Posted by marshmallow
Posted by libralotus
Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
Hi, I'm Jelle! There goes your anonymity! A little light (lame) humor to put a half-smile on yer face.

I have a penis but I can imagine what it'd be like. You have to look at your living situation & circumstances. For starters, do you intend to even carry at full term? Or will it make things far more complicated for ya, financially and employment-wise?

If you don't see yourself being a mother at this stage, maybe it's because you're not meant to be one right now. If you want a kid later, at least you know you're fertile so you can always try it again when you're ready. Having a kid is very hard work, even harder when you're not ready.

You have to do what's best for yourself, and only you can decide what that is. If you're iffy about getting a termination, you can always adopt it out when it's born.

Thank you! I needed that. Anyways, I feel like I'm not in the right spot to give a child the life they deserve. I'm trying to focus on my career and on building a solid foundation.
Termination was what I was leaning towards but as the reality sets in its been frightening. I considered adoption but the physical aspect is hindering. I feel selfish and I guess I need someone to assure me.


Whats your age now ?
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I just turned 20.

Posted by AbbyNormal
Posted by libralotus
Posted by AbbyNormal
i got pregnant when i was almost 18. the father-to-be was definitely unfit to be a parent, as was I at the time. Remix has it right tho. no matter what your age, you must focus on the situation and the life you will be providing for the child. in my case, i had a terminally ill single parent raising me, i would not have been able to walk at graduation pregnant (all girls catholic school) and I didn't want to bring a baby into this world without two functional parents and that may be affected by the drugs i was taking recreationally (mdma and such). i chose to terminate and while it brought me great pain then and even now, i know it was the right choice for me. i have struggled a lot through life and I'm glad i didnt have a child to drag through it. there are a lot of reasons I'm glad i did it however i will always feel a bit of regret and curiosity. i am an adopted child whose birthmother was raped at 15 and had me at the age of 16 only to give me up for adoption to a better chance than she could not give me.... just think on it a little and keeping talking to other women. whatever you choose, my best wishes for you.


It's comforting to know that I'm not the only one to go through this. I've struggled a lot and it's the reason why I suffer from bipolar disorder which is another reason as to why I'm feeling incompetent. I know I'll feel guilt later on if I go through with it but I'm also trying to think about the life I could provide.


*hugs and squeezes*
here for ya lady! bipolar is a rough hand but if it makes you feel better, my mom was a Libra who battled thru divorce, depression, and cancer to give me the beautiful life i had growing up... she knew she had limited time with me and she set the best example she could for me as quickly as she could and I'll be forever grateful. she taught me so much in so little time.... a true gift....
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Wow, yeah my mom is a libra too and this would be a potential libra too. So weird.

Did you really do any research on the actual process? The more I read, it pains me but I feel like I should be informed.
Posted by AbbyNormal
i got pregnant when i was almost 18. the father-to-be was definitely unfit to be a parent, as was I at the time. Remix has it right tho. no matter what your age, you must focus on the situation and the life you will be providing for the child. in my case, i had a terminally ill single parent raising me, i would not have been able to walk at graduation pregnant (all girls catholic school) and I didn't want to bring a baby into this world without two functional parents and that may be affected by the drugs i was taking recreationally (mdma and such). i chose to terminate and while it brought me great pain then and even now, i know it was the right choice for me. i have struggled a lot through life and I'm glad i didnt have a child to drag through it. there are a lot of reasons I'm glad i did it however i will always feel a bit of regret and curiosity. i am an adopted child whose birthmother was raped at 15 and had me at the age of 16 only to give me up for adoption to a better chance than she could not give me.... just think on it a little and keeping talking to other women. whatever you choose, my best wishes for you.


It's comforting to know that I'm not the only one to go through this. I've struggled a lot and it's the reason why I suffer from bipolar disorder which is another reason as to why I'm feeling incompetent. I know I'll feel guilt later on if I go through with it but I'm also trying to think about the life I could provide.
Posted by TheLibraMudra
Posted by libralotus
Posted by TheLibraMudra
Posted by libralotus
Posted by TheLibraMudra
Hi, sis.

Are you still preggers? You said "was expecting" so I have to ask


Yeah. I didn't mean for that to be unclear!


First of all... Congrats

That baby is going to test you. Your body, your mind, your soul. You'll reach the lowest lows, the highest highs and it will be worth it. Even if he is not in the picture.

It's ok to be nervous, feeling like you're not cut out for the job but you are. From now on, you will see and feel the driving force of everything you do differently. You do it for your child.

You will be fine. If you feel anxious towards how you're going to make this all happen, things have a way of working themselves out. Always.

Do you have resources for help? Parenthelp123.com is where I went first. I had no idea what to do and couldn't stop crying. I was 22 when I got pregnant. I felt devastated. Her dad was not an ideal candidate. He didn't help much with her until she was about 6 months old. It was the hardest time of my life. I would have rather done it on my own from the start.
She is 5 now. I am proud not only of her but myself for making it when I thought I couldn't.


