Burning Down the House!

No! it isn't what it sounds like...I wish it only was. I have a friend who stays with me from time to time. Last night he bought over some bourbon and we got a little high!!! I went to bed and gave him some pillows and a quilt for the couch! I woke up this mornin and the house stunk like smoke and something burning! My sister came over this mornin and said "why does the house smell like something is burning"...I went out on the deck and there was the quilt I loaned him burnt beyond belief. I got a chill that ran down my back. I had no idea he was on fire because I was passed out myself. I guess I will not be having that many drinks and leaving the house unattended.

This friend has done this before and promised to go outside to smoke. He is an older guy,(alcoholic), 51, and is kind of down on his luck right now. I try and help him out sometimes, but this really is upsetting. He told me half drunk this mornin to f*** off and not even an apologized. He started getting a little hostile and I asked him to leave...I am not going to call the police on him. I wouldn't do that, but he is still here...what now?

64, 12....
I tell you this as a friend...
Don't your gut feelings tell you that this ingrate you so kindly took in has no respect for you— I mean, come on, this bastard ruined your quilt, smoked in your home when you told him not to and told you to "fuck off"? There's a reason why he is down on his luck--he put himself there! And he has no one else to blame but himself. It sounds like he needs to do the 12 steps seriously. One of the steps requires that he is to write letters of apology to all the people he thinks he may have hurt in his past--I think he should apologize to you. You showed your kindness and open heart and he treated you with total disrespect. You need to let him go and get him out of your home. And, if all gets worse, then yes, you just may have to call the police. After all, he destroyed your property.

No, it's all worked out! Thanks though...I woke him up when he was half a sleep and still drunk. That was my fault. I let him sleep it off and when he did finally get up, he told me he was really sorry!! He is a Vietnam Vet and he has alot of problems. He has helped me out around the house numerous times. We are good friends. He has been through lots of programs and doesn't want to change his ways. I accept his choices even though it makes my heart sad. It is his life and his decision. He told me we were having a nice time and a good conversation and laughing and then I started crying and wouldn't stop! After I went to bed, he stayed up and drank the rest of the whiskey and then fell asleep with the cigarette. He can't walk very well and it is hard for him to get up and down. I don't care about the quilt, that is just a possession. I cared about him hurting us(me and the dogs) and himself in a house fire! I don't think it will happen again!

If I were you, I'd damn make sure that he does not fall asleep with a cigarette in hand. You can kiss your whole life goodbye.