@SweetNSexyBull
10 Years
Taurus female about to give up on Cancer Male
Cancer/cancer been dating year and half, deep emotional attachment & still the thought of full commitment is making my heart race with anxiety now.
We aren't exactly older (that's kinda relative though) & we both have teen kids. I won't know until I'm more settled in my careers but I think we're both hesitant due to new careers at the time we met. We need to feel more established in them before devoting time elsewhere.
He may have something he wants to work on or he may be set in his ways.
I know giving up my home is a huge thought in the back of my mind when thinking of commitment. I don't want anything from anyone else I only want him but I don't want him around everyday.
So it sounds like you are having trouble getting your crab to commit, but three months really isn't that long. A Sag had to put in almost 12 months once before I finally committed. A Taurus managed to hook me in six. Granted, those two relationships were long distance. Even though things weren't exclusive during that time with either of them, I still didn't mess around with any other girls. I just needed to establish security, and for most crabs, that is when they will commit.
There is not enough to go off of. Perhaps he committed too quickly with the women in his two divorces? Were either of them emotionally/physically abusive towards him? How's his relationship with his mother? How about with his kids? Does he have significant debt other than a car or mortgage?
A new career when you met three months earlier, is still a new career. Keep in mind he is a single father to teens, and don't forget that home is where this man's heart is. His intuition is also very likely keen on the idea of who moves into whose home, and knows there is a bit of a clash there. He also likely puts it off seeing as being only three months into the relationship.
You move quite fast for a bull, but you also say you don't want him around everyday. If he has strong Cancer traits, then when he does commit, he will be happiest with you, and you being part of his family. He will want you in his bed every night. If he senses your contradictive approach as I do, he'll never commit.
I think you answered both mine & calm crabs post at the same time lol!
I want a boyfriend at this point, not looking to get engaged or married . Just one on one. I believe I would relax if that was to happen and things would get much better. Sex is phenomenal but it eventually starts to suck if you can't express yourself emotionally or even look at your man in intimate moments. I truly care for him and I don't know how to bring this up without sounding like a nag or trying to create drama. I do not want to stress him out as he has a stressful job as it is
You're too funny !! I wont do that.
Posted by SweetNSexyBull
Hi. Need advice from Cancer men please.. Love this forum btw; it helped me tremendously so far but I'm at a crossroads now & I don't know how to proceed. Been dating almost 3 months, text every day, I initiate & he does as well. We are older , met online dating site. Both divorced twice, he has a teenage son & I have an adult daughter. I want an exclusive relationship, I have made it clear from the beginning. I have said it about 2 times during the 3 months. I know what I like when I see it! But we aren't moving forward & All he tells me is that I'm the only one he's dating. Help please..But wanting a commitment right away sends the wrong message though: that you are looking for a relationship and not love. 3 months is very fast.
I totally hear ya, and I was in somewhat the same situation as you, but looking back - you can´t forge trust and such deep feelings for each other in just 3 months.
I tried for 9 months in total, and it was hard and frankly I couldn´t do it, ´cause I felt uncomfortable staying with someone for so long and not have them want to call me theirs. So that ruined a lot of things. But after 9 months we did get somewhere, and I think he was actually about to make it official, but then some weird things happened and he believed me to have lied and cheated on him. So that was a total slap in the face, so now looking back, I regret that I didn´t listen more to what I want for myself insted of trying so hard to please another person, who constantly rejected me.I look back ad think t myself, that he knew he could never fall in love with me, but I was someone/something who made him feel good, and he didn´t want to let that go. Even though he always said, he never betted on two horses at the same time (me or our thing being the horse), but he certainly did befriend many women and girls on facebook and liked all their pictures sometimes making comments, while telling people I was his friend. So there. Regret on my end for sticking with it for so long, especially ´cause all I got in the end was the accusation of lying and cheating.
True life experience.
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I have to disagree with your first sentence here. The issue is that she is an adult with grown children and knows what she is looking for. It is perfectly reasonable for her to express her wants, and then HE can either say, yes I want the same, or no, I'm not at that place in my life right now. She doesn't want someone to waste her time. She wants someone who has the same goal who would like to try to make it work.
