camela
@camela
9 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 2 · Topics: 1
Cancer husband Aries Wife Problem. Need help?
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damn
Sis just leave him. Maybe you'll get closure one day but don't get more poor treatment waiting on closure. He's not treating you well at all. I would be heart broken.
Tbh it will pass. The more you push the longer it will take.
He probably got bored or felt smothered. Just be the best you and help him fall in love with you again. Don't flip or be jealous bc you'll push him away. Let him come & go as he pleases. We don't do well with pressure.
I did this to my X & if he would have left me alone things would have fallen apart with the guy I was trying to leave with & we would still be together. They did fall apart but him pushing made me more convinced the other guy was easier to deal with. I didn't see he was fighting for true love bc I felt he wanted to control me.
My X wouldn't give me any freedom so it got really ugly & I left state. Years later I contacted him & told him he should have left me alone & I would have got my head right & been more in love with him.
Not saying it's right or easy I'm being honest about what I've been through.
He probably got bored or felt smothered. Just be the best you and help him fall in love with you again. Don't flip or be jealous bc you'll push him away. Let him come & go as he pleases. We don't do well with pressure.
I did this to my X & if he would have left me alone things would have fallen apart with the guy I was trying to leave with & we would still be together. They did fall apart but him pushing made me more convinced the other guy was easier to deal with. I didn't see he was fighting for true love bc I felt he wanted to control me.
My X wouldn't give me any freedom so it got really ugly & I left state. Years later I contacted him & told him he should have left me alone & I would have got my head right & been more in love with him.
Not saying it's right or easy I'm being honest about what I've been through.
Posted by CalmCrab22Um, are you kidding me? What a ridiculous way to excuse this behavior. A lot of Cancers I've dealt with are self-centered and delusional, save for a few. My two exes are examples of said delusion.
Tbh it will pass. The more you push the longer it will take.
He probably got bored or felt smothered. Just be the best you and help him fall in love with you again. Don't flip or be jealous bc you'll push him away. Let him come & go as he pleases. We don't do well with pressure.
I did this to my X & if he would have left me alone things would have fallen apart with the guy I was trying to leave with & we would still be together. They did fall apart but him pushing made me more convinced the other guy was easier to deal with. I didn't see he was fighting for true love bc I felt he wanted to control me.
My X wouldn't give me any freedom so it got really ugly & I left state. Years later I contacted him & told him he should have left me alone & I would have got my head right & been more in love with him.
Not saying it's right or easy I'm being honest about what I've been through.
Cancers love to say how they don't want to be smothered, but they'll be damned if you don't allow them to clobber you. He is being utterly disrespectful of their relationship and she should not have to be the one to make adjustments, that's a crock of shit.
If anything is to be done, he needs to respect the marriage he made a vow to. Not torture the woman he chose to marry and make her bend so he can fulfill his egocentric 'needs'. If he's in love with this woman, he needs to free his wife and end it -- she deserves so much better.
Otherwise, he needs to let go of this fantasy and invest more into the bond he made with his wife.
If he has issues with something in their relationship, which is always the excuse for adulterers whether emotional or physical, he needs to speak up. So they can work it out together.
Be strong, OP. Don't allow him to walk all over you and make any demands, unless they have to do with a solution to fix your relationship or a divorce. This is not ok.
What I don't understand is why you weren't ditching this fool 10 years ago when you saw obvious red flags of a cheater mentality??
Grow a pair, doormat. Desperation makes you look weak and pathetic.
Grow a pair, doormat. Desperation makes you look weak and pathetic.
Her husband is going to whop your husband's ass back into reality. You can fastforward the ass whopping if you like.
Then, I'd spit in his black eye and divorce his ass.
Then, I'd spit in his black eye and divorce his ass.
My husband doesn't play that shit. Once we had a couple over for dinner and he thought the other guy was holding conversation and eye contact with me too long. As we said goodbye to them at the door, my husband told the other guy, "this is my MF puss" and closed the door.
My husband's a Cancer Moon.
My husband's a Cancer Moon.
Posted by xomelindabelleNo shortage of ppl wanting to love us cancers forever though including you since you've dated more than one so have a seat evil one. I knew you were an Aries before I looked at your profile.Posted by CalmCrab22Um, are you kidding me? What a ridiculous way to excuse this behavior. A lot of Cancers I've dealt with are self-centered and delusional, save for a few. My two exes are examples of said delusion.
Tbh it will pass. The more you push the longer it will take.
He probably got bored or felt smothered. Just be the best you and help him fall in love with you again. Don't flip or be jealous bc you'll push him away. Let him come & go as he pleases. We don't do well with pressure.
I did this to my X & if he would have left me alone things would have fallen apart with the guy I was trying to leave with & we would still be together. They did fall apart but him pushing made me more convinced the other guy was easier to deal with. I didn't see he was fighting for true love bc I felt he wanted to control me.
My X wouldn't give me any freedom so it got really ugly & I left state. Years later I contacted him & told him he should have left me alone & I would have got my head right & been more in love with him.
Not saying it's right or easy I'm being honest about what I've been through.