Aw! I appreciate that. I want to be happy and a part of me already feel compassion but it's also devastating. The dad wants no involvement and I barely keep myself afloat. I don't have any financial support or family close by to make it. I feel like keeping it would make or break me. I want to soar high but I don't have confidence that I could make that happen with a child. I come from a low class family and I've worked hard to dig myself out of it.


I understand. I remember telling my ex I was going to terminate the pregnancy. But then I went to my first ultrasound (alone - he didn't even want to come) and heard the heart beat. Within that little heart fluttering, I just knew that it and I were destined for greater things.

Have you gone in for an appointment? I suggest you don't listen to the heart if getting rid of it is what you want. It will stick with you forever.
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I haven't gone in for an appointment. I've called planned parenthood for services but this is all very recent for me and I don't even have a firm direction. I have to travel a couple hours to get the pill, and I wanted him to come to be a crutch. I really want him to take responsibility and I don't enjoy having to endure it on my own while he can shut it out entirely. I don't know if I would get an ultrasound then or what would take place. I'm so ignorant to all of this.
Posted by TheLibraMudra
I don't want to sway you from any decision you want.

But I work in a NICU. I've seen parents want to give up their parental rights. I've seen adoption parents come in as bio mom kisses her baby goodbye forever. It always ends in tremendous tears. I've even seen them back out of their decision, breaking the adoption family's heart. It's very, very hard.


No, I need to head various opinions so you're being very insightful. And I guess that's my problem with adoption. I feel like I wouldn't want to let go after nine months and it would forever be an open wound.

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
Posted by libralotus
Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
Hi, I'm Jelle! There goes your anonymity! A little light (lame) humor to put a half-smile on yer face.

I have a penis but I can imagine what it'd be like. You have to look at your living situation & circumstances. For starters, do you intend to even carry at full term? Or will it make things far more complicated for ya, financially and employment-wise?

If you don't see yourself being a mother at this stage, maybe it's because you're not meant to be one right now. If you want a kid later, at least you know you're fertile so you can always try it again when you're ready. Having a kid is very hard work, even harder when you're not ready.

You have to do what's best for yourself, and only you can decide what that is. If you're iffy about getting a termination, you can always adopt it out when it's born.

Thank you! I needed that. Anyways, I feel like I'm not in the right spot to give a child the life they deserve. I'm trying to focus on my career and on building a solid foundation.
Termination was what I was leaning towards but as the reality sets in its been frightening. I considered adoption but the physical aspect is hindering. I feel selfish and I guess I need someone to assure me.


Maybe you SHOULD be selfish, because you're the one carrying the baby inside you. The father is getting off scot-free, all he had to do was drop his pants. You're the one doing all the heavy lifting. It's your body, your decision 100% . And since the guy is a sack-a-butter, the decision is yours even more.

Termination is a scary thing to think about but it's not as bad as it sounds......not that I'd know



Heh I have a friend who did have a termination a few years ago, and she was even still together with her partner......and she didn't even tell him she was pregnant. The way she went about it was stinky, but she had decided what was right for her own body. Plus the guy was a bit of a dog so I guess she couldn't trust him to be there for her longterm when it counted.

She was completely fine afterwards.
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Yes, I'm SO upset that he has the capability to shut this out and not deal with it. That is a major factor in this. He wants to silence me because he doesn't want his now girlfriend to find out. I'm blocked on social media and he said that when this is done with that he wants no contact with me. It makes me want to prolong it but it's out of vengeance.

Posted by LiveAndLove
What do you want to do? Just make sure you know your ex may not be in the picture and although he will have a financial responsibility to help support your child, he may not be a decent Father. Or he might I don't know him. I hope he is responsible in that sense should you keep your baby.

This is pretty much exactly what happened with my ex husband and I. Not together very long, wasn't careful and found out I was pregnant after we stopped seeing each other. I'm a year and a half older than him so I just turned 21 and he was 19. So more so for him but we were pretty young when this happened. He panicked.

I had my son because I wanted to though, not to get back with him. We stayed friends while he dated a new girl every week lol. We wound up getting back together when my son was 7 months old and got married when he was 3, but all of that never would've happened if I didn't get pregnant. We were never meant to be together.

But we were, and now my oldest is almost 18, and I have 4 kids total with him. He's still a Disney Dad though

A lot of empty promises and all talk, when he sees them he spoils them, but could care less if I have enough money to take care of them and make sure they're fed, have a roof over there heads, etc. He's my ex husband for a reason. Well, many reasons.