I understand you saying that it is fast, and it is, but I think she's speaking from the context that he won't answer.
I say, let him go, because he's not going to move fo
Posted by YourFavoriteDXPMember
Posted by CalmCrab22
Cancer/cancer been dating year and half, deep emotional attachment & still the thought of full commitment is making my heart race with anxiety now.
We aren't exactly older (that's kinda relative though) & we both have teen kids. I won't know until I'm more settled in my careers but I think we're both hesitant due to new careers at the time we met. We need to feel more established in them before devoting time elsewhere.
He may have something he wants to work on or he may be set in his ways.
I know giving up my home is a huge thought in the back of my mind when thinking of commitment. I don't want anything from anyone else I only want him but I don't want him around everyday.Hold the damn phone....
1.5 years together, and still no commitment?
What the hell is wrong with this picture!?!?
click to expand
Maybe that you didn't read I don't want one. From jump I made it very clear I was happy to be free from the suffocation of relationships.
Posted by SweetNSexyBull
I think you answered both mine & calm crabs post at the same time lol!
Lol I saw that too. I didn't need an answer though
Posted by YourFavoriteDXPMember
Posted by CalmCrab22
Cancer/cancer been dating year and half, deep emotional attachment & still the thought of full commitment is making my heart race with anxiety now.
We aren't exactly older (that's kinda relative though) & we both have teen kids. I won't know until I'm more settled in my careers but I think we're both hesitant due to new careers at the time we met. We need to feel more established in them before devoting time elsewhere.
He may have something he wants to work on or he may be set in his ways.
I know giving up my home is a huge thought in the back of my mind when thinking of commitment. I don't want anything from anyone else I only want him but I don't want him around everyday.Hold the damn phone....
1.5 years together, and still no commitment?
What the hell is wrong with this picture!?!?
Maybe that you didn't read I don't want one. From jump I made it very clear I was happy to be free from the suffocation of relationships.
click to expand
He has reading comprehension issues, along with bigot issues, plus he hates crabs but he's obsessed with them, so don't take him too seriously. I understood what you were saying to OP, basically that her crab could be in the same mindset as you.
Posted by YourFavoriteDXPMember
Posted by CalmCrab22
Cancer/cancer been dating year and half, deep emotional attachment & still the thought of full commitment is making my heart race with anxiety now.
We aren't exactly older (that's kinda relative though) & we both have teen kids. I won't know until I'm more settled in my careers but I think we're both hesitant due to new careers at the time we met. We need to feel more established in them before devoting time elsewhere.
He may have something he wants to work on or he may be set in his ways.
I know giving up my home is a huge thought in the back of my mind when thinking of commitment. I don't want anything from anyone else I only want him but I don't want him around everyday.Hold the damn phone....
1.5 years together, and still no commitment?
What the hell is wrong with this picture!?!?
Maybe that you didn't read I don't want one. From jump I made it very clear I was happy to be free from the suffocation of relationships.
He has reading comprehension issues, along with bigot issues, plus he hates crabs but he's obsessed with them, so don't take him too seriously. I understood what you were saying to OP, basically that her crab could be in the same mindset as you.
click to expand
Yes that was the point. Thank you.
Yea I'm not going to entertain his constant digs.
Lmaooo @donnaelvira77 made my day
Thinktoomuch: Thank u for your thoughtful answer. Thank you everyone who took the time to comment; it is greatly appreciated. I sure would like to hear from some male Crabs as well!🙂. I've decided to take a step back, see if he follows. Just a little one.🙂
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Hi. Need advice from Cancer men please.. Love this forum btw; it helped me tremendously so far but I'm at a crossroads now & I don't know how to proceed. Been dating almost 3 months, text every day, I initiate & he does as well. We are older , met online dating site. Both divorced twice, he has a teenage son & I have an adult daughter. I want an exclusive relationship, I have made it clear from the beginning. I have said it about 2 times during the 3 months. I know what I like when I see it! But we aren't moving forward & All he tells me is that I'm the only one he's dating. Help please..