Cancers love to say how they don't want to be smothered, but they'll be damned if you don't allow them to clobber you. He is being utterly disrespectful of their relationship and she should not have to be the one to make adjustments, that's a crock of shit.
If anything is to be done, he needs to respect the marriage he made a vow to. Not torture the woman he chose to marry and make her bend so he can fulfill his egocentric 'needs'. If he's in love with this woman, he needs to free his wife and end it -- she deserves so much better.
Otherwise, he needs to let go of this fantasy and invest more into the bond he made with his wife.
If he has issues with something in their relationship, which is always the excuse for adulterers whether emotional or physical, he needs to speak up. So they can work it out together.
Be strong, OP. Don't allow him to walk all over you and make any demands, unless they have to do with a solution to fix your relationship or a divorce. This is not ok.click to expand
I tried to give her advice to keep her husband. That's what she wants.
You are trying to destroy it. Great job. Home wrecker assistant.
Have a great night peach
Evil one hah give me a break. If anyone is assisting in any home wrecking, it's you for expecting her to take that shit.
He should be willing to talk things through with his wife, not "come and go as he pleases". And have her his ass while she feels left in the dark and like he's messing with her emotions. They should work together, not hurt each other further.
Knew I was an Aries? Mmk, congrats on your clairvoyancy.
Peace, toots.
He should be willing to talk things through with his wife, not "come and go as he pleases". And have her his ass while she feels left in the dark and like he's messing with her emotions. They should work together, not hurt each other further.
Knew I was an Aries? Mmk, congrats on your clairvoyancy.
Peace, toots.
By the way, the Cancers I dated were an abuser and one that was later diagnosed a narcissist. So don't even attempt to make any assumptions about my relationships with them and "not loving them forever".
Check yourself, sweetie.
I don't assume all Cancers are this way, as I previously stated "A lot of Cancers that I'VE DEALT WITH."
Speaking from my own experience.
Check yourself, sweetie.
I don't assume all Cancers are this way, as I previously stated "A lot of Cancers that I'VE DEALT WITH."
Speaking from my own experience.
I've dated a few Cancers. I've seen the best and the worst of this sign. My first serious relationship was with a Cancer. It was an open relationship and I didn't think nothing about it. He took good care of me.... both Cancers. But, then there was crazy triple Cancers. I taught crazy triple Cancer about astrology in an attempt to help him cope.
But, the thing I hate about cheating is they don't want you doing it to them. It's a selfishness. Cancers can be so caught up in their feelings, they completely ignore the feelings of others... their feeling are the only ones they care about. Sometimes they feel justified because the think they own the market on feelings and intensity thereof.
I show them that they do own it, I'm just not buying.
But, the thing I hate about cheating is they don't want you doing it to them. It's a selfishness. Cancers can be so caught up in their feelings, they completely ignore the feelings of others... their feeling are the only ones they care about. Sometimes they feel justified because the think they own the market on feelings and intensity thereof.
I show them that they do own it, I'm just not buying.
Aries influences always try to storm out the door. Smh
Divorce is horrible & there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage.
Divorce is horrible & there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage.
Posted by AriesLoveIt's what we do. Then we fall back to the one we really love. It's very very very normal most know it as grass is greener syndromePosted by CalmCrab22Yeah divorce is horrible. Oh well so is cheating.
Aries influences always try to storm out the door. Smh
Divorce is horrible & there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage.
This idiot is not trying to work on marriage he's trying to belittle his wife.
click to expand
Posted by AriesLoveDef. been there done that. 8 cancers in my world myself included. You can't convince me otherwisePosted by CalmCrab22So she needs to give him space to realize that.Posted by AriesLoveIt's what we do. Then we fall back to the one we really love. It's very very very normal most know it as grass is greener syndromePosted by CalmCrab22Yeah divorce is horrible. Oh well so is cheating.
Aries influences always try to storm out the door. Smh
Divorce is horrible & there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage.
This idiot is not trying to work on marriage he's trying to belittle his wife.
click to expand
Posted by CalmCrab22You would accept and expect the same in return?Posted by AriesLoveIt's what we do. Then we fall back to the one we really love. It's very very very normal most know it as grass is greener syndromePosted by CalmCrab22Yeah divorce is horrible. Oh well so is cheating.
Aries influences always try to storm out the door. Smh
Divorce is horrible & there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage.
This idiot is not trying to work on marriage he's trying to belittle his wife.
click to expand
I've seen it a thousand times.. man cheats, then woman cheats. Man files for divorce due to infidelity... shocker... and rips her apart... ignores her feelings and his infidelity completely. Once again, sending the message my feelings are the only feelings that matter.
Posted by VenusAquariusLMAO I've never been left... Only chasedPosted by CalmCrab22You would accept and expect the same in return?Posted by AriesLoveIt's what we do. Then we fall back to the one we really love. It's very very very normal most know it as grass is greener syndromePosted by CalmCrab22Yeah divorce is horrible. Oh well so is cheating.
Aries influences always try to storm out the door. Smh
Divorce is horrible & there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage.
This idiot is not trying to work on marriage he's trying to belittle his wife.