If you did keep the baby would you have support from your family? That's what got me through the hard times. And just knowing I wanted to be a Mom and I'd do anything I had to to take care of him.But if you really feel like you aren't ready to be a parent, then maybe you aren't which is ok too. It's a life changing huge responsibility that doesn't end the moment they turn 18 or love out. I still rely on my parents for emotional support bad financially they helped me to get out of my marriage since I was stuck. You can pm me if you want to. Good luck ❤



Wow, this is basically my scenario. He's definitely not responsible or someone that I could see supporting me or my decision. His stance is pretty clear and his unwillingness to be involved.

I'm sorry that you went through that because I know how much emotional and physical toture it's been. As far as my family, my mom is emotionally supportive but any financial assistance is very doubtful. My brother on the other hand is very unpredictable and I don't know if he would be helpful or disown me based on the fact we are just now on talking terms after a huge blowout.

I think if I could provide more I would be more inclined in keeping it but I don't have anyone to rely on. I've been independent and my family is so far away.

Posted by TheLibraMudra
Posted by libralotus
Posted by TheLibraMudra
Hi, sis.

Are you still preggers? You said "was expecting" so I have to ask


Yeah. I didn't mean for that to be unclear!


First of all... Congrats

That baby is going to test you. Your body, your mind, your soul. You'll reach the lowest lows, the highest highs and it will be worth it. Even if he is not in the picture.

It's ok to be nervous, feeling like you're not cut out for the job but you are. From now on, you will see and feel the driving force of everything you do differently. You do it for your child.

You will be fine. If you feel anxious towards how you're going to make this all happen, things have a way of working themselves out. Always.

Do you have resources for help? Parenthelp123.com is where I went first. I had no idea what to do and couldn't stop crying. I was 22 when I got pregnant. I felt devastated. Her dad was not an ideal candidate. He didn't help much with her until she was about 6 months old. It was the hardest time of my life. I would have rather done it on my own from the start.
She is 5 now. I am proud not only of her but myself for making it when I thought I couldn't.
click to expand


Aw! I appreciate that. I want to be happy and a part of me already feel compassion but it's also devastating. The dad wants no involvement and I barely keep myself afloat. I don't have any financial support or family close by to make it. I feel like keeping it would make or break me. I want to soar high but I don't have confidence that I could make that happen with a child. I come from a low class family and I've worked hard to dig myself out of it.
Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
Hi, I'm Jelle! There goes your anonymity! A little light (lame) humor to put a half-smile on yer face.

I have a penis but I can imagine what it'd be like. You have to look at your living situation & circumstances. For starters, do you intend to even carry at full term? Or will it make things far more complicated for ya, financially and employment-wise?

If you don't see yourself being a mother at this stage, maybe it's because you're not meant to be one right now. If you want a kid later, at least you know you're fertile so you can always try it again when you're ready. Having a kid is very hard work, even harder when you're not ready.

You have to do what's best for yourself, and only you can decide what that is. If you're iffy about getting a termination, you can always adopt it out when it's born.

Thank you! I needed that. Anyways, I feel like I'm not in the right spot to give a child the life they deserve. I'm trying to focus on my career and on building a solid foundation.
Termination was what I was leaning towards but as the reality sets in its been frightening. I considered adoption but the physical aspect is hindering. I feel selfish and I guess I need someone to assure me.
Posted by TheLibraMudra
Hi, sis.

Are you still preggers? You said "was expecting" so I have to ask


Yeah. I didn't mean for that to be unclear!
I'd like to mention first this is very personal and I was contemplating posting this. I would really appreciate kindness and seriousness in your replies. I haven't opened up to anyone but I figured some unbiased and anonymity could be helpful.

Anyways, I found out I was expecting. It's obvious that I'm not equipped to be a mother nor was it planned. It's a surprise considering that I was being safe and I'm not promiscous. With that said, the father is a guy that I haven't known very long and is not supportive. Our short-lived relationship was over before I found out and he's gone back to his ex.

This is obviously difficult for me to handle so I was seeking advice from anyone that's been in my position before. Lastly, I also would like to add that I think it's peculiar because my progressed moon in cancer simultaneously moved into the fifth house.
Posted by HarleyTwinFlame
Posted by libralotus
I don't think we're lazy. We just direct our ambition and passion to select things.


Exactly

And we have to see if it's worth our time.
I go full out for those who I know would do the same for me
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Yeah but I hate when it's not reciprocated. Balance I guess

Posted by ScorpioTruth
Posted by libralotus
Never had luck with my venus in Virgo. I've attracted a few of these recently and it just doesn't work hah


I also have Venus in Virgo and two of my exes (both long term relationships) had Aqua Venus. I can't keep away from those guys. Smdh I think the Libran influence in my chart (4 placements) is attracted to that aloof quality.
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Yeah I'm a libra dominant. Usually attract cap sun venus in Aqua

I don't think we're lazy. We just direct our ambition and passion to select things.

8 hours
Never had luck with my venus in Virgo. I've attracted a few of these recently and it just doesn't work hah
Posted by WonderWoman14
Posted by libralotus
Same


Maybe I have too much Libra in me haha
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Likely