Cancer Man Just Wants Sex

I know everyone is just gonna feel like scolding me. I'm probably gonna get ignored since you have "told me so" & how clichéd this is...

What I see is his classic Scorpio Mars in action. Wanting control over me, making me promise & listen wholly to him.

He stated he just wants sex. He doesn't want any emotional attachment or feelings. When I told him that he might fall in love with me after sleeping with me, he took it in stride, saying it might or it might never happen. Erm, Aquarius Moon?

We continued back & forth where I told him if I took this step further (sleeping) with him, he'd destroy me because I do like him a lot. To which he took my answer as a "No" & started saying I shouldn't worry as he wouldn't bother me anymore. To which I said I'm not worried... Then he sort of brought the conversation back to whether I would say yes or no to having sex with him. We bantered further & I said yes. Suddenly he said he doesn't understand me, why I'm doing this to myself, that I could have anyone I wanted... (& I'm wondering if he hasn't heard me telling him I like him a lot all this while). Our banters continued...

All in all, I do feel this like an elaborate test he's doing on me. He even said we'll do a 3some, to which I quickly & firmly told him no, then he just sort of said "OK just me then. You're mine then."

I almost believe everything he said, even that he doesn't like me & will never like me. But why is he doing all this just to have sex with me?

You must be Hot!

I don't think I'm hot in the visual sense, but guys' reactions usually do indicate they are quite attracted to me... But woe be me, I don't get much passionate & aggressive pursuers either. It seems like they wait for me to make a move, it's frustrating! So I chose this 1 Cancer man & now he's like "no emotional attachment & feelings". T_T fml really

@taupixie
Cancer people like to play the emotional mind game.
If you don't give I don't like you anymore things like this.
You just ground him. Or the whole (you & your body) or nothing.
If you allow what he wants you will end hurt.

Aside from the "you must be hot". Every woman has her natural "hot" appeal.

@thinktoomuch I expected more than that from you... You must be disappointed beyond words.

@nando2002 I've tried turning the choice around in my favour, but he wouldn't be intimidated. He would seemingly dropped interest & I'd lost him, or he would insist on no emotional attachment & made me choose to go ahead with it or otherwise.

Yes, every woman has her 'hot' appeal. You were just pulling my leg, but thank you xD

@Goldigold why can't the man make the move then?

@PrincessLouise yes, I'm going to have the sex. I mean, after 2 years of trying to get him, this is probably as good as it can get.

@Arielle well, if my vagina is going to do the hard work, it's only right he show appreciation to her

@thinktoomuch I'm tired of trying to figure out things. I'll go with his flow. I'm just being playful but thank you always for your advice 🙂

It took me a while to think of this...

So I know he's not really that into me. Everything says it. He wouldn't want to be attached to me. He wouldn't keep in touch with me. He wouldn't care about my feelings.

But he chose to sleep with only me? Me who's a few thousand miles away from him who will only meet a few times in a few months. Why not find someone else more convenient? Why choose me exclusively?

Laziness?

You're over analyzing this. He's said it pretty straight: he only wants sex and he's not interested in having an emotional connection or a relationship with you. You've said you have feelings for him and that having sex with him would hurt you emotionally, and you're still considering giving him what he wants— If this is one of those half baked ideas that "he'll fall in love with me after he dips his dick in me" then you're just going to be back on here wondering "why are cancer men so cold?!" or some other stupid whiney post complaining about how hurt you got when that plan didn't work.

Oh man @Op I hate those statements and we still hope for the best of change. But sometimes we make stupid ass mistakes with settling for less as you mentioned something similar to princesslouise. How much time that we have wasted I get myself hard. Good luck.

Posted by taupixie
It took me a while to think of this...

So I know he's not really that into me. Everything says it. He wouldn't want to be attached to me. He wouldn't keep in touch with me. He wouldn't care about my feelings.

But he chose to sleep with only me? Me who's a few thousand miles away from him who will only meet a few times in a few months. Why not find someone else more convenient? Why choose me exclusively?

Laziness?

Thanks for all the concern & humour/sarcasm 😄
Anybody care about my question as quoted? Would love to hear about this behaviour.

Posted by taupixie
It took me a while to think of this...

But he chose to sleep with only me? Me who's a few thousand miles away from him who will only meet a few times in a few months. Why not find someone else more convenient? Why choose me exclusively?

Laziness?

Don't kid yourself.

Posted by taupixie
It took me a while to think of this...

But he chose to sleep with only me? Me who's a few thousand miles away from him who will only meet a few times in a few months. Why not find someone else more convenient? Why choose me exclusively?

Laziness?

Don't kid yourself.

I have no idea why women would degrade themselves and agreeably enter into a sexual relationship with a man who only sees her as a means of jacking off.

OP, you're setting yourself for one hell of a heartache. Get some self respect and give that cookie only to a man who not only appreciates it, but respects it and cherishes it.

Truecap said it best.

So she answered the question.