I've seen it a thousand times.. man cheats, then woman cheats. Man files for divorce due to infidelity... shocker... and rips her apart... ignores her feelings and his infidelity completely. Once again, sending the message my feelings are the only feelings that matter.
click to expand
Posted by CalmCrab22Would you accept, expect to work on your marriage if your wife was acting like this Aries' Cancer husband?Posted by VenusAquariusLMAO I've never been left... Only chasedPosted by CalmCrab22You would accept and expect the same in return?Posted by AriesLoveIt's what we do. Then we fall back to the one we really love. It's very very very normal most know it as grass is greener syndromePosted by CalmCrab22Yeah divorce is horrible. Oh well so is cheating.
Aries influences always try to storm out the door. Smh
Divorce is horrible & there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage.
This idiot is not trying to work on marriage he's trying to belittle his wife.
I've seen it a thousand times.. man cheats, then woman cheats. Man files for divorce due to infidelity... shocker... and rips her apart... ignores her feelings and his infidelity completely. Once again, sending the message my feelings are the only feelings that matter.
click to expand
Posted by AriesLoveShe's not leaving. That's been established.Posted by CalmCrab22That's all good. But he's not the only person in the marriage.Posted by AriesLoveDef. been there done that. 8 cancers in my world myself included. You can't convince me otherwisePosted by CalmCrab22So she needs to give him space to realize that.Posted by AriesLoveIt's what we do. Then we fall back to the one we really love. It's very very very normal most know it as grass is greener syndromePosted by CalmCrab22Yeah divorce is horrible. Oh well so is cheating.
Aries influences always try to storm out the door. Smh
Divorce is horrible & there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage.
This idiot is not trying to work on marriage he's trying to belittle his wife.
click to expand
Are you helping?
She can make her life harder by running around nuts or chill out live her life & he'll come home (emotionally) much faster.
I'd stay. I have stayed. I was much happier than the people hat told me to leave. Vice versa they always put up with my BS & the same guys telling them to leave wanted to confess their love for me later.
People cheat. Get over it & live with the one you know & love. It's not that big of a deal in 40 years they're still married N happy then what does this glitch really matter?
Look at some famous couples that stayed together after cheating. I bet your sweet tushy you'd like to be sitting where those ladies are.
@venusaquarius ^
Absolutely! That's part of love because real love, agape love is UNCONDITIONAL. Y'all are putting a list of conditions on it
Absolutely! That's part of love because real love, agape love is UNCONDITIONAL. Y'all are putting a list of conditions on it
Posted by AriesLoveIdk why ppl like you get married if it isn't a life long binding contract. Again she isn't like you. She is honorable by staying & taking her vows seriously. She isn't leaving. You're not helping.Posted by CalmCrab22I've been married. Just because you are married does not mean you are trapped for life with a disrespectful spouse. I can be unhappy by my damn self. I don't need any help. I can also be happy by damn self I don't need anyone for that either.Posted by AriesLoveShe's not leaving. That's been established.Posted by CalmCrab22That's all good. But he's not the only person in the marriage.Posted by AriesLoveDef. been there done that. 8 cancers in my world myself included. You can't convince me otherwisePosted by CalmCrab22So she needs to give him space to realize that.Posted by AriesLoveIt's what we do. Then we fall back to the one we really love. It's very very very normal most know it as grass is greener syndromePosted by CalmCrab22Yeah divorce is horrible. Oh well so is cheating.
Aries influences always try to storm out the door. Smh
Divorce is horrible & there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage.
This idiot is not trying to work on marriage he's trying to belittle his wife.
Are you helping?
She can make her life harder by running around nuts or chill out live her life & he'll come home (emotionally) much faster.
I'd stay. I have stayed. I was much happier than the people hat told me to leave. Vice versa they always put up with my BS & the same guys telling them to leave wanted to confess their love for me later.
People cheat. Get over it & live with the one you know & love. It's not that big of a deal in 40 years they're still married N happy then what does this glitch really matter?
Look at some famous couples that stayed together after cheating. I bet your sweet tushy you'd like to be sitting where those ladies are.
I don't know anybody in their right mind who wants to suffer. Be with someone who respects you and can control their lustful feelings for the sake of the marriage if nothing else.
click to expand
Posted by CalmCrab22I'm not. She has ignored his behavior and cannot understand how he could fall in love with very little contact. You did a good job of answering her questions verbatim. But, there comes a point where there is emotional or psychological abuse.
@venusaquarius ^
Absolutely! That's part of love because real love, agape love is UNCONDITIONAL. Y'all are putting a list of conditions on it
She married him with the same behavior he's showing now... so, I don’t know what she expected.
As a couple, you express what is and what is not expected of each other; hopefully, before commitment and definitely marriage.
He certainly didn't hide who he is bt, it's ridiculous.
Although I know a couple who divorced their spouses to marry each other... happens all the time but, the drama.
Posted by Arielle83
The problem lies with Aries always needing to be number 1.
My Aries rising gets that.
Absolutely. The basic concept of marriage though.
Personally, being #1 comes with alot of responsibilty and I fall back only to be chosen (in different circumstances) because I fell back or didn't give a fuck. What to do?
Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by CalmCrab22I'm not. She has ignored his behavior and cannot understand how he could fall in love with very little contact. You did a good job of answering her questions verbatim. But, there comes a point where there is emotional or psychological abuse.
@venusaquarius ^
Absolutely! That's part of love because real love, agape love is UNCONDITIONAL. Y'all are putting a list of conditions on it
She married him with the same behavior he's showing now... so, I don’t know what she expected.
As a couple, you express what is and what is not expected of each other; hopefully, before commitment and definitely marriage.
He certainly didn't hide who he is bt, it's ridiculous.
Although I know a couple who divorced their spouses to marry each other... happens all the time but, the drama.click to expand
He's been honest for the most part. I don't see much evidence of mental abuse. Just bc she doesn't like something doesn't mean she is being abused.
I gave advice from the stand point of her wanting to remain married (her choice) but regain her man.
I've been & seen both sides of this coin involving male & female crabs including myself.
My husband, a Cancer Moon, believes that marriage is forever, no matter what. But, damn, it tough as fuck.... too tough for me so, I quit. If you believe it is forever, you do the work to make it so, or it comes a prison. So, he did and we got back together.
If you do things that make someone hurt, you stop the hurting. It's seems simple enough to me. But, for some strange reason people don't get that.
If you do things that make someone hurt, you stop the hurting. It's seems simple enough to me. But, for some strange reason people don't get that.
Posted by AriesLoveNope I'd be out making sex tapes with his cousin & bff. Then he can watch & realize 2 can play that game so he can keep playing & getting hurt or sit his ass down & THEN I'll come home & we can have lot of make up sex & get on knowing we're both capable of leaving but now knowing we love each other more than outsiders & we're better off behaving at home.
@Calmcrab22
I sure didn't get married to get cheated on.
I guess you're the type that sits around hoping wishing crying while your husband is out with his mistress. Telling your insecure ass he can't help how he feels.
Dirty sex, toys, random places, costumes & porn keep men pretty happy though
Posted by CalmCrab22No, it doesn't necessarily mean mental or emotional abuse yet. But, if it keeps happening. I'm sure you can imagine.Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by CalmCrab22I'm not. She has ignored his behavior and cannot understand how he could fall in love with very little contact. You did a good job of answering her questions verbatim. But, there comes a point where there is emotional or psychological abuse.
@venusaquarius ^
Absolutely! That's part of love because real love, agape love is UNCONDITIONAL. Y'all are putting a list of conditions on it
She married him with the same behavior he's showing now... so, I don’t know what she expected.
As a couple, you express what is and what is not expected of each other; hopefully, before commitment and definitely marriage.
He certainly didn't hide who he is bt, it's ridiculous.
Although I know a couple who divorced their spouses to marry each other... happens all the time but, the drama.
He's been honest for the most part. I don't see much evidence of mental abuse. Just bc she doesn't like something doesn't mean she is being abused.
I gave advice from the stand point of her wanting to remain married (her choice) but regain her man.
I've been & seen both sides of this coin involving male & female crabs including myself.
click to expand
Posted by Arielle83I second this!Posted by VenusAquariusI think cancer falls into admiration though, not "in love".Posted by Arielle83
The problem lies with Aries always needing to be number 1.
My Aries rising gets that.
Absolutely. The basic concept of marriage though.
Personally, being #1 comes with alot of responsibilty and I fall back only to be chosen (in different circumstances) because I fell back or didn't give a fuck. What to do?
He's not getting something he needs.
Maybe he's not getting validation.
It's only one side of the story.
click to expand
Posted by Arielle83True.Posted by VenusAquariusI think cancer falls into admiration though, not "in love".Posted by Arielle83
The problem lies with Aries always needing to be number 1.
My Aries rising gets that.
Absolutely. The basic concept of marriage though.
Personally, being #1 comes with alot of responsibilty and I fall back only to be chosen (in different circumstances) because I fell back or didn't give a fuck. What to do?
He's not getting something he needs.
Maybe he's not getting validation.
It's only one side of the story.
click to expand
However, before they were married, they both responded to each other in a similar fashion; him looking, her ignoring. So, the need possibly wasn't being met then, yet they still said I do. Stranger things have happened.
Posted by VenusAquariusThen they aren't working as a team. If he gets his head right & they work on things like reasonable adults (which is hard for Aries) they can avoid it happening more than likely.Posted by CalmCrab22No, it doesn't necessarily mean mental or emotional abuse yet. But, if it keeps happening. I'm sure you can imagine.Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by CalmCrab22I'm not. She has ignored his behavior and cannot understand how he could fall in love with very little contact. You did a good job of answering her questions verbatim. But, there comes a point where there is emotional or psychological abuse.
@venusaquarius ^
Absolutely! That's part of love because real love, agape love is UNCONDITIONAL. Y'all are putting a list of conditions on it
She married him with the same behavior he's showing now... so, I don’t know what she expected.
As a couple, you express what is and what is not expected of each other; hopefully, before commitment and definitely marriage.
He certainly didn't hide who he is bt, it's ridiculous.
Although I know a couple who divorced their spouses to marry each other... happens all the time but, the drama.
