DearCupcake
@DearCupcake
10 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 55 · Topics: 3
Calling all people dating /seeing a Cancer
In the beginning it drove me nuts. Now almost a year in, plus being long distance I'm used to it. Like someone posted a few days ago..."their moods change, but not their feelings". Knowing that I'm good now. Plus I kinda enjoy "the distance" at times. Then other time I just want what I want! 🙂
Adapting I guess.
Adapting I guess.
Yes I do, I'm actually in one of those moments since last night, he barely spoke to me since then. I know he likes being left alone. I'm trying not to get my head wraped around it that much.. I'm making myself occupied just to not think about it but reading stuff like IPoodMagic said also make me feel a bit better.
I know it's just how they are but these moments really suck sometimes.
I know it's just how they are but these moments really suck sometimes.
Like I said earlier, we only talked briefly in the morning and didn't hear from him since then. I don't even know if I should call and check up on him or just let him be and wait for him to call.
I sound childish, I know. 😢
I sound childish, I know. 😢
I never call him really, unless he starts to whine about it. I never know what kind of mood he's in, and I figure when he wants to hear from me he'll call, instead of me potentially "bothering" him. I hate calling people anyway period, but for him I find the strength and make the effort, lol. I send cute little texts to let him know I'm thinking about him tho a time or two during the week. So things are very sporadic, but they work for us.
But dont sweat it bloobaz, we still go a few days without talking. You just gotta get to the point where you're like it fuck it, I trust him, and we'll talk when he has a min. And if you wanna call, just do it. If you over think it, then you'll be a constant wreck.
But dont sweat it bloobaz, we still go a few days without talking. You just gotta get to the point where you're like it fuck it, I trust him, and we'll talk when he has a min. And if you wanna call, just do it. If you over think it, then you'll be a constant wreck.
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
*with not will
They make time for people who make time for them and don't play games.
Posted by MoonArtist
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
I'm the same I can't have people around me all the time I need space to zone out and do my own thing.
Posted by YellowSubmarinePosted by YourFavoriteDXPMemberPosted by Arielle83
I don't get how anyone feels neglected. Can't ppl be busy?
I feel the need to give you a shovel that can assist you with that load of bullshit.
I work at a hospital, am currently in a second Master's Degree program FULL TIME, answer phones at a crisis center and talk people out of killing themselves, serve in the Reserve forces of our military, conduct research for a suicide prevention therapy program, maintain an active social life with my friends, etc...
BUT THERE IS NEVER A MOMENT IN TIME WHERE I AM TOO "BUSY" TO MAINTAIN REGULAR DAILY CONTACT WITH MY CANCER GIRLFRIEND.
Yours is a cowardly response if I ever saw one.
Marry meclick to expand
I second that! This is the most mature comment I have seen in the history of cancer board. I want to marry him too! What are your placements? In fact if I can't have you, then similar placements will do. Lol
Exactly! Priorities reveal everything.
I use that busy line for people I'm just not that into. For a significant other, I always make time and juggle my alone time around that.
I use that busy line for people I'm just not that into. For a significant other, I always make time and juggle my alone time around that.
Lol at yellow submarine....I was impressed too when I saw all that!
That cancer girlfriend he got is lucky!
That cancer girlfriend he got is lucky!
I am a busy girl too but I will make time for people who matters in my life.
Posted by MoonArtist
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
^^^^^^this though = definitely ME! Hit twice with Virgo & Cancer traits ...rising & moon!
+1 🙂
Posted by LovelyisisPosted by MoonArtist
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
^^^^^^this though = definitely ME! Hit twice with Virgo & Cancer traits ...rising & moon!
+1 🙂click to expand
People see this as being distant or cold, when in reality, we're just trying to self-care for a bit. I love being around people, interacting with my loved ones, etc, and I also love my quiet time. I'm not sure why this is considered a negative thing by some.
Posted by MoonArtistPosted by LovelyisisPosted by MoonArtist
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
^^^^^^this though = definitely ME! Hit twice with Virgo & Cancer traits ...rising & moon!
