Did I lose my chance with this Aries?

A few months ago I found out that a friend of a friend (an Aries guy) has had a huge crush on me for the past year and a half, secretly speaking about how much he was attracted to/into me to other friends who kept mum about it. Shortly after that, me and the Aries became closer (we exchanged numbers and hung out on a few occasions) and fast forward to a few weeks ago, where we got into our first disagreement. I'm a Cancer and extremely emotional at times (especially now that my feelings are growing for him as well) and he was taken back by my intense reaction after we argued. A few days passed and we were back to normal, planning things out, being flirtatious and enjoying each other's company and last week we had yet ANOTHER disagreement which resulted in him ignoring me and now we are not on speaking terms. I texted him yesterday to say hello and see how he was doing and he never responded, which hurt me so much. The worst part of it all is that there are upcoming engagements with our circle of friends where we will have to see each other often for the next few weeks and it's been rough dealing with the awkwardness of it all.

I want to know, based on experiences with Aries or from Aries women/men themselves - is my Aries guy ignoring me because he wants space or is he completely turned off from me, for good? I guess I just want to understand if I need to move on and accept that things haven't been working out/Aries is over me or if I should just take my space/give him his and be open to something happening once there has been more time to cool off.

Ummm, I guess it depends on what you guys were arguing about. It probably has changed how he views you. I would say many people tend to idealize the people they are involved with so when you show them a side to you that's distasteful, it may weaken their attraction to you. Maybe this drama is a turn off for him? I don't know, gotta see his chart. I've ignored to teach my guy a lesson before even though I was over it. Maybe that's what he's doing.

Honestly, as an Aries, it takes a lot for me to ice someone out, and it's pretty easy to get me to forgive you and talk to you again if you're persistent about it.

what's his venus/ mars?

Posted by Gooober
Ummm, I guess it depends on what you guys were arguing about. It probably has changed how he views you. I would say many people tend to idealize the people they are involved with so when you show them a side to you that's distasteful, it may weaken their attraction to you. Maybe this drama is a turn off for him? I don't know, gotta see his chart. I've ignored to teach my guy a lesson before even though I was over it. Maybe that's what he's doing.

I agree with this. It depends on the argument and how attached he was to begin with. There are many factors that could be going on so the more details the better. Even then we don't know him so it's not like our answers will be any indication of certainty of his behavior.

Posted by Confused_
what's his venus/ mars?

His Venus is in Aquarius and Mars is in Libra

Here are both of our planets just for reference:

Me - Sun: Cancer, Moon: Capricorn, Mercury: Leo, Venus: Cancer, Mars: Scorpio, Ascendent: Libra

Him- Sun: Aries, Moon: Gemini, Mercury: Pisces, Venus: Aquarius, Mars: Libra, Ascendent: Unkown

Posted by Gooober
Ummm, I guess it depends on what you guys were arguing about. It probably has changed how he views you. I would say many people tend to idealize the people they are involved with so when you show them a side to you that's distasteful, it may weaken their attraction to you. Maybe this drama is a turn off for him? I don't know, gotta see his chart. I've ignored to teach my guy a lesson before even though I was over it. Maybe that's what he's doing.

Well the last disagreement we had started out with him asking me for help with studying with one of his upcoming exams. I told him on the day that I promised to study with him that we would have to reschedule because something else came up for me that I needed to address right away. Mostly the hurtful part of our 'disagreements' is how we respond to it - after learning that we had to reschedule, he became detached and quiet, and when I started reaching out to him later that day to see how he was, he completely ignored my messages. I became frustrated with this and told him he was handling the situation immaturely and if he would just speak to me, I'm sure we could resolve any harsh feelings and come to a better understanding. This happened a few weeks before, where he just detached and started ignoring me and after telling him that I couldn't handle the push-pull (and still having him ignore me), two days later he approached me, being really sweet and flirtatious and telling me, "You didnt think you were going to get rid of me THAT quickly, did you?" but he never brought up why he had ignored me or even what he was upset about, just trying to assure me that he doesnt "take anything personal". However, now we are in the same predicament.

He is immature and avoiding what he did to hurt you. You said ALL of the right things. You made me proud reading that.

Hes much like a child. When he doesnt get the attention he wants, acts out and ignores. Then you scolded him about his behavior and that made him feel low and embarrassed.

Then like a child, he comes back hoping youd forget everything and get back to normal.

You asked for respect. Job well done.

When he comes back. State very clearly what behavior you will not accept and the consequences.

He will them either learn and evolve or keep acting like a child.

Posted by carbiccap612

Posted by Gooober
Ummm, I guess it depends on what you guys were arguing about. It probably has changed how he views you. I would say many people tend to idealize the people they are involved with so when you show them a side to you that's distasteful, it may weaken their attraction to you. Maybe this drama is a turn off for him? I don't know, gotta see his chart. I've ignored to teach my guy a lesson before even though I was over it. Maybe that's what he's doing.

Well the last disagreement we had started out with him asking me for help with studying with one of his upcoming exams. I told him on the day that I promised to study with him that we would have to reschedule because something else came up for me that I needed to address right away. Mostly the hurtful part of our 'disagreements' is how we respond to it - after learning that we had to reschedule, he became detached and quiet, and when I started reaching out to him later that day to see how he was, he completely ignored my messages. I became frustrated with this and told him he was handling the situation immaturely and if he would just speak to me, I'm sure we could resolve any harsh feelings and come to a better understanding. This happened a few weeks before, where he just detached and started ignoring me and after telling him that I couldn't handle the push-pull (and still having him ignore me), two days later he approached me, being really sweet and flirtatious and telling me, "You didnt think you were going to get rid of me THAT quickly, did you?" but he never brought up why he had ignored me or even what he was upset about, just trying to assure me that he doesnt "take anything personal". However, now we are in the same predicament.