He's been honest for the most part. I don't see much evidence of mental abuse. Just bc she doesn't like something doesn't mean she is being abused.
I gave advice from the stand point of her wanting to remain married (her choice) but regain her man.
I've been & seen both sides of this coin involving male & female crabs including myself.
click to expand
If it continues then they're not working on it (like you said ) and possibly has other chart aspects in play or she's being to stubborn.
Posted by CalmCrab22Posted by VenusAquariusThen they aren't working as a team. If he gets his head right & they work on things like reasonable adults (which is hard for Aries) they can avoid it happening more than likely.Posted by CalmCrab22No, it doesn't necessarily mean mental or emotional abuse yet. But, if it keeps happening. I'm sure you can imagine.Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by CalmCrab22I'm not. She has ignored his behavior and cannot understand how he could fall in love with very little contact. You did a good job of answering her questions verbatim. But, there comes a point where there is emotional or psychological abuse.
@venusaquarius ^
Absolutely! That's part of love because real love, agape love is UNCONDITIONAL. Y'all are putting a list of conditions on it
She married him with the same behavior he's showing now... so, I don’t know what she expected.
As a couple, you express what is and what is not expected of each other; hopefully, before commitment and definitely marriage.
He certainly didn't hide who he is bt, it's ridiculous.
Although I know a couple who divorced their spouses to marry each other... happens all the time but, the drama.
He's been honest for the most part. I don't see much evidence of mental abuse. Just bc she doesn't like something doesn't mean she is being abused.
I gave advice from the stand point of her wanting to remain married (her choice) but regain her man.
I've been & seen both sides of this coin involving male & female crabs including myself.
If it continues then they're not working on it (like you said ) and possibly has other chart aspects in play or she's being to stubborn.click to expand
LOL at the "which is hard for Aries." You know both signs are stubborn... possibly why they SQUARE each other. Aries is more on the "willfull" side of stubborn; hence the horns.
Posted by AriesLoveGood for the goose is good for the ganderPosted by CalmCrab22Yeah that's the reason to get married. For the two of y'all to screw the entire town, family members, and friends to get revenge on each other.Posted by AriesLoveNope I'd be out making sex tapes with his cousin & bff. Then he can watch & realize 2 can play that game so he can keep playing & getting hurt or sit his ass down & THEN I'll come home & we can have lot of make up sex & get on knowing we're both capable of leaving but now knowing we love each other more than outsiders & we're better off behaving at home.
@Calmcrab22
I sure didn't get married to get cheated on.
I guess you're the type that sits around hoping wishing crying while your husband is out with his mistress. Telling your insecure ass he can't help how he feels.
Dirty sex, toys, random places, costumes & porn keep men pretty happy though
Sorry I would have to pass on the opportunity to turn into a hoe to save my marriage.
click to expand
Keep in mind I am cancer so tomorrow my answer may be more along the lines of saying 47 Hail Marys & making his favorite food for the next 6 months & without poison!
Anyway it goes most cancers do marry for life. Not our fault the spouse doesn't hold up their end (in some cases)
There's nothing wrong with leaving him for a few months & letting him sink his own ship then figure out he made a mistake leaving. But I do support not divorcing & not smothering
Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by CalmCrab22Posted by VenusAquariusThen they aren't working as a team. If he gets his head right & they work on things like reasonable adults (which is hard for Aries) they can avoid it happening more than likely.Posted by CalmCrab22No, it doesn't necessarily mean mental or emotional abuse yet. But, if it keeps happening. I'm sure you can imagine.Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by CalmCrab22I'm not. She has ignored his behavior and cannot understand how he could fall in love with very little contact. You did a good job of answering her questions verbatim. But, there comes a point where there is emotional or psychological abuse.
@venusaquarius ^
Absolutely! That's part of love because real love, agape love is UNCONDITIONAL. Y'all are putting a list of conditions on it
She married him with the same behavior he's showing now... so, I don’t know what she expected.
As a couple, you express what is and what is not expected of each other; hopefully, before commitment and definitely marriage.
He certainly didn't hide who he is bt, it's ridiculous.
Although I know a couple who divorced their spouses to marry each other... happens all the time but, the drama.
He's been honest for the most part. I don't see much evidence of mental abuse. Just bc she doesn't like something doesn't mean she is being abused.
I gave advice from the stand point of her wanting to remain married (her choice) but regain her man.
I've been & seen both sides of this coin involving male & female crabs including myself.
If it continues then they're not working on it (like you said ) and possibly has other chart aspects in play or she's being to stubborn.
LOL at the "which is hard for Aries." You know both signs are stubborn... possibly why they SQUARE each other. Aries is more on the "willfull" side of stubborn; hence the horns.
click to expand
I deal with my 26 year old daughter Aries daily & since birth I said she was going to be an attorney. Arguing is their air.
Cancer are stubborn bc we're pretty intuitive & look for knowledge so when we say something or do something we typically feel we have a pretty solid reason. Which isn't always true (can't believe I just admitted that)
OMG 16!!! 16! She's only 16
Posted by Arielle83Don't forget, he fooled himself too if. according to you, a need wasn't being met.Posted by VenusAquariusIf that's true then she fooled herself into believing someone would change just because of a paper.Posted by Arielle83True.Posted by VenusAquariusI think cancer falls into admiration though, not "in love".Posted by Arielle83
The problem lies with Aries always needing to be number 1.