+1 🙂
People see this as being distant or cold, when in reality, we're just trying to self-care for a bit. I love being around people, interacting with my loved ones, etc, and I also love my quiet time. I'm not sure why this is considered a negative thing by some.click to expand
Moon....I swear first day on Taurus board I said exactly same thing regarding "alone time" and allowing us to "recharge" so we can truly give the love/attention others need/require from us.....well....the Taurus response was "robot"....I died laughing...lol!!!
Posted by LovelyisisPosted by MoonArtistPosted by LovelyisisPosted by MoonArtist
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
^^^^^^this though = definitely ME! Hit twice with Virgo & Cancer traits ...rising & moon!
+1 🙂
People see this as being distant or cold, when in reality, we're just trying to self-care for a bit. I love being around people, interacting with my loved ones, etc, and I also love my quiet time. I'm not sure why this is considered a negative thing by some.
Moon....I swear first day on Taurus board I said exactly same thing regarding "alone time" and allowing us to "recharge" so we can truly give the love/attention others need/require from us.....well....the Taurus response was "robot"....I died laughing...lol!!!click to expand
They don't like it because it's something they can't control. lol
Posted by MoonArtistPosted by LovelyisisPosted by MoonArtistPosted by LovelyisisPosted by MoonArtist
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
^^^^^^this though = definitely ME! Hit twice with Virgo & Cancer traits ...rising & moon!
+1 🙂
People see this as being distant or cold, when in reality, we're just trying to self-care for a bit. I love being around people, interacting with my loved ones, etc, and I also love my quiet time. I'm not sure why this is considered a negative thing by some.
Moon....I swear first day on Taurus board I said exactly same thing regarding "alone time" and allowing us to "recharge" so we can truly give the love/attention others need/require from us.....well....the Taurus response was "robot"....I died laughing...lol!!!
They don't like it because it's something they can't control. lolclick to expand
+1+1+1+1+1+1+1+1+1+1+1+1+1 🙂!!!!!!!....LOL
Posted by MoonArtist
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
i cant help but to say this, its not always about being needy..
sometimes when we care and love someone from our heart we tend to get affected by their smallest of things or say behaviors.. some get curious some get worried are they fine, could be anything. but its just because we care and love them, its not like we want their attention or constantly want to bother them. yes everyone likes their personal space and time and we respect that but that doesnt mean one just comes close like a magnet and just in a moment want some space.. that gets confusing.
Posted by YourFavoriteDXPMember
I love the fact that a Cancer NOT COMMUNICATING for days and weeks on end is perfectly acceptable behavior to some of the Cancers around here.
You people need to remember that it's really a control thing for the Cancer. That's right, A CONTROL FREAK. Rejecting honest and open communication, and getting back to the person whenever you feel like it is not only awful behavior, but it's a form of power and control.
If a person calls a Cancer on a Monday, and doesn't hear from them until 2 weeks later, it is NOT the person who made the original call that is wrong.
So stop pissing at me for not having anything to do with the accursed Camp 2 Cancer crowd. There are very distinct reasons why they are not Camp 1 Cancers.
Just saying so in a way you are telling us that if we are in relationship with them then its going to be a distant one no matter how close you are? so when i heard or probably most have, that a relationship is based on how well you communicate with your partner.. then without or with that much of lack of communication, it is going to be good for them and their relationship?
Posted by harrynPosted by MoonArtist
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
i cant help but to say this, its not always about being needy..
sometimes when we care and love someone from our heart we tend to get affected by their smallest of things or say behaviors.. some get curious some get worried are they fine, could be anything. but its just because we care and love them, its not like we want their attention or constantly want to bother them. yes everyone likes their personal space and time and we respect that but that doesnt mean one just comes close like a magnet and just in a moment want some space.. that gets confusing.click to expand
What is confusing about needing space? If that's confusing, and you want the cling like a magnet all the time, that does sound needy.
Posted by YourFavoriteDXPMember
I love the fact that a Cancer NOT COMMUNICATING for days and weeks on end is perfectly acceptable behavior to some of the Cancers around here.
You people need to remember that it's really a control thing for the Cancer. That's right, A CONTROL FREAK. Rejecting honest and open communication, and getting back to the person whenever you feel like it is not only awful behavior, but it's a form of power and control.
If a person calls a Cancer on a Monday, and doesn't hear from them until 2 weeks later, it is NOT the person who made the original call that is wrong.