Alright, again, thank you very much for the deep concern. Why having sex must be degrading to the woman? At least I'm choosing to have it with the person I want to have it with. Yes, I have feelings for him & yes, he only wants sex with me. It may be hard to manage but I make my own choice at my age & I know the consequences I'll bear 😄

Can't seem to get any deeper insights on the inconsistent & amusing behaviours that I'm rather trying to discuss here... Sooo oookayyy...

In the latest development, Cancer picks fight with me over something totally petty & unreasonable & said bye... You can add me to the list of "Cancer guy left me..." I guess he's forgoing sex too... I'm just being patient here... I don't know what to react.

Posted by taupixie
When I told him that he might fall in love with me after sleeping with me, he took it in stride, saying it might or it might never happen. Erm, Aquarius Moon?

This^^^^^^^^^^

Posted by taupixie
We continued back & forth where I told him if I took this step further (sleeping) with him, he'd destroy me because I do like him a lot.

click to expand

Contradicts this ^^^^^^

Are you self-assured or insecure?

@TaurusBull1977 tell me how not to contradict myself when I'm dealing with this Cancer that isn't exactly straight-forward? Those scenarios were part of our conversations of what might happen when talking about having sex with each other or not. Sorry if it's confusing... Perhaps why I'm confusing him too. LOL

@thinktoomuch I guess I have no more questions. I must've irked him so much he picked petty fight with me to say goodbye & forgoing the sex date...

@GC01 I'm prepared to sleep with him. I guess he can't handle me though

Oh well, I'm just trying to put effort into some kind of relationship... But I'm not even expecting anything anymore just going with his flow. He wants sex hell yeah let's have sex... But he backs away... Well okay then too. LOL. Can't put a gun to him to fuck me right? If it's not gonna happen, it won't happen then.

I think he's more scared of dealing with his own feelings rather than with my feelings. I just told him honestly everything about myself & how I feel. In the end, he's the one who backs away when I'm supposed to be the one feeling vulnerable. He wants to be a jerk or a gentleman, I think he couldn't decide.

@Taupixie,

I'm not a Cancer. Perhaps, other Cancers can give you a better insight to his behavior.

However, this false bravado you have going on is misleading.

I don't believe you are confusing him...but you're quite unsure about who you are and what you want.

If you are going to own the vagina and your sexuality, do it without prejudice and stipulations.

Posted by taupixie
I think he's more scared of dealing with his own feelings rather than with my feelings. I just told him honestly everything about myself & how I feel. In the end, he's the one who backs away when I'm supposed to be the one feeling vulnerable. He wants to be a jerk or a gentleman, I think he couldn't decide.

A FWB contract doesn't make a man a jerk.

Posted by taupixie
I think he's more scared of dealing with his own feelings rather than with my feelings. I just told him honestly everything about myself & how I feel. In the end, he's the one who backs away when I'm supposed to be the one feeling vulnerable. He wants to be a jerk or a gentleman, I think he couldn't decide.

No, he's not afraid of dealing with his own feelings. He's made it very clear that he's not wanting a relationship, he just wants to FUCK....aka get his rocks off, have fun in bed without any attachments. He's backing off because no matter how much you insist you might want the same thing he already knows in his bones that you want more/expect more/are seeking more from him than he wants to give and he's not dumb enough (hopefully he remains no dumb enough) to fall into that sort of tangled trap.

Posted by taupixie
In the latest development, Cancer picks fight with me over something totally petty & unreasonable & said bye... You can add me to the list of "Cancer guy left me..." I guess he's forgoing sex too... I'm just being patient here... I don't know what to react.

He doesnt want you or the strings that come with the sex.

Hun please dont settle as that is what you are attempting to do.. or fool yourself into thinking that if you have sex = he is yours.

move on 😢

they always just wants sex

this cancer guy said he wants nothing to do with me unless he gets nudes or were having sex with me

i don't even send nudes or have had sex at all

stay away from them honestly

You are trolling

Posted by LuckyLibra979
Sleep with me i have a venus in scorpio conjunct pluto ill give you 30 minutes of obsession n rough sex

You bad.

Thank you for all your insights.

In my last messages to Cancer man, I clarified my behaviours & intention & apologised for the confusing & misleading situation this led to. I had not heard from him & did not plan to approach him anymore, if I could constrain myself.

I noticed how different my attitude might be in approaching this compared to Cancer man's, & also how different all of you had viewed & responded to it. I don't see it as degrading, nor am I truly hurt by it... I see the opportunity to try to love someone as much as I could, albeit not accepted. At this point, I can only say perhaps I'm doing more hurt than love instead, so I'll stop what is perpetuating it. I'm only perhaps disappointed it didn't go the way I'd hope. But I learned from this. I can only move onwards because it is pointless to force whatever its not gonna happen.

Both of them are. 😆

It just didn't work out between us... No need to call names 😄

When I said earlier he couldn't decide becoming a jerk or gentleman, I only used the terms in reference... Not that I viewed him as such. In fairness, he hasn't done anything to hurt me.

lol...too funny Alicia