My Aries rising gets that.
Absolutely. The basic concept of marriage though.
Personally, being #1 comes with alot of responsibilty and I fall back only to be chosen (in different circumstances) because I fell back or didn't give a fuck. What to do?
He's not getting something he needs.
Maybe he's not getting validation.
It's only one side of the story.
However, before they were married, they both responded to each other in a similar fashion; him looking, her ignoring. So, the need possibly wasn't being met then, yet they still said I do. Stranger things have happened.
Fuck after ten years, if hope I wouldn't get harped on for looking.
Men watch porn, so can women.
However, if a woman hates on her man for that too, that gives him more reason to hide it and lie for shame.
click to expand
Posted by Arielle83His "need," as you put it is what? "Sabatoging to fuck her off" wreaks of psychological or emotional abuse to me. That's the "prison" I speak of.Posted by VenusAquariusIt's probably the accusations.Posted by Arielle83Don't forget, he fooled himself too if. according to you, a need wasn't being met.Posted by VenusAquariusIf that's true then she fooled herself into believing someone would change just because of a paper.Posted by Arielle83True.Posted by VenusAquariusI think cancer falls into admiration though, not "in love".Posted by Arielle83
The problem lies with Aries always needing to be number 1.
My Aries rising gets that.
Absolutely. The basic concept of marriage though.
Personally, being #1 comes with alot of responsibilty and I fall back only to be chosen (in different circumstances) because I fell back or didn't give a fuck. What to do?
He's not getting something he needs.
Maybe he's not getting validation.
It's only one side of the story.
However, before they were married, they both responded to each other in a similar fashion; him looking, her ignoring. So, the need possibly wasn't being met then, yet they still said I do. Stranger things have happened.
Fuck after ten years, if hope I wouldn't get harped on for looking.
Men watch porn, so can women.
However, if a woman hates on her man for that too, that gives him more reason to hide it and lie for shame.
Getting mad over an eye gaze over and over drives ppl away.
Hence the need to lie and escape.
Aries women are possessive af.
He prob hid it in the beginning and felt shamed.
Now he doesn't give af cuz she'll keep doing it.
I've had an Aries friend drive her scorp husband mad over this. They always leave once pushed with accusations.
Or "since I'm accused constantly, I might as well sabotage to fuck her off."click to expand
Where there's smoke there's fire.
Aries and Scorp, another bad match. I fortunately was able to see through a Scorp who was pushing up on me for a relationship.
Once again, expectations of each other must be known and not violated.
For the most part, I agree with @CalmCrab22. I admire your desire to stay and try to fix what's broken, rather than just abandon ship. And it would really strengthen your marriage if you did your best to be the best you and "make him fall in love with you again" like CalmCrab22 said. However, this needs to come after he's been held accountable for his actions. In my opinion, it's okay that he looks at and admires beautiful women, it's natural. But it's a problem if he thinks he's falling in love with another woman, even if that may not actually be the case. He shouldn't be having those kinds of feelings for a woman other than yourself. Therefore, you two definitely need to sit down (maybe by yourselves, maybe with a counselor) and figure out what's missing in your marriage, and how that correlates to his shallow infatuation with this other woman. And if he sees this conversation as you smothering him, then he has a communication problem, because a couple needs to be able to discuss problems in their relationship efficiently.
Good luck OP 🙂
Good luck OP 🙂
Posted by xomelindabelleAgreed!Posted by CalmCrab22Um, are you kidding me? What a ridiculous way to excuse this behavior. A lot of Cancers I've dealt with are self-centered and delusional, save for a few. My two exes are examples of said delusion.
Tbh it will pass. The more you push the longer it will take.
He probably got bored or felt smothered. Just be the best you and help him fall in love with you again. Don't flip or be jealous bc you'll push him away. Let him come & go as he pleases. We don't do well with pressure.
I did this to my X & if he would have left me alone things would have fallen apart with the guy I was trying to leave with & we would still be together. They did fall apart but him pushing made me more convinced the other guy was easier to deal with. I didn't see he was fighting for true love bc I felt he wanted to control me.
My X wouldn't give me any freedom so it got really ugly & I left state. Years later I contacted him & told him he should have left me alone & I would have got my head right & been more in love with him.
Not saying it's right or easy I'm being honest about what I've been through.
Cancers love to say how they don't want to be smothered, but they'll be damned if you don't allow them to clobber you. He is being utterly disrespectful of their relationship and she should not have to be the one to make adjustments, that's a crock of shit.
If anything is to be done, he needs to respect the marriage he made a vow to. Not torture the woman he chose to marry and make her bend so he can fulfill his egocentric 'needs'. If he's in love with this woman, he needs to free his wife and end it -- she deserves so much better.
Otherwise, he needs to let go of this fantasy and invest more into the bond he made with his wife.
If he has issues with something in their relationship, which is always the excuse for adulterers whether emotional or physical, he needs to speak up. So they can work it out together.