So stop pissing at me for not having anything to do with the accursed Camp 2 Cancer crowd. There are very distinct reasons why they are not Camp 1 Cancers.
Yes and no. It depends on what is going on. I have had people pester me with uncomfortable demands (relationship hopefuls, or just pushing to get laid) who wouldn't take a simple no for an answer. They would push and push, and pester, until finally I just stop responding to them and they get iced out. Could they come on the boards and complain about how some chick didn't respond to their 3 dozen texts or phone calls? Of course! But what's the story on the other side?
Posted by MoonArtistPosted by harrynPosted by MoonArtist
I'm will Arielle. If people are that needy, then they need to learn how to be alone with themselves and not be dependent on others so much. I swear, sometimes it seems Cancers attract the clingers because we're nurturers! I LIKE my alone time, I NEED some alone time! Being around people constantly can be exhausting. I have a hard time keeping their emotional energy from bombarding me. Sometimes I want to read, work on art, or dive into some knowledge chase tangent that caught my attention, and it's distracting and annoying to have to split my attention when I'm wanting that alone space. Let us recharge and we'll be able to come back all lovey dovey and sociable.
i cant help but to say this, its not always about being needy..
sometimes when we care and love someone from our heart we tend to get affected by their smallest of things or say behaviors.. some get curious some get worried are they fine, could be anything. but its just because we care and love them, its not like we want their attention or constantly want to bother them. yes everyone likes their personal space and time and we respect that but that doesnt mean one just comes close like a magnet and just in a moment want some space.. that gets confusing.
What is confusing about needing space? If that's confusing, and you want the cling like a magnet all the time, that does sound needy.click to expand
im not asking them to be needy neither i want to be, i just gave that as an example on how fast things happen with a cancerain which i observed, they want our company and everything but then all of a sudden need space out of nowhere like snap
Posted by Arielle83
Dating or seeing someone is just that and depends on how you define the parameters in your relationship.
Ive never known a cancer to outright ignore someone. I thought you people were just ranting on not getting a call back asap or a text answered promptly.
If someones ignoring you for weeks or months....
Well they clearly are over you and probably onto someone else. That isn't sign specific though.
yea it was meant to be ranting out, but i just needed some answers so i replied back n ol
i apologize to everyone for doing and starting this
What's wrong with being aloof I'm guilty of it people ask me if I moved away I say no. I can disappear on people for months just the way I'm.
Posted by Reincarnation
I tend to agree though. Some - not all - Crabs can be rather aloof.
Not a fan of this lack of passion.
Says a Scorpio....~snortchucklesnortgiggle~ Please, Scorpios run around with the perfect poker mask of "don't fuck with me", and then in private (inside) they're raging infernos of passion. Cancers are pretty much the same, except our "don't fuck with me" masks look more icy/snobby, and we aren't as good at keeping the mask in place.
ok, fine, I admit I don't have a poker face mask, and any thought or feeling I have is all over my face. Happy? 😛
AND STOP STARING AT ME WITH THAT "UH HUH" LOOK ON YOUR DEADPAN, EXPRESSIONLESS FACE!! ~glare suspicious eyes~ I know what you're thinking. And stop staring at my boobs. And no I don't want to make you a sandwich right now! Fine, what kind?
Posted by KoniuchaPosted by Stihl46
What's wrong with being aloof I'm guilty of it people ask me if I moved away I say no. I can disappear on people for months just the way I'm.
These people you disappear on for months, are they your friends?click to expand
They are people that know me they are not my close friends the circle of people that know me is wide. I stay in contact with the people that are in my closer circle of friends. I can go months without talking to people I know usually when I do talk to them its when I run into them at a store or restaurant.
Posted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtist
AND STOP STARING AT ME WITH THAT "UH HUH" LOOK ON YOUR DEADPAN, EXPRESSIONLESS FACE!! ~glare suspicious eyes~ I know what you're thinking. And stop staring at my boobs. And no I don't want to make you a sandwich right now! Fine, what kind?
Lol.
Nonetheless, I said some - not all - Crabs.
You all are very good in my book though. A lot of you are wife material.click to expand
OMG!! A miracle! I got you to laugh 😄
I don't have a poker face not like a Scorpio if I'm angry it shows on my face or something is on my mind I can come across snobbish its not I'm being a snob my mind is somewhere else.
