WHY ARE CANCERS SO COLD—

I would like to understand from cancers how do you control your feelings like a light switch. One minute you're all into a person sharing your personal business and the next minute you act like that person never existed. I just don't get it. A cancer man basically used me for temporary affection and companionship and I would like to tell him exactly how I feel about what he did to me. I really just want to get it off my chest. We are no longer together and it's been a month. I don't want to tell him off but I would just like to express what he did. I am not looking for anything from him I just want him to know. Do you think it will matter?
Please I really want to hear from Cancer man and women. Thank you.

Thanks Finnuff for you're advice and I think you might be right. I am the one that ended the relationship but I do need closure.

I believe it @ Cluelesscancer I was married to one for over 10 years.

For one cancer cant control their feelings they feel external environment and react accordingly to the external so if you feel a cancer person is 'cold' it is you that has made them so.

this is basic human philosophy if you care enough to examine or observe the people

Posted by mfwb55
For one cancer cant control their feelings they feel external environment and react accordingly to the external so if you feel a cancer person is 'cold' it is you that has made them so.

This is true. Also, the "cold" behavior is just another form of our emotional extremes. It's the direct opposite of "hot". What drives me to be icy cold is extreme behaviors in others towards me in a negative way. For instance, my ex friend, a Virgo, who betrayed me for my ex husband....I gave her immediate cold. She's cut out completely and I want nothing to do with her. If she persists in contacting me I will be viciously verbally cutting with her and put her in her place, again.

@mfwb55 what your saying is absolutely correct and you don't have to be a cancer. Any human can become cold based on how they are being treated by another person. It is my opinion that cancers can be very cold with the things that they do and sometimes it can happen within hours or days. If you love so hard how do you turn those feelings off love and caring to acting like a person is dead? It makes you wonder if it was real in the first place.

The best way I can describe it is the "for every action there is an opposite and equal reaction". We love DEEPLY and when that love/trust is purposely tossed aside and trampled on then we HATE deeply.

you dont turn the feelings off they change to realising the person isnt the one for you and then have to understand that they werent the real deal anyway so no matter if you still love a person its the external environment thats changes you into realising what really is and what really isnt

I still love the people I love and will always love them. Its just that it was all a set up and thats what changes. I dont tolerate people who lie to me or use me or hurt me or anything liek that jsut so they can have something to tell their so called mates at the end of the day. This is true of my first love and myex husband even though they will deny it and say no it wasn t like that at all blah blah blah when it was coz thats how i perceive it and then they get people here on dxp to go pretend to be a 'friend' just so they can get info on my saying what it was like to use against me when they deem fit to and to try to destroy me with this? Yeh keep on keeping on with it idiots you never got to me in the first place and you never will either or ever. Goodbye fucktards

Yeh and I find it really funny that you people make out that you are genuinely helpful but in actuallity cannot wait to hurt another and you go and ask why are cancers so cold? Brrr, Der with shit being thrown at them like that well i wonder anyone would be so 'cold' LOL you people are so funny.

Maybe try not to have any frugs before you go here in dxp huh?

Thank you @moonartist totally understand.

it's self preservation.

I'm sure there's a few who are assholes and who hurt people for fun but if a Cancer has given the ultra cold shoulder go take a long, hard look in the mirror and figure out what you did to hurt that Crab. We rarely go cold without reason.

thank u for playing plz try again

TRUST NO ONE>>>SOME thing's out there.lol. We don't trust people because when we give kindness and open our ...shells, u see THE BEST in us. IF you fuck it up...beware and be aware you will see cold like da winter in WINTERFELL.

Posted by ReddmannScorch
TRUST NO ONE>>>SOME thing's out there.lol. We don't trust people because when we give kindness and open our ...shells, u see THE BEST in us. IF you fuck it up...beware and be aware you will see cold like da winter in WINTERFELL.

Yep! exactly this! Also, we intuitively pick and choose who we open up to and how much. Each person we come into contact with is being scanned, felt out and categorized. If we have any inkling or suspicion that we can't fully trust someone then they never get in. Period.

The ex friend (virgo) got a renewed taste of the icy cold. Stupid backstabber called and was trying to snoop and dig for info so she could report to the ex and I finally dropped the politeness, called her out on her shit all over again and reminded her that she isn't my friend and isn't wanted or needed in my life. Then I hung up on her when she wouldn't stop the crap, the drama and the lies. Cold? No one does cold the way a cancer does. We make winterfell seem warm and cozy.

Posted by CluelessCancer

Posted by MoonArtist
The ex friend (virgo) got a renewed taste of the icy cold. Stupid backstabber called and was trying to snoop and dig for info so she could report to the ex and I finally dropped the politeness, called her out on her shit all over again and reminded her that she isn't my friend and isn't wanted or needed in my life. Then I hung up on her when she wouldn't stop the crap, the drama and the lies. Cold? No one does cold the way a cancer does. We make winterfell seem warm and cozy.

LMAO...lol this post warmed my heart. Kick her to the curb. Lying wench.

click to expand

Amen and I did....again since she didn't "get it" the last time. She honestly had the nerve to try pretending we were still friends and she cared about me. She lied and denied lying despite the fact that I have emails from her that prove in her own words that she's a lying back stabber. I guess being nice is mistaken for being a complete idiot with no brain.

Something you did or said.

cancers cold? ...sorry but that's just bullcrap.

i want iceCream so cold,te coldr the better

Posted by Finbuff
Yes, we do have the ability to shut it down completely
when it becomes evident the relationship isn't what we wanted.
It may not be that we don't have feelings, we just have discipline
to deal with the temp pain when it becomes obvious that expending
any additional psychological energy is pointless. Complicated to
explain - there's more to it.

Yes .. you're on point. Cancers have the ability to see and observe what isn't going right and what we don't want to see. Lack off communication, meaning ... don't say what you don't mean. We like to see ... say what you mean ... and mean what you say. If not, we pick up on it right away ... it's our intuitive sense .. then we cut off all communication and won't expend the energy to trying to figure you out, argue a point, or try to resolve it. What's done, is done. We can disappear and retreat ... without a trace. That's the discipline of our nature.

Posted by CrabTwinsFish
Lack of communication, meaning ... don't say what you don't mean.

^^This.
Cancers can get misinterpreted from a lot of the sites on the internet. They appreciate directness--not in a harsh manner, but in an honest approach.
The whole "side to side" thing is because they sense masked motives when they see them, and respond accordingly.