Be strong, OP. Don't allow him to walk all over you and make any demands, unless they have to do with a solution to fix your relationship or a divorce. This is not ok.click to expand
Posted by starwars😭
virgos and cancers are seriously trash
Go the honest route, but don't know how you'll work through it. I'd always have her in the back of my mind. Annoying also that you happened to be with him when he met this woman. Or maybe its better you know who you're dealing with. I don't know which is worse. I just know that would make my blood boil and I'd be furious lol
Posted by ImpulsvI think she'd call up dr. Phil
What would Oprah do? In this instance
Posted by AriesLoveSo she's the selfish type. My X BFF was one of those. Her husband had 2 years left to become a doctor & he was being handed a practice from his late fathers estate. She divorced him for an older dude that sells used imports bc she got a Mercedes from him to get the divorce.Posted by CalmCrab22My Aunt is a Cancer married and divorced twice. Not true.Posted by AriesLoveGood for the goose is good for the ganderPosted by CalmCrab22Yeah that's the reason to get married. For the two of y'all to screw the entire town, family members, and friends to get revenge on each other.Posted by AriesLoveNope I'd be out making sex tapes with his cousin & bff. Then he can watch & realize 2 can play that game so he can keep playing & getting hurt or sit his ass down & THEN I'll come home & we can have lot of make up sex & get on knowing we're both capable of leaving but now knowing we love each other more than outsiders & we're better off behaving at home.
@Calmcrab22
I sure didn't get married to get cheated on.
I guess you're the type that sits around hoping wishing crying while your husband is out with his mistress. Telling your insecure ass he can't help how he feels.
Dirty sex, toys, random places, costumes & porn keep men pretty happy though
Sorry I would have to pass on the opportunity to turn into a hoe to save my marriage.
Keep in mind I am cancer so tomorrow my answer may be more along the lines of saying 47 Hail Marys & making his favorite food for the next 6 months & without poison!
Anyway it goes most cancers do marry for life. Not our fault the spouse doesn't hold up their end (in some cases)
click to expand
Karma is a B. She lost her son in the divorce. Then had a miscarriage and hasn't spoken to most of her family in 6 years. Sucks to hate yourself.
Posted by Arielle83YES!! My X accused me of wanting to be with EVERY One & so that became my rebuttal. If you accuse I might as well do. I'm in trouble anywayPosted by VenusAquariusIt's probably the accusations.Posted by Arielle83Don't forget, he fooled himself too if. according to you, a need wasn't being met.Posted by VenusAquariusIf that's true then she fooled herself into believing someone would change just because of a paper.Posted by Arielle83True.Posted by VenusAquariusI think cancer falls into admiration though, not "in love".Posted by Arielle83
The problem lies with Aries always needing to be number 1.
My Aries rising gets that.
Absolutely. The basic concept of marriage though.
Personally, being #1 comes with alot of responsibilty and I fall back only to be chosen (in different circumstances) because I fell back or didn't give a fuck. What to do?
He's not getting something he needs.
Maybe he's not getting validation.
It's only one side of the story.
However, before they were married, they both responded to each other in a similar fashion; him looking, her ignoring. So, the need possibly wasn't being met then, yet they still said I do. Stranger things have happened.
Fuck after ten years, if hope I wouldn't get harped on for looking.
Men watch porn, so can women.
However, if a woman hates on her man for that too, that gives him more reason to hide it and lie for shame.
Getting mad over an eye gaze over and over drives ppl away.
Hence the need to lie and escape.
Aries women are possessive af.
He prob hid it in the beginning and felt shamed.
Now he doesn't give af cuz she'll keep doing it.
I've had an Aries friend drive her scorp husband mad over this. They always leave once pushed with accusations.
Or "since I'm accused constantly, I might as well sabotage to fuck her off."click to expand
Posted by TerramineLightThose typing classes paid off bc you can sure type up a storm. KnucklesPosted by CalmCrab22
Ive yet to back down from a fight doesn't matter to me if you're a male.
Your fingers should be looking me up not typing a rebuttal
I aint comin just yet. Nobody said I had the means. There's a reason I said "if we meet". But I'm definitely going to remember this. Then again who knows if you'll still be there by time I do have the means. You're just lucky.
I definitely wouldn't hold back because you're a woman, and I wouldn't win because I'm a man. I'd win because in my experience I'm too good to lose. I've never lost a fight once and I have a tendency to finish things in a single hit.click to expand
This was a good study into the species Cancer.
Cancer has an affair and who's to blame? Their spouse. I said that believe the only feelings that matter are their own and these posts prove it.
So, anyone wanting a relationship with a Cancer needs to know this darkside. The OP is or is going to be emotuonallly abused if she stays.
Cancer has an affair and who's to blame? Their spouse. I said that believe the only feelings that matter are their own and these posts prove it.
So, anyone wanting a relationship with a Cancer needs to know this darkside. The OP is or is going to be emotuonallly abused if she stays.