Scorpio's wear a mask they don't take it off for anybody that isn't close to them and once they are comfortable taking the mask off around you it will never go back to what it was before. You better be prepared for what you are going to see because there is no turning back.
Scorpio's wear a mask they don't take it off for anybody that isn't close to them and once they are comfortable taking the mask off around you it will never go back to what it was before. You better be prepared for what you are going to see because there is no turning back.
Right now I had a little fight with my cancer man. I hate that he mistakes my "longness" for needyness. He told me that he felt like I was needy today (even though I was not) and that sometimes, working from morning to dawn, he only has a few minutes to lay back and relax and the thought of me being "needy" and "needing" to spend some time with him just makes him more distant and angry.
Even thought I do sometimes feel ignored, I KNOW he has a lot to deal with at work and whatnot. I really understand and I'm being patient and being there for him. I know the sun will shine for us again soon..
Sometimes I DO miss him and that kind of puts me into a blue mood, like, miss his presence but I'm NOT pissed at him or even angry or whatever and I hate that he doesn't understand this. There are two totally different emotions.
I don't know. He yesterday said that he loves me so much and this is the only thing that gives me strenght and makes me to not put it at heart because I know how he really feels. I know I've become his punching bag with all of this stress from work. I guess I love him that much.
I don't know what kind of advice I'm looking for right now but I really needed to vent. I'm sorry.
Even thought I do sometimes feel ignored, I KNOW he has a lot to deal with at work and whatnot. I really understand and I'm being patient and being there for him. I know the sun will shine for us again soon..
Sometimes I DO miss him and that kind of puts me into a blue mood, like, miss his presence but I'm NOT pissed at him or even angry or whatever and I hate that he doesn't understand this. There are two totally different emotions.
I don't know. He yesterday said that he loves me so much and this is the only thing that gives me strenght and makes me to not put it at heart because I know how he really feels. I know I've become his punching bag with all of this stress from work. I guess I love him that much.
I don't know what kind of advice I'm looking for right now but I really needed to vent. I'm sorry.
Posted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtistPosted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtist
AND STOP STARING AT ME WITH THAT "UH HUH" LOOK ON YOUR DEADPAN, EXPRESSIONLESS FACE!! ~glare suspicious eyes~ I know what you're thinking. And stop staring at my boobs. And no I don't want to make you a sandwich right now! Fine, what kind?
Lol.
Nonetheless, I said some - not all - Crabs.
You all are very good in my book though. A lot of you are wife material.
OMG!! A miracle! I got you to laugh 😄
I was surprised, too. I don't laugh often.
I'm also impressed at how well you know the Scorpion's mind.click to expand
You should. Laughter is good for the soul.
I have a very dear friend who is a Scorpio. Plus, water sign thinking. ~shrugs~ You guys are easy to understand.
Plus they're soooo snuggly!!.....even though they won't admit it. ~whispers~ Shhhhh....I won't tell.
Posted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtist
Plus they're soooo snuggly!!.....even though they won't admit it. ~whispers~ Shhhhh....I won't tell.
What?click to expand
What what?? Huh? I didn't say a thing! Nothing! Shhhhhh.....oh look, cookies.
Posted by MoonArtistPosted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtist
Plus they're soooo snuggly!!.....even though they won't admit it. ~whispers~ Shhhhh....I won't tell.
What?
What what?? Huh? I didn't say a thing! Nothing! Shhhhhh.....oh look, cookies.click to expand
You keep getting yourself all excited your head lights will be on high beam dreaming about Scorpio men having their way with you lol.
Posted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtistPosted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtist
Plus they're soooo snuggly!!.....even though they won't admit it. ~whispers~ Shhhhh....I won't tell.
What?
What what?? Huh? I didn't say a thing! Nothing! Shhhhhh.....oh look, cookies.
It's true.
I'll be a man and admit it.click to expand
It's ok. The grumpy poker face keeps most from figuring it out. 🙂
Posted by Stihl46Posted by MoonArtistPosted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtist
Plus they're soooo snuggly!!.....even though they won't admit it. ~whispers~ Shhhhh....I won't tell.
What?
What what?? Huh? I didn't say a thing! Nothing! Shhhhhh.....oh look, cookies.
