius
I'd say she is giving you a lesson in not going behind her back - once you do so she'll leave and I think that's the right thing. well she came around so she might give you another chance. just wondering why you talked to your ex when SHE was the one who was there for you etc - I'd feel deeply betrayed

My ex only reached out for a friend. We haven't seen each other.


But I understand the betrayal part, but it was harmless.

Posted by aquarius09

Posted by truecap
One thing I like about you cancers, sassy, is that you really try to fix things with love. You guys try harder and are more determined in a relationship than anyone else I know. You guys also put up with a lot more crap in a relationship than anyone else I iknow. Several of my cancer friends are like this.

If your aqua can't see how much you love her, then, Pllbbbbt! (sticks out tongue at her).

I admire that you guys jump through more hoops than I'd ever be willing to do.

+100000. You spoke my mind except I don't admire or like that aspect to cancers. It makes them look desperate and weak, which they are in love. They are fantastic lovers and deserve no less. Unfortunately, once they get attached to someone, and that someone turns out to be a user/abuser, they waste their time and efforts on that person. If a person treats you like shit or doesn't meet your standards in love, you shouldn't chase them. You should let them go and find someone else that treats you like gold. The thing with cancer is they become so co-dependent on their partner that letting them go ends their world. Hence they lay down for the person to walk all over them. That's not admirable. That's desperation. You and most cancers who get used like that remind me of all the cancers I know getting played like a flute in my life. I try not to think about it because I get angry! I don't certainly want to be your Don Quixote because nobody can save you from yourself or until you want to be saved.

click to expand

Yes, You have made great points. We do get very passive with all the nonsense. But we reach a breaking point.

Unfortunately everyone has their way of handling things. And Cancers Love hard, and long...and at some point every sign has their way of holding on to something that isn't healthy for them.

Don't be upset about something you cannot understand.
Everyone deserves someone to have faith in them.
Just as much as it makes you angry, it isn't the easiest thing to deal with.

Posted by Caplove
I can understand her wanting some time and space away from you but it just seems like she's stringing you a long at this point.

You made a mistake, yes, but I think she needs to make up her mind already. If she really wants to make it work she needs to seriously LET IT GO or drop it all together and move on her merry way without you. Putting you through this ridiculous limbo is just kind of cruel and really unnecessary.

You said you're still talking/texting daily, is that correct? If it is, I'd pull away from all that and give her space to figure out what she really wants. You kind of have to draw the line on this otherwise she could drag it out forever trying to punish you.

I am pulling away. Its only Sunday, but as of Friday I haven't spoken to her after she denied an invite of mine. She seems to respond to the things I send. But won't initiate much. I am hurt because I believe this is punishment now. And out of spite. The ring that was purchased, she can have it. I am now working on putting all of my energy into not reaching out. I understand her need to be alone, and I will give her that. But she's being way to cruel. The punishment doesn't fit the crime, but I don't know how she feels, felt, or is thinking. Not my place to tell her how to feel, whether I believe its fair or not. But I decided not to continue to hurt myself, by reaching out. Before I have...but for this I think its way more painful when I know in my heart I wasn't being malicious.

Posted by Denver34
We dont care about your stupid boring life

Denver are you flirting?

why dont you bring that ole sexxy bod and experience a real cancer! LOL

Posted by Ssasy
SO!
As you read before, Ms. Aqua is Hurt and Upset about my speaking with My Ex. But she has come a around very slightly. What irritates me is that we ARE NOT together, but we text and almost speak everyday. When we did see eachother, she couldnt keep her hands off of me, and it was very intimate.
I gave her a promise ring when things were still distant, and she declined. When we met up recently, she said she wanted the ring. So I gave it to her.

She went out with some friends, and decided to show it off and mentioned her "EX" (as in me) gave it to her. So I called her out on how do you accept a "promise ring" from an ex, so she responds and said we are working towards the promises you offered with the ring, i dont want to rush back into anything. She is also up for a HUGE promotion, and with this she said she can only think of me and her mother, when the income increases. :/

SO! When shes ready she still wants a future? But shes trying So So Hard to stand her ground on being "TOUGH" But its turning me off and pushing me away.

At this point shes coming closer, but what do I do now? Stay busy? Stay away? WHAT?
An old fling from HS offererd me to join them on a trip to Atlanta, I want to go because Hey just for fun! But I still have a Foot in Aqua world :/....

I hope I'm not to late to give my opinion.
I admire the fact that you own up to your mistake and you still stick up for your aquarian when people try to put her down. That's loyalty!
* I can't speak for all aquarians but I can try to give you some insight.*
Yes, your aquarian is upset, you broke her trust and now she has to figure out how to move forward (with or without you). For me, honestly and loyalty are the keys to a successful relationship. Once the trust of a relationship is broken, it's hard to move forward, we have to weigh the pro's and con's of the relationship. It's a constant war between the head and heart and it can absolutely drive us mad. It sounds like she's unsure and is throwing herself in her work for now. That doesn't mean, she isn't constantly thinking about it, most likely she is. If she needs to disappear for awhile let her, she needs to get her head straight and make sure that it's worth it, your worth it. The promise ring was a nice touch, but sometimes it can lead to unsure questions. It sucks how much we over analyze everything and second g

and second guess your intentions.

I would suggest and again this is only my suggestion, if you want this to work. Be there for her, show your loyalty, your friendship, your trust and love. We notice everything, (I don't know if that's a good thing or a curse) and the last thing to give her is a reason to leave, when she's trying to give herself a reason to stay.

I really hope things work out for the both of you.

I've recently started a friendship with a cancer man and I like him. I'll be rooting for this aqua and cancer relationships to work.

Posted by Aquadeer
and second guess your intentions.

I would suggest and again this is only my suggestion, if you want this to work. Be there for her, show your loyalty, your friendship, your trust and love. We notice everything, (I don't know if that's a good thing or a curse) and the last thing to give her is a reason to leave, when she's trying to give herself a reason to stay.

I really hope things work out for the both of you.

I've recently started a friendship with a cancer man and I like him. I'll be rooting for this aqua and cancer relationships to work.

Thank you for your insight! I appreciate it...