Wow, sounds crazy, you must divorce him, he's really not a worthy crab, pisses me off to see people like this, unless there's something you're not telling us, he's a bad person and you should divorce him, why keep person like this in your life when he doesn't value you or love you, you know if love isn't given freely it isn't worth having, as hard as it is walk away, he sounds like he's not the man for you, and try to look from the other side, you'll lose the bad person in your life which is always a good thing, goodluck to you! Keep your head high, don't lose your selfrespect and your value jut because some ungreatful motherfucker treats you like this, you'll find a better one! Look more into hi's venus mars and moon sign tho, that might do the infl.
Posted by Arielle83Go back and read. Apparently the looking finally lead to an affair.Posted by VenusAquariusWhat a generalization.
This was a good study into the species Cancer.
Cancer has an affair and who's to blame? Their spouse. I said that believe the only feelings that matter are their own and these posts prove it.
So, anyone wanting a relationship with a Cancer needs to know this darkside. The OP is or is going to be emotuonallly abused if she stays.
A cancer looks and gets bitched at for looking.
No one is blaming the spouse.
There are two sides. If you believe op is a saint in this situation, then that's where you lie.
It takes two to create this dynamic.
She's hurt so she will paint him as all bad.
At least he was honest about where his heads at.
I don't know any cheaters who give a preamble.
The point is they both have shit to work out on.
click to expand
Now what?
The OP describes incessant looking... ain't nobody saying people don't or can't look.
Ok so your cancer is having an emotional affair probably because you two are lacking in the connection you once had. That's established.
But now your husband is crossing major boundaries and fine lines. It's one thing to look, and while dating I wouldn't hold it against him. I really don't think this part is a big deal. However, you two have been married and he's doing far more than looking.
You should be his priority no matter what. It should be you who he sees most beautiful, most worthy. And that is exactly what prevents this kind of behavior. The problem is he doesn't (or can't) see you this way at this moment. And you mention he's been this way in the first year of marriage only...I just would have avoided this hurt.
If it were me I'd be inconsolable. You asked for the honesty and got it. Don't condemn him for it now. That should be your closure. There's a lot on the line, But you need to decide now what you're willing to take from and for this man.
He obviously isn't willing to cherish you the way you cherish this marriage if he's ok with causing you this grief.
But if it's of any relief to you (it still wouldn't be for me) I don't really think he has any real feelings for this woman. I think it's infatuation. We all fantasize about what we don't know and if it would be better; esp if we're missing something from our own situation.
My advice would be to gather all you've got, and leave. You deserve better than this. You deserve to be number one absolutely. You've given him ten years...like tf? He is totally disrespectful, numb and thoughtless concerning you. But you say divorce isn't an option, and while I don't get that...I get that.
So plan B would be to take a BREAK. Do things for yourself. Go shopping, look pretty; for yourself! Go out, do the things you like to do and completely ignore him and his sickening folly. He will notice the new look, he will notice the changed steps in your strut, he may realize you are fine with or without him, see what he is lacking and see you as his strength and answer. I think cancer men can be weak sometimes. Maybe then he will remember...
But never ever ever ever make any changes to your character for him. You are first at this point, and he is second. And through you honestly being yourself and finding that validation again, he may come around.
I hope it works out. And I don't know where most others are coming from, but you should never be alright with playing second best to ANYONE to salvage ANYTHING. Vows are for life yes, but you have a responsibility to secure your own happiness. Life love and marriage should not feel like hell.
But now your husband is crossing major boundaries and fine lines. It's one thing to look, and while dating I wouldn't hold it against him. I really don't think this part is a big deal. However, you two have been married and he's doing far more than looking.
You should be his priority no matter what. It should be you who he sees most beautiful, most worthy. And that is exactly what prevents this kind of behavior. The problem is he doesn't (or can't) see you this way at this moment. And you mention he's been this way in the first year of marriage only...I just would have avoided this hurt.
If it were me I'd be inconsolable. You asked for the honesty and got it. Don't condemn him for it now. That should be your closure. There's a lot on the line, But you need to decide now what you're willing to take from and for this man.
He obviously isn't willing to cherish you the way you cherish this marriage if he's ok with causing you this grief.
But if it's of any relief to you (it still wouldn't be for me) I don't really think he has any real feelings for this woman. I think it's infatuation. We all fantasize about what we don't know and if it would be better; esp if we're missing something from our own situation.
My advice would be to gather all you've got, and leave. You deserve better than this. You deserve to be number one absolutely. You've given him ten years...like tf? He is totally disrespectful, numb and thoughtless concerning you. But you say divorce isn't an option, and while I don't get that...I get that.
So plan B would be to take a BREAK. Do things for yourself. Go shopping, look pretty; for yourself! Go out, do the things you like to do and completely ignore him and his sickening folly. He will notice the new look, he will notice the changed steps in your strut, he may realize you are fine with or without him, see what he is lacking and see you as his strength and answer. I think cancer men can be weak sometimes. Maybe then he will remember...
But never ever ever ever make any changes to your character for him. You are first at this point, and he is second. And through you honestly being yourself and finding that validation again, he may come around.
I hope it works out. And I don't know where most others are coming from, but you should never be alright with playing second best to ANYONE to salvage ANYTHING. Vows are for life yes, but you have a responsibility to secure your own happiness. Life love and marriage should not feel like hell.
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