You keep getting yourself all excited your head lights will be on high beam dreaming about Scorpio men having their way with you lol.click to expand
😛
Posted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtistPosted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtistPosted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtist
Plus they're soooo snuggly!!.....even though they won't admit it. ~whispers~ Shhhhh....I won't tell.
What?
What what?? Huh? I didn't say a thing! Nothing! Shhhhhh.....oh look, cookies.
It's true.
I'll be a man and admit it.
It's ok. The grumpy poker face keeps most from figuring it out. 🙂
I've noticed that some of you Cancers tend to like this "grumpy poker face" for some reason.
I called my Crabette friend out and said you must like this guy. She did not disagree.click to expand
Yes, it's bloody ADORABLE! I think what's so endearing about it is the fact that most find it intimidating, but if you understand the reason for it, and what's hidden underneath, it's impossible to take it personally. Then add the fact that it's a fun challenge to get the hidden parts to shine more, and it's like a treasure hunt that can't be resisted. MUST. GET. TREASURE. Then, when we get the treasure it's "MINE. My precious."
Posted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtistPosted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtistPosted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtistPosted by ReincarnationPosted by MoonArtist
Plus they're soooo snuggly!!.....even though they won't admit it. ~whispers~ Shhhhh....I won't tell.
What?
What what?? Huh? I didn't say a thing! Nothing! Shhhhhh.....oh look, cookies.
It's true.
I'll be a man and admit it.
It's ok. The grumpy poker face keeps most from figuring it out. 🙂
I've noticed that some of you Cancers tend to like this "grumpy poker face" for some reason.
I called my Crabette friend out and said you must like this guy. She did not disagree.
Yes, it's bloody ADORABLE! I think what's so endearing about it is the fact that most find it intimidating, but if you understand the reason for it, and what's hidden underneath, it's impossible to take it personally. Then add the fact that it's a fun challenge to get the hidden parts to shine more, and it's like a treasure hunt that can't be resisted. MUST. GET. TREASURE. Then, when we get the treasure it's "MINE. My precious."
I see.
My intuition was correct then.click to expand
Yes, it was.
Grumpy poker face = bi8tch resting face
I've never seen a scorpio man look bitchy. I don't think it's possible. On a scorp woman, though, yes, it's resting bitch face.
I have stalking privileges.
Posted by YourFavoriteDXPMember
Also, OP, remember that you should be in a relationship with a human being who is willing to jump fences to be with you.
Never, ever commit yourself to someone who is "on the fence" about a relationship.
You are wasting your time this way.
Hello 🙂 I was actually the OP. I was kind of locked out of my other account, idk! lol. But anyway, thank you sooo much for the kind words. I did eventually end it because it was way too much for me. I really did my very best and sometimes, that's not enough. I deserve the very best because I GIVE the very best to anyone who is important to me. He is indeed very very selfish. I can't think about it too much because it hurts me to think what I let him get away with.
He was very very committed in the beginning but then he just changed all of a sudden. Your words meant so much thank you know because you are exactly right.
Posted by SugarfootPosted by DearCupcake
Dont you ever feel neglected? Like the "distant" moments are way too much?
Blame it on my lack of sleep but I don't understand this hot and cold. It's abusive, man. Abusive.
Yea when I was with my ex, I frequently felt like this. I'm not at all clingy or dependent either, lol. When we broke up, I told him that I'm tired of being in a relationship yet feeling like I'm single. He just had too much going on with his life. He didn't have time for a relationship but he just wanted one and didn't want to let go, even though I gave him so many outs.click to expand
Yes, I felt the same way! I told him that sometimes I felt single. When he has problems or he was just upset, he would just detach and it was hurtful. He has a very volatile temper. I mean, I had to stay very calm and he would make himself angrier and angrier even if I remained quite and soft spoken during heated moments. It was straight up toxic in every manner.
Posted by bloobaz
Right now I had a little fight with my cancer man. I hate that he mistakes my "longness" for needyness. He told me that he felt like I was needy today (even though I was not) and that sometimes, working from morning to dawn, he only has a few minutes to lay back and relax and the thought of me being "needy" and "needing" to spend some time with him just makes him more distant and angry.