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thanks for answering my other question but this is more helpful.... well, for me you didn't lose chance with him but guy is immature and is asking to be treated like a baby when mad - to reassure, say the obvious about your reasons again but attention and effort will count...

I am not the expert with Aries guys but some of them never grow up and require very patient approach, some also do this BS being angry/ detaching/nothing happened stuff on purpose just to check how much you care...

I wouldn't go back to the last argument unless he wants to.. he probably won't, but take a chance to give him this undivided attention that he so very much craves... hope this helps somehow ._.

Posted by carbiccap612

Posted by Gooober
Ummm, I guess it depends on what you guys were arguing about. It probably has changed how he views you. I would say many people tend to idealize the people they are involved with so when you show them a side to you that's distasteful, it may weaken their attraction to you. Maybe this drama is a turn off for him? I don't know, gotta see his chart. I've ignored to teach my guy a lesson before even though I was over it. Maybe that's what he's doing.

Well the last disagreement we had started out with him asking me for help with studying with one of his upcoming exams. I told him on the day that I promised to study with him that we would have to reschedule because something else came up for me that I needed to address right away. Mostly the hurtful part of our 'disagreements' is how we respond to it - after learning that we had to reschedule, he became detached and quiet, and when I started reaching out to him later that day to see how he was, he completely ignored my messages. I became frustrated with this and told him he was handling the situation immaturely and if he would just speak to me, I'm sure we could resolve any harsh feelings and come to a better understanding. This happened a few weeks before, where he just detached and started ignoring me and after telling him that I couldn't handle the push-pull (and still having him ignore me), two days later he approached me, being really sweet and flirtatious and telling me, "You didnt think you were going to get rid of me THAT quickly, did you?" but he never brought up why he had ignored me or even what he was upset about, just trying to assure me that he doesnt "take anything personal". However, now we are in the same predicament.

click to expand

Lol. I may be wrong but maybe when you canceled on him, he felt maybe undesirable or maybe didn't like that you chose something else over meeting with him. He may be the the type of Aries that likes to come first. Also, not surprised he popped back in your life like nothing happened. I do the same thing.

Posted by Gooober

Posted by carbiccap612

Posted by Gooober
Ummm, I guess it depends on what you guys were arguing about. It probably has changed how he views you. I would say many people tend to idealize the people they are involved with so when you show them a side to you that's distasteful, it may weaken their attraction to you. Maybe this drama is a turn off for him? I don't know, gotta see his chart. I've ignored to teach my guy a lesson before even though I was over it. Maybe that's what he's doing.

Well the last disagreement we had started out with him asking me for help with studying with one of his upcoming exams. I told him on the day that I promised to study with him that we would have to reschedule because something else came up for me that I needed to address right away. Mostly the hurtful part of our 'disagreements' is how we respond to it - after learning that we had to reschedule, he became detached and quiet, and when I started reaching out to him later that day to see how he was, he completely ignored my messages. I became frustrated with this and told him he was handling the situation immaturely and if he would just speak to me, I'm sure we could resolve any harsh feelings and come to a better understanding. This happened a few weeks before, where he just detached and started ignoring me and after telling him that I couldn't handle the push-pull (and still having him ignore me), two days later he approached me, being really sweet and flirtatious and telling me, "You didnt think you were going to get rid of me THAT quickly, did you?" but he never brought up why he had ignored me or even what he was upset about, just trying to assure me that he doesnt "take anything personal". However, now we are in the same predicament.

Lol. I may be wrong but maybe when you canceled on him, he felt maybe undesirable or maybe didn't like that you chose something else over meeting with him. He may be the the type of Aries that likes to come first. Also, not surprised he popped back in your life like nothing happened. I do the same thing.

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He does give the impression that he likes coming first and as a Cancer, I actually don't mind giving him that reassurance if we end up taking things further. I just can't however give him that undivided attention because of his tendency to start ignoring situations or even my feelings. The most confusing part is that I would think someone who really liked me enough to tell other people about it for a year and a half, would want to work more at making it work. Plus this is my first time 'dating' and Aries, so I'm observing and trying to understand.

Posted by DMV
He is immature and avoiding what he did to hurt you. You said ALL of the right things. You made me proud reading that.

Hes much like a child. When he doesnt get the attention he wants, acts out and ignores. Then you scolded him about his behavior and that made him feel low and embarrassed.

Then like a child, he comes back hoping youd forget everything and get back to normal.

You asked for respect. Job well done.

Thank you.... the funny thing is that when we first started speaking about relationships, he said that he's yearning for a more mature and stable relationship which is of course what I would like too, but when confronted with situations like these, I'm noticing that he may not be ready to take it there.

We do have alot of fun together and as I've been getting to know him, I do think that a successful relationship is possible but I have doubts as to whether we are going to conflict when it comes to communicating effectively, which is important to me.

Call me crazy, but I think you might be overacting a bit. Did he say he was mad? So he didnt answer your text, so what? I'm sure he isn't the first, and he definitely won't be the last person to do that. It's not a big deal. Don't act so upset over evey little thing. I bet he wasn't even mad. It sounds like he backed off because you came at him all emotional. I hate it when people take personal offense to every little thing. If you're going to ride with an Aries, you're going to have to stop overthinking things.