Even thought I do sometimes feel ignored, I KNOW he has a lot to deal with at work and whatnot. I really understand and I'm being patient and being there for him. I know the sun will shine for us again soon..
Sometimes I DO miss him and that kind of puts me into a blue mood, like, miss his presence but I'm NOT pissed at him or even angry or whatever and I hate that he doesn't understand this. There are two totally different emotions.
I don't know. He yesterday said that he loves me so much and this is the only thing that gives me strenght and makes me to not put it at heart because I know how he really feels. I know I've become his punching bag with all of this stress from work. I guess I love him that much.
I don't know what kind of advice I'm looking for right now but I really needed to vent. I'm sorry.
I felt that way too, but you have to understand that you can't be in a relationship that puts such an emotional strain on you. I really hope you understand that you deserve the very best and there is a wonderful man out there for you that won't make you feel that way at all! I mean that. I know my friends have wonderful relationships and marriages and it's because the other one understands that it's not "neediness" it's the desire to share your life with that someone and best of all, SELFLESSNESS...not selfishness. Don't settle for someone who is ignoring you.
I hope that if it doesn't change you find the strength to leave. You're much better than that, girl. I promise you! 😉 You'll be so much happier. You don't a man to obtain that! It's wonderful being content with yourself. We only get the love we think we deserve.
Posted by LadyCalamity
I felt that way too, but you have to understand that you can't be in a relationship that puts such an emotional strain on you. I really hope you understand that you deserve the very best and there is a wonderful man out there for you that won't make you feel that way at all! I mean that. I know my friends have wonderful relationships and marriages and it's because the other one understands that it's not "neediness" it's the desire to share your life with that someone and best of all, SELFLESSNESS...not selfishness. Don't settle for someone who is ignoring you.
I hope that if it doesn't change you find the strength to leave. You're much better than that, girl. I promise you! 😉 You'll be so much happier. You don't a man to obtain that! It's wonderful being content with yourself. We only get the love we think we deserve.
I really don't know what to say. I don't fret too much because I don't even know what I want more from this relationship. There's quite an age difference between us (13 years) and his life is pretty much busy because he's on his own (he's originally from another city) and at 34 years old some of our perspectives are different. He does make time for me as in he comes to pick me up from work everyday,he calls me throughout the day to check up on me, he tells me everyday that he loves me and other compliments and whatnot and I know and FEEL it's true. And in exchange of that, he asks of me (without him actually saying it) to just let him be and do his thing and not get into his own little space (he said that he loves the fact that I let him alone when he's moody/grumpy)
I guess it's just the leo in me asking for more attention...
Posted by bloobazPosted by LadyCalamity
I felt that way too, but you have to understand that you can't be in a relationship that puts such an emotional strain on you. I really hope you understand that you deserve the very best and there is a wonderful man out there for you that won't make you feel that way at all! I mean that. I know my friends have wonderful relationships and marriages and it's because the other one understands that it's not "neediness" it's the desire to share your life with that someone and best of all, SELFLESSNESS...not selfishness. Don't settle for someone who is ignoring you.
I hope that if it doesn't change you find the strength to leave. You're much better than that, girl. I promise you! 😉 You'll be so much happier. You don't a man to obtain that! It's wonderful being content with yourself. We only get the love we think we deserve.
I really don't know what to say. I don't fret too much because I don't even know what I want more from this relationship. There's quite an age difference between us (13 years) and his life is pretty much busy because he's on his own (he's originally from another city) and at 34 years old some of our perspectives are different. He does make time for me as in he comes to pick me up from work everyday,he calls me throughout the day to check up on me, he tells me everyday that he loves me and other compliments and whatnot and I know and FEEL it's true. And in exchange of that, he asks of me (without him actually saying it) to just let him be and do his thing and not get into his own little space (he said that he loves the fact that I let him alone when he's moody/grumpy)
I guess it's just the leo in me asking for more attention...click to expand
Haha, my sister is a Leo...I know those Leos, lol.
My last guy was like that too. All of that. Called me everyday etc. That leaving him alone when he is grumpy and moody turned into something else later on. And if this happens in your relationship, I guarantee you'll take the initiative to get out. After all, Leos don't stick around with someone constantly ignore them, their needs, or they feel stepped on.
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